Seeing in the Dark
by Disgruntled Minion
Summary: AU: For when there are no words, music is the next best thing. Because music is universal. It's a language of its own. It's sound and pictures in one. It's imagination and reality. Music is life in motion. Seb/Ciel
1. Opus 1

**A/N: **New story! This story pretty much wrote itself, haha and I'm really excited to post it ^^ I hope y'all enjoy it! Many, many thanks to **socialbutrfly1379 **for being my amazing beta again! She was awesome working on this story :3

**Warnings**: Language, mentions of alcohol use

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Kuroshitsuji

* * *

The sound of a roaring plane thundered overhead. It seemed to shake the ceiling above but no one paid attention to the loud noise. It was all too common at an airport and no one batted an eyelash at the noise. Instead, they continued to rush about the airport, running from one gate to another while others milled about around the shops.

Another plane took off, nothing but a slowly shrinking line of silver in the evening sky. It vanished into the sunset before another plane took its place. The flow of planes remained steady, a constant dance of landing and taking off. A symphony of thundering roars and screeching tires, along with the loud chorus of people moving throughout the terminals.

It proved interesting to watch for the first hour or so, but it quickly lost its appeal after the fifth hour. Fingers drummed against the armrest and Ciel resisted the urge to look at his phone again. The sinking sun told him exactly how late it was and how long he had sat waiting in baggage claim.

A frustrated noise left his mouth and Ciel twisted around in his seat to look at the moving carousel. A lone bag shuffled around on the conveyer belt and Ciel wondered how long it would take until someone came to claim it.

"Wonder how long it'll take for someone to come claim me," he muttered under his breath.

He turned his attention back to his phone and the game he played on it. It had faithfully kept him entertained for the past two hours but as his frustration mounted, it quickly lost its appeal. With a disgusted sigh, he slipped the device into his pocket and stood up. His legs protested the motion after sitting for so long and Ciel leaned over to stretch his back.

It popped pleasantly and Ciel straightened up again before grabbing his bag. He needed to walk around for a while or he would go crazy from sitting still. That, and the nearby security guards kept giving him curious looks with each hour that passed. No doubt, they wondered about his situation and monitored him for any more suspicious activity.

It only helped to fuel Ciel's frustration and he stomped away from the baggage claim. Not for the first time, Ciel cursed the person responsible for his current suffering.

The glass doors slid open and Ciel stepped outside, wincing as hot, dry air rushed forward to greet him. It pressed against his face and instantly wrapped around his body in an uncomfortable embrace. The sounds of vehicles driving by and horns blaring joined the chorus that was the airport, and Ciel scanned the nearby cars for any signs of a battered yellow car.

He didn't see any, not that Ciel expected any less, and he trudged over to the nearest bench to wait again. His stomach growled and demanded food as he sat down, and Ciel clenched his hands together in a failed attempt to keep it quiet.

This wasn't how Ciel envisioned his trip to unfold when he left this morning. He expected to wait for a while before Alois picked him up, but five hours pushed his patience. He only hoped that this wasn't a sign of how the remainder of his visit would play out.

A blur of yellow appeared in his peripheral vision and Ciel perked up. He scowled though as a taxi drove by and a string of curses left his mouth. "That's it," he swore and fumbled for his phone. He punched in a number and waited impatiently for Alois to pick up.

"Ciel~," a voice slurred after several rings and Ciel pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. "Ciel, 'm soooo drunk right now."

"Alois," Ciel seethed. "Where are you?"

A giggle. "Home with the guys." A loud clatter sounded through the speakers, followed by loud, obnoxious laughter in the background. "Dropped the phone," Alois said after a few seconds, barely finishing the sentence before bursting into laughter.

Ciel gripped his phone tighter. "Alois. When are you coming to pick me up? I've been at the airport for hours." Silence stretched across the speakers and Ciel pulled the phone back to check his signal. He still had his bars and the call remained connected. "Alois?" he tried again.

"W'at are you talkin' 'bout, Ciel?" Alois finally said. "You don't come 'till next month."

"I told you yesterday that I would arrive today," Ciel spat. "Or were you drunk then too and you can't remember any of our conversations anymore?"

Alois giggled again. "Maybe," he teased. "Oh man, the room is spinnin', Ciel. McMillan always gets the best booze."

"Alois!" Ciel practically shouted into the phone, drawing several strange stares in his direction. He pointedly ignored them. "How am I getting to your place if you and the rest of your roommates are too drunk to even walk? I'm not taking a taxi all the way out there. I don't have that kind of money."

"Relax Ciel," Alois said. "Why are you so worked up? You're not in town yet."

Another bout of laughter echoed through the phone and Ciel ended the call in disgust. He knew this would happen. Perhaps not exactly this scenario, but something close to it. A part of him had hoped that Alois would come through in the end and prove him wrong, but that part now remained shattered at Ciel's feet.

He had never been so mad with Alois before, but this incident easily took the cake. Three months ago, Ciel had booked his tickets with the confirmation from Alois that he would pick him up at the airport. Alois had promised up and down to be there when he arrived and that they would spend the summer together to celebrate Ciel's recent graduation.

With a frustrated snarl, Ciel grabbed his bags again and made his way back to the baggage claim. He didn't want to stay at the airport tonight and he had a feeling the security guards wouldn't let him. Furthermore, by the time Alois slept off his hangover, it would be close to noon and Ciel didn't plan to wait that long in the airport for Alois to come pick him up.

Provided Alois even remembered their conversation come morning. Somehow, Ciel seriously doubted he would.

The doors slid open, sending cool air rushing over his body but Ciel barely felt the comfortable air as he searched for the nearest security guard. After a few seconds of looking, he spotted one and Ciel dragged his bags over to the man. The officer visibly tensed and a wary look settled over his face, no doubt concerned about the irate person headed his way.

"Can I help you?" the man asked.

Ciel nodded. "Can you tell me where the nearest hotel is?" he asked, trying his best to remain polite but his frustration filled his voice and he ended up spitting out the question. "My bastard friend left me stranded here," he added.

The officer winced at his assertion and he nodded. "Come with me and I'll check if they have any vacancies. The nearest one is on the airport grounds, but the rooms are usually booked."

"Great, just great," Ciel muttered under his breath and followed the officer to the security office. "Do you happen to know how much a room costs?"

"I want to say the rates start around a hundred."

Ciel swore and his hand tightened around the handle of his bags. The reason he agreed to stay with Alois, despite his extreme dislike of Alois's roommates, was to save money. Staying at a hotel for an extended time would quickly eat into his budget, something Ciel couldn't afford right now.

"Have a seat," the officer said as they entered the office. "And I'll make some calls."

"What's going on?" another officer asked. He looked at Ciel with curious amber eyes and Ciel threw himself in the nearest seat, uncaring what the man thought about him.

The first officer grunted. "He's stranded. Friend left him at the airport so he needs to find a place to stay for the night."

Amber eyes blinked and the man stood up. "Just take a taxi."

Ciel scoffed. "He lives almost half an hour away. Do you know how expensive that would be? Plus, he's too drunk right now to even remember that I arrived today, let alone this month." Bitterness crept into his words. "I would rather not show up at his place when everyone there is drunk off their ass."

"You should choose your friends better."

"Claude!" the first officer exclaimed and smacked him in the arm with a clipboard. "Don't say that. The poor kid has been stuck here since, what, noon? Have you even had anything to eat since you landed?"

Blue eyes narrowed. "No, to your question," Ciel said to the first officer and turned to Claude. "And so you know, my friend wasn't always like that. It was only after he moved down here for college that he changed for the worst. Now all he does is go out partying every night and skipping classes because he's too hung over in the morning to function properly. I blame his roommates. He was never like this before he left."

Claude smirked. "Pity that happened," he said and turned to the other officer. "Go get him something to eat, Ronald."

Ron nodded and scurried away. Ciel watched him go; silently wishing that Claude had gone to get the food instead of Ron. At least then, he wouldn't have to stay with Claude in a cramped office. He looked back at Claude and scowled when he realized amber eyes still watched him with amusement. "What?" he spat.

"What are you going to do if your friend doesn't come and pick you up tomorrow?" Claude asked. "You can't stay at the hotel airport for the remainder of your trip. Well, I suppose you could but I feel that would be rather boring. Especially if you came to see the sights."

Ciel bit his lip and looked away. The thought had already crossed his mind and Ciel didn't know what the best course of action was. He knew Claude was right. He couldn't stay holed up in the hotel for the remainder of summer or until Alois came to his senses. At best, that would be a month, seeing as Alois didn't expect him here until the following month.

He wanted to see the downtown sights and other nearby spots that Alois always raved about, and he couldn't exactly do that when he remained on airport property. For now, he had no choice but to remain at the airport but after that remained a blank.

"I won't let him ruin my trip," he finally said. "I'll find a different hotel to stay at for the rest of my trip and do the things that I came to do."

The smirk on Claude's lips grew wider. "And how do you plan to do that?"

Ciel huffed. "I'll do some research tonight at the hotels business center and go from there. I'm not that incompetent that I can't take care of myself, you know."

"Never said you were," Claude stated and stretched his arms over his head. They lowered and he pushed his glasses up after they slid down the bridge of his nose. "But if you're going into the city, as I'm assuming you are, how do you plan to get out there?"

Ciel faltered at the question and his fingers twirled around each other as he thought about the question. He could always take a cab, but he still preferred a different means of transportation. The hotel costs already hurt his budget and he didn't want to add cab fare onto the growing list of expenses. "I'll look for a hotel that offers shuttle services. Or rent a car," he stated at last and shot Claude a nasty look. "Unless you have another idea."

Claude circled around the desk and leaned against the edge. Ciel watched him warily, uncomfortable with the knowing smirk that seemed permanently stained on Claude's lips. It made him uneasy and Ciel hoped that Ron came back soon. He didn't want to remain alone with Claude for any longer than he needed.

"Do you like music?" Claude asked suddenly.

The abrupt change of subjects caught Ciel off guard and he blinked at Claude. "What?"

"Do you," Claude repeated slowly. "Like music?"

Ciel nodded. "Yeah. Why?"

"What kind?"

"Is there a point to all this?" Claude gave him a look and Ciel threw his hands up in the air, exasperated. "All kinds, okay? Does it really matter what kind of music I like?"

Claude chuckled and crossed his arms over his chest. "What about classical?"

"I don't have anything against it," Ciel said. "I played the cello when I was younger."

If anything, the answer made the smirk on Claude's mouth deepen and he pushed away from the desk as the door opened. Ron entered with a small bag in his hand, eyes darting between them at the tension in the room.

"I found a bagel for you," he said and handed the bag over to Ciel before turning to look at Claude. "Did you check the hotel?"

Claude nodded. "They were booked, but I have a better place for him to stay."

Ciel sputtered and almost dropped the bag. "You never even called the hotel. And there's no way in hell that I'm staying with you." He paused. "Or any other place you had in mind."

The smirk on Claude's face dropped slightly and Ciel watched him practically age before him. "Look, I'm not happy about this any more than you, but you need my help and I need yours." He ran a hand through his hair. "And before you protest, you won't stay with me. I'd rather lock myself in the jail before letting you set foot in my apartment. My friend though is a different story."

"I told you I'm not staying anywhere but a hotel," Ciel stated hotly.

"Just hear me out. You're not exactly in the best place to argue right now. You're stranded and you have no way of accomplishing the things you wanted to do without spending money that you didn't plan on spending," Claude snapped and Ciel clamped his mouth shut despite himself. "I'm trying to help you out here and dammit all, I'm desperate to help my friend right now."

Ron shifted in the corner, breaking the tension with his movements but not the silence. Ciel swallowed heavily and stared at Claude, noting the tension in his shoulders and in the lines of his mouth. They told a story of stress, not from the job but from something outside that and amber eyes told the remaining story.

Desperation flickered through the depths of Claude's eyes and if Ciel looked hard enough, he could see a veiled plea that bordered on begging. And someone as proud and annoying as Claude didn't beg easily. But beyond that, the emotion that swam the deepest was that of concern.

The look made Ciel lower his eyes and gaze at the tiled floor beneath his shoes. He toed one of the lines as his fingers clutched each other in a tight embrace.

"I'm listening," he said softly. But in the quiet room, the words sounded like the crack of a starting gun fired at a race. They tore through the silence and ripped down the tension that had grown ever since Claude last spoke.

A heavy sigh left Claude's mouth and he tugged off his glasses. "Trust me when I say that I'm desperate. My friend is running himself ragged by keeping himself locked in his apartment and slaving over his work. Every time I see him, he looks worse and I'm worried that he's going to end up breaking down with no hope of coming back." He set his glasses on the desk. "He needs to get out for a while and take his mind off his work before it consumes him."

Ciel watched as Claude clasped his hands in front of him. Amber eyes focused on a random spot, seeing but not seeing. "My friend, he's a good man. Better than most, and I'm not just saying that because he's my friend. He's been through his own trails and came out on top. It's not always easy to do that." He blinked and opened his mouth to say something else, but closed it last minute.

"And where do I fit into all this?" Ciel asked cautiously once he knew Claude wasn't going to speak again.

"You want to see the sights around downtown," Claude said. "And I want my friend to get out and take a break from work. This way, we both win. Plus, you get a free place to stay and it beats paying for an expensive hotel."

Ciel frowned and leaned back in his chair. "What's the catch?"

Claude gave a tight smile. "There's one small catch, but it's nothing that you need to worry about. He doesn't have a criminal background, he's not violent, his place is always clean, and he's not a sexual fiend. He has a steady job, lives in a nice neighborhood, and is smart." He cocked his head. "Did I leave anything out?"

"What's the catch though?" Ciel pressed.

Claude shook his head. "He obviously doesn't know that I'm planning on having you stay with him." He shrugged. "I'm sure he'll protest and fight me, but he won't hold that against you if you stay. If anything, he'll give me the cold shoulder for a while."

"How do I know he won't kick me out after you leave or that he'll even accept me in the first place?" Ciel asked. "I'm putting a lot on the line if I agree."

It was a lie and they both knew it. Ciel had nothing to lose from accepting the offer. If Claude's friend turned him down, the worst that could happen was that Ciel would have to stay at the hotel as he originally planned. But if he stayed with the man, then Ciel would save several hundred dollars.

"He's not the type of person to do something like that," Claude answered and slipped his glasses back on his face. "He won't dislike you for something I did."

"And why do you think I'm the right person to help your friend? We just met, you and I, and you don't know a single thing about me," Ciel pointed out.

"You like music."

Ciel blinked and leaned forward. "What?"

Claude inclined his head. "You're right, I don't know anything about you. You could go in there and rob him blind if you wanted. I told you I'm desperate." He shifted his weight. "But you like music."

"What does that have to do with anything?" Ciel pressed.

"My friend is a composer," Claude stated. "And a damn good one at that. You two share an interest in music and that alone is enough for me right now. Plus, I know a little about your personality and your mind just by how you acted in this room. I'm usually a good judge of character and I know you won't do anything to my friend."

A heavy sigh left Ciel's mouth and he rubbed his arm as he weighed his options. With nothing left to lose, he knew he should accept the offer. Claude's friend sounded like a nice person from all that he said. Ciel only hoped that Claude wasn't playing up his friend and that this whole thing wouldn't backfire on him.

"If something happens to me while I'm at your friend's place, I'll come back and haunt you," Ciel said. "Or I'll sue you for all that you're worth."

Claude grinned and placed a hand over his heart. "I swear upon my life that my friend won't do anything against you. Me on the other hand," he trailed off with a low laugh and reached into his pocket. "Here, your temporary roommate. Just so you know that I'm not trying to pull a fast one on you."

Ciel stood up and crossed the small room, accepting the phone. Two figures stood in the picture and Ciel quickly picked out Claude. He glanced at the other person and traced their features with his eyes. "What's his name?"

"Sebastian Michaelis."

Ron snorted with laughter and Ciel jumped at the noise. "Sebastian is going to kill you, Claude. I don't think he's quite forgiven you for hiding his music notes last month."

Claude scowled. "I had to try something to get him to stop working. He says his muse has vanished but slaving over those booklets all day isn't going to make it come back. This is the next best thing I can think of aside from locking him up."

Ciel tuned them out as they continued to argue in favor of looking at Sebastian. He was a hairsbreadth shorter than Claude was and had a leaner build. Dark hair framed his face and looked longer than Claude's. They both smiled at the camera, dark sunglasses covering their eyes and ice cream cones in their hands. It looked like they were at a picnic and even though Ciel didn't know much about Sebastian, he couldn't help but feel at ease while looking at the picture.

"He looks like a nice person," he said and passed the phone back to Claude. Attractive as well, but he kept that thought to himself.

Claude accepted it and tucked the phone back into his pocket. "He is. He's the best friend a guy could ask for," he said softly.

Ciel sighed and shook his head. "I can't believe I'm saying this," he started and ran a hand through his hair. "But I'll give him a chance and stay with him."

Both Claude and Ron smiled at him, looking pleased. Ron clapped him on the shoulder. "You won't regret it," he said. "Sebastian has an amazing apartment. Plus, he has this smoking hot maid that cleans his place. I keep telling him to hook me up, but he keeps misplacing my number." He laced his fingers behind his head and let out a disappointed sigh.

"They're not dating," Claude broke in before Ciel could ask. "He's single. And I tell you that not because I'm trying to hook anyone up, but to put your mind at ease. No one likes to hear other people going at it in the middle of the night."

Ciel nodded, grateful for that reassurance. He already felt strange about staying at someone's place when he didn't know them, but hearing them have sex would only make things even more strained for him. "Thanks for that."

Claude grunted and looked at Ron. "Cover for me while I take him to Sebastian's apartment. I won't be gone that long." He turned to Ciel. "Get your bags. I'm sure you're anxious to get out of here and into something more comfortable."

"Yeah," Ciel agreed and followed Claude out of the office. He felt grimy and his stomach still growled, demanding food. He hadn't had any time to eat the bagel Ron brought him but with any luck, he could get some better food at Sebastian's apartment.

"Thank you for this," Claude said as he climbed into the car.

Ciel made a soft noise of agreement and leaned his head against the window. The sun had set already, giving way to the night sky and the airport looked like a tree filled with lights. Planes continued to take off and land as the car moved down the road, and Ciel watched one take off before they left the airport behind.

Silence settled in the car as they sped down the highway and towards the city. Even from a distance, Ciel could see the tall buildings standing opposing in the dark. Their dark shapes remained nothing but shadows in the night with a few lights to help further define them. They looked down at the people and cars below, watching them with open eyes and finding the busy bustle of life interesting.

Silly humans, they seemed to say; rush, rush, rush, that's all you do. And while you rush, we remain here, standing silently but strongly as we watch you run yourselves ragged. Such is the life of a building. We see you, but you do not see us.

The buildings grew closer, tall concrete jungles filled with steel and glass. From their spot on the highway, Ciel could see their tallest points scrape against the night sky. As though the tower antennas at the top wanted to steal the very stars from the skies.

They looked foreboding yet beautiful bathed in darkness, but Ciel still couldn't wait to see them in the daylight. Or in the sunset; backlit by the setting sun and tossing everything into an array of colors.

"Just a little further," Claude said, breaking the silence as they turned off the loop and took the nearest exit.

Ciel nodded and watched the skyline from the window. It didn't shrink as they continued down the new road and Ciel could only imagine what view Sebastian had of the city. Ron had said that he had a good apartment. He never thought that it would include the view as well.

The car came to a stop in front of a long line of apartments and Ciel stared at them in awe. "This is where he lives?" he asked and unclipped his seatbelt, still staring at the buildings.

Claude nodded. "The Arts District. It's close to the symphony hall, so it's easy for him to access the building if he ever needs it." His fingers clenched the steering wheel and he turned to look at Ciel, eyes serious behind thin glasses. "There's one other thing about Sebastian that I didn't tell you."

Ciel tensed and his hand reached for the door handle in case he needed to run for whatever reason. "Another catch?"

"Somewhat," Claude answered as his fingers loosened and his shoulders slumped slightly. He seemed to debate with himself, as though he didn't want to tell Ciel at first before he sighed in resignation. "It's not my place to say but I'm sure you'll figure it out quickly. You're a smart kid."

"Okay," Ciel mumbled, because what else could he say?

Claude leaned back in his seat. "You can change your mind now, if you want. But I promise you though that Sebastian is a good man. He can give you a tour of the city and can get you into places that most people never have access to." He ran a hand through his hair, looking flustered. "But if you would rather not stay with him after you meet him, I'll take you to a hotel of your choosing and I won't hold anything against you."

Ciel gnawed on his lip. He hadn't expected that curveball and he didn't know what to think about it. "Can I meet him first?" he asked. That would make or break things for Ciel.

"Of course," Claude answered and climbed out of the car. "Although I warn you now that he's not going to be happy with me when I tell him what's going on."

"I don't blame him," Ciel said with a small grunt. He followed Claude up the small set of stairs and waited patiently next to him. He scoffed as Claude rang the bell several times. "Is that necessary?"

Claude smirked. "It's how he knows its me."

Ciel nodded but didn't say anything further. He didn't know what to expect and his heart sputtered wildly in his chest. He nearly jumped when the speaker next to the doorbell crackled to life. "Honestly Claude, must you rape my doorbell in that manner?" a deep voice asked and Ciel blinked in surprise at the voice.

A low chuckle left Claude. "Is there any other way? Hurry up and answer the door old man. I'm supposed to be at work right now."

"I should make you stand outside even longer for that comment," Sebastian stated but Ciel heard the lock sliding on the door before it swung open.

He recognized Sebastian instantly from the picture and Ciel shifted slightly next to Claude. Sebastian didn't look at him, didn't even bat an eyelash in his direction, and Ciel felt awkward standing on the porch. By now, he should've noticed that Claude had company and at least acknowledged him, but Sebastian remained focused solely on Claude.

Ciel worried his lip, wondering if he should back out now while he had the chance. If Sebastian treated him this way when Claude was around, how would he treat him after Claude left? Claude never said anything about Sebastian acting rude, but Sebastian's actions felt rather impolite.

"So why did you skip work to come see me, Claude?" Sebastian asked, his arms crossed over his chest as he leaned against the doorframe.

Claude cleared his throat. "I wanted to introduce you to someone," he said and an eyebrow rose slightly. "Sebastian, this is…," Claude trailed off and looked at Ciel, a small frown crossing his lips. "You know, I never asked your name."

"I can't take you anywhere," Sebastian muttered and ran a hand over his face. "You're supposed to be a cop, Claude."

"Seems as though he needs some more training," Ciel quipped and tensed as Sebastian finally turned to look at him. He shuffled his feet, the awkward feeling magnifying as Sebastian's face looked at him but his eyes gazed at a spot well over his head.

Claude hummed. "Lower," he said softly.

Instantly, curious eyes slid down and looked at Ciel. "You're short," Sebastian stated.

Ciel bristled at the words. "Well sorry for being vertically challenged. Not all of us can stand as tall as you two."

Sebastian chuckled and held out his hand. "I apologize, that was out of line for me. I'm Sebastian."

"Ciel," he answered and reached for Sebastian's hand. "It's nice to meet you."

Sebastian had a firm handshake and Ciel gave his approval. His father always said that you could tell a lot about a person by their handshake. Perhaps Sebastian just needed Claude to introduce them before he would acknowledge Ciel. It seemed a bit strange, but it wasn't overly rude as Ciel at first pegged Sebastian.

Their hands fell to the side and Sebastian cocked his head. "You're from England?" he asked. "South England, if I had to guess."

Ciel sputtered and he stared at Sebastian. "I, yes. I lived in England when I was a child but that was years ago. How did you know that? I thought my accent had faded by now after living in The States for so long."

"Sebastian has wonderful hearing," Claude said.

"You have just a minute amount remaining," Sebastian said. "I didn't hear it at first, but I caught it eventually. It's a very nice accent."

Ciel flushed. "Thanks," he mumbled.

Sebastian smiled slightly before turning his attention back to Claude. "So why did you show up on my front porch with someone you just met?" he asked.

"Can we come inside for a bit? I'd rather not stand outside talking when it's much more comfortable inside," Claude stated.

"You just want something to eat," Sebastian accused but stepped to the side regardless, letting them inside. "Take your shoes off, please. Mey-rin just cleaned earlier this afternoon."

Ciel toed his shoes off in the foyer and looked around the large apartment in awe. Ron wasn't kidding when he said that Sebastian had an amazing apartment.

He tore his attention away the spiral staircase as soft tones reached his ears and Ciel glanced at Claude as he followed Sebastian. Sebastian's hand stretched out before him slightly until it bumped against a table and his fingers trailed along the surface of the table with a light touch.

"I don't need your help, Claude," Sebastian said with a sigh as Claude's fingers curled around his arm. "I've done this for years now."

"It eases my mind," Claude answered as they walked side by side. "So what do you have to eat in this place anyway? The kid hasn't eaten yet either."

They came to a stop and Sebastian looked over his shoulder. His eyes focused on a spot somewhere to Ciel's left even though his face pointed in his general direction. "Are you coming, Ciel? You don't have to stay in the foyer."

Ciel nodded numbly as Sebastian turned back around and they started walking again. His body refused to move forward though as his mind struggled to make sense of the situation. He stumbled backwards as a thought crossed his mind and his leg bumped against the nearby coat rack. It wobbled slightly and Ciel reached out to straighten it.

His fingers stopped inches from the tall piece of furniture and Ciel quickly pulled his hand back. He had his suspicion earlier when Sebastian started walking but the object in front of him confirmed his thoughts. The blaring red and white stick stood out in stark contrast to the darker jackets that hung up around it, and Ciel swallowed heavily. Now he knew what the true catch was that Claude remained reluctant to tell him this whole time.

Sebastian was blind.


	2. Opus 2

**A/N: **Onto the next chapter! Thank you everyone for your support so far! I hope y'all like the chapter ^^ Many, many thanks to **socialbutrfly1379 **for being my amazing beta again! She was awesome working on this story :3

**Warnings**: Language

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Kuroshitsuji

* * *

Ciel stared at the red and white stick, feeling a strange emotion well up inside his chest. He didn't know what to make of it and his hand fell back to his side. Fingers curled into a fist and the strongest urge to flee overtook him. He didn't know how to act around a blind person. Were there certain things he shouldn't say or do? Was he supposed to act a particular way?

They had a few blind students on campus where Ciel went to school and he always gave them a wide berth, steering clear and keeping his eyes away from them. Not that he had anything against someone who was blind, but it didn't stop Ciel from feeling awkward around them.

He looked up as footsteps sounded against the wood floor. Claude had a knowing look in his eye as he approached him and Ciel crossed his arms, suddenly feeling defensive.

"You didn't tell me Sebastian was blind."

Claude tugged his glasses off his face. "I didn't think it was my place to say," he said and brought them up to the light, inspecting the specks of dust on the lenses. "Is that going to be a problem?"

Ciel frowned. "I don't know," he said. "I, I don't know how to act around him. I mean, was he always like this or did it happen recently?"

"He was born blind," Claude said.

"That must be horrible," Ciel said and rubbed his arm awkwardly. "He must hate his life."

The statement made Claude laugh and shake his head. He didn't say anything though as he slipped his glasses back on and tilted his head back in the direction Sebastian had vanished. "To him, not being able to see is as natural to him as seeing is to us. It doesn't seem to bother him. Although I know there are times where he wonders what it's like to see things." Claude shifted his weight. "But I've never heard him curse his blindness. At least not aloud."

Ciel nodded slightly. "I suppose so."

Claude hummed and slipped his hands in his pockets. "Is this going to be a problem, Ciel?" he asked again. "You can still back out if you want. I'll just tell Sebastian that something came up and you had to leave."

"I didn't agree to stay with him to become his baby-sitter," Ciel stated, a little more harshly than he meant.

Claude shook his head. "He's been blind since birth, Ciel," he said. "He's learned how to take care of himself to the best of his abilities."

"What about cooking and cleaning?" Ciel asked. His mind still had trouble wrapping around the situation and he blamed it on the late hour added to his already long day.

"Remember the 'smoking hot maid' that Ron mentioned?" Claude asked, his lips pulling down in a slight frown at the description. Ciel nodded. "She lives with Sebastian and helps take care of the things he needs help with. And, it makes us all feel just a bit better to have someone living with Sebastian. Just in case," he finished in a lower tone.

Ciel's arm uncrossed and he let out a sigh. Further back in the apartment, a microwave beeped and Sebastian's voice floated down the short hallway. If Ciel had never found the walking stick, he would've had a hard time guessing that Sebastian couldn't see. Other than the few instances where Sebastian didn't quite look at him, nothing else gave him away.

Even the apartment looked familiar. Everything about it felt cozy and warm. Nothing stuck out and screamed that a blind person lived here. Ciel could hear Sebastian moving about and water running. Not at all what he first expected when he found out Sebastian was blind.

It felt normal.

And in the end, Ciel guessed that Sebastian wasn't any more different than him. Just because he couldn't see didn't make him any less of a human than Claude or himself. Ciel flushed and he glanced at the coat rack. He owed Sebastian an apology.

"I'll give him a chance," Ciel said and looked at Claude. "Provided he doesn't kick me out after you explain what's going on."

Claude chuckled. "Leave that to me. He owes me a few favors and if it boils down to that, I'll pull them on him."

Ciel rolled his eyes and followed Claude further down the hallway. They turned into the kitchen and Ciel's toes curled against the tile floor, the cold seeping through his socks. "Something smells good," he murmured.

"Have a seat," Sebastian said, gesturing to a nearby barstool. "Claude said you haven't eaten yet?"

Ciel nodded, and then remembered that Sebastian couldn't see. That would take some getting used to. "Yeah. It's a long story. I've been at the airport baggage claim since about noon or so."

"I'm sorry to hear that," Sebastian murmured. The microwave went off again and Sebastian pulled the plate from the device. He carried the plate over to the counter and set it in front of Ciel. "Do you mind if I have a few words with Claude?" he asked, looking at Ciel.

"Sure. I'll still be here," he said with a small laugh.

Sebastian nodded. "We'll be right back," he said and started to walk out of the kitchen.

Claude gave Ciel a quick nod, one that Ciel returned, before following Sebastian from the room. Ciel watched them go, knowing what they would talk about. He had seen the confusion in Sebastian's eyes when they first arrived on his doorstep followed by a desire to know what was going on. Whatever happened though, Ciel only hoped that Claude knew what he was doing.

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

The door to Sebastian's bedroom shut and Claude tensed briefly as Sebastian turned around to look at him. Crimson eyes bore into him and Claude knew the look all too well. Sebastian constantly gave it to him growing up and he swallowed. "You wanted to talk?"

Sebastian nodded. "What's going on, Claude?" he asked.

Claude sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "Just hear me out first, Sebastian," he started. "The kid's friend abandoned him at the airport and from what I understand, doesn't even know he's in town. He's in a bit of a bind as you can imagine. He can't stay at the airport hotel until his friend comes to his senses. It's expensive and doesn't give Ciel a chance to see the sights."

Understanding lit up Sebastian's eyes and it was his turn to cross his arms across his chest. "So you want him to stay here," he said. "With me."

"Please?" Claude asked.

Sebastian shook his head. "I don't understand why you would bring him here," he pointed at the ground to emphasis the fact. "And for that matter, what made you suddenly grow a heart and offer to give him a place to stay. Whether it was my place or somewhere else?"

Claude leaned against the wall and held Sebastian's gaze. Even though Sebastian couldn't see, Claude still felt rude and strange if he didn't give Sebastian his full attention whenever they talked. Growing up with him taught Claude to treat Sebastian as any other friend he had. He still gestured and looked Sebastian in the eyes, never minding the fact that he couldn't see the actions.

But Sebastian had always been smart and could pick out when something went missing in a puzzle. He could see straight through Claude's simple explanation and knew that something further lurked behind his words.

"I've always had a heart," he pointed out.

Sebastian snorted. "But not to this degree. You don't exactly reach out for random people you met at the airport. Which, may I point out, you didn't even know Ciel's name until a few minutes ago." His eyebrows furrowed. "So spit it out. What are you really hoping to accomplish?"

Claude crossed the small space between them and carefully reached for Sebastian. His clothes rustled, alerting Sebastian to his close proximity and he gripped Sebastian's shoulder without making him jump. "I've always had a heart," he said again. "Especially when it came to my closest friend. I'm worried about you, Sebastian."

"I can take care of myself, Claude," Sebastian snapped. "I've lived on my own for years now. I don't see what the problem is all of a sudden."

Claude shook his head. "That's not what I'm talking about and you know it." He gestured around the room and Sebastian's eyes followed him as best they could. "You don't leave the apartment anymore and you're constantly hunched over your notes. You're digging your grave by running yourself ragged, and if you don't stop, you're going to break."

Crimson eyes blinked and seemed to harden. "So you decided to recruit someone you just happened to meet at the airport as a way to get me out of the apartment?" He grabbed Claude's arm. "You don't know anything about him, Claude. How do you know he won't steal everything tonight?"

"I was desperate, Sebastian," Claude shouted. "You're my best friend. Do you know what it's like to see your friend slowly wasting away before your eyes because he's stuck in a rut? I can't let you do that to yourself."

"Claude," Sebastian said. "How did you expect this whole thing to work out?"

Claude shrugged. "Simple. He wants to see the famous places around town. The Arts District, the Yards, and just random places downtown. He doesn't want to stay cooped up inside all day long when the city is right there outside his window," he said. "This way, it gets you out of the apartment and gives you company, while Ciel gets to see the city. Everyone wins."

Sebastian ran a hand over his face. "I can't Claude," he said. "My deadline."

"Is killing you," Claude finished. He reached forward and traced the dark bags under Sebastian's eyes. "You've lost weight and you're losing sleep over this. If helping you means bringing in someone I just met an hour ago, then so be it. But I will not sit by and watch you torture yourself over this."

"I'm just having trouble finding my muse again," Sebastian said stubbornly. "It'll come back soon enough."

A snort left Claude's mouth and he stepped back from his friend. His eyes darted over Sebastian's body, taking in the tired slump to his shoulders and the way Sebastian's face looked drawn. He hadn't seen Sebastian look this bad in years, not since his mother passed away. And Claude never wanted to see him look that way again.

"Locking yourself in your apartment and staring at a blank sheet of paper isn't going to make your muse come back," Claude pointed out. He moved across the room and dropped down on the bed. The sheets rustled and Sebastian turned to look at him. "And by denying Ciel this chance, you're ruining his summer vacation."

It wasn't easy to guilt trip Sebastian, but Claude hoped that this ploy would help sway him. All Claude needed was a foot in the door. He already had a suspicion that Sebastian didn't mind Ciel staying with him. He didn't protest that part when Claude brought it up.

Sebastian looked to the side. "How can I trust him?" He frowned. "How do you trust him?"

Claude laughed lightly. "We both have good intuition when it comes to judging people. But from what I learned of him while we talked, I think he's a good kid." He cocked his head. "He seems to have his head on straight at least."

A heavy sigh fell from Sebastian's lips but Claude knew that he wouldn't argue. If Sebastian didn't trust Ciel, he wouldn't have left him alone while they talked. Not only that, Mey-rin would also be around to help keep an eye on him until they learned to trust each other more.

"He can stay here. There's room in the loft upstairs, but I can't take him into town," Sebastian finally said. "Mey-rin can take him into the city and to the Arts District, but I have to stay here."

Amber eyes narrowed and Claude slapped his hands on his thighs before standing up. "I didn't want to have to do this, Sebastian, but you leave me little choice." He clapped Sebastian's shoulder. "If you don't agree to take a break and show Ciel around, I'll move your piano out of the apartment."

Sebastian stared at him for a moment before breaking into laughter. The noise bounced around the room, light and full of mirth. It sounded good to hear Sebastian laugh again and it made Claude smile. He didn't know what Sebastian found so funny and he waited patiently for the laughter to quiet down.

Tears crept into the corners of Sebastian's eyes and he wiped them away, small chuckles still slipped past his lips. "That's a good one, Claude," he said and he shook his head. "It took you almost two hours to get the piano inside the apartment. And that was with help from three other guys."

Claude frowned at the reminder.

"I also distinctly remember you saying that you would never touch it again after that," Sebastian continued. "Furthermore, I'm sure you wouldn't want to take it away, only to turn around and bring it back."

Claude grumbled under his breath. He hated it when Sebastian matched him point for point when they argued something. He crossed his arms over his chest and prepared to bring out his ace in the hole. Being Sebastian's friend for years gave him insight to all of Sebastian's weaknesses. And he knew the biggest one of them all.

"Fine," he said with a shrug. "Then I suppose I'll just take Soot back with me and keep her at my place until Ciel leaves."

It was a low blow, Claude knew that, but as he said before; he was desperate. He knew he hit the target when Sebastian's shoulders tensed and crimson eyes darted around the room. The black cat had been in Sebastian's company for several years now and he loved her fiercely. Taking her away would make Sebastian miserable.

"You're a cruel man, Claude," Sebastian seethed. "You know how much I care for Soot."

Again, Claude shrugged. "I told you, Sebastian, I'm not going to sit by and watch you torture yourself over this anymore. Either let Ciel stay with you and take him into town, or I'll take Soot away for a while." He took a step back, giving Sebastian space. "You need to take a break."

Silence settled throughout the room. Claude breathed carefully though his nose, trying his best not to disturb the stillness as Sebastian pondered his words. They both knew that he would follow through with his threat and the ball now sat in Sebastian's court. What happened next, rested fully on Sebastian's shoulders.

The seconds dragged on and Claude could almost see the gears turning in Sebastian's mind. He would weigh the options, finding any loopholes to wiggle through and still get what he wanted. But Claude had made sure to fool proof this plan. Sebastian wouldn't find a way to escape this ultimatum, and for once, Claude had finally one.

"You owe me," Sebastian finally said.

Claude shook his head. "I think it's the other way around," he teased. "I bet by this time next week, you'll feel so relaxed and carefree that you'll wonder why you didn't listen to me in the first place. You'll say, 'oh, my wonderful and genius friend was right the whole time. He's the best friend a guy could ask for.'"

He grunted when Sebastian backhanded him in the stomach. "You talk too much," Sebastian murmured.

"But you're smiling," Claude said in a singsong voice and he pushed up the corners of Sebastian's lips. "See, right there."

Sebastian batted his hands away but the smile on his face remained. "You're insufferable, you know that. I have no idea why I keep you around."

Claude laughed as he opened the bedroom door. "Because I bring you sweets from the bakery on Main," he answered. "And I helped you move that damnable piano into the living room. Which, may I add, fell on my foot."

"You lived," Sebastian stated and his eyes danced with mirth. "And you drank the whole bottle of rum that the theater gave me for Christmas the previous year."

He waved his hand. "You weren't drinking it, so I put it to good use."

Sebastian grumbled under his breath. "Yeah, by throwing up for hours the next morning."

"Details," Claude said but flushed at the memory. That wasn't his best and shining moment. Trust Sebastian to remember that one. He grunted at the thought and turned around to face Sebastian. He caught a thin wrist – thinner than he remembered and it made Claude frown, but only fueled his desire to get Sebastian out of the apartment – and gave it a light squeeze. "Thank you for this, Sebastian."

A sigh. "I hope you're right about this, Claude."

Claude's frown deepened and he gave Sebastian a one-armed hug. "Of course I'm right," he said and tried his best to ignore the dejected tone in Sebastian's voice. He knew how important the composition was to Sebastian, but it was eating him up inside. He only hoped that this would work in the long run.

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

Ciel looked up as Claude and Sebastian entered the kitchen. He silently read their body language, noting the relaxed shoulders and facial expressions. It seemed as though Claude had come through in the end and had managed to convince Sebastian. He kept himself from sighing in relief, not wanting to draw any attention to himself.

He straightened up as Claude looked in his direction and gave him a thumbs up. "Seems like you have a place to stay," Claude said with a grin. "Sebastian agreed to let you stay and _promised_ to show you around town during your time here." He glared at Sebastian and elbowed him in the side.

Sebastian grunted. "Yes, yes, your emphasis is not lost on me. I have a feeling that you'll check up on me to make sure I keep that promise."

"Thank you," Ciel said softly. "I'm sorry that I'm being a burden." He did feel bad about imposing on Sebastian, but it didn't stop the relief he felt at knowing he would have a place to stay until Alois came to his senses.

"It's not a burden," Sebastian answered quickly. "I have plenty of space and the extra company is nice. Mey-rin doesn't stay here all day so sometimes it gets quiet. I truly don't mind."

Ciel eyed Sebastian. "Are you sure?"

Sebastian nodded and gestured to Claude, who rooted through the pantry in search of a snack. "I'm sure. If anything, I apologize for Claude's actions. He doesn't think before he acts. Something I tried to correct but I fear he's rather un-teachable."

"I heard that," Claude said. "And for that, I'm taking your chips."

"My heart mourns the loss," Sebastian said dryly.

Ciel chuckled and looked back at Sebastian. "If you're sure."

Sebastian hummed and moved closer to the counter. His eyebrows furrowed in thought and Ciel watched as crimson eyes darted between himself and Claude. Ciel still found it odd that Sebastian could pinpoint them exactly now that he knew where they stood. It was a bit unsettling at the same time - knowing that those breath taking garnet eyes could look right at him and seemingly pierce his soul, but never really see him.

"I won't lie," Sebastian said lowly and his eyes focused on him. "I'm struggling with a composition right now and the last thing I want to do is leave the apartment."

"I heard," Ciel said. "Seems like we're both pawns in this game Claude is playing."

A pleasant chuckle left Sebastian's mouth. "I believe we are." He leaned against the counter and laced his fingers together. "However, I gave Claude my word that I would take you into the city and show you around. I might not like the idea now, but that doesn't mean that I won't show you a good time. And who knows, maybe this plan of Claude's will actually work out."

Ciel smiled. "I hope it does. I'm sure this is a stressful time for you."

Sebastian's eyes closed as he laughed under his breath. "You can say that again." He straightened up and turned around to look at Claude. "Don't you have someplace to be? Like work?"

Claude swallowed loudly and looked at his watch. He cursed and crumpled the empty bag in his hands. "I need to run," he said and fixed Sebastian with a stern look. "Remember what we talked about."

Crimson eyes rolled and Sebastian waved his hand. "Yeah, yeah," he murmured. "Now if you don't mind, you're probably making a mess in my kitchen."

"My bags are still in your car," Ciel piped up quickly and stood up. The last thing he needed was Claude to leave with his bags. His body ached for a hot shower and a clean set of clothes. Preferably something soft and comfortable.

"Right," Claude said. "We'll be right back."

Sebastian hummed. "I'll be here," he said matter-of-factly.

Ciel jogged after Claude and slipped his shoes on by the door. The warm night air washed over his body when he stepped outside. Claude popped the trunk and Ciel reached for his small carry-on bag. "Thank you for finding me a place to stay," he murmured.

Claude didn't say anything at first and Ciel wondered if he heard him at all. He set the larger bag on the ground and slammed the trunk shut. "I should say the same as well," he said and mulled over his words. "If you decide after a day or so that you feel awkward around him, give me a call. I won't hold anything against you."

Something rose in Ciel's throat and he had to swallow harshly to force the feeling down. The words remained lodged in his throat though and he could only nod at Claude. He hated that he couldn't tell Claude that he would be fine and that he would get along with Sebastian. But the uncertainty kept him from speaking.

He had never dealt with a blind person before and once Claude left, he was on his own. Despite knowing that Sebastian was still a person, it didn't stop the faint awkward feeling from arising whenever he thought about interacting further with Sebastian.

"I should go back inside before Sebastian wonders what's taking so long," he finally mumbled. He held out his hand. "Thanks again for everything, Claude."

"Take care, Ciel," Claude answered and gave him a firm handshake. His hand fell to the side and he opened the door, sliding inside the car.

Ciel watched him pull away from the curb and head down the road, leaving him alone on the sidewalk. With a sigh, Ciel wheeled his bags to the steps and made his way back to the apartment.

Once inside, the silence of the residence made itself known and the awkward feeling came back in full force. It smashed against him with the strength of a train and Ciel stood uneasily in the foyer. With Claude gone, the mediator between himself and Sebastian had vanished, leaving Ciel to face things alone.

He shut the door and locked it as he toed off his shoes again. "Um, where do you want me to put my bags?" he asked.

"You can bring them upstairs," Sebastian called, his voice echoing down the spiral staircase.

Ciel jumped, not expecting Sebastian to answer from the second floor. He thought Sebastian was still in the kitchen and his mind had trouble wrapping around Sebastian climbing the steps when he couldn't see. A low grunt left his mouth. Of course Sebastian could climb the steps. He had steps in front of his apartment and the world itself had millions of steps. What made inside his apartment any different?

He sighed and started to wrestle his larger bag up the steps. It made a loud racket the whole trip up and Ciel panted for breath by the time he made it to the top of the steps.

"Sounds like you had a little trouble," Sebastian stated and his lips curled into a warm smile. "I probably could've heard you a mile away."

Ciel laughed. "I don't think your stairs like me much." He set his bag to the side and looked around the small loft. "I guess I'm staying here?"

Sebastian nodded. "I know it's not very big, but it gives you privacy that you wouldn't find in the living room. Although I'm afraid we couldn't exactly get a couch up here." His eyes danced. "The staircase isn't exactly the widest as I'm sure you noticed. But we have an air mattress that you can use."

"I noticed," Ciel said with a grin. "And an air mattress is fine. It beats sleeping on the floor."

"I'll get it set up then while you bring up your other bag. Then I'm sure you would like a shower before bed." Sebastian's nose crinkled. "I don't know about you, but I'm always more comfortable in sweat pants or shorts than jeans."

Ciel sighed in relief. "That sounds wonderful. I can't wait to take a hot shower." He sniffed himself. "I think I smell."

Sebastian moved over to a small closet and chuckled lightly. "I won't comment on that one," he teased as he pulled out a box.

"I'll be right back then," Ciel said, choosing not to answer Sebastian. His small carry-on rested by the door still and he grabbed it before shouldering his backpack. The trip back upstairs wasn't any easier and Ciel winced every time his bag hit the metal railing.

He set the bag down heavily when he reached the top, surprised to see the air mattress inflated already. Sebastian stood near the closest again, running his hand over the folded linens. His mouth moved silently and Ciel stood quietly as he watched in awe. He didn't know what Sebastian was doing, but he found the sight incredible for some reason.

He didn't know if it was Sebastian himself that made Ciel watch him so intently or just the situation. Watching Sebastian handle himself as any abled person could made Ciel realize just how independent Sebastian was.

"Do you have any preference for sheet color?" Sebastian asked, breaking Ciel from his trance.

"Blue?" Ciel said, although it came out more as a question than anything else.

To his surprise, Sebastian pulled out a set of blue sheets after running his hand over the linens once more. He sputtered in shock and his face flushed as Sebastian laughed.

"Go ahead, ask your question."

The heat on Ciel's face grew and reached his ears. But his curiosity had peaked and Ciel couldn't stop himself even if he wanted. "How did you know that was the blue sheet?"

"I had Mey-rin sew some identifying tags into the fabric so I knew what was what," Sebastian answered as he shook out the sheet. He pointed to a small square located on the corner of the linen. "See?"

Ciel ran his finger over the marker, feeling the texture under the pad of his finger. It amazed him that Sebastian could feel the small bumps and know exactly what it said. He thought studying Spanish was hard enough, but at least with Spanish he could try to sound out the letters. Bumps though didn't have letters and he didn't know the first place to start.

He made one more pass over the square before lowering his hand. "I can make the bed. It's the least I can do after everything you're already doing for me."

Sebastian nodded and stepped out of the way without a word. Ciel slipped past him, unconsciously holding his breath as he passed. He quickly worked the fitted sheet on the mattress and jumped when Sebastian silently handed him the top sheet. A muttered thanks passed between them as Ciel shook out the sheet and let it fall into place over the mattress.

"I have nothing against you, Ciel," Sebastian said suddenly and Ciel turned around to look at him. He sat perched on the armrest of a small reading chair, eyebrows drawn in deep thought. "Please don't think that."

Ciel stared at him, unable to find the proper words to reassure Sebastian. Saying anything otherwise felt like a lie and Ciel had to admit that he didn't know what Sebastian truly thought about him. He had come barging into his life suddenly – via Claude mind you, Ciel didn't exactly plan this little side trip – and demanded that Sebastian stop whatever he was working on in order to entertain him.

Not exactly the most promising way to start this strange relationship of theirs.

"I know you had nothing to do with this," Sebastian continued, saving Ciel from speaking. "Claude has pestered me for weeks to get out of the apartment. You just happened to be his pawn in his latest attempt."

"But do you really want to stop your work to cater to my whims?" Ciel asked, finding his voice. Sebastian told him earlier that the last thing he wanted was to leave the apartment while he struggled with his composition. That alone made Ciel feel terrible and guilty. "I mean, you're close enough to the city that I could take a bus to where I want to go. You don't have to leave. I promise I won't tell Claude."

Sebastian closed his eyes and leaned back against the wall with more balance and grace than Ciel expected. "I thought about it," he admitted with a weary smile. "But Claude vaguely told me where you want to go and while you were outside with Claude, I realized that I couldn't remember the last time I visited those places myself."

He ran a hand through his hair and continued. "As much as it pains me to say it, Claude is right. However, if you ever tell him I said that, I'll lock you in the basement of the symphony hall. His ego is big enough already." Sebastian shook his head and clasped his hands in front of him. "I know I won't like leaving, but it has nothing to do with you and everything to do with me."

Ciel swallowed and nodded. "I…thanks for that." He nudged the mattress with his foot. "I am really grateful for this. And the last thing I wanted was to make you do something against your will."

Sebastian laughed, the sound deep and rich in Ciel's ears. It put him at ease and helped erase away the uncomfortable feelings that arose occasionally within Ciel. He found that the more time he spent with Sebastian, the more he could look past the blindness that seemed to separate them. It stood like a wall in front of Ciel, thick and unmovable in some parts, and broken in others.

At times like now, he found a broken section of the wall to pass through and see Sebastian. But other times, something held him back and Ciel once again stood on the other side of the wall. It infuriated Ciel to know that the bricks existed on their own accord and he remained powerless to tear them down.

Instead, it left him jumping in an attempt to see over the solid wall. Each jump gave him a fleeting glimpse of Sebastian, but not enough time to reach out and cross the divider. But he could see Sebastian's outstretched hand just on the other side, patiently reaching and waiting for Ciel to take his hand.

It was as Sebastian said earlier. It didn't have anything to do with Sebastian but everything to do with Ciel.

They would each have to overcome their problems that sat before them. Like silent stone gargoyles, they perched on the wall with screaming mouths wide open and sharp fangs bared. Their wings though remained tucked against their cold backs, content where they sat and unwilling to move.

And there they would stay until they tumbled from their perches by Sebastian and Ciel's hands. Only then, when the gargoyles lay scattered and broken on the ground around their feet, would they find a safe passage over the wall.

Blue eyes gazed at the imposing figure that glared down at him. Cold, lifeless eyes held his in an unwavering stare that promised a challenge. One that Ciel would gladly rise to.

"Trust me," Sebastian said, breaking Ciel from his thoughts and the illusion dispelled in front of him. "Claude isn't the only stubborn one. If I didn't want to do something, I wouldn't do it. You're not making me do anything against my will."

"Still," Ciel said and shrugged a shoulder. "Thank you for everything. You didn't have to but you did."

Sebastian made a soft noise and rose from the chair. "It's getting late and I'm sure you want a shower before you get to bed. The bathroom up here is only a half bath, so you'll have to use the bathroom downstairs to shower."

Ciel knelt down in front of his bag. "That's fine," he said. "A shower is a shower."

He gathered his toiletries in his arms along with a change of clothes before following Sebastian back downstairs. It shouldn't have amazed him to see Sebastian handle the stairs with such ease, but it did. Something about the way he moved caught Ciel's eye and he traced over Sebastian's body, admiring his physique.

He quickly tore his eyes away before he could stare for too long. It didn't feel right, no matter how attractive Ciel thought Sebastian looked. He didn't even know his preference. Ciel firmly stopped that train of thought before it could carry him away to a place that he didn't need to think about.

"Mey-rin left earlier today to see a friend for a few days," Sebastian said as they stopped in front of a bathroom. "For now, you can use this one. Once she comes back though, it's probably best if you use my shower. I don't know what she'll have hanging up in there."

Ciel snickered. "I'd rather not walk into that," he said and set his items on the counter. "Bad enough seeing my mother's undergarments whenever I went into their bathroom at home."

Sebastian hummed his agreement. "I'll leave you to your shower."

The door shut behind Ciel, leaving him alone in the bathroom. He wasted little time turning the water on and shedding his clothes. The hot water felt heavenly against his body and Ciel sighed in relief. He washed his hair and took his time scrubbing his body. He felt gritty after traveling and wanted to make sure he cleaned everything before dressing in fresh clothes.

Despite the desire to stay in the hot shower for hours, Ciel didn't want to rack up Sebastian's water bill and he reluctantly turned the water off. Steam curled around the room and Ciel toweled off, feeling far better than he had when he arrived at the apartment. It amazed him what a simple shower could do for his mentality.

He rubbed the towel through his hair, sending a few drops splattering against the counter. Ciel wiped them away and slipped the towel around his neck before getting dressed.

Steam escaped the bathroom when Ciel opened the door and the fading sound of a piano chord filled the air. Ciel blinked and took a step away from the humid bathroom, moving further into the living room. He hadn't heard Sebastian playing while he was in the shower and he drew closer.

"Did I interrupt you?" he asked.

Sebastian shook his head. "I wasn't really playing anything. Just pecking at a few notes to hear them sing." he admitted. "I like the feel of the keys. Smooth and hard, each one unique."

Ciel's lips tilted up in a faint smile. "I know what you mean." Sebastian turned to look at him, confusion swimming in crimson eyes. "I played the cello when I was younger. I stopped a few years ago. I didn't have time to practice in between working and school."

"I'm sorry to hear that," Sebastian said. "I like composing for the cello almost as much as I do the piano."

Ciel didn't say anything and simply watched as Sebastian traced the keys with his fingers. He seemed lost in a trance and Ciel wondered how many sleepless nights he sat in front of the piano, feeling the keys but never connecting the notes. To see the bars in his mind but have them remain blank. White, empty space with mocking thin lines.

He reached forward but jerked his hand away at the last minute. It felt wrong to touch the piano without Sebastian's permission. Ciel wouldn't like it if anyone touched his cello whenever they wanted. It was only fair that Ciel offer the same respect to Sebastian.

"You'll figure it out," he said instead.

Sebastian nodded and stood up, closing the top on the piano. "One can only hope," he said with a forced smile.

It made Ciel frown and he could see the troubles etched into Sebastian's face. Seeing the tired lines and shadowed marks under his eyes, Ciel understood why Claude was so desperate to get Sebastian away from his work. It would quickly devour him from the inside if he stayed much longer. And even though Ciel barely knew Sebastian, he didn't want to see him fall.

Not when so much life remained within him. Ciel had seen the brief glimpses of it, watching the interactions between Claude and Sebastian earlier in the evening. And had heard it in Sebastian's laughter.

His drive and inspiration still flickered with life, the glowing embers a soft orangish-red color in the darkened night. They hadn't gone out yet, but all it would take was one strong gust of wind to suck the remaining color away. Yet, that same gust could also breathe life back into the embers. It all depended on how it blew.

With any luck, Ciel could help it do the latter and not the former.

"It will," he said with determination. "Taking a break isn't the same as quitting. No matter what you may think."

Sebastian's lips twitched and the tension in his shoulders slipped away. "I know. I just forget that at times." He yawned and touched the top of the piano. "Seeing as I have company, I probably shouldn't practice at night anymore."

"Your company would appreciate that," Ciel quipped and stretched his arms above his head. "Especially as he's going to bed now."

"Duly noted," Sebastian answered and his hand slipped away from the piano. "Sleep well, Ciel."

Ciel nodded. "You too."

He made his way back upstairs and set his dirty clothes next to his bag. The light downstairs went off and Ciel fumbled for the light switch on the nearby lamp. It clicked on and it provided enough light to illuminate the loft. A yawn escaped his mouth and Ciel grabbed his toothbrush so he could finish getting ready for bed.

His body ached for the soft mattress and he couldn't wait to lay down. He turned the bathroom light off and plugged his phone charger in, glancing at his phone as it started to charge. The time greeted him on the screen, displaying the simple background behind that.

An annoyed scowl crossed his face and Ciel angrily hit the switch for the light. He crawled under the covers, his frustration temporarily subsiding at the feeling of soft fabric against his skin. It came back though when he reached for his phone and pushed a button.

Ciel glared at the device, the screen illuminating the small loft. He didn't expect Alois to call him back and he rolled onto his stomach. Downstairs, something jingled softly but Ciel didn't pay it any attention. More pressing matters weighed on his mind.

He unlocked the phone and brought up his text messages. The cursor blinked innocently and Ciel stared at it a bit longer before jabbing at the keys. The words flowed easily - short, simple, and to the point.

'_Call me when you wake up.'_

It sent with a soft noise and Ciel placed the phone on the floor before rolling onto his side again. The tinkling noise sounded again and Ciel's eyebrows furrowed slightly before silence swept over the apartment once more. He sighed and closed his eyes, allowing the hands of sleep to carry him away to a sea of dreams.


	3. Opus 3

**A/N**: Thank you everyone for your wonderful support! Many, many thanks to**socialbutrfly1379 **for being my amazing beta again! She was awesome working on this story :3

**Warnings**: Language

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Kuroshitsuji

* * *

Sunlight streamed through the loft and Ciel rolled over, away from the bright light. His eyebrows furrowed and his nose tickled, a sneeze threatening to escape his mouth. He quelled the action last minute and buried his face into the pillow. Shoulders relaxed and the faint trickles of sleep began to brush against Ciel's mind again.

They lured him into the soft embrace of a dreamland and Ciel happily answered the call. His body protested the thought of waking and it relaxed further into the bed. He pulled the blanket up higher around his shoulders, feeling it resist slightly. Something held the fabric down next to his shoulder.

Ciel frowned and tugged harder, upsetting the weight. Something jingled and then hit the ground with a soft thump. Ciel pointedly ignored it. He would find the cause when he woke up in a few hours. It was too early for this, his mind concluded.

The noise sounded again, like a small bell in Ciel's ears, before the mattress dipped next to his waist. It continued to move, slowly growing closer to his shoulder again and Ciel squeezed his eyes shut. "Go away," he mumbled.

It stopped and Ciel relaxed once more, assuming that the weight went away – whatever it was. He couldn't bring himself to care, not when precious sleep lingered just within his grasp.

His eyes flew open though when something hard and furry bumped itself against his cheek. Ciel blinked several times, struggling to focus on his surroundings after waking so quickly. It took him a few seconds before his vision cleared and he looked across the span of his pillow, curious eyes gazing back at him.

Ciel's heart seemed to freeze in his chest and he gripped the blanket tighter. His breath caught, a sharp inhale that sent him coughing as his throat was dry and scratchy after a peaceful night sleep. He coughed several times before turning his attention back to the thing that had startled him in the first place.

A black cat stared back at him with wide eyes and a tail flicked at him. "You," Ciel started and the cat simply purred loudly before bumping its head against his arm. "You almost killed me."

The cat simply mewed at him, looking smug. It moved forward, shifting closer to his lap and the small bell on its collar rang slightly. Ciel flicked it, suddenly understanding what the noise was that he kept hearing last night and this morning. Figured Sebastian would have a cat and Ciel shook his head at the irony of it.

"So not only did you try to kill me," Ciel grumbled and rubbed at his nose. "You also woke me up this morning by almost making me sneeze."

The cat continued to purr, its body reverberating and Ciel sniffed. He could feel his starting to water and his nose itched again. A harsh sneeze passed through his lips and the animal bolted from his lap. The black tail puffed up and slitted eyes darted around the room, searching for the source of the noise.

Ciel laughed and pulled the blankets tighter around his body. "Serves you right," he said and sneezed again.

From downstairs, a soft 'bless you' floated into the loft and Ciel glanced over his shoulder, as though he expected to find Sebastian standing behind him. The only thing that greeted him was the open space that looked out over the first floor. He stood up and made his way over to the area; stumbling slightly over the mess of sheets and blankets that pooled around his feet.

He peeked over the wall and looked down into the living room. Sebastian sat on one of the couches, drinking something while he listened to the news. His hair stuck up in several places, a somewhat messy but endearing bed head in Ciel's opinion, and he still wore what looked like his pajamas.

The faint smell of toast wafted through the apartment and Ciel's stomach growled at the scent. He looked around for a clock and found one mounted on the wall. Its face proclaimed the time as nine-thirty and Ciel ran a hand through his messy hair. "Didn't think it was that late," he murmured and made his way back to the bed.

Ciel looked down, frowning at the cat that sat in the nest of sheets. He would have to shake them out later on or he would never get any sleep tonight. He reached for the blankets and tugged on them, sending the animal scampering away from him. It sat at the top of the steps and watched him as he folded the blankets.

Even though Ciel doubted that anyone would come upstairs to the loft area, he didn't want to leave it a cluttered mess. The least he could do was keep the place clean after Sebastian let him stay.

He didn't bother to change before he went downstairs. If Sebastian felt comfortable enough to lounge around the apartment in his sleepwear, Ciel would follow his lead. The black cat trailed at his feet, crying loudly as he walked into the living room. Sebastian looked up at the noise and set his drink down.

"There you are," Sebastian said and patted the spot next to him. "I wondered where you ran off to this morning."

Before Ciel could question what Sebastian was talking about, the cat darted forward. It jumped neatly onto the spot next to Sebastian and crawled into his lap. A warm smile crossed Sebastian's lips as he rubbed the small ears and murmured softly to the animal. Ciel couldn't make out the words but he could feel the adoration between the two.

It showed plain as day on Sebastian's face and the cat's body practically shook with its loud purring. It kept butting its head underneath Sebastian's chin and nuzzling his cheek.

"You didn't tell me you had a cat," Ciel finally spoke and Sebastian startled slightly. A touch of red brushed across his cheeks and Ciel winced. "Sorry," he murmured.

"I didn't hear you come down," Sebastian said, the red fading. "Soot was rather vocal this morning and I didn't hear your footsteps over her."

Ciel stepped into the living room and sat down on the other couch. His eyes flickered briefly to the tall windows that let in the morning light and then to the television playing softly in the background. "She found me this morning," he admitted and turned his attention back Sebastian. "That's why I started sneezing."

Sebastian winced. "You're allergic to cats," he clarified and flipped Soot over onto her back. He ran his hand down her front and black paws wrapped around his arm. Fingers tickled underneath her chin and Soot wiggled on his lap.

"It was much worse when I was younger," Ciel said and shrugged. "I can handle them better now. Usually I just start sneezing and my nose runs."

Crimson eyes glanced down at Soot. "I'll make sure she stays out of the loft during your stay," he said. "No need to make you miserable because your allergies are acting up. Although I'm still surprised she sought you out. Usually she stays with me in the morning until I wake up."

Ciel hummed. "I think she just wanted to know who I was. Probably trying to decide if I'm a friend or not."

"If that's the case, I'd say you passed the test," Sebastian said and stood up. Soot jumped to the floor and sat patiently next to his feet, looking up at him expectantly. He looked back at her. "Let's get you two breakfast."

"How do you figure I passed the test?"

Sebastian chuckled. "She didn't maim you." He moved into the kitchen. "When she first met Ron, she kept attacking his feet whenever he tried to walk. Ended up constantly tripping him and for the longest time, he refused to set foot inside the apartment."

Ciel smirked at the thought of Soot attacking Ron. The fact that she was smaller than he was only made the mental image even funnier. "I'm glad that I'm on her good side then," he said and followed Sebastian into the kitchen.

"She's a sweet girl," Sebastian said and reached into the pantry for the bag of cat food. "What would you like to eat?"

"I'm good with anything," Ciel answered. "I'm not really picky."

Sebastian hummed. "You're not helpful," he teased. "Do you like French Toast?"

Ciel nodded. "French Toast is good. Although waffles are better." He paused, remembering Sebastian's condition. "But ah, cereal is okay. You don't need to worry about cooking for me." Claude had said that Mey-rin handled the cooking and Ciel didn't want to put Sebastian on the spot. He already startled him this morning.

Sebastian didn't say anything as he opened the refrigerator door and went straight for the eggs. He pulled out two eggs, setting them on the counter before reaching for the milk. The door shut and Sebastian grabbed a bowl from the shelf above the counter. With quick efficiency, he cracked the eggs into the bowl and poured in some milk.

"My mother taught me this recipe," Sebastian said as he stirred the mix with a whisk. He paused briefly to sprinkle some spices into the liquid and then reached over to plug in what looked like a small grill.

He opened the lid, the noise making Ciel jump and his muscles tensed. He didn't like the idea of Sebastian standing so close to something hot. One wrong move and he could easily burn himself. Granted, that could happen for anyone, but the chance increased with Sebastian's lack of vision.

"Do you want me to do that?" he asked, the steady press of unease making itself known again.

Sebastian shook his head. "I'm fine, thanks."

Ciel fell silent and tried his best to remain standing still. The kitchen felt stifling and even Soot sat quietly next to her bowl, her eyes darting between them. He didn't know what to say and a part of Ciel felt that Sebastian wanted to prove a point to him. To show that just because he couldn't see didn't mean that he was inept.

The thought made him shift uncomfortably. He didn't think Sebastian was wholly inept, just that he couldn't do most things that everyone else could do. His mind had trouble wrapping around the thought of Sebastian cooking, and even more trouble accepting that Sebastian could take care of himself to such an extent.

But the way Sebastian moved around the kitchen and handled the grill eased almost any doubt in Ciel's mind. Even if he couldn't believe what he saw in front of him.

The pieces of bread sizzled on the grill as Sebastian cooked them, skillfully shuffling them around so they wouldn't burn. His hands remained steady and sure, and they spoke of confidence that even Ciel didn't feel when cooking. Insightfulness hit Ciel again, making him realize that if he didn't know about Sebastian, he would never once look at him and know he was blind.

He held the same level of confidence as any able seeing person and moved about with self-assuredness. Long fingers handled the whisk with ease as they whipped up another batch of French toast mix and in what seemed like no time at all, a fresh stack of French toast sat in front of him.

Cinnamon and other spices assaulted Ciel's nose and he inhaled deeply. The aroma made his stomach growl and Ciel realized how hungry he was for the first time that morning. Despite the late dinner last night, his stomach still rumbled in its demand for food.

"Thank you," Ciel said as Sebastian set butter and syrup in front of him. "It smells amazing."

"What would you like to drink?"

Ciel wiped the butter off the knife and set it down. "Do you have tea by any chance?" he asked hesitantly. He still felt uncomfortable with Sebastian around the grill, or anything boiling hot for that matter.

Sebastian shook his head. "I'm afraid I don't, but we can pick some up today."

"It's fine," Ciel stated quickly. "I can just have something else."

Crimson eyes narrowed slightly and Ciel swallowed. He had a feeling that Sebastian understood the thoughts racing through his mind and he suddenly felt like a deer in the headlights.

"What do you usually drink in the morning?" Sebastian asked, his voice eerily calm. But if Ciel listened close enough, he could hear a strained undertone to his words.

"Tea or coffee," Ciel answered. "It depends on my mood or how tired I am."

Sebastian nodded but his eyes didn't quite lose the hard edge to them. "I have a coffee maker along with a hot water dispenser. It's not a problem for me to handle or be around hot things."

Ciel flinched at the tone and for once, was glad that Sebastian couldn't see him. The words stung and Ciel felt frustrated with not just himself but Sebastian as well. He couldn't help that he had trouble adjusting to and understanding what Sebastian could or couldn't do. He didn't know Sebastian, let alone another blind person. Ciel could only go on what he thought was right.

"Thanks," he said. "I'll pick up some tea later today then. I can drink it anytime during the day. My friend always teases me for it. But I could go for some milk right now."

The edge in Sebastian's eyes eased and the corners of his lips quirked ever so slightly. "That I have," he said and moved over to the refrigerator. He pulled out the container, along with a smaller carton of juice.

Ciel wisely kept his mouth shut as Sebastian poured the drinks and only opened it to thank Sebastian for the glass. Sebastian placed the drinks back on the shelves and reached for his own glass.

Silence settled in the kitchen and eventually, Soot padded over to Sebastian, entwining herself around his ankles. Ciel's nose crinkled but he didn't sneeze, and he counted that as a victory. Sebastian vanished from sight as he bent down to pet her and Ciel shoved a piece of French toast into his mouth. The taste exploded on his tongue and he hummed his approval.

"These are really good," he said and Sebastian's head popped back into view. "You said your mother taught you?"

Sebastian nodded. "She liked to cook and was forever trying to teach me. I like to think that some of her expertise passed off to me," he said with a laugh.

"I think it did," Ciel said and took another bite. He didn't add that it wasn't the delicious taste that caught him off guard, but rather the fact that someone who couldn't see had made something so appetizing.

"Thank you," Sebastian said with a soft smile and the bell on Soot's collar rang as she left the room. "What did you want to do today?" he asked as he cradled the glass in between his hands. Small beads of condensation clung to the sides and a few trickled down the glossy surface to collect on his fingers.

"I don't know," Ciel answered honestly. "My friend and I only talked about the places we wanted to visit, but never planned anything further."

Sebastian nodded. "Let's start with that then. Where did you want to go?"

Ciel traced a random pattern on the surface of the table. "I wanted to see the downtown area and the Art's District. I've heard the art museum is interesting and worth seeing. And I had hoped to see The Yards, preferably during a drive." He looked back up at Sebastian. "The pictures look really amazing."

"We can go downtown today," Sebastian said and pushed away from the counter. "The Yards though will have to wait until next week, I'm afraid. I don't have a way to get us out there and I would rather not take a taxi all that way."

"That's fine," Ciel answered. "I'm not in any rush. I still haven't heard from my friend. He's probably still sleeping off his hangover." A quick look at the digital clock on the stove showed that it was ten. Knowing Alois, he wouldn't call anytime soon. At least not until noon or later.

Sebastian moved over to the sink and set the cup down to wash it. "It's probably best to head out in a little bit. The stores will have just opened an hour or so ago and it's still just before the lunch rush." He reached down to touch his pants and then moved back up to turn the water off. "I just need to change first and then we can leave."

Ciel stood up and carried the dishes over to the sink. "I need to change as well," he said and let Sebastian handle the washing.

"In about fifteen minutes or so?"

"Sounds good," Ciel answered and glanced at Sebastian. "Are you sure I can't help any? I feel bad that I'm making you do all this work."

Sebastian shook his head. "You're my guest," he said firmly before his voice softened. "But thank you for offering."

Ciel nodded and watched Sebastian for a few more seconds before stepping around him. "I'm going to go change really quick then. Thanks for breakfast. It was delicious. And I'm sorry about this morning."

He hurried out of the kitchen before Sebastian could reply and made his way up to the loft, breakfast sitting heavily in his stomach. He genuinely felt bad about thinking of Sebastian as an invalid but he didn't think them on purpose. More than anything, he had only thought about making things easier for Sebastian.

A small part of Ciel knew that blind people could take care of themselves, but the larger part remained adamant that Sebastian needed help with almost everything. It refused to let him remember that Sebastian had been taking care of himself for almost all his life, with probably a limited amount of help from other people.

In retrospect, Sebastian could probably handle himself and his life far better than Ciel could ever hope to handle his own life. Furthermore, Sebastian had already proved to him on several occasions that he knew how to take care of himself. He had a job – a rather successful one if the apartment was any indication of his income and that was more than Ciel could say about his current job status – he took care of a pet with ease and Sebastian seemed genuinely happy.

Who was Ciel to handle Sebastian with kids' gloves? They were both adults and Ciel knew well enough that just because society thought one thing, it didn't mean that they were right. Ciel was walking proof of that. He flushed at the reminder.

He sighed heavily as he ran his fingers through his hair, freeing it of any tangles and smoothing it down. It looked as though knocking down the wall in front of him would take longer than Ciel thought. And it would apparently require a heavier hand.

After a quick check of his appearance in the mirror, Ciel grabbed his phone – still no call from Alois but he didn't expect anything this early in the morning – and wallet. He found Sebastian waiting for him in the foyer and mumbled an apology for making him wait as he slipped his shoes on. His eyes flickered over Sebastian, glancing at his clothes.

They matched and looked good on Sebastian's body. If Ciel were honest, he would admit that he was a bit worried about Sebastian dressing himself. But he quickly stamped out the thoughts before they could take root and firmly reminded himself that Sebastian wasn't a child.

"We can catch the bus and it'll take us further downtown," Sebastian said as they stepped outside. He locked the door and made his way down the steps. "I'm on the edge of the Arts District. The main attractions are a short ride from here." He hesitated. "And I want to apologize as well for my actions this morning."

Ciel blinked, not expecting the sudden apology.

"I forget at times that not everyone feels comfortable with my blindness," Sebastian explained. "I get frustrated when they don't bother to think that I can take care of myself that I forget they probably feel as frustrated as me."

"It's fine," Ciel said and rubbed his arm, feeling a bit awkward. While he appreciated the apology, it only served to remind Ciel of how he had acted and forced him to face his shortcomings, even though he knew that wasn't Sebastian's intention. "Shall we?" he asked and dispelled the troubling thoughts from his mind.

Sebastian nodded. He slipped on dark sunglasses, ones that Ciel recognized from the picture he first saw of Sebastian, and Ciel couldn't help but stare at them. They looked good on Sebastian, and Ciel found himself staring at Sebastian's features a little more. He truly was attractive despite being blind. Ciel cursed under his breath. He doubted Sebastian swung that way.

"You have a question," Sebastian said, amusement present in his voice.

"Do you really need those?" Ciel blurted out. He couldn't help but wonder if the stereotype was true.

Sebastian chuckled. "I go without them at times. But Claude said they make me look, how did he say it? Ah yes, mysterious and that it adds to my appeal." He reached up to touch the glasses. "Why? Do they look strange?"

Ciel shook his head. "No, they're fine. They really do make you look intriguing."

"That's a far better word than mysterious," Sebastian said with a laugh as they started walking.

"So where are we going first?" Ciel asked as he walked next to Sebastian, the long white cane sweeping back and forth in a controlled motion. He tried his best not to watch the cane and instead took in their surroundings. From the tall trees that lined the sidewalks and hung over into the streets, to the flowers that sat at their bases.

They stopped at a crosswalk. "The art museum is the closest to the first bus stop. From there, we can take a tour of the district itself. The architecture is beautiful."

Ciel couldn't stop himself. "How do you know that?" he asked softly.

Sebastian smiled and glanced up, looking at the morning sun. "I have many friends throughout the city. My reach is long and wide," he said. "One of them knew an architect and we were able to get the city to commission him to make a model of the district. With the model, I could feel the shapes and details of the buildings they follow on the tour. I let my imagination fill in the blanks after that. In my mind, it's very beautiful."

The light changed for them to cross and they started walking again. Sebastian continued. "It's on display now at the center where they host the tours and subsequently, that little project helped launch his career."

"Sounds like the architect is in your debt," Ciel said as they came to a stop in front of the bus stop.

Sebastian chuckled. "I get a rather lavish gift every Christmas as thanks from him. Although I feel as though I'm in his debt for all that he did for me." He glanced in the direction of traffic. "The architecture is one of the things the Arts District is famous for, amongst the museums and other things. I know it's more history related and you didn't mention wanting to visit the Historical District, but I would still recommend seeing it."

Ciel shook his head. "I want to see it," he said adamantly. "Alois and I never planned to visit the Historical District even though I wanted to see it. He said it was boring and a horrible place to meet women. But apparently the Arts District meets his approval."

A snort fell from Sebastian's mouth and he looked as though he wanted to say something but thought better of it. "If it doesn't bother you then, we can go to the Historical District tomorrow."

"That sounds great," Ciel said as the bus pulled up to the stop. "I like history, even though my friend can't understand why. He used to like it, but I guess in the face of his new roommates, it's not cool enough anymore."

"You have to like history if you want to learn from it," Sebastian murmured as they climbed onto the bus. It wasn't crowded and they took a seat near the front.

It was a short ride and within a few minutes, the bus came to another stop and they exited. The museum stood tall and proud amidst the even taller skyscrapers and Ciel marveled at the beauty of it. A tasteful water fountain sat near the entrance, the bubbling sounds soothing in Ciel's ears and he started forward.

"Wow," he breathed as they drew closer and he could see smaller statues sat scattered throughout the modest sized lawn. "Can we go inside?"

Sebastian laughed, the sound light and cheerful to Ciel. "Of course," he said and started for the steps. "I believe it's time that I upheld the promise to show you a good time."

Ciel cocked his head and hurried after Sebastian. For someone who couldn't see, Sebastian was fast on his feet. "What do you mean?"

"You'll see," Sebastian said and winked at him over his shoulder.

The simple action made Ciel's heart pound against his chest and he sucked in a deep breath in an attempt to calm it down. He could feel his face heating up and Ciel trembled slightly. Damn Sebastian for making him feel this way. He took another breath and decided to blame it on the short sprint he did to catch up with Sebastian.

That helped settle his nerves, if only slightly.

They entered the museum and cool air rushed over Ciel's skin. He looked around, taking in the interior architecture as Sebastian moved over to the ticket booth. A pang of regret jabbed at Ciel as he looked at the prices. It wasn't that they were overly expensive, but he still felt it unfair that Sebastian would have to pay admission when he couldn't see any of the pieces on display.

He sidled up to Sebastian's side, just missing the conversation. Sebastian turned to look at him and gestured for him to follow. "We have a special guide," he said.

Ciel didn't have much time to ponder Sebastian's words as a door next to the ticket counter opened and someone called Sebastian's name. A woman with light grey hair walked over to them and tossed her arms around his shoulder. "Sebastian Michaelis," she said and jabbed a finger in his chest. "I haven't seen hide nor hair of you in, what, three months and now you show up all willy nilly looking for a tour?" She clicked her tongue.

"Good to see you too, Victoria," Sebastian said with a warm smile. "I'm sorry I worried you."

She scoffed. "I wasn't worried," she said but her tone and face gave her away. Ciel could easily see the relief in her eyes and he wondered about their relationship. He stiffened when her sharp eyes found him and a smug smirk crossed her face. "Who is this?"

Sebastian glanced at her. "This is Ciel. He's actually why I'm here today. So you can thank him, and Claude, for my sudden reappearance."

Her smirk grew and Ciel felt uncomfortable at the predatory look in her eyes. "So this is why you haven't shown yourself in the past few months," she said and turned her attention back to Sebastian. "You didn't tell me you found yourself a boyfriend."

A strange expression crossed Sebastian's face, a curious mix of wistfulness and longing, and he quickly shook his head. "He's not my boyfriend," he said. "I just met him the other day, actually. Claude found him at the airport after a mix up with the friend he's staying with and decided to use him as a means to get me out of the apartment."

"Pity," Victoria said and clicked her tongue again.

"You're gay?" Ciel sputtered, his mind struggling to keep up. Too much had happened to his exhausted brain in just a few short hours and Ciel could feel his world tilting. He couldn't decide if the fates liked him or hated him right now.

He straightened when Victoria glared at him, eyes piercing. "Do you have a problem with that?" she snapped.

Ciel held his hands up in front of him, as a means of self-defense. "No," he said quickly. "No. I have nothing against anyone who likes the same sex," he said honestly. It would make him a hypocrite if he did but something in Victoria's eyes kept him from adding that piece of information. And a further part of him remained confused.

He would be lying if he said Sebastian wasn't attractive. But the wall that stood between them kept Ciel from acting and it left him cold on the other side. Could he be attracted to someone who was blind?

"Forgive Victoria," Sebastian said, scattering his thoughts. "She's rather protective of me at times." He gave her a teasing smile.

She returned the gesture and patted his cheek. "Just looking out for you," she said and gave a dreamy sigh. "If only you were a woman. I'd snatch you up in a heartbeat. Sadly that thing between your legs doesn't do anything for me and keeps me from doing that."

Sebastian laughed and Ciel had a feeling this was a familiar conversation between them. "I could say the same things about you," he joked.

Victoria grinned and turned her attention to both of them. "You should bring him to Oak Lawn, Sebastian." Her eyes danced with something Ciel couldn't place and he felt a chill race up his spine. "You haven't been in ages and I have a feeling Ciel here would have fun. Plus, I happened to hear that Pluto misses you. He whined to me the other day about how you never visit anymore."

"For obvious reasons, horny bastard," Sebastian mumbled under his breath. He cleared his throat. "We'll talk about this later, Victoria. I promised to show Ciel around and he wanted to see the museum. And you're the best I know when it comes to showing people around the place."

"You flatter me," she said and gestured to the entrance. "But since you asked, who am I to deny you? Come this way and we'll get started. We have a new showcase that just opened the other day featuring art from a private collection. You'll love it."

She walked off and they followed at much more subdued pace. Ciel felt exhausted after dealing with her for a short period and he wondered how Sebastian handled her. He glanced at him. "How did you two meet?"

Sebastian chuckled. "She found me at the symphony hall during one of the performances. She's an artist and needed some music for an upcoming showcase. We've stayed good friends ever since." He tilted his head in her direction. "She's part of my…extended family, if you will. If Claude is my older, protective brother, then Victoria is the mother figure."

Ciel laughed. "Sounds like you have good friends here."

"They're wonderful people," Sebastian said softly as they came to a stop in front of a piece of artwork. "It was her friend who was the architect that made the models for me."

Ciel made a soft noise of awe. He had his doubts about Sebastian's connections, but Sebastian was quickly proving him wrong. "One more question," he said quietly as Victoria led them to another piece. "What's Oak Lawn?"

Sebastian shook his head. "I'll tell you later," he said and Ciel grumbled but focused on the next piece. It was why they were at the museum after all.

The minutes bled together and Ciel lost himself in the color and designs around him. They surrounded around him in a whirlwind that threatened to overwhelm his mind but he welcomed the feeling. Art remained something that he could appreciate. With its non-linear rules and expressions that caught his eyes, it helped keep his life off balance despite the parts that tried to keep it in a fixed line.

By the time they finished with the tour, Ciel's feet ached and he yearned to drop into the nearest chair. Victoria looked perfectly fine and ready to continue, but even Sebastian looked a little fatigued. Ciel chalked it up to the fact that they both sat down to do their work, Sebastian at the piano and Ciel at a desk.

They came to a stop near the entrance, having ventured outside to see the sculptures and statues. The fountain bubbled and gurgled quietly, drowning out the murmur of the people passing further down on the sidewalk. Ciel's stomach protested slightly and he looked at his phone, checking the time. It was a little after noon, meaning they had spent around two hours inside the museum.

No wonder his feet hurt. At least he would sleep well tonight. Ciel's body still protested traveling yesterday and after the architecture tour, he knew it wouldn't want to do anything else. Right now, all he wanted was something to eat before they did anything else.

He waited patiently as Sebastian thanked Victoria for showing them around. A smile still stretched across her face and she gave him a one-arm hug before turning her attention to him. Ciel tried his best not to tense as she stuck out her hand and he eyed it warily as he reached out to shake her hand.

"It was nice to meet you, Ciel," she said. "I hope you had a good time."

"I did," Ciel answered honestly. "Thank you for taking us around."

She hummed and their hands dropped to the side. "Not a problem. You two have fun during your stay with Sebastian." Her smile grew wider. "Lots of fun."

Ciel flushed hotly at the implication in her tone and he mumbled a reply. Next to him, Sebastian said his final goodbye and they made their way down the steps. "She was interesting," he said finally.

Sebastian chuckled. "She is," he said. "Did you still want to go on the tour? I know Victoria had us running around for quite a while. We can always push that back for another day."

"It's fine," Ciel said as he shook his head. "I just need something to eat before I go on another long walk," he said with a laugh.

"I agree," Sebastian murmured. "There are several shops along this road, if I remember correctly. Go ahead and pick something. It'll feel good to sit after standing for so long."

Ciel nodded his agreement and scanned the area for the restaurants Sebastian mentioned. "Sandwiches sound good?" he asked, spotting a quaint looking shop across the road. Sebastian nodded as Ciel's phone started to vibrate in his pocket. "Hold on," he said and fished it out.

A quick look at the caller ID showed it as Alois. Ciel glanced at Sebastian who waited patiently next to the gardens that lined the sidewalk. "Go ahead," he said and waved a hand as he sat down on the low wall. "I have nothing against sitting for a few minutes."

"Thanks," Ciel said and stepped away a few paces to answer the phone. "Hello?"

"Hey, Ciel," Alois said and his voice tired. "You said to call when I woke up?"

Ciel sighed. "You just woke up?"

Alois shuffled around. "Yeah. Last night's party was awesome but my head is killing me now. I had to skip class but I'll make it up and get the notes from someone tomorrow." He laughed and Ciel heard him take a drink of something. "So what's up? You asked me to call?"

"What do you mean you had to skip class?" Ciel asked tensely. "You finished classes a few weeks ago."

"Ah yeah," Alois grunted. "I didn't pass one of my classes so I had to take it again during the summer. But it'll finish before you get here."

Ciel ran a hand over his face while his other hand clutched the phone tightly. "Alois, I'm already here. I arrived last night."

Silence stretched over the phone and Ciel could feel his patience quickly stretching thin. "You're joking right, Ciel?" Alois asked. "You're coming down in July. You know, next month."

"You said I could come down in June and when I bought my tickets, you said you would keep those two months clear for us," Ciel said as calmly as he could. "I even called you last night to tell you I had arrived but you were too drunk off your ass to even hold the phone."

"Shit, I thought that was a dream," Alois cursed and Ciel gave the ground a bitter smile. He expected that answer and somehow it didn't surprise him. "Where are you now?"

Ciel scowled. "Currently I'm in front of the art museum. I'm not letting you ruin this trip, Alois. I paid a lot for those tickets and this is my summer vacation. I don't want to spend it stuck in a hotel while I wait for you to come to your senses."

Alois groaned. "Not so loud. My head is pounding right now."

"Fuck your head," Ciel spat and Sebastian's head snapped in his direction at his exclamation. Ciel gave him a tense smile and then focused on Alois again. "What are we doing about this mess, Alois?"

"I don't know. I'm in class for the rest of the month," Alois said and sighed loudly. "You could always stay at the apartment while I'm gone."

Ciel frowned. "I'll pass," he said dryly. Spending a month in the apartment with no one but Alois's roommates was not high on his priority list. Especially when he didn't like them. And Ciel had a feeling that they didn't like him too much either. Not only that, but it was a month that Ciel would miss seeing the sights.

Alois made an unhappy noise. "I don't know what else to do. I need this class. It's a prerequisite for another class I'm taking in the fall. Without that, I'm screwed."

"I'll stay where I'm at," Ciel said and his eyes flickered to Sebastian. "I found a good place to stay for now."

"Are you sure?"

"Positive."

Alois hummed and someone shouted in the background. "Well, if that's what you want. I'll come pick you up, wherever you are, in a few weeks." Ciel rolled his eyes. "I am sorry about the mix up. I truly thought you were coming next month."

"It's fine," Ciel said and sighed. "Look, I need to go. Good luck with your class."

Alois laughed and Ciel disconnected the call. He slipped the phone in his pocket and made his way back to Sebastian. Frustration churned in his stomach, chasing away any hunger that once sat there. He hated how a simple phone call could ruin his mood and make it turn for the worse.

"Everything okay?" Sebastian asked as he stood up.

"Somewhat," Ciel bit out. "My friend finally called. He's taking a class right now and won't finish until next month."

Sebastian brushed some dirt from his pants. "You're always welcome to stay with me until then. I don't mind." He smiled. "I actually had fun, despite my hesitation to leave at first. It was nice to get out for a while."

Ciel smiled despite himself. "Thanks. That really means a lot."

"Do you still want to go on the tour or is your mood somewhat shot?" Sebastian inquired.

His smiled faded as he debated the answer. A part of Ciel just wanted to go back to the apartment and stew over everything that happened. But that would only make him even more frustrated. "How well do you know the tour?" he asked instead.

"I've heard it a few times and walked the majority of it," Sebastian answered.

Ciel nodded. "Would you mind giving me my own personal tour?" As much fun as it would be to take the tour in a group and talk with everyone, right now, Ciel just wanted Sebastian's presence. Something about his personality calmed him and drew him in. It was a quiet pull, one that put him at ease and Ciel took silent comfort in that.

"I can do that," Sebastian said. "But first I think we should get some lunch. Nothing makes things better than food. Especially ice cream."

Ciel agreed with a laugh and they made their way to the crosswalk. The frustration at Alois remained, gripping him in a tight grasp until it hurt to breathe. But the feeling started to ebb away standing next to Sebastian. He provided a silent pillar of support and Ciel soaked in the comfort until he felt he could breathe again.

He wouldn't let Alois ruin this trip or his time with Sebastian. Ciel only had a few weeks with Sebastian and he wanted to make the best of it.


	4. Opus 4

**A/N**: Y'all get an early chapter this week! I'm currently headed up to Aomori and Hokkaido for Golden Week (taking a night train, I'm so excited! ^o^) and I was worried that I wouldn't have any battery left on my phone to post the chapter on Monday. So instead of waiting until Tuesday to post, I thought it would be better to post early instead, haha. I hope y'all enjoy the chapter! ^^

Many, many thanks to **socialbutrfly1379 **for being my amazing beta again! She was awesome working on this story :3

**Warnings**: Language

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Kuroshitsuji

* * *

The sounds of the morning news filled the apartment as Ciel waited patiently for the coffee machine to finish brewing. The aroma of the dark liquid already wafted through the kitchen and made its way into the living room where Ciel sat. On the adjacent couch, Sebastian sat with Soot. She curled up in his lap and Sebastian ran a lazy hand over her body.

In the kitchen, Ciel could hear Mey-rin cooking breakfast and he turned his attention back to the TV. He met Mey-rin a few days ago when she came back from her trip and they had a rather unpleasant encounter for their first meeting. While Sebastian had informed Mey-rin of his stay at the apartment, she forgot by the time she came back from her friend's place.

When they first met, Ciel was in the kitchen making some tea and Mey-rin thought he was a burglar. What kind of burglar stopped to make tea during a house call, Ciel didn't know, but he didn't ask questions when she pulled the mace on him. He also didn't ask questions when she tied him to a chair while they waited for Sebastian to finish his shower.

And that was how Sebastian found them several minutes later when he finally emerged from the bedroom. The longest ten minutes of Ciel's life. It took a few more minutes to explain everything before Ciel was free of his bindings and took shelter next to Sebastian.

Mey-rin had apologized profusely and Ciel knew she felt bad, but it didn't mean that he quite forgave her. Honestly, was it that hard to hear him out the first time when he tried to explain he was a guest?

But with Mey-rin's return to the apartment, Ciel had to use Sebastian's bathroom as promised. And after the fiasco when they first met, Ciel didn't want to get on her bad side. Although the one good thing about using Sebastian's shower was that it finally satisfied the itch that had made itself known when Ciel first arrived.

He wanted to see what Sebastian's bedroom looked like.

Did it look any different because he couldn't see? Perhaps sparsely decorated or would it look cluttered because it was the one place Mey-rin didn't clean? Whatever Ciel had expected, it wasn't what greeted him when he first stepped in Sebastian's room.

It felt and appeared homey, and it – just like the rest of the apartment and everything else about Sebastian – looked normal. It was so Sebastian. Not that Ciel could explain what that meant, but he could see Sebastian in the bedroom. He looked like he belonged and Ciel felt at ease in the room.

And in the end, wasn't that what a bedroom was supposed to provide? A retreat from the world and place that no one else could call their own but the person who owned it?

It made Ciel feel annoyed with himself for expecting anything else simply because it was Sebastian's room. Just because Sebastian couldn't see didn't make it any less of a room or the room itself any different. What mattered the most in the end was that Sebastian liked it. And that was all that counted.

Although Ciel often found himself lingering longer in the room before or after his shower so he could soak in the ambiance. It relaxed him and Ciel couldn't help but gaze at the pictures and awards mounted on the walls. It gave him a glimpse into Sebastian's life before they met and Ciel wanted to ask about them but held his tongue. They had only known each other for a week, far too short of a time to start digging into each other's past.

If Sebastian knew about Ciel's fascination with his room or even suspected it, he didn't say anything on the subject.

"Mey-rin," Sebastian said calmly and looked in the direction of the kitchen. "The eggs are starting to burn."

Ciel glanced over the back of the couch to look into the kitchen, watching as Mey-rin rushed back to the stove. He couldn't even sense the burning smell that Sebastian claimed to detect. Not over the pungent aroma of the coffee. He turned back to Sebastian. "So not only do you have good hearing, you also have a good nose."

Sebastian chuckled. "Not that great. I just didn't hear her stirring the pan for a while and based my judgment on that," he said. He looked out the window as a clock chimed in the hallway. "It'll take around an hour or so to get to The Yards. By that time, all the shops will have opened and you can look around before we take a break for lunch."

"Sounds good," Ciel said and stood up to get a cup of coffee. He gave Mey-rin a wide berth and poured himself a cup before making his way back to the living room. "What time does the drive start?"

"They have two shows and if we're lucky, we can catch the morning one," Sebastian answered and rubbed a spot on Soot's stomach. Her back legs kicked at his arms in response and Sebastian simply laughed at her. "I know, you're ticklish there."

Ciel stood up and walked over to the couch. "I didn't think cats were ticklish," he said and knelt in front of Sebastian. "May I?"

Sebastian gazed at him, his eyes questioning but he nodded eventually. "Your allergies?" he questioned.

"They'll be fine for now," he answered. In truth, Ciel just wanted to see and share in something that Sebastian enjoyed so much. Soot was a large part of his life and Ciel knew how important a pet was to someone. He had a dog growing up but he recently passed away while Ciel was in college. Despite his age, Ciel still cried over the loss and never once felt ashamed.

He reached forward and rubbed the same spot Sebastian had earlier. Soot mewled in protest and she pawed lightly at his fingers. Ciel laughed and his fingers slid up further until they brushed against Sebastian's. He almost jerked them away at the touch but resisted the urge at the last minute. Instead, he continued to move up Soot's front until he reached her chin.

She purred as he scratched under her chin and Ciel shook her head. "I feel like she acts more like a dog than a cat at times," he said and withdrew his hand.

"She's just as loyal as a dog," Sebastian answered and rubbed the pads of her paws. She nuzzled his other hand, butting and rubbing against it until Sebastian paid attention to her ears. "Demanding creature," he teased her and as though Soot knew what he had said, she mewed in agreement.

"Seems she's rather proud of that," Ciel said and stood up. His knees popped and Ciel groaned as he stretched out his back.

Sebastian glanced at him. "You sound sore."

Ciel twisted his torso around to stretch it out. "Just a little. I didn't sleep too well last night." He paused. "I think the air mattress needs more air."

"I'll fix that tonight when we get back," Sebastian said as Mey-rin called from the kitchen, letting them know that breakfast was ready. He stood up and Soot quickly claimed Sebastian's spot. "Will you be okay for the trip today?"

Ciel nodded. "I'm fine," he reassured Sebastian and sat down at the table. "Nothing is going to keep me from enjoying The Yards today. I've been looking forward to visiting them for a while."

He started to eat and an easy conversation fell around the table. Despite having only stayed with Sebastian for a week, Ciel felt at ease around him now. It seemed as though the wall that had separated him from Sebastian had finally fallen. A few small chunks still stood in place, but Ciel stumbled across them less and less as the days passed.

It helped that Sebastian didn't treat him any differently just because they had only known each other for a short while. Sebastian didn't hold any grudge over Ciel for being able to see when he couldn't and had seemingly accepted Ciel as a new friend compared to an acquaintance.

And Sebastian had many friends.

It seemed that everyone knew him in the Arts District. Wherever he went, at least one person could greet him by name and Sebastian would acknowledge them in return. He knew people in almost all the major halls and houses, and everyone was more than willing to give them a private tour when he asked.

Sebastian's reach even extended into the Historical District, further west of the Arts District. Connections ran deep in the neighboring areas and a call from someone in the Arts District could give them an in to certain places in the Historical District. It made Ciel's head spin and Sebastian still promised more places for them to visit.

He couldn't imagine how Sebastian seemed to know everyone but Ciel gave credit to Sebastian's easygoing personality. It drew people in and his quiet nature made it easy to be around. It further reflected in his friends, as they welcomed Ciel warmly and never made him feel like an outsider. He couldn't even begin to count how many of them invited him to upcoming events.

Their easy acceptance though of Sebastian and himself helped tear down the remaining parts of the wall that seemed to hamper Ciel. The unease had ebbed away with each person he met that treated Sebastian as a normal person compared to someone who was made of glass.

Ciel's eyes flickered to Sebastian, sweeping over his face and the calm expression he wore. He looked serene and relaxed; a stark contrast to when they first met. The tension had lessened in Sebastian's body and Ciel didn't see him lingering near the piano as he did when Ciel first arrived at the apartment.

It looked as though Claude's plan would work after all and even though Ciel didn't like that Claude had used him as a pawn, he was happy to see the change in Sebastian. A warm feeling worked its way through Ciel's body. He was the one responsible for the transformation in Sebastian's person. Yes, Claude had pushed them together, but Ciel was the one who succeed in getting Sebastian out of the apartment.

He couldn't stop the smile from spreading across his face as he bit into a piece of bacon. His toes curled together and his chest felt light and warm at the realization. Today was going to be a good day.

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

Ciel's legs protested when he stepped out of the car, stretching them for the first time since they left Sebastian's apartment. He groaned and stood on his toes before standing flat on his feet again.

Feeling immensely better, Ciel glanced around and silently took in the sights. People milled around on the streets and sidewalks, and a few horses pulled an old looking stagecoach. Their coats gleamed under the bright sunlight and Ciel itched to see them up close. Further behind them, he could see the entrance to the maze that Alois had mentioned once or twice when they talked.

The car door slammed on the other side of the car and Ciel tore his attention away from the surrounding buildings. Sebastian patted the top of the car and it drove away. Once gone, Sebastian made his way to Ciel's side. "They'll pick us up again around five-thirty," he said and his fingers brushed over the surface of his watch. "We have about fifteen minutes before the first drive starts."

"We should get a good spot then," Ciel said and glanced in the direction where the majority of the people mingled nearby. "I think it's over there."

"The best place to see it is near the town center," Sebastian commented as they started to walk, the cane sweeping back and forth. "I told the driver to drop us off there, so we should be close."

Ciel nodded as his eyes found a street sign proclaiming the area as the town center. "Yeah, we're in the right area." They crossed a street and Ciel came to a stop at a clear spot. "Here should be good," he said and looked down the street.

Other people passed them and a few stopped nearby to get their own spots. Across the road, a large group of children bounced excitedly while the adults tried to keep them under control. Judging by the similar outfits, Ciel guessed they were in a summer camp or something close. They looked like they were having fun and it beat staying inside and doing nothing all day.

A wistful sigh left Ciel's mouth and Sebastian glanced at him. "Something wrong?"

Ciel shook his head. "Just thinking," he said. "There are kids across the street from us and I just remembered a time when I was their age. I couldn't wait to grow up and be a cool adult. Now I wish I could turn back the clock and be a kid again. Those were much simpler times."

Sebastian hummed in agreement. "Funny how growing up makes you realize what you lost in childhood," he said and turned to look down the road. "Sounds like they're getting ready."

"You know," Ciel said as he shoved his hands in his pockets. "That could be a superpower."

"What could?"

Ciel gestured to Sebastian. "Your hearing," he clarified. "I can't even see anything down the street yet but you can hear them. That's an awesome power right there."

Sebastian laughed and his body trembled with amusement. "You say that, but sometimes it's a curse." He cocked his head. "I had trouble my first year in college when I had to live in the dorms because of this superpower, as you so call it."

Ciel's eyebrows furrowed. "How so?"

"I could hear people having sex," Sebastian said bluntly. "I know the walls are thin but they seemed even thinner to my ears. When my neighbor would bring a girl home, I felt like I was sitting in their room when they went at it. Suffice it to say, I moved out as soon as I could."

A small snicker left Ciel's mouth before it morphed into a deep laugh that had his stomach aching. He couldn't stop and he leaned against Sebastian for support as his shoulders shook with mirth. Just the image of Sebastian with his head under the pillow while his neighbor had sex was too much to bear. He felt bad, no one liked listening to other people doing that, but he couldn't stop.

"I'm sorry," he gasped and wiped the moisture from his eye. "It's just, you. You look so miserable when I picture it."

The admission sent him into another bout of laughter and he doubled over, his cheeks stained with wetness. Sebastian stood silently next to him and Ciel could feel fine trembles as Sebastian held back his laughter. No doubt, he laughed at Ciel's expense rather than the memory.

Finally, Ciel straightened and he rubbed at his face. "That was good," he said and looked at Sebastian. "I needed that. So how did you make it through your first year in the dorm?"

A devious smirk curled across Sebastian's lips. "I had my ways," he said.

"Tell me," Ciel said and tried his best not to whine.

"No can do," Sebastian answered and looked down the street again. "Besides, they're starting now."

Ciel huffed at the change of subject and stored it away for later. Eventually he would pester the information out of Sebastian. The bellowing of a steer chased his thoughts away and Ciel turned his attention to the livestock that made their way down the street.

The cattle meandered down the road, their heads swinging back and forth along with the massive horns that perched on their heads. Ciel stared at the horns in awe and wondered if they ever gave the cattle a headache. His eyes trailed along the length of them, focusing on the tip and he eyed the sharp points warily.

Rather, he wondered how many people they had run through with those things. They looked dangerous and intriguing at the same time. A horrible mix in Ciel's opinion.

The horses snorted as they passed and Ciel watched them carefully. Alois told him there was a place to ride somewhere here and Ciel planned to ride his first horse. It seemed like a very southern thing to do although Ciel had a feeling that Sebastian would roll his eyes at him.

"Have you ridden a horse before?" Ciel asked as the large animals continued to walk past them.

"I've been on one a few times," Sebastian answered. "But it wasn't exactly riding like you're thinking. There's a difference between actually riding a horse and simply sitting in the saddle. I did the latter."

Ciel nodded, not truly understanding but he didn't push for a clearer answer. The last of the livestock crossed in front of them and made their way down the road, signaling the end of the drive. Ciel watched them a few moments longer as the rest of the crowd broke up and then turned to Sebastian. "Shall we get started?"

"Where do you want to go first?" Sebastian asked.

"I want to save the shopping for later, not that I'll buy anything. But I just want to look around and see what they have," Ciel said. "I saw a stagecoach earlier when we got here. We could go on that first. Gives us a good look around The Yards without having to walk everywhere."

Sebastian chuckled. "That sounds fine with me. You'll have to tell me what color horses they have this time," he said as they started to walk. "I remember their names but it's been a while since I was here. I'm sure they've retired them by now."

Ciel shrugged. "They might still be there," he said. He tried to remember what colors the horses were that he saw this morning but the details escaped his grasp. It gave him a newfound respect for Sebastian who had to memorize almost everything for an extended period. Ciel couldn't even remember something he just saw less than an hour ago.

They approached the stagecoach and the driver greeted them with a warm smile. "Y'all lookin' for a ride?" he asked in a thick southern drawl.

"Yeah," Ciel said and gestured to the horses. "What are their names?"

The driver moved to the back horse and patted its neck fondly. "This one here is Bell, 'cause she's a right pretty Southern Bell." He gestured to the horse next to the mare. "And this girl is Bonnet, short for Bluebonnet. And at the front you have Pecos and Widow-Maker. Widow-Maker is the one there on the right."

Ciel glanced at Sebastian. "Same horses?"

Sebastian grinned. "Same horses," he said and looked at the animals. "Still the same beautiful horses."

And Ciel couldn't agree more.

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

A low hiss of frustration left Ciel's mouth as he turned a corner and found a dead end in front of him. He felt like he was going around in circles and he knew that somewhere up on the observation tower, Sebastian found humor at his predicament. Not that Sebastian could see him struggling, but it wouldn't be hard to ask.

He retraced his steps and made his way in a different direction. The laughter around him reassured him that he wasn't the only one struggling in the maze and reminded him to have fun. The kids he saw earlier that morning were in the maze with him, having entered a little before him. If worst came to worst, Ciel would trail one of them until he found a way out.

Ciel rounded another corner and grunted as someone ran into him. "Sorry," he said and looked down at the kid that bumped into him. "Are you okay?"

The child nodded and stared at him, making Ciel shift uncomfortably. What if he screamed or even worse, accused him of doing something Ciel didn't do? He had heard those horror stories before. "I know you!" the boy exclaimed suddenly and Ciel took an involuntary step back. Something about the boy's cheerful tone put Ciel on edge. "You were standing with the guy this morning with the funny stick."

Ciel sputtered, taken aback by the rather blunt words. "Yes," he finally said when he found his voice. "I saw your group this morning during the drive. Are you in a summer camp of sorts?"

The child ignored his question and plowed forward. "What's wrong with him?" he demanded. "Everyone gives him funny looks and they keep away from him. Is he sick? Does he have cooties?"

The churning in Ciel's stomach came back full force and he felt a wave of vertigo wash over him. "N-No, he's not sick," Ciel said, finding it hard to hear himself over the ringing in his ears. His face flushed hotly as the child continued to stare at him and suddenly the maze felt constricting.

"Then why does everyone look at him funny?" the child asked again. He gave Ciel a strange look and moved back from him. "Are you sick too?"

"I'm not sick!" Ciel almost shouted and his palms grew slick from sweat that had nothing to do with the heat. "And there's nothing wrong with me. I'm normal."

The child cocked his head. "So he's not normal?" Understand lit up the child's eyes and he beamed. "I get it. He's like one of those weird people on the TV. My older sister calls them freaks."

Ciel's stomach plummeted to his feet and he found himself at a loss for words. Nothing came forward to defend himself, let alone Sebastian, and Ciel felt his world quickly spiraling out of control. How could children say such cruel words? They looked so innocent but behind that façade hid a nasty demon with a sharp tongue.

He wanted nothing more than to raise his hand to the child but he knew nothing good would come from that. Instead, Ciel swallowed around the thick lump that had lodged itself in his throat and tried his best to clear his spinning head. "I'm not a freak," he finally said and somewhere in the back of his mind, a tiny voice asked about Sebastian. "I… we're both normal."

The child crossed his arms and scowled at him. "You can't be normal if everyone is giving you strange looks. That's the opposite of normal." He looked thoughtful. "Like the time we saw a girl with blue hair. Everyone kept staring at her and Miss Kay said it wasn't normal."

Ciel shook his head. "That's different," he protested weakly but the child didn't look convinced. "I need to go."

He rushed off in a different direction before the boy could say anything and moved about in a blind haze. No one else bothered him as he stumbled around the maze, but the boy's words stayed with him the whole time. They haunted him and sat on his shoulder, a heavy weight that seemed to make each step harder and harder to take.

Finally, Ciel emerged from the maze, victorious in a sense but he felt anything but accomplished. He hadn't been able to shake the words as he searched for the exit and they still clung to his mind as he looked around for Sebastian. It took a few moments, but he finally found Sebastian sitting at a nearby picnic table.

The ringing noise in Ciel's ears vanished, replaced instead with the loud roaring sound of his heart as he looked around the grounds. People milled around the area as they did when Ciel first entered the maze. But that was before the veil had been torn violently from his eyes.

Without it, Ciel could see exactly what the boy talked about in the maze. A small group of kids from the camp sat under a tree further away, but their wide eyes remained focused on Sebastian. They whispered into each other's ears and pointed, while the adults ignored them but tossed pitying glances Sebastian's way.

Other people made a wide berth around the spot where Sebastian sat, as though they feared he would suddenly leap at them. They eyed the white cane and hurried past him, occasionally giving him the same sympathetic look as the first group of adults.

Ciel swallowed and wiped his palms on his pants. Did they look at him like that – eyes filled with pity and barely veiled curiosity, as though Sebastian was on display at a circus instead of sitting at a picnic table minding his own business – when they saw Ciel with Sebastian? Dread clawed its way up Ciel's throat.

Did they think something was wrong with him too because he was with Sebastian?

He shook his head but couldn't dispel the thought. It remained lodged in his mind and the more it lingered, the more Ciel's began to notice his surroundings. Was that person standing near the entrance of the maze giving him a sorrowful look or was Ciel just imagining it? Did that man speed up when he walked by Ciel?

Heart hammering against his chest, Ciel reluctantly made his way to Sebastian's side. He felt as though everyone in the nearby area watched him as he walked over to Sebastian. Their judging gaze heavy on his shoulders and Ciel couldn't hide from their piercing eyes.

Sebastian glanced up as he approached and set his phone on the table. "Took you long enough," he teased. "I worried I might have to go in there and find you myself if you didn't come out soon."

Ciel gave a weak laugh. "Yeah, it was a lot harder than I thought," he said and rubbed his arm as he looked around. He didn't know if it was his mind playing tricks on him or not, but he felt that everyone still watched them interact and he felt like he was in a cage at the circus with Sebastian. On display while people watched him do tricks for their entertainment.

"Did you want to go horseback riding next?" Sebastian asked and stood up. He reached for his cane and missed the first time before grabbing it the second attempt. Ciel's ears burned with embarrassment, for whom though, he didn't know.

"I thought maybe we could get something to eat," he said quickly. "It's already past noon and the maze made me hungry." The less they were outside where everyone could see them, the better. A quiet place in the corner of the restaurant would be perfect. Maybe they could stay there for the remainder of their trip if they were lucky.

Sebastian nodded and started to walk back toward the buildings. "Any place in particular?"

"Someplace dark," Ciel said without thinking. Sebastian glanced over his shoulder, giving him a strange look and Ciel rushed to correct himself. "I have a headache from running around that maze in the sun. I think someplace that's not too bright would help my headache."

If Sebastian suspected anything, he didn't say and instead gave a slow nod of his head. "I'm sure we could find something to suit your tastes. I told you to wear some sunglasses. They make things a bit better."

Ciel gave a weak laugh. "Yeah," he said and unconsciously reached up to run his fingers under his eyes. If he wore sunglasses while he was with Sebastian, everyone would think both of them were blind. He couldn't imagine the stares they would get then.

By the time they made it to the restaurant, Ciel nerves felt frayed and stressed. Everywhere he looked, he felt that people were staring at them. Imagination or factual, it didn't matter to Ciel and he saw them both. The social situation had grabbed him fully and made itself known while refusing to let go.

To add to his problem, Ciel knew that Sebastian could tell something was wrong. He could see crimson eyes glancing at him on occasion and eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

Ciel tried to tell himself that it didn't matter what other people thought, but the thoughts refused to convince him. He became painfully aware of every little action around him and a permanent flush of embarrassment stained his ears and cheeks. It only further deepened as the hostess stared openly at Sebastian when they stepped up to her.

"Two please," Ciel said and his eyes darted around the room quickly, taking in how many people would see them once they stepped further into the restaurant. Far too many Ciel decided after he finished looking. "Can we have a booth in the corner, too?"

She nodded and grabbed two menus before leading them to the nearest corner booth. It sat tucked away in the far corner and no one would bother to look in their direction unless they had a reason to. Only a few heads turned as they passed and when Ciel slid into the booth, he could only see one or two curious eyes glancing in their direction.

The hostess told them the house special and took their drink orders before scurrying away. Ciel slunk further in his seat and busied himself with looking at the menu. "Do you, ah, know what you want?" he asked.

Sebastian nodded. "I'm just getting the house special," he said and nudged the menu away with the tips of his fingers. His gaze focused on Ciel, eyes burning with intensity even though they couldn't see anything. "What's the matter, Ciel?"

"Nothing," Ciel said quickly, firmly ignoring the voice that called him a liar. "Just tired. We've done a lot of things the past week."

And all those things were back in the Arts District where everyone knew Sebastian. They knew about his disability and had accepted it without a problem. No one gave him a second glance and treated him as though he wasn't blind. But out here, at The Yards and several miles away from the comforts of the Arts District, the same rule didn't apply.

People stared. They pointed. They whispered.

The words the boy spoke in the maze raced through Ciel's mind. Freak. Not normal. Sick.

Staying in the Arts District for the past week had encased Ciel in a little bubble. One that kept the outside world away and made it seem as though everything was fine. But stepping outside of that area of comfort had burst the comfortable bubble Ciel had lived in for the past few days. It thrust him back into the real world where not everyone was as accepting.

It reminded him that the world wasn't all that understanding to situations outside of the norm and that people didn't know how to handle things they didn't understand. It wasn't just The Yards either, it was anywhere else Ciel would go with Sebastian outside of the safety of the Arts District.

They had planned to go to other places this week but now, Ciel didn't know if he could stomach a repeat of today. The stares grated on him and exhausted him more than he wanted to admit. More than anything, he wanted to go back to the apartment and hide away from the piercing eyes that seemed to find them wherever they went.

"Ciel?" Sebastian tried again, his gaze not quite focusing on him but rather a spot near his shoulders.

"I'm fine," he snapped, harsher than he meant and Ciel quickly mumbled an apology as someone set their drinks down on the table. He sipped his water as Sebastian ordered and gave his own before the waitress left. "What time does the car come again?"

Sebastian's finger traced the condensation on the glass. "Around five-thirty," he answered.

Ciel glanced at his phone again. It was just after two, meaning they still had several hours before they could leave. Three long and torturous hours of people staring at him.

He didn't say anything else and an uncomfortable silence settled around the table. Sebastian's eyebrows remained furrowed as his fingers continued to feel the beading water on his glass and Ciel stared at everything else in the building but Sebastian. It was a relief when their lunch finally arrived and Ciel started to eat, glad to have a reason not to talk.

He wasn't sure what they would do after this and his stomach churned uneasily for several different reasons. Ciel felt sick from the stares and the whispered words that might or might not exist.

All Ciel knew was that the wall was back in place. Firm, solid, and unmoving. The screaming gargoyle perched above him, mouth wide open and teeth bared.

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

Breakfast the next morning was tense. Even more strained than the rest of the day at The Yards and far more awkward than the ride back from The Yards the previous day.

Despite returning to the safety of the apartment, where no one could stare or point, Ciel had trouble relaxing again. He remained on edge and snappy, and sleep eluded him that night. He tossed and turned on the mattress, even after Sebastian filled it with more air. The blankets felt too hot and constricting, and the silence in the apartment seemed to scream in Ciel's ears.

And even in the dark, several miles away from The Yards, Ciel could still feel the heavy gazes on his body. Could still hear the words from the maze. They haunted him at every corner of his dreams and more than once, Ciel woke in a panic, waving his hand in front of him to make sure he could still see.

By the time the sun rose and life started anew in the apartment for the day, Ciel felt exhausted. A headache had blossomed between his eyes and threatened to crawl up to his temples. It pulsed with every beat of his heart and for the longest time, Ciel refused to leave the bed.

He finally emerged when the urge to use the bathroom became too great and he made his way downstairs after relieving himself. Sebastian sat at his usual place in the living room, listening to the news while drinking some orange juice and greeted him warmly.

To Sebastian, nothing had changed between them even though he could sense that something was off about Ciel. It made it harder to face Sebastian because things had shifted for Ciel. The wall had come back and once again, he couldn't see over it and it blocked Sebastian from view.

Ciel gave a gruff morning greeting and trudged into the kitchen. He started making the coffee, knowing all too well that he would need several cups if he wanted to make it through the day.

He made it a point to stay out of the living room. The large windows that made up the half the walls were too open and Ciel wanted to shield himself from their eyes. Even though they were back in the Arts District, Ciel found himself doubting whether people accepted Sebastian or not.

What if he had just imagined that and they really gave Sebastian the same looks as the people at The Yards did? He hated the nagging self-doubt that refused to vanish from the depths of his mind. It only made the headache worse and Ciel hated himself for thinking that way.

And then Sebastian asked the question during breakfast that made the tension that much more suffocating.

"When do you want to leave for the Galleria?"

That was five minutes ago and Ciel still hadn't found it in himself to answer. The Galleria was a large mall in the northern part of the city, far enough away from the Arts District. While the fear to leave the apartment hadn't made itself known when Ciel first woke up, it came roaring back with all the force of a hurricane when Sebastian asked the question.

He wouldn't be able to stand the heavy stares again, especially in the mall. It was bound to be even more crowded than The Yards and Ciel shrunk back in his chair at the mere thought.

"Ciel?" Sebastian tried again.

Ciel shook his head. "I…I can head up there by myself," he said. "You've taken me around now for over a week and I'm sure you want some time to think about your composition."

Sebastian frowned. "It's not a problem, Ciel. I've been writing small notes down whenever they arise but I'm not in a rush right now." He cocked his head. "But if you're that worried, we can postpone it until tomorrow and just stay in today. We had a long day yesterday."

"That's not it," Ciel said, his tone frustrated. How could he tell Sebastian that it wasn't just the pitying stares thrown their way or the whispered words? Something else about the situation weighed on his mind but he couldn't put his finger on it. It continued to evade him.

Mey-rin politely excused herself, leaving them alone at the table and Ciel hated her for leaving. Now alone, he felt the full weight of Sebastian's gaze on him. "What's the matter, Ciel?" he asked calmly, but his voice left no room for circumvention. "Something has been bothering you since yesterday."

Ciel grunted and poked at his breakfast. "Nothing's wrong."

"I'm blind, not stupid, Ciel," Sebastian snapped and Ciel felt his defenses rising.

"I never said you were," he said.

Crimson eyes narrowed. "Then what is it? Was it something I did or said?"

Ciel gripped his fork tighter as he stomach clenched. The frustration from the previous day quickly came back and joined with the stiffness that filled the room now. And like vomit, the words came pouring forth before Ciel could stop them and he remained powerless to stem their flow.

"I just want to go alone! I don't want to go with you," Ciel shouted and the fleeting notion that had evaded him for so long suddenly fell into his lap. He was embarrassed to be seen with Sebastian.

The silence in the kitchen turned deafening and Ciel thought for a moment he might truly become sick. The world seemed to pitch and roll before his eyes and the ringing in his ears had returned. He couldn't bring himself to look up at Sebastian and his face felt inflamed, from the tips of his ears all the way to the base of his neck.

"You're worried about what people will think about you when they see you with me," Sebastian said after several seconds of thick silence.

Ciel swallowed and tried his best to argue the point, but the words fell like ash on his tongue. He couldn't bring himself to lie to Sebastian or admit the truth. Both tasted bitter in his mouth and in the end, Ciel could only make a quiet noise in the back of his throat.

Sebastian didn't say anything to his silence and Ciel kept his eyes focused on the table. They traced the wood patterns and he vaguely wondered if the table was made of real wood or faux material. He rubbed the surface with the pad of his finger. It felt real enough. And if he looked closely, the swirl in the wood nearest him looked like a double helix.

The stillness stretched on and Ciel's shoulders hunched. He felt like a child again – and his mother would cuff him on the head and tell him he was acting like one – standing in front of his parents after doing something wrong. The guilt welled up in his chest and pressed against him until it threatened to suffocate him.

"If you catch the number twenty-four bus, it'll take you directly to the Galleria," Sebastian said quietly and the silence scattered like birds taking flight in the morning light. Ciel glanced up at him and instantly winced. "It comes twice every hour. If you hurry, you can catch the next one."

Ciel didn't need any more encouraging and after mumbling a quick expression of gratitude, raced from the kitchen. He took the steps two at a time and changed in record time. He didn't bother brushing his teeth, choosing to shove a piece of gum in his mouth as he searched for his wallet.

He found it in the pile of clothes he wore yesterday and Ciel's eyes flickered over the edge of the loft. From where he stood, he could just see downstairs and into the kitchen, where Sebastian sat unmoving at the kitchen table. His long bangs hid his face from Ciel's view and Ciel turned away before the guilt could become anymore suffocating.

He snatched his phone from the nearby table and almost tripped going down the steps. He only paused long enough to glance in the direction of the kitchen before reaching for his shoes. The silence stretched from the kitchen and reached the foyer, curling around him as Ciel slipped his shoes on and he fumbled for the door handle, unable to take it anymore.

Ciel stumbled outside, squinting as bright sunlight assaulted his eyes and he sucked in a deep breath. He could breathe a tad easier but the fresh morning air did nothing to ease the guilt that had built up in his chest. It took over his body, ensnaring his very being until Ciel couldn't move.

The door slammed shut behind him – the familiar thick wall shooting up from the ground once more, forming an unbreakable barrier between them again and Ciel could only stare at it with desperation – sealing him away from Sebastian. The solid door provided a temporary means to escape Sebastian so he didn't have to see him and gave Ciel a chance to run.

But it didn't block out the memory of Sebastian's face and Ciel could still see the hurt etched on his face and the pain swimming in crimson eyes.


	5. Opus 5

**A/N**: Onto the next chapter! Thank you everyone for the wonderful support! I hope y'all enjoy the chapter! ^^ Many, many thanks to **socialbutrfly1379 **for being my amazing beta again! She was awesome working on this story :3

**Warnings**: Language

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Kuroshitsuji

* * *

Ciel avoided Sebastian the rest of the day.

After returning from the Galleria, he stayed up in the loft and only ventured downstairs if he needed to eat something. And when he needed something to eat, Ciel made it a point to leave the apartment instead of sneaking into the kitchen. Sebastian stayed downstairs and going anywhere past the staircase only increased the chance of running into him.

But for the most part, he remained in the loft, reading some books that he brought and looking over the few items he purchased since arriving at the apartment. His phone provided some means of entertainment, but all the games and music in the world couldn't break the unease that had settled throughout the apartment.

The feeling carpeted the apartment and invoked a silence that Ciel hastened to keep. He cringed whenever he stepped on a squeaky board or when he had to use the restroom. Any noise that broke the stillness seemed too loud and it had Ciel looking over his shoulder, as though Sebastian would suddenly appear at the lightest of noises.

He dreaded having to deal with Sebastian, and Ciel didn't even know where to begin. How did he fix the mess he had unintentionally made? Sorry was a good starting place but it hardly seemed strong enough. Ciel couldn't take back the words he said and he struggled with himself over his own feelings.

They warred with each other and only served to confuse Ciel even more. He didn't know whether he was right or wrong with the way he acted. Anyone else would've acted the same when faced with the unfamiliar situation. But at the same time, Ciel knew it was wrong. He shouldn't have treated Sebastian that way.

But did that also mean that Sebastian shouldn't expect the same from him as he did Claude? He never asked for this, to stay with someone who was blind, but he swallowed his unease and stayed. Not only that, Ciel did his best not to treat Sebastian as though he was made of glass. He had looked past the disability and it wasn't the blindness that Ciel had a problem with.

It was just the unnerving staring from other people.

He groaned and tipped his head back against the wall behind him. "This isn't helping," he moaned and rubbed at his temples.

What was he supposed to do in a situation like this? He didn't take any classes on this and felt oddly lost. For the first time since starting college, Ciel could feel the presence of the 'real world' that his teachers talked about throughout his life. Something that no amount of classroom learning could have prepared him for.

All the trials and tribulations that he would face in life suddenly felt real. Their presence loomed on the horizon, just beyond his reach and lying in wait – ready to pounce as he matured. The once smooth and barely curving road had turned into a deadly mountain pass filled with hairpin turns, deep crevasses, and rough bumps.

"Ciel," Sebastian called from the living room and Ciel stiffened. He hadn't heard from Sebastian since he left in the morning and he pressed himself flat against the wall, hoping it would somehow offer a hiding place. "The shower is ready," Sebastian continued.

Ciel didn't answer and he found himself holding his breath. Perhaps if he stayed quiet long enough, Sebastian would lose interest. Like a hunter hunting game. They would move on after a while if their prey didn't show. Leave for new hunting grounds.

The quiet stretched on and Ciel found himself breathing easier. He didn't hear anything downstairs but he didn't trust himself to move. The only thing that would ruin his plan was if Sebastian came upstairs to pursue him further. Ciel swallowed and his eyes darted to the bed. He could always feign sleep.

Nodding to himself, Ciel shifted against the wall. He took a deep breath and started to crawl away from his meager hiding spot, pointedly ignoring how ridiculous he looked. Sebastian called his name again and Ciel froze; one hand hovering over the floor and a leg poised to move. His ears strained to hear any movement downstairs and in the stillness downstairs, Ciel heard the lightest of footsteps headed toward the steps.

Without another thought, Ciel bolted for the mattress. He scrambled under the covers, clothes and all, and quickly rolled around into place. It didn't matter, he vaguely mused, Sebastian wouldn't see him sleeping. Ciel could only make it sound like he was asleep.

The footsteps continued up the steps and Ciel tried to even out his breathing. His racing heart didn't make things easy and Ciel squeezed his eyes shut as Sebastian stopped at the top of the loft.

"Ciel?" Sebastian called quietly.

Ciel gave a small – very fake – snore in return.

He didn't dare to open his eyes to see Sebastian and tried his best to keep his breathing steady. He flinched when the lights turned off and the footsteps retreated from the loft. They moved down the steps and back into the living room. Once they faded, Ciel's eyes opened and he squinted in the dark.

A faint light illuminated the downstairs area and threw the far wall into shadows, but it still didn't provide enough light to see. It clicked off a moment later, throwing the whole apartment into darkness and in the inky blackness; Ciel heard Sebastian's door shut.

Ciel's shoulders slumped and he buried his face into the pillow. The shadows felt suffocating and Ciel cursed under his breath. Even though he had escaped dealing with Sebastian for the night, he felt like a coward. He had run from him as though Sebastian had the plague. Sebastian didn't deserve that.

His face burned with humiliation and in the quiet night, but Ciel didn't know what he felt more ashamed of. How he treated Sebastian or his own actions. Sebastian's pained face flickered through his thoughts and Ciel winced, already knowing the answer.

He closed his eyes tightly in an attempt to block out the memory as he drifted off into a fretful sleep.

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

Bright sunlight skated across Ciel's face, tossing the rays over his closed eyes and successfully pulling him from the depths of sleep. He tossed an arm over his face in a vague attempt to try to go back to sleep but the sunlight remained persistent. A cool blue eye peeked open and glared at the offending rays.

How dare it be so sunny and cheerful when Ciel still felt like the lowest scum of the earth? Where was the stereotypical cloudy and rainy day that supposedly matched his mood? He couldn't find it anywhere and it left Ciel instead to face a cheerful day filled with brightness compared to a dreary day.

Ciel sighed and blew a strand of wayward hair from his face. His skin felt itchy and his hair greasy, a result of skipping a shower last night. He couldn't take up Sebastian's offer, too tense and embarrassed to answer the call. Instead, he hid like a frightened child in the loft and feigned sleep.

He sat up slowly and raked a hand through his hair before turning to look at the open wall. His hands lowered to rest in his lap and Ciel twirled his fingers around each other.

Where had his self-assuredness gone? He once prided himself in never running from a problem, choosing instead to face it head on as best he could. Yet here he sat, running with tail tucked between his legs. What about Sebastian made Ciel stutter to a halt? It left him fumbling around in a blind haze.

Ciel lowered his gaze down to his fingers and they soothed out the creases in the blanket. One of his fingers brushed over the small square stitched into the fabric and he stroked it gently.

Was it because of his disability? A disability that he could barely even notice unless he really looked at times?

A hollow laugh left Ciel's mouth and he tipped back onto the mattress. He already knew that answer. He stared at the ceiling and traced random shapes with his eyes as his thoughts chased themselves around his mind.

'_It's not you so much as it is me.'_

The words ingrained themselves into Ciel's thoughts and he mouthed them silently to the ceiling. It gave him an unimpressed look and Ciel closed his eyes. He knew what it was about Sebastian that made him feel so uneasy, even though he hated to admit it.

The blindness in Sebastian's eyes drew up Ciel. Each and every time, and Ciel hated himself for that.

He was a college graduate. Someone with a degree earned after several years of schooling and a functioning member of society. He thought himself better than this. That his years going through schooling – not just college but all the years before that, and there were several years once Ciel thought about it – had taught him better than this.

Yet when faced with Sebastian, all the walls that Ciel never thought existed had come back in a hurry. They built themselves up in the span of a second. Walls that Ciel thought he had torn down with each year he grew older and supposedly wiser.

He hated that all it took was one person to prove him wrong. They showed him that he wasn't that mature person he always pictured himself to be. No, he was nothing but a child who played keep away with the other kids on the playground. Sebastian was the one with the cooties and you always avoided them as a child.

Ciel rolled over onto his stomach, the blanket still clutched between his fingers. Wasn't it just the other day that he thought he had torn that wall down? Perhaps he had, but it was only a temporary fix. When faced with uncertainty it had appeared again, only stronger and thicker than before.

The moment people started staring, Ciel had thrown up his own defenses and tried to distance himself from the object of attention. It wasn't right and Ciel hated himself for doing it, but he couldn't take it back. And it didn't change the fact that a part of him still felt incredibly embarrassed to go out with Sebastian.

That part made him even more frustration and further spurred Ciel's self-isolation. But he didn't know who he hid from. Sebastian or himself. His embarrassment remained two-fold, split between the humiliation at confronting Sebastian again and the shame Ciel felt within himself.

His mind remained torn on the subject and in the end, Ciel figured that he wanted to hide from both. He wanted to avoid Sebastian after the events yesterday morning and ignoring Sebastian helped him avoid his thoughts. In a roundabout way.

He buried his face in the pillow and groaned lowly. He didn't know what to think anymore and it left him exhausted. Although he was surprised that Claude or Mey-rin weren't breathing down his neck by now. Judging by the fact that Claude hadn't shown up with gun drawn, Ciel believed that Sebastian hadn't informed him of their disagreement.

It made the guilt rise even more and Ciel almost wished that Claude had stopped by to chew him out. Perhaps then, it would help kick Ciel into gear. Or at least give him someone to talk to. He desperately wanted to know how Claude handled all the staring and pitying looks. How had they not weighed him down yet?

"Frustrating," Ciel hissed and tossed the covers off his body. He couldn't take staying in bed anymore and letting his thoughts continue to race around his mind. It made the headache in his temples pulse with each beat of his heart and the pain threatened to make him nauseous.

He clambered out of the mess of blankets and sheets, stumbling to the bathroom to wash his face. He went about his morning routine in a robotic daze, doing everything on autopilot as he moved about the small bathroom.

"Ciel," Sebastian called as he exited the room and the noise jerked Ciel from his daze. His head snapped in the direction of the living room, the harshness of it making his neck pop and he winced. "I'm about to start breakfast, what would you like to eat?"

Ciel floundered for words, his tongue heavy in his mouth and his blood like ice in his veins. How could Sebastian act as though nothing had happened the other day? He still went about his day, treating Ciel as he had before and offering his hospitality after everything Ciel had said and done. How?

The notion baffled Ciel and he could barely squeak out that he toast was fine. Sebastian didn't answer but Ciel could hear him moving around in the kitchen, opening the pantry door to pull out the bread. He wanted to scream at Sebastian to stop acting as though their disagreement hadn't happened. To do something so the suffocating guilt didn't drown him.

Reluctantly, he made his way downstairs. Sebastian had called him out and Ciel knew better than to ignore him. He owed Sebastian that much at least. But it didn't stop him from slinking into the living room like a dog that had just destroyed the furniture.

"You look disgusting," Mey-rin said the moment he sat down on the couch. Ciel's heart seized up in his chest at the harsh words and he thought that Mey-rin would tear into him today. Instead, she gestured to her hair. "It looks pretty unkempt. Did you even wash it yesterday?"

Ciel sputtered and before he could answer, Sebastian's soft laughter reached his ears. "He didn't shower yesterday. He was already asleep when I finished my shower," he glanced in Ciel's direction with a gentle smile that looked out of place on Sebastian's face after everything. "The Galleria wear you out that much?" he teased.

"I, I," Ciel started and the remorse continued to press against him. It weighed him down and if he hadn't been sitting, Ciel knew his knees would've buckled under the pressure.

Sebastian waved a hand and turned his attention back to the papers in front of him. "You have time still before breakfast. Go shower real quick. By the time you finish, breakfast will be ready."

Ciel nodded absently and skirted around Mey-rin as he made his way back upstairs. He wouldn't lie, a shower was exactly what he needed right now but at the same time he dreaded the thought of taking one. It meant he would have to go into Sebastian's room again and for a moment, Ciel pondered the idea of risking Mey-rin's wrath by using hers.

He decided against it. Between Sebastian and Mey-rin, Sebastian was the lesser of two evils.

They didn't say anything to him when he slipped into Sebastian's room and Ciel let out a long sigh as he closed the door behind him. As always, Sebastian's room greeted him with a soft embrace and threatened to put him at ease. It had that homey feeling to it and Ciel could easily see Sebastian relaxing in the room.

It only served to make Ciel feel more disappointed about himself and without looking around, he shuffled into the bathroom. He didn't linger in the shower long, only taking enough time to wash his hair and body before climbing out.

The smell of breakfast permeated the air as he dried himself off and Ciel's stomach grumbled. He hadn't realized how hungry he was until now and he quickly pulled on his clothes. The aroma hit him full blast when he stepped outside of the bedroom, along with the lightest sound of music that seemed to float around the living room.

The pull of strings and the push of air from the wind instruments surrounded Ciel, teasing his senses. It overrode the fainter sounds that came from the kitchen and Ciel walked further into the living room. He almost expected to find a full orchestra sitting in the area instead of the couches.

But the couches remained and he sat down heavily on one, a towel still draped over his shoulders. His eyes closed and he let the music caress his ears. It soothed over them, coaxing him to relax and breathe deeply, and Ciel felt his thoughts slowly quiet down. It didn't take long before he found himself sitting alone in the apartment.

No one else existed outside his small bubble where the music surrounded him. It left him in his own world and Ciel tipped his head back against the couch. A faint smile touched his lips and he felt the music grab a hold of his senses. It made him leave his body and carried him away on black lines and rhythms.

"Beautiful, isn't it," a quiet voice said next to his ear.

Ciel jumped and instantly, the illusion dispersed. The soft background colors fled and the lines vanished, leaving him tumbling through the abyss until he crashed to earth again. He landed on the couch with a muted thump that jerked him back to reality and Ciel turned to look over his shoulder.

Mey-rin stared back at him, eyes inquisitive and she straightened up. "Breakfast is ready."

Ciel nodded and stood up. He went to thank her, but Mey-rin had already made her way back to the kitchen. He swallowed the nervousness that had built up again and walked into the kitchen as well. The scene looked all too familiar and a sense of déjà vu washed over Ciel. He only hoped they wouldn't have a repeat of yesterday morning.

He sat down and Sebastian reached for the syrup, squirting a small amount on his plate. "Feel better?" he asked and Ciel blinked owlishly at him. "After your shower I mean," Sebastian continued and took a bite of his pancake.

"Yeah," Ciel said and spread some butter on his toast. His stomach continued clenching, waiting for the moment when Sebastian would start yelling at him or finally bring up what happened the other day.

"That's good," Sebastian answered and nudged the plate of pancakes in Ciel's direction. "I know you said you wanted toast, but Mey-rin made more than enough."

Ciel mumbled his thanks and took two small pancakes from the stack. His eyes darted between Sebastian and Mey-rin, wondering what was going on. The uncertainty made him tense and put him on edge until Ciel wanted nothing more for them to act upon their anger. At least then, it would be out of the way and the indecisiveness would ebb away.

The words never came though and Ciel forced down a mouthful of pancakes that tasted more like ash. He gulped down some milk afterwards and poked at the remaining pieces on his plate. If Sebastian or Mey-rin didn't kill him, then the anxiety certainly would.

"Are you going anywhere today?" Sebastian asked, the question piercing Ciel's defenses with ease.

It left him staring blankly at Sebastian and his grip tightened on his fork until his knuckles turned white. He didn't know the angle Sebastian played but it left Ciel feeling edgy.

"I don't know," he muttered, choosing a safe answer for the time being.

Sebastian nodded and his fingers curled around the warm cup in front of him. "I would suggest the aquarium or the nearby thrill park," he said and cocked his head in thought. "I believe the number forty-two bus goes to the aquarium. It's about a twenty-minute ride if I remember correctly. And the number three bus goes to the thrill park."

Mey-rin shook her head. "They changed it last year," she said and reached for the remaining pancakes. "They combined the bus routes so the number forty-two bus goes to both the aquarium and the park."

"Ah, well, there you go," Sebastian said with a pleased smile. "Saves you bus fare if you want to visit both on the same day. The park isn't that big so you can ride everything in a few hours if you want."

"Thanks," Ciel said, still uncertain about everything. Why were they acting as though yesterday hadn't happened? If Ciel were in Sebastian's shoes, he wouldn't find it in himself to act so hospitable and forgiving. "What about you?" he asked hesitantly.

Sebastian hummed lightly. "I have plans so I need to stay here," he said. "Will you need a map for the bus route?"

Ciel shook his head. "I think I'll go tomorrow or later this week," he said quietly. "I feel like staying inside today." Funny how even though Ciel didn't want anyone to see him with Sebastian, he still felt strange going without him.

"Just let me know when you want to go," Sebastian said, smile still on his face.

The smile unnerved Ciel. It didn't belong on Sebastian's face. Not after everything that happened yesterday. Ciel expected to see the same hurt and pain that he saw yesterday, but it had vanished. It was as though the conversation the other day hadn't happened at all to Sebastian. Sebastian had either forgiven him or wanted to pretend the disagreement had ever happened.

Neither option sat well with Ciel but he remained too cowardly to bring the topic up. If Sebastian wanted to forget it and move on, his mind argued, then what was the point of trying to discuss it? It would only cause unneeded trouble for them both.

But knowing that still didn't stop the growing guilt. It gnawed at him as the conversation dwindled and the silence of the apartment swept them up. The only thing that kept it from becoming awkward was the music that continued to swirl throughout the apartment. It moved like fallen leaves caught up in the autumn wind. Dancing along everything it touched, but its contact remained light and fleeting. There one minute and gone the next.

But when one note left, another took its place. It continued the flowing rhythm, flowing and serene as it caught Ciel up in its current. It carried him away from the kitchen table and to another place.

"This music is nice," he said.

Mey-rin nodded. "Perfection in black and white," she said.

Sebastian chuckled. "I wouldn't call it perfection," he stated and stood up, carrying his plate to the sink.

The water started to run, but it didn't drown out the music. The notes continued to run along the staff, strong and sure despite their feather light touch and Ciel almost let it take him away again. He had to force himself to remain focused and he glanced at Mey-rin. "Why did he say that?"

"Hmm?"

"That it wasn't perfection," Ciel clarified.

Mey-rin blinked and glanced in Sebastian's direction. "Because he's being stubborn," she answered and looked back down at her plate. She stabbed a piece of sausage. "It's not that he's hearing wrong notes or anything. But rather that he doesn't think the composer is perfect."

Ciel frowned and twisted in his chair to look at the stereo system in the living room as though it would provide the answers he sought. "Who is the composer?"

A sly smirk stretched across Mey-rin's lips. "You're living with him, blue eyes," she said. "I'm sure Claude told you he's a composer."

Ciel remained silent, taking in the words with a numb mind. He knew Sebastian was a composer and Ciel's reason for staying in general was to give Sebastian a break. But never once during his time had he heard any music, let alone music that Sebastian created from his mind. He never thought to ask, too caught up in touring the city and enjoying his time.

Now that he thought about it, the symphony hall remained the one place they hadn't visited yet. Sebastian claimed that he wanted to save it for a special day and would take him there soon. Ciel wondered if Sebastian would still take him after everything that happened.

"That's…wow," Ciel breathed as the music seemed to swell.

The notes raced toward the end and Ciel thought he could sense the finale but at the last minute, the notes tapered. The tone lowered and the violins sang in harmony as the bows swept across the strings. A quieter noise answered the violins, one that Ciel recognized as the deeper bass instruments and the violins passed the melody off to them.

Slowly, the bass faded until a single instrument played. It played the final note, drawing it long and loud across the strings and with it, the emotions of anyone listening. When it finally ended, the tapering noise vanished abruptly and it flung Ciel back to his senses. He shook his head, trying to dispel the sudden jolt.

He looked at Mey-rin and she had a smug grin on her face. "That's Sebastian's talent," she said and stood up. She grabbed her plate and Ciel watched her eyes flash with something dangerous but she didn't act on whatever thoughts raced through her mind.

He didn't say anything as she walked into the kitchen. He pushed the rest of his breakfast away, appetite gone as another song started to play in the living room.

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

Ciel glanced up from his book as the doorbell rang several times and he placed a bookmark before closing it. He knew that style of ringing and he leisurely made his way to the front door. No need to rush to answer it when Claude wanted to chew him out for treating Sebastian the way he had.

After a few minutes of debate in front of the door, he opened it with a heavy sigh. He wasn't surprised to see Claude standing before him. Rather, what did surprise him was the rather nice suit he held in his hands. Ciel stared at it and the sense of unease came back.

"Well," Claude said, breaking the silence. "Are you going to let me in or not?"

Ciel shook his head. "I shouldn't, all things considering but I suppose I should. I don't think Sebastian would like it very much if I slam the door in your face," he said and stepped to the side. "Although I have a feeling that you probably have a key."

Claude smirked and shut the door behind him. "You would assume correctly." He looked around the entryway. "So where's the old man?"

"He's in the shower and I don't know why you call him that," Ciel said as he walked further into the apartment. "You're older than him."

"He takes ages to answer the door," Claude responded and hung up his suit on the coat rack. "So I call him old."

Ciel eyed him warily. "Maybe he only takes that long to answer the door because he knows it's you on the other side," he said dryly.

Claude waved a hand as he flopped down on the couch. "Impossible. I'm adorable." He watched as Ciel sat down and he leaned forward, arms resting on his knees. "But all joking aside, how are you two holding up? I know he's a self-pretentious bastard at times, but other than that?"

He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. Blue eyes darted to the ground and Ciel weighed his options. He still believed that Claude didn't know about the disagreement the other day. If he could help it, he didn't want to let Claude know. Ciel liked his life, thank you very much. However, it didn't stop him from wanting to ask one of the biggest questions on his mind.

If anyone could help him understand Sebastian, it was Claude. The two had practically grown up together and were close friends. Claude, more than anyone else, would know how to handle the heavy stares and sympathetic whispers.

"Sebastian's great," Ciel started carefully. "He knows his way around the districts and he's been able to get us private tours to almost everything." He rubbed his arms even though he wasn't cold. Admitting all that Sebastian had done for him so far and then to turn around and treat him that way made Ciel feel agitated with himself.

"Told you he was the best," Claude said and looked pleased with himself. "He's a brilliant guy, don't tell him I said that though. He'll never let me live it down."

Ciel gave a hollow laugh and didn't bother to point out that Sebastian said the exact same thing about Claude. He swallowed and his eyes flickered up to Claude. "How," he started and felt the air shift around them. Even Claude noticed the change and sat up straighter. "How do you do it?"

"Do what?"

"Aren't you embarrassed to be seen with him?" Ciel whispered.

For several long minutes Claude stared at him and Ciel's toes curled into the fabric of the rug. He couldn't bring himself to look at Claude, too worried what he would see on his face. He doubted it would match the pained one he saw on Sebastian the other day, but he knew disappointment would etch its way across Claude's face.

Finally, Claude shifted and Ciel watched from the corner of his eye as long legs crossed over each other. "I'm not embarrassed," he said and Ciel slowly looked up at him. Claude had a neutral expression that Ciel didn't know how to take. "I've known Sebastian my whole life. Maybe when we first met, I felt awkward and a bit embarrassed. But I think most of the time, I thought he was cool. Sebastian can hear almost everything around him and then he has that amazing gift of his."

Ciel cracked a smile. "Yeah, I called it a superpower," he said and then his eyebrows furrowed. "What gift does he have?"

Claude gave him a sharp look. "He hasn't told or shown you yet?" Ciel shook his head and Claude grunted. "He will eventually. I'll let him surprise you with that one. You'll like it though."

"But how do you handle all the stares?" Ciel asked, pushing them back onto the original subject. "The pitying looks and the whispers?"

"I ignore them. As I imagine Sebastian does as well," Claude stated and leaned back in his chair. "If anything, I pity them for not knowing Sebastian the way I do. They'll never know what a great guy he is or how smart he is. They only see a blind man and draw their own conclusions. But they never stop to get to know him, so they'll never realize all the talents he has."

A nostalgic smile crossed Claude's face as he spoke. "They don't realize that even though he's blind, he's happy and has far more friends than most people have. And I mean real friends. Ones that actually care. Not the ones that you only talk to once every year or so." He cocked his head. "All these people would drop everything for him if he needed something. I know all this and more, and it helps me ignore the pitiful looks people give him. It comes with knowing yourself too."

Ciel ran a hand through his hair. "Yeah, I've started to understand that more myself," he said and rested his head in his hands. "God, I thought I was so much better than all this."

Claude chuckled. "You're still young."

"Not much younger than you," Ciel pointed out. "Only what, three years?"

"That's a big difference when it comes to maturing," Claude stated. "You're fresh out of college and I've been out for a while. It's given me more life experience than you. In theory at least." He grinned.

Ciel rolled his eyes and tilted his head to look at Claude. "So why are you here?"

Claude gave him a confused look. "Sebastian didn't tell you?" he questioned and frowned when Ciel gave a negative shake of his head. "Odd. He had planned this a day or two after your arrival. I'm surprised it slipped his mind."

Ciel didn't say anything and gnawed on his lower lip. He had a feeling he knew why Sebastian hadn't said anything. If he had to guess, Sebastian meant to tell him either yesterday or today, hoping to surprise him with whatever he had planned. "What did he have planned?" he finally asked.

"I should let him tell you." Claude said as he stood up and strolled over to Sebastian's door. "He seemed excited about it. At least he sounded that way to me."

Great, way to twist the guilt knife in deeper. Ciel clutched his hands together as Claude beat out a rhythm on Sebastian's door and even his childish actions couldn't work a smile on Ciel's face. It wouldn't take long before Claude discovered what had happened and Ciel was as good as dead after that.

He stiffened as the door opened and Ciel pressed himself into the cushions of the couch. He hoped to make himself look as small as possible, but it wouldn't stop Claude from spotting him the moment Sebastian told him what happened.

"Claude's here," Ciel said before Claude could say anything.

Sebastian sighed and ran a hand through his wet hair. "Seriously, Claude. I'm starting to think you have a vendetta against all the doors in my apartment. Or doorbells for that matter."

"You secretly like it. It's like our own secret code," Claude teased and crimson eyes rolled. Ciel mimicked the action. "But in all seriousness, we're still on for tonight, right?"

Sebastian nodded and ran the towel over his hair again to catch the stray drops. "Yeah. Hence the afternoon shower instead of an evening one."

Claude looked over his shoulder at Ciel and then back to Sebastian again. "You were planning on telling Ciel before we left, yeah?"

A thick silence stretched between them and Ciel tried to push himself back further into the couch. He could taste the unspoken words between himself and Sebastian in the air, bitter and rancid they made his mouth dry. Even Claude could sense the foulness that surrounded them and amber eyes darted back and forth between them.

"Ciel isn't going," Sebastian said after a few more seconds. His tone left no room for arguing and to Ciel, it felt like a slap across the face.

"What do you mean?" Claude questioned. "You planned this for him last week and even asked me if he could come because you thought he would enjoy it."

A small smile found its way on Sebastian's face and Ciel decided that he didn't like that smile. It wasn't the one that was usually on Sebastian's face during the past week they toured the city. "He's embarrassed," he said and shrugged his shoulders. "I don't want to ruin his trip so I figured it best if he stayed behind for this one."

Claude's eyebrow knitted together. "Embarrassed?" he asked. His mouth opened, ready to ask more but understanding flickered across his face. He turned to look at Ciel. "That's why you asked that earlier."

Ciel sunk in on himself, feeling his cheeks heat up and his ears burned under Claude's scrutiny. The secret was out now and nothing could bring it back. He would have to deal with the consequences. His defenses rose, ready to defend himself and Ciel's eyes narrowed as Claude went to move.

"When did this happen?" Claude asked and took a step closer to the couch.

"The other day," Sebastian answered lightly and shrugged. "I assume it stemmed from our trip to The Yards."

Claude glanced at him and Ciel nodded but didn't say anything. He already had troubles quelling the urge to defend himself and snapping at either of them wouldn't help the situation any. His eyes darted around the living room, trying to look at everything but Claude or Sebastian.

Finally, Claude turned his attention away from Ciel and focused on Sebastian. "So now you're going to use this as an excuse to lock yourself back in the apartment," he stated and crossed his arms across his chest. "That's not what we agreed on, Sebastian."

Sebastian's eyebrow rose slightly. "Yes, because dragging him outside with me makes things better, Claude," he drawled. "He's embarrassed to be seen with me. I'm not about to make it worse by continuing to take him places where everyone can see us together."

"Well sorry for feeling a bit uncomfortable with all the staring," Ciel snapped, unable to remain quiet any longer. "I don't exactly have experience in dealing with that and I think anyone would feel a bit awkward at first. Forgive me for being human."

"So you can be a human but I can't?" Sebastian asked, his voice cool. "Or because I'm blind, I'm not allowed to have the same human emotions as the rest of the populace."

Ciel scowled. "I never said that. But you can't go making me out as the only bad guy in all this. I'm just as much a victim as you are." He held his ground despite Sebastian's unwavering gaze. "I've never been in a situation like this before. You can't expect me to accept everything with the same ease as all your other friends show."

Sebastian nodded. "That's why I'm not going anywhere with you," he said and gestured vaguely with his hand. "This way you can see the sights that you want and still have a place to stay. I can stay here and you can go out without worrying about what people will think of you. This way everyone wins."

A snort escaped Claude's lips. "Don't think for a moment that I'm letting this slide." He jabbed a finger at Sebastian's chest and snapped his fingers on his other hand at Ciel. "I'm not about to let this thing continue for the remainder of Ciel's visit."

Sebastian pushed Claude's hand away. "And what do you expect to accomplish, Claude? Nothing will change."

"It will," Claude said and gripped Sebastian's shoulder tightly. "Because I'm not letting either of you leave until this problem has worked itself out. And I don't care if we don't leave for a few days."

"I refuse," Sebastian said flatly and dug his heels into the ground as Claude started to push him in the direction of the couch.

"As do I," Ciel spat. He wasn't in the mood to deal with this, not when he already felt defensive and guilty over everything.

Claude snorted and in a move that surprised both Ciel and Sebastian, slipped his arms down around Sebastian's waist and hoisted him off the ground. Sebastian made an undignified noise and scrambled for an anchor. Fear flickered across his face as he clawed at Claude's body and Ciel was on his feet instantly, shouting at Claude to put him down.

Claude deposited him heavily on the couch, a hand still resting on his shoulder. "Y'all are going to have a little talk," he said. "Ignoring this problem and dancing around each other isn't going to make things any easier. It's a bad environment to live in and it's only going to make things worse between y'all. I can only assume that y'all are tiptoeing around each other. Now tell me how helpful is that?"

Ciel didn't say anything but he couldn't deny the words. Avoiding Sebastian stressed him out and it had only been a day since their disagreement happened. He couldn't imagine dancing around him for the rest of the summer.

"It's worked before. And this way I can get my work done. I'm behind because of this plan of yours," Sebastian said and went to stand up.

"No," Claude said firmly and pushed Sebastian back down on the couch. "I did not invite the brat here just to have you take two steps back because both of y'alls prides are a little bruised."

Sebastian scowled but didn't try to move again, the only sign that he didn't really want to fight against Claude. If Ciel looked close enough, he could see the exhausted lines on Sebastian's face. The lines had faded over the past week since Ciel's arrival but it didn't take them long to return. He had a feeling that Sebastian hadn't slept much the two nights.

"I'll do it," Ciel said and Sebastian's head snapped to look at him. Surprise coated his expression before it softened into weary acceptance. The action made Ciel smile slightly. Despite the front that Sebastian put up about not caring, he truly did and wanted to make amends as much as Ciel.

"Fine," Sebastian said. He slumped against the couch and grabbed for the lightweight throw that draped over the back. He wrapped it around himself.

Claude grinned triumphantly. "I knew you two would see it my way." His hand slipped away from Sebastian's shoulder. "Now, I'm going to shower. Y'all play nice, you hear?"

Sebastian flicked him off and Ciel resisted the urge to do the same. He watched as Claude sashayed to Sebastian's room and slipped inside, closing the door behind him and leaving them alone.


	6. Opus 6

**A/N**: For those who weren't aware, FF's alerts were down for a little over a day and I think they're still working to get caught up. Hopefully this chapter posts without problem, haha. I hope y'all enjoy the chapter! Many, many thanks to **socialbutrfly1379 **for being my amazing beta again! She was awesome working on this story :3

**Warnings**: Language

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Kuroshitsuji

* * *

Left alone, Ciel could feel the tension rising between them again and Ciel smoothed out the fabric of his pants. "So," he started and his toes curled. He didn't know how to start the conversation and Ciel almost wished that Claude had stayed with them.

"It happened at The Yards, didn't it," Sebastian said and looked in his direction, eyes focusing more to his left than on Ciel's face. "That you started to feel uncomfortable."

Ciel nodded. "Yeah." He looked away from Sebastian, feeling the guilt start to rise again. A part of him wondered if he would ever come to terms with the feeling. "It happened after the maze. I ran into a child and they said some rather…perverse things."

Sebastian chuckled. "Kids are the worst, I find. They haven't learned that social filter and tend to speak whatever is on their mind." He shrugged. "Not that some adults are any better."

"I shouldn't have let it affect me that way," Ciel muttered and rubbed his arm. He took a deep breath and let it out forcefully. "But after he said that, I noticed all the stares wherever we went and I felt awkward."

Silence stretched between them again and Ciel rolled his lower lip between his teeth. It wasn't easy to admit that, let alone say it aloud. But he felt better after admitting it, as though the weight had at least temporarily lifted. It allowed him to breathe easier for a while and Ciel only hoped that it wouldn't come crashing down again.

"You have every right to act the way you did," Sebastian said and his eyes lowered to his hands. "I know about the staring that people do when I walk by. I've learned to ignore them and at times, I can forget they're even there. I'm used to it and so are my friends and family. But I tend to forget that other people aren't used to it as they are."

"It's not," Ciel started but drew the words back to himself. "I don't have a problem you being blind," he clarified.

A small smile flickered across Sebastian's lips. "I know that," he said softly. "Otherwise you wouldn't have stayed that first night. You just…you just acted like a human. And there's nothing wrong with that. I simply forget that at times."

Ciel blinked, uncertainty trickling through his body. "What do you mean?" he asked. Sebastian was a human as well but he didn't feel the need to point that out just yet.

"We – humans that is – always feel uncertain about things that are different or strange to them. We don't know how to act around them, what to say or do." Sebastian's fingers sought the edges of the blanket and pulled it closer, a sign that he felt just as uncomfortable about this as Ciel. "Just as there are times that you feel uncomfortable being around me, there are times that I feel anxious about other people."

"You never look that way though," Ciel said, truly surprised to hear Sebastian admit that. Never once did Sebastian look uneasy during Ciel's stay.

Sebastian winked at him. "I've had a few decades to practice my poker face," he said with a grin. "When I was younger, I felt awkward around other people who could see. Too worried about what they would think about me and potentially embarrassing anyone who was with me at the time. It took several years before the feeling faded. Only on rare occasions do I start feeling that way."

Ciel shook his head and gazed at Sebastian. "I never would've guessed," he murmured, glad to have a small bridge of similarity between them.

It made sense though once Ciel thought about it. Everyone felt nervous when faced with a new situation, whether they could see it or not. If anything, it made more sense for Sebastian to feel uncomfortable since he couldn't see the things around him.

"So just as I felt uncomfortable with the stares, you felt the same because you didn't want to embarrass me," Ciel clarified, the words tasting bitter in his mouth.

Sebastian nodded. "I'm finely attuned to people around me. I can tell by their tones when something is wrong or hear when they become tense. The voice pitches in different ways and the body reacts as well." He cocked his head. "You walked lighter after the maze, as though you didn't want to draw attention to yourself. And you sounded distracted. Probably looking around at everyone, if I had to guess."

Ciel groaned and ran a hand over his face. "Great, now I feel like a grade A jerk," he mumbled.

"Why do you say that?" Sebastian asked and made a move to stand up but thought better of it. The blanket slipped a little over his shoulders and he shrugged it back up.

"This whole time you felt just as awkward as me but for different reasons. And you were trying your best not to embarrass me," Ciel stated and clenched his fingers into fists. "Then I went and treat you like this. What kind of person does that make me?" he spat, disgusted with himself once more.

Sebastian sighed slightly. "You did nothing wrong, Ciel," he said and debated with himself before gesturing for Ciel to join him on the couch.

Ciel shuffled over and sat down heavily next to him. He jumped when Sebastian reached for his hand and found it after a few missed tries. "What?" he started, but Sebastian shushed him as he lifted up their hands. Their palms pressed together and their fingers lined up, spreading out slightly.

"There, just as I thought," Sebastian said. "You're a human."

Ciel's eyebrows furrowed. "I could've told you that," he said and their hands dropped back down. "You keep saying that. I don't understand what you're trying to prove with it."

Sebastian smiled. "You're human," he repeated. "And as a human, you reserve the right to feel frustrated with things. As do I. That's why I'm telling you that you did nothing wrong. I get frustrated with people who treat me like a child and always try to do everything for me. I hate it, because I'm able-bodied and I know that. But I tend to forget that other people, especially those that I just met, don't know that."

He looked to the side, glancing out the window as he continued softly. "More than that, I get frustrated when people don't understand. I get used to Claude and my other friends understanding certain things about me. So when someone new doesn't comprehend the situation, I feel annoyed." Lips quirked. "I wonder why they act the way they do and why they feel so skittish around me. Because I never stop to remind myself that it's a new situation for them."

Ciel didn't say anything, but he knew the familiar feeling that Sebastian felt. He experienced it far too much in the past few days, only his frustration remained aimed at Sebastian. He didn't know how many times he wondered why Sebastian didn't understand how he felt and ended up feeling mad at him.

It was enough to drive a person crazy and Ciel almost wanted to laugh at the position they had put themselves in.

"I know," Ciel said finally. "I know how you feel."

Sebastian turned back to him. "I imagine you felt the same way to me," he said. "We're both frustrated at the other and ourselves."

Ciel laughed, unable to help himself. "We're a right pair, aren't we?"

"We're human," Sebastian stated. "We both acted in a way that felt right and what we believed was right. It's not easy to admit you're wrong but in this case, I don't believe either of us are to blame. At least wholly."

"We were both right and wrong," Ciel said and drummed his fingers along his thigh. "We handled it without thinking of the other's position."

Sebastian reached out and stopped the fidgeting fingers. He held them for a brief second before removing his hand and Ciel trembled at the touch. "Something else bothers you."

Ciel remained silent as he sorted through his thoughts. The previous guilt he felt had started to ebb away, much to his surprise. Hearing Sebastian admit that he was also at fault helped more than he expected and it soothed the majority of his frustration. The only thing that remained now was the feelings regarding himself.

He still felt annoyed with himself for acting that way towards Sebastian in the first place. Wasn't he an educated person? One that should know right from wrong and how best to act in situations such as this. Being a human – as Sebastian kept pointing out – didn't have anything to do with this, or so Ciel felt.

Instead, it was something that rested firmly on Ciel's shoulders alone. He didn't uphold to the morals he had set for himself and it irked Ciel. If he couldn't do something as simple as this – treating Sebastian with respect compared to shying away from him or treating him as though he was some rare specimen – then how would he handle other problems that arose in life?

"I'm frustrated still," Ciel started and ran a hand through his hair. He went to drum his fingers again but Sebastian quickly stopped him and the touch helped soothe his frayed nerves. "I'm frustrated at myself."

Sebastian frowned slightly. "How so?"

"Because even though I knew better, I still gawked at you when I first saw you and I couldn't stop feeling surprised at when I saw you do something. Like when you cooked breakfast or dressed yourself." Ciel shook his head. "I felt so amazed and stunned to see you doing everyday things. I never should've thought that way in the first place."

He took a breath and blew it out with an aggravated sigh. "And even after that, I let the words of someone else sway me and make me treat you like a diseased man." Ciel's fingers twitched under Sebastian's hand in a nervous gesture. "I thought I was better than this, Sebastian. I have a college degree. I graduated with honors even. But it didn't mean anything when I met you. I met you and everything I had learned flew out the window."

Sebastian looked as though he wanted to laugh but held back for Ciel's sake. "Ciel, what does having a college degree have to do with anything?"

Ciel grunted. "It meant that I'm an educated member of society," he said. "That I made it through all the years of schooling in my life and have something to show for it."

"Schooling doesn't help you that much with social situations such as this," Sebastian said carefully. "The lessons you learned from your parents and your own life experience help you prepare for life. Your parents and teachers can't teach you everything. Some lessons in life are best learned as you go."

Ciel gripped his leg and Sebastian's hand pulled it away with a firm tug. "But my parents taught me better than this," he almost shouted. "And to make it worse, a part of me still feels uncomfortable going out with you. I hate feeling like this, Sebastian."

A surprised noise left his mouth as Sebastian pulled him forward and into a warm embrace. He stayed tense in Sebastian's arms, unsure what was going on. The tenderness that surrounded him offered comfort and Ciel's mind and body warred against each other. He wanted to melt into the comforting embrace but he also wanted to push away. He didn't deserve this.

"I forgive you, Ciel," Sebastian murmured. "But you have to forgive yourself as well."

Ciel shook his head, Sebastian's hair tickling his nose. "I can't. How can I?"

Sebastian made a noncommittal sound. "You're not wrong, feeling this way. It's natural, I promise. I didn't make things any easier for you either, treating you the same way I treat Claude and expecting the same from you in return. And I'm sorry for that, Ciel. It wasn't right of me." He paused. "But you can't continue to think that you were wrong. You acted as you should."

"How so?" Ciel mumbled, his head spinning. He felt dizzy and confused, but at the same time, Sebastian's apology made him feel better. He didn't think Sebastian was the one who needed to apologize, but he accepted it and felt better for it.

"Because even though your parents taught you right from wrong, you still can't help your reaction when you saw me," Sebastian said. "You also know what society tells and shows you. To those who don't know, a blind person is someone who can only do a limited amount of things on their own. You simply followed what was told to you."

Ciel scoffed. "Not helping," he pouted and hissed in pain when Sebastian smacked him upside the head. "What was that for?"

"Because now you're just feeling sorry for yourself," Sebastian said, but his voice lacked any bite. "There are things that only experience or certain encounters can teach you. This is one of them and that's why I'm telling you that you did nothing wrong."

Blue eyes closed and Ciel leaned further into Sebastian's body. The words slowly sunk into his conscience, repeating themselves until they firmly grasped him and made sure Ciel understood their meaning. He cradled them close, listening to and accepting their meaning. A small part of him still doubted the words but with Sebastian's gentle reassurance, it slunk back to the farthest crevice of his mind.

"I understand," he said, voice muffled by the blanket around Sebastian's shoulders. "I'm going to strive to do better though. I want to overcome this and become the person I thought I was."

Sebastian nodded. "And that's a sign of your maturity. I believe you're closer to the person you thought you were than you think." He smiled. "I'll also try my best to remember that not everyone feels at complete ease with my situation as Claude and others do."

Ciel laughed as he leaned back from Sebastian and he realized that it was the first time he had laughed, let alone smile, since the previous day. He felt as though he could breathe easier again and the heavy pressure on his chest lifted.

Ciel reached for Sebastian's hand. "You have a deal," he said.

They shook hands and Ciel let out a loud sigh. Sebastian mimicked the noise, sending them both into light-hearted laughter and the tension that once carpeted the apartment lifted like a cloud. It faded from the air and moved on, leaving them free and without worry. The previous warm atmosphere that Ciel felt when he first arrived came back on a light breeze.

Their laughter slowly trickled away, leaving a comfortable silence in its wake. The traffic moved by outside at a steady pace and Ciel shifted on the couch, feeling the previous question resting on the tip of his tongue.

"So, what's going on tonight?" he asked.

Sebastian hummed and turned around as a bell jingled behind him. Soot neatly jumped onto the armrest, standing up on her back legs to butt her head against Sebastian's chin. "I had planned to take you somewhere," Sebastian said as he reached for the crying cat. "It's not too late if you'd still like to go."

"Where are we going?"

A pleased grin spread across Sebastian's lips. "The symphony house," he said. "I wanted to take you there on a night they played a certain piece and give you a tour before the show started. That's why I didn't take you there before. Saved the best for last."

Ciel chuckled. "You only say that because you know it the best and you work there."

"Of course," Sebastian said as Soot licked his fingers. "If you're proud of something, you're not afraid to claim it's the best."

Ciel rolled his eyes but didn't deny the words. "When do we need to leave?" he asked.

Sebastian flipped Soot onto her back, drawing a disgruntled look from her. "Around five," he said. "The show starts at seven, but it gives us plenty of time to tour the building and eat a light dinner before it begins."

"I assume it's a black tie event sort of thing?" Ciel questioned and he looked in the direction of where Claude hung up his suit earlier. He glanced back at Sebastian, wondering what he would look like in a nice suit or a tuxedo for that matter. The image painted in his mind made him hum appreciatively and he silently hoped he would get to see Sebastian in one.

"Claude said he would bring you a suit," Sebastian said, indirectly answering the question. "One of his co-workers has a younger brother around your size and said we could use it for tonight."

A low grunt left Ciel's mouth and he stood up. "I hope it's clean," he said and walked over to the coat rack to examine the suit in question. "And speaking of Claude, where is he? It doesn't take that long to take a shower."

Sebastian frowned and turned to look over the back of the couch. "He's probably listening to us from the bedroom. Either that, or snooping through my things." He stood up and made his way to the bedroom. "The one good thing about being blind, if he's naked, I don't have to worry about it."

Ciel laughed and hung back as Sebastian opened the door. Sebastian might not be able to see Claude, but Ciel could and he would rather not have that image stuck in his head. He shuddered at the thought and continued to examine the suit. The fabric looked like good quality and a tag from the dry cleaners remained attached to the sleeve with a pin.

It made him feel better about wearing it and with a satisfied nod, Ciel turned his attention back to where Sebastian had vanished. He hadn't heard any shouts from inside the room but he ventured forward with caution.

"Everything okay in there?" he called as he approached the open door.

"Define okay," Sebastian answered, voice muffled but annoyed.

Ciel bit his lip. "He's dressed at least, right?"

Sebastian snorted. "Oh, he's dressed all right."

Curiosity piqued, Ciel peeked around the corner. The bedroom was empty and he took a careful step forward. Another open door near the corner of the room caught his attention and he heard people shuffling around inside. He headed over, still worried about what he would find and peered into the closet, finding Sebastian and Claude standing inside.

"Nice closet," Ciel said and looked at all the clothes in awe.

"That's what I keep telling him," Claude exclaimed and pivoted slightly on his heels, admiring himself in the mirror. "But will he let me borrow any of his things? No," he said, dragging out the vowel.

Sebastian clicked his tongue. "Because they don't fit you. Much to my chagrin, I'm shorter than you and I'm nowhere near as broad as you are."

Claude stiffened. "Are you calling me fat?"

A smirk split Sebastian's lips. "Isn't that the stereotype? That all cops eat donuts and are a little…stout?"

"It's muscle!" Claude proclaimed and flexed in the mirror. "All that is pure muscle baby. Hannah wouldn't want it any other way."

Ciel cocked his head. "Hannah?"

Sebastian turned to him. "His girlfriend."

"This creature has a girlfriend?" Ciel asked, stunned by the revelation.

"Hey," Claude said and turned around to face them fully. "What's this, gang up on Claude day? After all that I've done for you two, you'd think y'all would show me a little more appreciation."

Sebastian chuckled. "You're right, Claude," he purred and stalked closer. "Let me show you my appreciation."

Claude flushed and quickly grabbed Sebastian's shoulders, holding him away at arm's length. "As attractive as you are, Sebastian –and I mean that in the most heterosexual way, from friend to friend – you know what happened last time you tried to show your appreciation through bodily means."

"Do tell," Ciel said, his eyebrow cocked slightly.

"Sebastian offered to share his bed with me the night he moved in, because the couch at the time was hard as a rock," Claude stated and red blossomed up the back of Sebastian's neck. "He turned me into a human teddy bear. Someone likes to cuddle."

The flush burned deeper on Sebastian's skin. "It was cold and we had a few drinks," he protested.

Claude glanced over Sebastian's shoulder and winked at Ciel. "Of course," he said and turned back to Sebastian. "But it didn't stop Hannah from finding us that way in the morning and wondering what the hell happened."

Ciel snickered and could only imagine the chaos that ensued after that morning. "Obviously everything worked out though. You're still together with her, although I can't imagine anyone wanting to put up with you."

"I should take that suit back, ungrateful brat," Claude said and released Sebastian. "Honestly, if this is the thanks I get," he trailed off as he crossed his arms with a huff.

Sebastian shook his head. "I'll see what I can do," he said and patted Claude's shoulder. "You know I appreciate the things you do for me."

A snort. "You have a funny way of showing it," Claude said but the light tone in his voice gave him away.

"Yes. Now please take off my clothes. You're probably stretching out the fabric or ruining the seams," Sebastian stated. "Also, don't think I didn't notice that you snooped on my computer."

Claude sputtered. "I did no such thing," he proclaimed.

Sebastian rolled his eyes. "The chair was warm when I came in," he said and gave him a pointed look. Claude simply shrugged, unable to hide the fact any longer. "I take it you found what you were looking for?"

"I did," Claude said proudly and leered at Sebastian. "I noticed that your collection of porn has grown."

"Out!" Sebastian snapped and started to push at Claude while Ciel laughed from the entranceway.

Claude dug his heels into the carpet. "Come on, Sebastian. We're all guys here and we all have needs. There's no shame in it."

"I have some, too," Ciel stated, unable to stop himself or the smile from crossing his face.

"There, see," Claude said. "No one here will judge you," he cooed and Sebastian let out an exasperated sigh. Claude simply patted him on head, making Sebastian scowl even more.

Ciel chuckled to himself as Sebastian batted Claude's hands away and demanded that he change. He tuned them out and pivoted slightly to look at the computer in question.

He didn't have any doubt that Sebastian felt the same sexual desires as him but it was a place Ciel firmly tried to avoid. Now though, Ciel couldn't stop the thoughts. He wondered what Sebastian looked like in the throes of ecstasy, face flushed and hair mused as he sought completion. The thoughts made Ciel blush as arousal raced through his body. His imagination peaked, sweeping him away and carrying him further into the dream until he lost himself in it.

Imagining the way long fingers would glide down pale skin, slicked with a thin sheen of sweat, touching ever so lightly like a feather. The way Sebastian's eyes would look when aroused, pupils blown wide with lust and nearly devouring the crimson color that pulled Ciel in. And then to hear that sinful voice cry out in ecstasy when the peak crashed down around them.

Ciel shuddered violently and swallowed the moan that bubbled in the back of his throat. His pants felt tighter and he shifted uncomfortably as he tried to calm his body.

This was Sebastian, he reminded himself.

He shook his head, what did that have to do with anything? Sebastian had a nice personality and was attractive. What was wrong with feeling something for him? Anyone would want someone with Sebastian's qualities.

_But he's blind_, a traitorous voice whispered somewhere in the back of his mind_._ _Can you see yourself with him when he's blind?_

Ciel slammed a door on the thoughts, firmly shutting them away from the rest of his mind before they had a chance to grow. He refused to let himself think that way and let a wall build between them again. They had just worked to tear it down not even half an hour ago. He wouldn't let it rise again. Not after all the progress they made.

He turned back to look at Sebastian again, simply watching Sebastian and Claude interact. Was it so bad to picture himself with Sebastian? They got along well, with the exceptions of the few small bumps along the way. But didn't every relationship or friendship have something like that?

He hummed and closed his eyes, trying to picture it. Was Sebastian someone he could see himself with? It proved hard to envision at first, as Ciel had only known Sebastian for a little over a week, but he couldn't deny the attraction between them. Nor could he ignore the way Sebastian put him at ease when they were together.

Blue eyes opened, dispelling the image in his mind but not the warmth that had spread itself through his body. Ciel played with dangerous fire; he knew that. He didn't even know what Sebastian thought about him, yet he allowed himself to fantasize for a brief moment. Not only that, but Sebastian probably thought he was straight.

Ciel sighed and ran a hand through his hair. Too much had happened already today and pondering his current train of thought didn't make things easier. It made his head spin once more and threatened to start a pounding headache. It was probably best to let things lie and just forget about them.

At least for now.

"Are you two done flirting?" he asked, breaking up the conversation between Sebastian and Claude.

Sebastian glanced at him. "You're always welcome to join us," he teased and winked at him.

Claude snorted. "Please, I'm sure that's the last thing he wants."

"Who knows," Ciel said as he took a further step into the closest. "Maybe I want to take your place as a human teddy bear."

Claude stared at him and Ciel calmly held the gaze. Amber eyes searched him, looking for something and Ciel watched as the points started to form behind Claude's eyes. He waited patiently for him to connect them and Ciel smirked as Claude's mouth parted into a neat 'O' and his eyes widened behind thin glasses.

"Holy shit," he said and brought his hand up to his hair. Fingers tangled through the bangs and he took a step back, as though he the realization was too much to bear. "This whole time, you…"

"Yes?" Ciel pressed and chanced a look at Sebastian. His face looked amused, if not pleasantly surprised at the same time. At least this was one way to tell Sebastian about his sexual preference. A small stepping stone.

Claude's hand fell to his side. "Well I'll be damned. I really am a good judge of character," he said with a laugh. "How appropriate of you to join us in Sebastian's closet then." He snickered at the joke.

Sebastian sidled up to Claude's side. "You're in the closest too, Claude."

"So I am," Claude murmured and neatly slipped away. "And now I'm not. I'll leave you two to talk while I get dressed. We should get ready to leave soon."

"We would've been ready soon if someone hadn't decided to play dress up," Sebastian mumbled under his breath and grunted when a pair of pants smacked him in face.

Ciel scowled and turned his back to Claude. "I really could've done without seeing Claude in his underwear," he said and shuddered. For all his precautions, he still managed to see something he didn't want to see. He turned back to Sebastian, watching as he smoothed out the pants. "Do you need help with that?" he asked.

Sebastian nodded. "Could you hand me the top that goes with this?" He ran a hand over the seams, checking for any damage before deeming them fine.

"Sure," Ciel said and bent over to grab the discarded top. He shook out the wrinkles and passed it over to Sebastian, the fabric rustling lightly in his hands.

The hanger passed through the neck of the shirt and Sebastian fiddled with the buttons as silence filled the closet. Finally, he slid the hook onto the rack and brushed his hands over the other hanging clothes. "I didn't expect that about you," he said quietly.

Ciel shifted his weight. "It's not something I usually go around flaunting."

"I know," Sebastian said.

"I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable," Ciel stated, unnerved by the quiet that seemed to overtake Sebastian. Did it mean that Sebastian wasn't interested despite Ciel's preference? The thought hurt more than it should and Ciel gnawed on his lip.

Sebastian shook his head. "It's not that. I'm just surprised," he admitted. "I mean, honestly, what are the odds?"

He laughed and Ciel found himself joining in. It felt surreal and helped brush aside some of the doubt Ciel had earlier in his mind. When they were like this, Ciel craved more from Sebastian, despite only knowing him for a short while. But they had several more weeks together. Plenty of time to get to know each other.

And Ciel was just fine with that.

"We should probably get ready," he said. "I'm anxious to see this concert that you're so excited about."

Sebastian flashed him a grin, a little too far to the right but Ciel found it endearing in a way. "You'll get to see it soon enough. Why don't you get the suit from Claude so you can get dressed? We can leave after everyone is changed."

Ciel nodded and left the closet, chuckling at himself as he went. He eyed the bed as he left, wondering what it would be like to sleep on it with Sebastian. Somehow, he had trouble picturing Sebastian as someone who liked cuddling. Although considering how much he doted on Soot, perhaps it wasn't that hard to imagine.

He grabbed the suit off the rack and made his way upstairs so he could change. He could hear Claude moving around downstairs in the kitchen, a sign that he had already changed and Ciel hurried to do the same.

It didn't take long to dress and Ciel ran a comb through his hair one last time before deeming himself ready. He tugged at the cuffs of the suit and then the bottom of the jacket. At least the suit fit him and the fabric wasn't itchy. Although he wasn't fond of wearing a suit in the dead of summer in the south.

"Looking good, kid," Claude said as he descended the steps. "I've got some shoes for you too. Had to guess on the size, but you'll only have to wear them for a short time. Once the show starts, you can kick them off."

Ciel grunted. "That doesn't seem very classy."

Claude shrugged. "No one will see you anyway. Hell, I even told Sebastian that we didn't need to dress you up because no one would see that high, but he didn't listen." He toed the nearby shoes. "I think he's just nervous if you ask me."

"How so?"

"Well, it's the first playing for this piece tonight and those are always the biggest ones," Claude stated. "Never know what people are going to think."

Ciel nodded as he slipped the shoes on. They pinched a little at his toes but they would hold up until the concert started. He straightened up and smoothed out the suit again as Sebastian walked into the foyer area. His eyes darted over him appreciatively, confirming his earlier thoughts that Sebastian would indeed look stunning in a tux.

"You tie is crooked," he said. "May I?"

"Please," Sebastian answered. "I can never get the damn thing right."

Ciel chuckled and he moved forward to fix the tie. The silky fabric felt smooth against his fingers and Ciel carefully smoothed out the tie after straightening it. He could feel Sebastian's heart beating strongly underneath the layers of clothes and let his hand linger a moment longer before pulling away. "There," he said.

Sebastian gave him an appreciative smile. "Thanks. Shall we then?"

"How are we getting there?" Ciel asked as Sebastian ushered them outside. He winced against the setting sun and watched as Sebastian slipped his sunglasses on his face.

"I'm driving," Claude answered and walked over to the parked car. "It's not far, but wearing a black suit in this heat isn't advisable."

Ciel silently agreed. Already, he could feel sweat prickling along his forehead and beading on his upper lip. It felt uncomfortable and he resisted the urge to tug at his collar. A quick look at Sebastian proved that he looked just as uncomfortable. At least he wasn't alone in this.

They piled into the car and pulled away from the curb. Ciel watched the buildings sweep by as they moved away from the apartment and further down into the Arts District. Familiar buildings came into view and Ciel found himself admiring the architecture once more. He recognized most of them thanks to Sebastian's tour when he first arrived and he appreciated them even more.

The car moved in a smooth arc around a corner and it wasn't long before Claude pulled into a parking lot. Ciel stared at the building before climbing out of the car, taking in the sweeping lines that made up the architecture. The centerpiece looked more like a large rectangle but the surrounding areas helped offset the straight lines.

"I think this is the closest I've seen the symphony building," Ciel said as he slammed the door shut. "Sebastian always kept me away from it, saying it wasn't important."

Claude laughed. "And that couldn't be further from the truth. But he had good reason to lie, didn't you, Sebastian."

Crimson eyes rolled but Sebastian didn't say anything as he led the way to front of the building. Other finely dressed people milled around the entrance area of the building and Ciel looked at them briefly before hurrying to catch up with Sebastian. Their eyes followed them, but their looks weren't ones of pity, rather elation.

The stares vanished once they stepped inside the front doors and Ciel sighed in relief as the cooler air in the building rushed over him. He glanced around, taking in the interior as a neatly dressed man approached them. He pushed up his glasses and Ciel felt Claude stiffen next to him.

"That's William, one of Sebastian's worst critics," he said lowly. "They get together like oil and water."

"Nice to know," Ciel muttered and watched as William approached Sebastian, like a lion to a wounded animal.

He smirked. "Michaelis, pleasure to see you again. It's been far too long," he purred.

"Spears," Sebastian answered just as sweetly but Ciel could hear a frosty undertone in his voice. "I hope you'll enjoy the concert today."

"You know I won't," Will said and gripped the binder in his hand tighter, all pretenses fading from his face. "I'm going to drag you under the bus tonight, Michaelis."

Sebastian gave him a tight-lipped smile. "I expect nothing less from you."

He sniffed and glanced over Sebastian's shoulder, his eyes dragging over Claude and Ciel. "I see you have a new pet. Hopefully your demonic tones haven't fully corrupted him yet."

Ciel bristled. "Is that really necessary?" he asked, unable to help himself anymore.

Will pushed up his glasses. "Without a doubt. He's a demon." He glanced at Sebastian. "I look forward to writing your review tonight."

Sebastian smirked. "I look forward to reading it come morning," he answered. His smile faded as Will's footsteps faded and he growled lowly. "I hate that man."

"Why did he call him a demon?" Ciel questioned, finding the statement wholly uncalled for.

"Because he's known as the demon composer," Claude stated as Sebastian drifted away from them in an attempt to find the building manager. "His music has a way of stealing away your senses, if you will. The notes capture you and take you away somewhere else, away from your body without your consent. Like a demon stealing a soul. Another critic, Angela, first coined the term. William and Angela are two peas in a pod."

Ciel scoffed. "I'm not looking forward to meeting her then if she's anything like William." He crossed his arms over his chest. "What's wrong with letting the music take you away?"

Claude shook his head. "To them, music is something pure and clean. It should surround you but not touch. They believe that you should remain in control of your senses while you listen so you understand the notes." He rolled his eyes. "Sebastian's music, they claim, takes you away from the pure notes and to a place where you can't appreciate the music."

"That's bullshit," Ciel spat, feeling his defenses rise. How dare they think that about Sebastian's compositions? The thought made Ciel sputter to a stop and he turned to look at Claude, eyes wide. "Wait. Then the concert we're listening to tonight is...," he trailed off, excitement bubbling low in his chest at the thought.

A low chuckle left Claude's mouth. "I wondered when you would connect the dots. Took you long enough, kid."

Ciel huffed but Sebastian's return kept him from snapping at Claude. "The musicians are starting to set up but they said we're welcome to tour the building before the concert starts," Sebastian said. "The conductor wants to speak with me before they start as well, so we'll have to start with the stage first."

"We'll get to go on stage?" Ciel asked as they started walking. Their footsteps echoed throughout the seemingly empty building and his head kept twisting around to look at everything around them.

"Of course," Sebastian said. "And the backstage as well. I promised I would give you a tour, didn't I?"

Ciel flushed. "Yeah, but I didn't think I would get a tour like this. Maybe a simple one but nothing extravagant like this." He shook his head, still finding it hard to believe that he was here. "And you didn't tell me we would go and see one of your concerts."

Sebastian laughed as he pushed open a door to the first floor and rows upon rows greeted them. "You never asked," he stated as they started to walk down the aisle. The large stage loomed at the end of the aisle and further behind it, a beautifully orchestrated organ graced them with its splendor. The pipes gleamed under the soft lighting and they stretched high into the air, like fingers reaching for the stars.

"Still could've told me," Ciel grumbled under his breath.

"He wouldn't though. He's actually modest about his works, even though he's an ego-centric bastard," Claude said behind him. The comment earned him the middle finger from Sebastian and he simple chuckled. "Beautiful isn't it," he said and gestured to the building.

Ciel nodded. "It is. I can see why Sebastian likes this place so much. It has a lot of character and history to it."

"It's like his second home," Claude stated and gestured to one of the rows of seats above them. "That's where we'll sit. Sebastian has a private box."

"Lucky," Ciel stated as they stopped in front of the stage.

The conductor turned around to greet them, enthusiastically shaking Sebastian's hand. She gestured for them to join her on the stage and Ciel wasted little time scampering up the steps near the side of the building. He didn't miss how her hand lingered on Sebastian's wrist after they finished shaking hands and he felt a touch of jealous trickle through his veins.

They leaned over the score as the conductor asked a few questions and Ciel meandered over to look at the page. He balked at the mass amount of notes that covered the white sheet. It went over his head and Ciel searched for the part for the cellos, wondering if he could understand anything there. A part of him itched to hold a cello again.

He looked up as several musicians made their way out onto the stage. They smiled at him before they went about setting up their stands and getting ready. Ciel shifted next to Claude, feeling awkward. This was Sebastian's world and Ciel felt like an intruder. Everyone here knew Sebastian and most waved at Claude as well.

His head jerked to the side as Sebastian touched his arm. Crimson eyes focused on him and in them, Ciel felt his unease slinking away. Even though Sebastian knew everyone, he didn't give them the same affectionate gaze and it reminded Ciel that Sebastian did all this for him.

"Sorry to keep you waiting. We have just enough time to tour the building before the show starts," Sebastian said and looked apologetic. "We'll have to wait until after to see the backstage, provided you're not tired after all this."

"It's fine," Ciel said and they started for the doors. "This is far more than what I expected."

Sebastian chuckled and led them through the rest of the building, giving Ciel time to soak in everything around them. The building was vast, spanning far larger than Ciel originally thought but it remained beautiful nonetheless. It brought about a sense of awe and a subdued peace that Ciel hadn't felt before at the other places they visited.

By the time they finished the tour, Ciel could barely contain himself as Sebastian led the way to their seats. He couldn't wait to see what the symphony hall had to offer when it filled with music. Already, the people that had once filled the hallway had started to make their way to their seats.

If Sebastian's blindness bothered anyone as he walked through the hallway, no one showed it. Instead, they murmured greetings when they passed and their eyes lacked the normal pitying stares that Ciel had seen a few days ago. It put Ciel at ease as they rounded a gentle curve and came to a stop a few feet later.

"Here we are," Sebastian said and reached out to brush the plate mounted on the wall. His fingers traced over the Braille lettering before nodding to himself. "Pick which seat you want, Ciel."

Ciel nodded and slipped inside the private room. He scanned over the available seats and quickly picked the one closest to the stage. He didn't want to miss a thing and he leaned over the railing to look out at the view below. "Wow," he breathed, watching as everyone moved about to find their seats.

He looked away briefly as Sebastian appeared next to him. They stood together quietly, Sebastian listening to the soft noise and Ciel watching the people. Ciel felt like a child again, wanting to point out everything that he could spot – from the different styles of dresses that the females wore to the way the men flicked invisible lint off their jackets. It amused him and he almost started describing everything to Sebastian.

He held back at the last second and instead sidled closer to Sebastian, feeling a touch shy. "Thank you for this, Sebastian. It's amazing."

A soft smile graced Sebastian's lips. "You're welcome," he said as the lights started to dim. "I hope you enjoy it."

"I will," Ciel said assuredly and took a seat on the other side of Sebastian. He peered out over the seats below them, eyes sweeping over the people as they settled in the plush cushions.

The conductor tapped the music stand with his baton and a muted hush washed over the building. Electricity filled the air and Ciel held his breath, waiting for the first note as the musicians readied their instruments.

"Close your eyes," Sebastian muttered quietly.

Ciel looked at him, noting that Sebastian had closed his eyes and on the other side of Sebastian, Claude's eyes had closed as well. He turned his attention back to the musicians and reluctantly shut his eyes. It felt strange and Ciel felt a pang of loss, knowing he couldn't see the musicians or conductor perform.

He had just started to debate opening his eyes again when the quiet around him shattered without warning. The music swelled and Ciel felt it suck the very breath from his lungs as the notes jerked him from his body. They pulled him along the staff and tossed him over the edge as the music continued to assault his senses while he fell.

It continued to grow, the notes coming faster and louder, building and mounting until Ciel's heart beat in tandem with the drums in the background. The notes gave one final rush and the music peaked. A mere breath of silence rushed over him, suspending Ciel in the air before the music swelled again, more passionate than before as the rest of the orchestra joined in.

And in the second wave of music, Ciel found himself flying.


	7. Opus 7

**A/N**: Again, for those who weren't aware, FF's alerts were down for a little last week. So if you didn't get an alert last week, you're a chapter behind! Many, many thanks to **socialbutrfly1379 **for being my amazing beta again! She was awesome working on this story :3

**Warnings**: Language

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Kuroshitsuji

* * *

Ciel stretched out on the couch, watching Soot's tail flick back and forth as she napped on Sebastian's stomach. How it continued to move even though she remained asleep, Ciel didn't know, but he found it entertaining. Occasionally, her ears twitched but it wasn't enough to wake her. Ciel was sorely tempted to blow on them and see if that would wake her up, but he restrained.

Instead, he turned his attention to Sebastian. His hand curled around Soot's body, almost cradling her rump as he slept. They made an endearing sight and Ciel couldn't help the small smile that flickered across his lips as he watched them.

He wasn't surprised that Sebastian had fallen asleep. They had opted to stay inside and relax after a rather strenuous day yesterday. They had spent the morning at the aquarium and then went to the thrill park after that. They didn't return until late afternoon and Ciel had promptly collapsed in bed.

Sebastian though, had a meeting at the symphony hall and left almost immediately after they returned. Ciel felt bad for dragging Sebastian out when he had work to do that night, but Sebastian reassured him that he wasn't bothered. He had fun, Ciel knew that much, but seeing the dark bags under Sebastian's eyes this morning had him suggesting that they stay inside.

Sebastian didn't argue and after breakfast, took it upon himself to fall back asleep on the couch. Soot quickly found her own napping spot soon after that, leaving Ciel alone.

However, the quiet apartment gave Ciel time to relax and he shifted on the cushions. Around him, music drifted through the speakers – soft jazz this time, filled with the deep, reverberating pitches from the sax – and Ciel found the music soothing. It eased the remaining tension in his shoulders from yesterday and his eyes started to slide shut as well.

He snapped them open before sleep could overcome him and Ciel stood up with renewed energy. He circled around the couch and into the kitchen where he grabbed a mug from the cabinets. Ciel hummed as he carried it over to the little hot water heater and poured himself some water. He found it amusing that he knew Sebastian's apartment so well despite the fact that only three weeks had passed.

Ciel set the mug down and dipped the tea bag into the water, lost in thought. It was hard to believe that three weeks had passed already. It seemed like just the other day he had arrived and a thick wall stood between him and Sebastian.

The wall had all but vanished over the past week. After the concert last Wednesday, Ciel tried his best not to let the stares of other people affect him. It proved harder than he thought at first and at times, Ciel could feel his face warm when someone stared outright. But he liked to believe that he had made progress from before.

His hands curled around the hot mug and he carried it back into the living room. He placed the cup on the end table and made his way back to the couch that Sebastian slept on.

Sebastian looked peaceful when he slept; lips parted slightly as his chest rose and fell. The crease between his eyebrows that appeared on occasion had vanished, leaving Sebastian's face calm and he looked at ease with himself.

Ciel bent over and rested his forearms on the back of the couch as he watched Sebastian sleep. His breathing slowed to match Sebastian and his fingers twitched, wanting to trace the dark marks under hidden crimson eyes. They marred the pale skin but didn't take away from Sebastian's features.

He nibbled his lip before reaching forward and letting his fingers ghost along soft skin. Sebastian stirred and Ciel froze until he stilled once more. Ciel let out a long sigh and his fingers slipped down, tracing the curve of Sebastian's jaw. He yanked his hand away as he started to skim down the pale expanse of Sebastian's neck.

His heart pounded in his chest and Ciel sunk to his knees. A shaky sigh passed through his lips and his body trembled, unable to believe his bold actions. But he couldn't help the desire to stay near Sebastian, to touch and hold him. He shuddered again, the conflicting emotions starting to rise once more. One side telling him to accept Sebastian and the other reminding him that he was blind.

Ciel stood up abruptly, as though the action would dispel the thoughts. He crossed the living room and sat down heavily on the couch, rousing Soot from her sleep. She glared at him before stretching, arching her back and then turning her attention to Sebastian. She butted her head against his chin, purring loudly and Ciel smirked.

"If you don't wake up," he said as Sebastian groaned under his breath. "You'll never sleep tonight. And I think your cat will keep bothering you until you wake."

Sebastian pushed Soot's head away and blinked blearily at the ceiling. "What time is it?"

"A little after eleven-thirty," Ciel answered. "You slept for an hour and a half."

"Sorry," Sebastian mumbled and sat up, sending Soot jumping from his lap.

Ciel waved a hand and reached for a newspaper. "It's fine. I don't have any plans today and it felt good to relax. Sleep well?"

Sebastian nodded and stood up. "Very. Did you want to do anything this afternoon, or would you rather stay in for the rest of the day?" He shuffled into the kitchen, Soot at his heels.

"We can stay in," Ciel answered. "I'm nursing a sunburn from yesterday. So I'm content to stay inside for a while."

He flipped through the pages, stopping on one when a familiar name caught his attention. His eyes scanned the text and his eyebrows drew down while his lips pulled into a frown.

'_Composer Sebastian Michaelis, aka, the Demon Composer, greeted summer fans with a new score last Wednesday at Symphony Hall. Compared to his usual style, this most recent composition remained filled with nothing but stagnant notes and flat tones. Rumors have stated that Michaelis is in a rut of sorts and this writer has every reason to believe the rumors._

'_Michaelis derives his name as the Demon Composer by stealing the listeners away and taking them away from their seats. This, in and of itself, is a mockery to music – as the pure notes and tones from the instruments should never escape the listeners grasp and spirit people away. Regardless, Michaelis latest piece was, in short, embarrassing._

_It failed to connect with the listeners – in any form, either good or bad - and was truly the worst composition of them all. Certainly, the most fulfilling piece and note was the last one played, when the composition itself ended. That was the only time it drew on this writers emotions. That being the emotion of elation, because the horrible travesty had finally ended._

_William T. Spears is a writer and music critic with over ten years of experience in the music industry. To reach him…'_

Ciel fumed at the picture of Will and crumbled the paper. He didn't know what concert Will had listened to, but it surely wasn't Sebastian's. The music that night swept Ciel out of his seat and to somewhere he never knew existed inside his mind. The notes echoed deeply throughout his body until Ciel felt each one in his bones, setting him aflame with emotions.

William wouldn't know good music if it smacked him squarely in the face.

"Could you do me a favor, Ciel?" Sebastian asked from the kitchen.

"Depends on what it is," Ciel answered. "I won't help you dispose of a body, nor will I help you create an alibi. I know he's a bastard, but killing him will only make your life worse."

Sebastian laughed. "I assume you're talking about Spears," he said.

Ciel scoffed. "Who else?" he said and peered over the back of the couch. "That guy is horrible. I mean, did you read his review from the concert last week?"

"I did," Sebastian said calmly as he came into view. "I had Claude read it to me over the phone. We have a nice collection of them ever since he became my biggest fan. He went for a different approach this time. It was a refreshing change from all his others."

"How can you put up with him? For that matter, how can you act so calm when he's around and not want to punch his face in?" Ciel asked and gripped a pillow tightly to help quell his frustration. "Ugh, I want to punch him for you! That's how much he pisses me off."

Sebastian set the glass on the coffee table. "I appreciate your anger at the situation," he said and took a seat next to Ciel. "But I have a secret that makes it easier to deal with him."

"Do tell."

Sebastian cocked his head slightly with an amused smile. "It's easy, because I can't see."

Ciel frowned. "I don't understand," he said.

"I don't know what people look like," Sebastian said. "I mean, obviously I know the basic build but I'm talking features. The things that make a person, a person. Because I don't know what someone looks like, I can use my imagination to fill in the blanks. And that's not a good thing when you're someone like William Spears.

"I won't lie, Spears gets on my very last nerve and I'm not at all fond of him. For good reason. So I have no remorse when I picture him the way I do in my mind," Sebastian continued. "The created image comes to mind whenever we meet and it alleviates most of the frustration. When I see him in my mind, I can't help but smile.

Ciel's lips twitched. "What do you picture him as?"

Sebastian smirked. "A squat little man, shaped like a pear. Bald and no taller than my hips. He's usually dressed in a pink toga and waddles around like a duck."

Ciel slapped a hand over his mouth to stop himself from bursting into laughter. Soft chortles escaped between his fingers though and his shoulders shook with mirth. "That's…that's quite an imagination you have," he finally said, his voice squeaking in an attempt to hold back the laughter.

"I'll take that as a compliment," Sebastian said. "Just don't tell me what he really looks like and we'll be fine."

"Now that's all I'm ever going to see whenever I read one his reviews." Ciel made a face. "Or god-forbid, meet him again."

They laughed and Ciel reached for his mug. He took a sip of the tea, wincing as the still hot liquid slipped down his throat. He had always wondered how Sebastian viewed people. He set the drink down and shifted to look at Sebastian again. The question arose unbidden. What did Sebastian think he looked like?

If Ciel understood correctly, Sebastian only gave a negative image to the people he disliked. But what about the people close to him, like Claude or Victoria? Somehow, Ciel doubted that he imagined them the same way.

"What about other people?" Ciel asked.

"It depends," Sebastian answered. "I know what my friends look like. I ask them and then shape the image in my mind. I picture Claude and Victoria as very attractive people because of their personality. Other people may disagree with me, but that's simply the way I view them."

Ciel squirmed on the couch and his fingers toyed with the fringe on a pillow. "What," he started. "How do you see me?"

A low hum left Sebastian's mouth. "Well, I know you're shorter than me and that you're on the slim side. Those are the only solid facts that I know though. I imagine you're a little pale because you complained about the sun once." He glanced away and Ciel could see a touch of red appear on the back of Sebastian's neck. "But in my mind you're attractive."

"Thanks," Ciel mumbled, ignoring the flush that blossomed on his cheeks. "Can I tell you what I look like or would you rather keep your own image?"

"You can tell me," Sebastian said. "I've been curious for a while," he admitted.

Ciel nodded. "I'm about a head shorter than you, unfortunately." Sebastian chuckled. "I have short black hair and my bangs fall over my right eye most of the time. And my eyes are blue. My mom calls them a royal blue but they look like a normal blue to me."

He looked at Sebastian, trying to judge his reaction but crimson eyes remained closed. A faint smile touched Sebastian's lips though and Ciel took comfort in that.

"I have nothing to change about what I said earlier in regards to how you look," Sebastian said and reached forward. His finger brushed against Ciel's cheek and carefully traced the curve. Ciel shivered at the light touch. "Still attractive."

Ciel's breath caught in his throat and his heart thumped against his chest a little harder. If he didn't know any better, he would think that Sebastian was flirting with him.

His face erupted in heat and Ciel swallowed as Sebastian lowered his hand, mumbling a soft apology. "About that favor?" Sebastian questioned, changing the subject.

"Sure," Ciel said, pleased when his voice didn't waver. Just because Sebastian had changed the subject didn't mean Ciel could forget what he said. There was no denying that Sebastian was attractive. Ciel had always known that. What he hadn't known however was what Sebastian thought about him.

Now though, Sebastian had wholly admitted what he thought about Ciel and he found himself at odds with the situation. Could he see himself liking or even falling for Sebastian? The answer remained simple, yes. Ciel already liked Sebastian and his calm but quirky personality drew Ciel in more than any other had in the past.

But could he see himself liking or even falling for someone who was blind?

The question loomed large before Ciel, dark and foreboding. He had no problem with Sebastian or his blindness, but for some reason, a part of Ciel bulked slightly at the idea of possibly dating him. They couldn't do things a normal couple could and it would seem strange. Right? Then again, how did that make it any different from being friends with Sebastian?

As friends, they went out and did things together, and Ciel had yet to see anything of significant experience stop Sebastian. True, there were a few things he couldn't do, but that didn't define a relationship. A relationship was just a glorified friendship, wasn't it? So what made it any more different?

Ciel shook his head and rubbed his eyes with his palms. Sebastian came back to the couch and set a notebook in his lap. He glanced at it and flipped it open, looking at pages of blank staff. "What's this?" he questioned, glad for the distraction.

"I assume you know how to read music," Sebastian started as he sat down next to him and Ciel voiced his agreement. "If I tell you the notes to write, could you pen them on the staff?"

Ciel nodded. "Yeah, that sounds simple enough."

Sebastian hummed. "I usually go about this in a different way, but I wanted to try something new today."

"How do you usually write your scores?" Ciel asked, genuinely curious.

"I have a computer program to help with that," Sebastian answered. He gestured in the general direction of the piano, where a desk sat crammed into the corner next to it. Another portable keyboard sat on the surface of the desk. "I can play the piano parts directly on the keyboard and the program adds the notes as I go. For other instruments, I can use the program if I want or switch the instruments on the keyboard and go from there."

Ciel grunted. "You have two pianos, greedy bastard."

Sebastian laughed. "When I play for myself, I like the feel of my normal piano. The portable one gets the job done, but I grew up on the other one."

Blue eyes flickered back to Sebastian. "I'd like to see that one day," he said.

"Hmm?"

"See you playing," Ciel clarified. "Or composing. Preferably both."

A low chuckle left Sebastian's mouth. "Who's the greedy one now? And I'm about to compose something right now if you ever stop asking questions," he teased and Ciel flushed. "But I'll play something for you soon, and compose a piece on the computer."

"Thanks," Ciel murmured and picked up the pencil. "Ready when you are."

Sebastian nodded and started to recite the notes that only he could imagine. They came in a wide range and Ciel dutifully penned them in, drawing whole notes and eighth notes to the best of his ability. His quarter rest left much to be desired but he drew a rather nice looking eighth rest if he could say so himself.

The notes continued, placed carefully on the staff and accented with dynamics. They staggered themselves throughout the staff, turning the once blank page into a song. Black notes met with the black lines of the staff, spelling out the tune to a song and it only continued to grow under Ciel's hand.

The process continued, Sebastian reading the notes and Ciel jotting them down. He easily lost himself in the effortless pattern, finding the process simple but comforting. Sebastian's voice remained steady and calm, casting Ciel under his spell. It made him want to lean in closer to Sebastian, to rest against his shoulder while he wrote and simply enjoy the peace surrounding them.

He didn't move though despite the temptation and Ciel kept his eyes firmly on the page. By the time they finished, Ciel had covered two pages and had filled out the staff as best he could. His hand hurt from gripping the pencil so tightly and he gave it a small shake to loosen the sore muscles. He looked over the pages with pride and his fingers skimmed over what he wrote.

"Is that it?" he asked and bent over to clean up a few notes.

"That's it," Sebastian said and held out his hand. Ciel passed it back, rather reluctantly, and Sebastian closed it with a soft sound. "Thank you, Ciel. You helped me immensely."

Ciel fidgeted on the couch and he tried to recall the notes he had just written, hoping to grasp the tune. But the notes fled from his mind and Ciel glanced at the notebook. "Is that for a new composition?"

Sebastian looked down at the notebook where it sat in his lap. "Of sorts."

Ciel swore a slightly guilty look flickered across his face. Before he could ponder the expression any more, the phone rang and Sebastian stood up to answer it. Soft murmurs floated throughout the apartment as Sebastian talked on the phone and Ciel leaned back against the cushions as he tried to recall the notes again.

He looked up when Sebastian joined him on the couch again. "Are you up for a small excursion tomorrow?" Sebastian asked.

"What kind?" Ciel countered.

Sebastian smirked. "I believe you asked a while back about Oak Lawn."

Ciel made a quiet noise. "That's right, and you still haven't told me what it is." He poked Sebastian in his shoulder. "If you've held out on me, I'm not going to be happy," he teased.

A devious smirk crossed Sebastian's lips. "Just for that, I should take you tomorrow without telling you what it is." He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "It's one of the wealthier areas around here and is part of the Design District I took you to when you first arrived. It's also known for its gay community."

Ciel's mouth formed a neat 'O' and he felt his face heating up. No wonder Victoria suggested that Sebastian take him there. Now that he thought about it, she probably knew about his preference even though he didn't say anything. Cunning woman. He cleared his throat. "What's there to do?"

"There are plenty of shops to explore and you can look at the architecture," Sebastian scratched the bridge of his nose. "I have a friend who owns a club and he's been begging me to visit for months. He just called. Apparently he wants to celebrate my newest composition with a few other friends."

"Why haven't you gone before?" Ciel asked.

Sebastian sniffed. "I've been busy," he answered.

Ciel hummed, knowing an excuse when he heard one. He didn't call Sebastian out on it though and pondered the offer instead. "I've never been to a neighborhood like that before," he said after a while. "I think it would be interesting."

Sebastian nodded and leaned back into the couch, his eyes closed. "We'll take a bus up there tomorrow around one or so. That gives us plenty of time to look around and shop before the club opens." He grunted. "Pluto said he would put our names on the VIP list so we won't have any trouble at the door."

"How kind of him," Ciel said. He paused. "Are you going to fall asleep again?"

"Maybe," Sebastian answered, his tone amused.

Ciel grunted and smacked Sebastian's knee. "You make me sleepy just watching you." Sebastian smirked and slipped further down on the couch, almost kicking Ciel off the cushions. Ciel squawked and gripped Sebastian's legs. "Hey!"

Sebastian chuckled and held out his arms. "Come here," he said.

Ciel eyed him warily before shuffling forward. His body pressed against Sebastian's; hard but warm and he breathed in Sebastian's scent, a spicy cinnamon. "A little nap won't hurt you," Sebastian murmured.

"You are such a cuddler," Ciel complained, his voice muffled by the fabric of Sebastian's shirt. But he didn't pull away, too comfortable in Sebastian's embrace. "This is nice." Already drowsy, sleep came easy and overtook Ciel while his thoughts raced throughout his mind.

_I want more._

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

"You weren't kidding," Ciel said as they strolled down the wide sidewalk. The sun had already started to set, sitting low on the horizon, but it didn't hide the multicolored flags that hung from the buildings. He looked around more, watching as couples milled around them, some holding hands. It made Ciel smile and unbidden, his hand started to edge closer to Sebastian's.

He pulled away; face flushed and warm. He blamed it on the cuddling and nap session yesterday. Sebastian liked to cuddle far too much for his own good. And he put out heat like a mini furnace. But it didn't stop Ciel from feeling safe and loved when he woke in Sebastian's embrace.

"Pluto's club is just up ahead," Sebastian said, chasing Ciel's thoughts away. "I'll warn you now that he's very…touchy."

Ciel's nose crinkled and he had a feeling that Sebastian had worded that in the politest way possible. "Did he say if food was included with this VIP pass?"

"It is," Sebastian answered. "We'll have a private room in the back. Pluto knows that loud music and I don't mix."

Ciel cocked his head. "Why not?"

Sebastian looked at him. "I can't afford to ruin my hearing or lose it," he said. "Not only do I need it for my job, but I can't lose another sense. Especially this one."

"I didn't think about that," Ciel murmured.

"Most people don't."

Ciel didn't say anything else as they approached another building. A lone figure stood in the doorway and their eyes lit up as Sebastian came into view. "Sebastian!" he shouted and launched himself forward.

Sebastian grunted as their bodies collided and swore a few choice words before Ciel tugged him away from the stranger. "Who the hell are you?" he spat.

The man looked hurt, like a wounded dog. "I'm Pluto. Who are you?" he countered almost childishly.

"Ciel," he said and his hand tightened on Sebastian's wrist. "And did you have to practically attack him like that? I swear I heard his neck pop from the whiplash you gave him."

Pluto pouted and turned to Sebastian. "You didn't tell me he was your boyfriend," he whined and shot Ciel a cold glare. "Victoria said you were still single."

Sebastian sighed. "I'm still single. Ciel is just staying with me for a while, but he does have a valid point. You know I don't appreciate your surprise attacks." He ran a hand through his hair. "And we've talked about relationships before."

Pluto regarded Ciel for a moment while longer, sizing him up before turning his attention back to Sebastian. "I know," he said but he didn't look deterred by Sebastian's words. He linked his arm with Sebastian's and started forward. "I saved the far back room for our celebration. Only the best for you," he purred and leaned against Sebastian's side.

"You're going to make him trip," Ciel drawled as he trailed them, arms crossed over his chest. He glanced around the relatively empty club and he scoffed. "Where is everyone?"

"The club will open in an hour or so," Pluto stated as they walked down a private hall. "I can't stay long after the club opens, so I asked Sebastian to come early so I could see him."

"Charming," Ciel said dryly. He didn't like the man and hoped Pluto wouldn't stay around longer than necessary. Pluto acted too much like a spoiled child, clinging onto Sebastian and pouting whenever he didn't get his way. It made Ciel's lip curl and he wondered how Sebastian put up with him.

They stopped in front of the last room at the hall and Pluto opened the door with gusto. "Here we are," he crowed. "Everyone else will get here in a bit. Have a seat."

Sebastian's eyebrows furrowed as they entered the room. "Who else is coming to this party? You never said yesterday."

Pluto grinned. "Some friends," he said and guided Sebastian to a seat. "They should be here soon and then we can get started. It'll be like old times before you shut yourself up in your apartment. You stayed away for too long."

"For good reason," Sebastian stated and slapped Pluto's roaming hand away. "Go greet your guests so they're not standing outside."

"I suppose I should," Pluto muttered and reluctantly stepped away. "I'll be back in a bit. Make yourselves comfortable."

He vanished from the room and Ciel dropped down into the seat next to Sebastian. Silence settled around the room and Ciel took a few moments to compose his thoughts. He still didn't like Pluto, especially the way he acted towards Sebastian. "He's interesting," he said carefully.

Sebastian grunted and shook his head. "He's like an overgrown dog. Too affectionate and doesn't understand the meaning of personal space. And he's not afraid to hump your leg the first chance he gets." He sighed. "But he's a loyal friend, if not a bit too clingy."

"And he doesn't seem to understand the word no," Ciel stated and glanced at Sebastian curiously. "I noticed he's rather touchy and loving when it comes to you?"

"He's that way with many people. But for us, it's one-sided," Sebastian said and looked at him. "I like him only as a friend, and even then I can only take him in small doses. But I've told him before, several times actually, that that's all we'll be. Just friends."

Ciel snorted. "He didn't seem to listen."

Sebastian laughed. "I don't think he ever will. He's determined, but it gets old fast." He leaned back in the chair. "No matter how many times I tell him, he'll still believe that he has a chance or that I'll change my mind."

"It's like he's infatuated with you," Ciel said and his lip curled. "That's not healthy for either of you. I doubt a relationship would ever work out."

"Try telling him that," Sebastian chuckled and tilted his head. "But thank you for your concern."

Ciel flushed. "I never said anything about concern."

Sebastian shook his head. "You don't have to. I can hear it in your tone." He gestured at Ciel. "You sound defensive, but your anger isn't directed at me, but rather Pluto and the situation."

"How can you tell all that just by my voice?" Ciel questioned and shuffled closer to Sebastian. He felt the urge to stay next to him in case Pluto tried anything tonight. He wasn't about to let Sebastian out of his sight if he could help it.

"Your tone changes depending on the subject. When it is a simple question directed at me, your voice softens and you speak normal. But whenever Pluto comes into the conversation, whether you're talking about his disposition or just him in general, it turns rougher," Sebastian answered. "Just like now, your voice is calm and relaxed. It's how you usually talk with me. It's very soothing."

Ciel stared at Sebastian in awe. "That's amazing," he murmured. A past conversation pushed at his memories and Ciel struggled to grasp the frayed memory. It happened last week, the same day as the concert, if Ciel remembered correctly. Something Claude said. Something about Sebastian. "Is that your gift?" he asked, suddenly recalling the conversation.

Sebastian blinked. "My what?"

"Your gift," Ciel repeated. "Claude said you had a gift but he wouldn't tell me what it was. He said that you would tell me eventually. I think it had something to do with your hearing. That's what we were talking about at the time."

"Ah, that's what he meant," Sebastian muttered to himself as he glanced over his shoulder at the door. "I'll tell you tomorrow when we have time," he said as the door opened.

Ciel grumbled under his breath as Pluto entered the room, several new people following him. He recognized Victoria in the small group and judging by the ways her eyes lit up when she saw him, she remembered him. She claimed the seat next to him while a man who looked remarkably like Claude sat on the other side of Sebastian.

"Glad to see that Sebastian finally brought you up here," she said and crossed her legs. "I heard you went to the opening of his most recent composition. How was it?"

Blue eyes flickered over Victoria, uncertain whether to view her as a friend or foe. "I really enjoyed it," Ciel said honestly. "I can't even begin to describe how the music made me feel. Sebastian is extremely talented."

Victoria's face softened slightly. "He is. I'm glad to hear that you've gotten him out of the damnable apartment of his." She clicked her tongue. "About time. We all tried, but the man is stubborn. Like an ass."

Ciel chuckled and glanced back at Sebastian. "Who is he talking to?" he asked, gesturing to the Claude look alike.

"Johan Agares," Victoria said. "He's a lawyer. And he's not related to Claude, before you ask."

"They look like it," Ciel muttered. "What about the gray-haired guy over there." The smile on the man's face gave him the creeps.

"Well, we don't really call him by his actual name," Victoria started. "Just like we don't call Pluto by his name either. Instead, we just call him Undertaker because he works in the morgue."

"That makes sense," Ciel said. Although that still didn't explain Pluto's name, but Ciel could only guess that he derived the name from his spacey behavior. "And the other two?"

"Bard and Finny," Victoria said, pointing to each of them. "They're both straight, but they're good friends. And Undertaker is asexual. But he's rather perverted. Ironic, isn't it."

Ciel's eyes darted to Johan, noting the close proximity to Sebastian and the way Pluto glared at him. "I'm guessing Johan isn't."

She smirked. "You would guess correct, considering he is Sebastian's ex." Her leer deepened as Ciel's eyes widened and his head whipped back around to stare at the two. "Of course, they broke up a few years back and Sebastian hasn't had a boyfriend since, but they're still close friends."

"How close?" Ciel asked, his voice pitching slightly.

Victoria hummed. "Close enough. But if you ask me, they could get back together again."

Ciel flinched. "Why did they break up then?"

"Johan is married to his work. Too many late nights spent at the office and not enough time with Sebastian made them end it," Victoria said. "Johan has gotten better balancing his work and personal life though, and I wouldn't be surprised if Johan wanted to give it another try."

Something uneasy churned in Ciel's stomach and he tried to ignore the clenching feeling in his chest. His looked over Sebastian and Johan again, and he had to admit that they looked good together. The bitter taste of jealousy filled Ciel's mouth and he tried to swallow, hoping to rid himself of the taste but his mouth remained dry.

Next to him, Victoria shrugged. "But I could be wrong. Johan may want to try again, but I don't know if Sebastian would take the chance. Johan did choose work over him and I know that hurt Sebastian pretty badly."

"Then he doesn't deserve Sebastian," Ciel snapped. He knew work was important, but to choose it over a person? Ciel would never do that to Sebastian. He flinched at the thought and averted his eyes from Victoria's smug features.

"Of course," Victoria drawled. "If Sebastian had a boyfriend already, Johan couldn't ask him out again." She gave Ciel a pointed look.

"I don't know what you're talking about," he stated.

Victoria grinned and patted his knee. "Keep telling yourself that, hun. Denial isn't just a river in Egypt." She winked at him and stood up. "Pluto, how about some drinks so we can get this little party started? The club opens in less than an hour."

Pluto tore his attention away from Sebastian and Johan. "What does everyone want to drink?"

They shouted out their orders and Pluto scurried off to collect them. Once gone, Sebastian turned to Ciel, his face apologetic. "I'm sorry for ignoring you when everyone came in. I forgot how long it's been since I saw everyone."

Ciel offered a small smile. "It's okay. Victoria pointed everyone out." His eyes flickered to Johan and then back to Sebastian. "You didn't get anything to drink."

"Sebastian's a lightweight," Johan said and he gave Ciel a stony, unimpressed look. "He gets tipsy off a few drinks, but clearly you didn't know that."

Fire licked across Ciel's face but he refused to back down. "No need to say it like that's a bad thing. At least Sebastian knows his limits."

Johan scowled. "I never said it was a bad thing. I'm just saying that as his friend, you don't know much about him."

"Johan," Sebastian snapped. "This isn't the courtroom. Keep your arguments to yourself."

Ciel held Johan's glare before the man turned away, drawing Bard into a conversation. He sighed softly; glad to have the attention off him. He could see how Johan was a lawyer and he held back a shudder.

"Sorry," Sebastian mumbled again and rubbed the bridge of his nose. "Pluto didn't tell me that Johan would come as well."

"It's fine," Ciel said gently.

Sebastian shook his head. "We're not going to stay that late. Once we have dinner, we can leave." He paused. "Unless you would rather stay longer?"

Ciel chanced a quick look at Johan and grunted. "I'll follow your lead. This party is for you anyway."

"That doesn't mean that I want to stay until two in the morning," Sebastian stated as Pluto set a water bottle in front of him and a long neck next to Ciel. He thanked him and gestured to Ciel. "I just realized that I never asked how old you are. You are legal to drink that, right?"

Ciel laughed and popped the top. "I'm legal. And I'm twenty-two, in case you wanted to know." He took a small sip. As much as he didn't want to admit it, Johan made a valid point earlier. Ciel didn't know much about Sebastian. They didn't exactly sit down and talk about themselves much.

They learned things as they went, but even then, it wasn't much. Most of their time spent together was around town, with Sebastian telling him this and that about the sights. It didn't leave them much time to tell their life stories. Furthermore, who said Sebastian even wanted to tell Ciel everything about himself?

Although that didn't mean Ciel wasn't curious. He wanted to know more about Sebastian but never thought to ask. A part of him thought that he didn't deserve the chance to know.

He looked over at Sebastian, noting the furrowed brows and he cradled the cold drink between his hands. "Something wrong?"

Sebastian nodded. "In a way," he admitted and his fingers drummed along the armrest. "But it's me, not you."

"You say that a lot," Ciel teased.

"Because it's true most of the time," Sebastian said with a laugh and perked up as the smell of food wafted through the room. "Something smells good. Pluto must've ordered something. He doesn't serve food at the club and his cooking skills are less than adequate."

Ciel chuckled and looked over at the food that a server brought in. "It looks good too," he said as Pluto picked up his drink and a fork, tapping it against the glass.

The room quieted down and in the silence, Ciel could just hear the faint thumping of music beyond the walls. "I propose a toast." He lifted up his drink. "To Sebastian, for delivering another successful composition last week and for finally leaving his apartment."

Everyone laughed and Victoria shouted out, "Hear, hear!"

"Here's to a job well done and may you have many more to come," Pluto continued and everyone murmured their agreement. "Here's to you Sebastian. Cheers!"

Glasses clinked against each other before everyone took a drink. Ciel set his drink back down, making sure to keep it away from Sebastian's bottle. He didn't want Sebastian drinking something he didn't want. Not with Johan around.

He searched the room, quickly locating Johan near the food and Ciel stiffened when cool eyes met his. He held the glare until Sebastian called his name and Ciel turned his attention back to Sebastian. But he could still feel Johan's piercing gaze on him as he talked and from over Sebastian's shoulder, Victoria winked at him.

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

A sleek blue car came to a stop in front of the apartment and Ciel grumbled as he climbed out of the car. Despite his protests that he could get them back just fine with a taxi, Johan still insisted on taking Sebastian home. He didn't know who he was more frustrated at, Pluto for giving Sebastian the hard drink, or Johan for being a stubborn bastard.

If he had known the night would've ended this way, he wouldn't have let Bard buy Sebastian a beer during dinner. And he would've kept a better eye on Pluto. But he didn't expect Pluto to slip Sebastian a hard mixed drink and not tell him about the liquor he added.

In the end, he decided that it was a tie and he hated them both.

He scowled as Johan helped Sebastian out of the vehicle. He didn't like the way his hands wandered over Sebastian's body. "Maybe you should take him inside now," Ciel said coolly.

Johan shot him a nasty glare but started to guide Sebastian to the steps. "Get the door."

Ciel bit his tongue as he stomped forward, annoyed with Johan's superiority complex. He unlocked the door and held it open; letting the two men pass through. "I can take it from here," he said, reaching for Sebastian.

"You're nowhere near strong enough," Johan said and turned to Sebastian. "Can you take your shoes off?"

"'m goin' to kill Pluto," Sebastian murmured and leaned heavily against Johan as he struggled to take his shoes off. "Bastard did this on purpose. 'e always knew how to mix drinks."

Johan chuckled. "At least you didn't drink too much. You're just a little tipsy." He nudged the discarded shoes to the side. "Come on, let's get you to bed."

Ciel trailed them, clearing his throat when Johan's hand started to dip lower than needed. Un-amused eyes glared at him but he didn't attempt anything else as they continued to Sebastian's room. Ciel stood in the doorway as Johan guided Sebastian to the bed and crossed his arms across his chest. "He's in bed. You can go now."

"Not until he's comfortable," Johan stated.

Ciel scoffed. "He's in bed, how much more comfortable can he get?"

"He needs to get out of these clothes for starters," Johan said and climbed onto the bed. He straddled Sebastian's hips and reached for the first button on Sebastian's shirt.

"I think for one night he can sleep in his clothes," Ciel said, starting forward. He knew what would happen once Johan disrobed Sebastian and he refused to let that happen. "Just let him sleep."

A low growl escaped Johan's throat but he pointedly stayed where he was. "I'm not leaving until he's out of these clothes. It's nothing I haven't seen before," he said haughtily. "And between the two of us, I'm certain Sebastian would rather have me change him than you. I have experience in that after all."

"You had experience in that," Ciel corrected. "And you gave it up. Therefore, you have no right to speak for Sebastian and believe what you want. Who is to say that he even wants you touching him that way right now?"

"Ciel," Sebastian murmured, silencing them both. He turned to look at Ciel, crimson eyes shining with an awareness that surprised Ciel. "It's fine. You should get to bed, it's late."

Johan gave him a smug look. "You heard him," he said. "And shut the door on your way out."

Ciel nodded weakly, knowing a dismissal when he heard one. It hurt more than he thought and he backed out of the room without looking at the two bodies on the bed. He shut the door behind him, trying to hold a brave face even though his heart clenched and ached in his chest.

He hurried away from the room and made his way upstairs to the loft. The darkness surrounded him, offering its stuffy embrace but providing little comfort. The touch remained empty and lacking, and Ciel changed with lethargic movements. His whole body felt heavy and despite his better judgment, his ears strained to hear any sound in the silence.

He knew what would happen tonight behind Sebastian's closed door but he couldn't do anything about it. Sebastian was the one who told him to leave, crimson eyes clear and focused. It wasn't the alcohol speaking that time. Sebastian knew what he wanted and knew what would happen after Ciel left.

Ciel bit his lip in an attempt to fight back the emotions. It wasn't fair. He didn't want the two together. Johan didn't deserve Sebastian after leaving him so cruelly. He didn't deserve that second chance. But clearly Sebastian didn't see it that way as he just gave it to him.

The silence in the apartment stretched on and Ciel rubbed at his eyes. He let out a shaky sigh and crawled into bed, doing his best not to think about how lonely the loft felt. He rolled onto his back and looked up at the ceiling. If Johan weren't here, would things have worked out differently? Or would Sebastian still have turned him away?

No answer came forth and Ciel buried his way under the blankets, pulling them over his head. He didn't want to hear anything tonight, not when it would remind him of what he just lost. Not that he ever had Sebastian to begin with, but now he never would. And the thought made the pain in his chest double with each beat of his heart.


	8. Opus 8

**A/N**: Onto the next chapter! I hope y'all enjoy it ^^ Many, many thanks to **socialbutrfly1379 **for being my amazing beta again! She was awesome working on this story :3

**Warnings**: Language

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Kuroshitsuji

* * *

Ciel woke up late the next morning to the cries of a very hungry cat. Soot mewled insistently next to his ear and when Ciel refused to budge, she took to butting her head against his. A harsh sneeze tore from his mouth and for a moment, Soot bolted away. She came back a second later and Ciel gave in.

"Looks like you weren't the only one kicked out last night," he muttered to her and watched her with a single eye. He refused to lift his head from the pillow, content to ignore the real world for the time being.

Soot stared at him, tail twitching on the ground before she pawed at his arm. Ciel sighed and reached forward, indulging her. His fingers scratched under her chin, making Soot purr and inch closer. They both froze when Ciel's stomach growled and Soot gave him a pointed look. As well as a cat could at least.

Ciel groaned and slowly sat up. He pushed Soot away before she could climb into his lap and glanced over his shoulder to look out of the loft. Dark clouds obscured the sun that normally woke up Ciel. "Think those two are still asleep as well?" he asked and strained his ears for any sound. The apartment remained silent. "Guess that's a yes."

He stood up and ran a hand through his hair. There was no sense in stalling. Eventually he would need to go downstairs and eat. Might as well do it now before the unpleasant feelings could rise even more.

Soot trotted at his heels as he walked down the hallway and to the kitchen. He avoided looking further past the kitchen, knowing that he couldn't stomach seeing Sebastian's room right now. He didn't know what time he finally fell asleep the other night, but his sleep remained restless and he tossed and turned for several hours.

His thoughts filled with the happenings in Sebastian's room and his dreams betrayed him, putting him in Johan's spot. It probably wasn't healthy for him but Ciel remained powerless to his subconscious.

Ciel plugged the water heater in and then reached for a large mug. He could use some tea now. It would help soothe his nerves and give him something to do while he waited for everyone to wake up.

He nearly dropped the mug when a loud snore sounded from the other side of the kitchen and Ciel wheeled around. His eyes darted to Soot, who watched him and patiently waited for breakfast, and then back to the living room. "You surely didn't make that noise," he mumbled and Soot voiced her agreement.

He set the mug on the counter and silently moved forward. With soft feet, Ciel circled the barstools and approached the larger couch. The blanket that usually draped over the edge of the couch had vanished from last night and Ciel cautiously looked over the piece of furniture.

Another snore left the person sleeping on the couch, their face pressed against the pillow and a thin trickle of drool stained the fabric. Messy black hair splayed over the pillow and one arm hung over the edge of the couch but the blanket covered the rest of the body. Ciel sincerely hoped he had clothes on under the blanket.

Ciel smirked and he rounded the couch, squatting down in front of the sleeping male. "Did Sebastian kick you out last, Johan?" he teased. Johan made a noncommittal noise and Ciel covered his mouth to keep from laughing.

He stood back up and looked over his shoulder at Sebastian's door. He didn't know how Johan ended up on the couch last night but he could only hope that Sebastian had kicked him out. If so, then nothing would've happened between them. The uneasiness in Ciel's chest lifted at the thought and he struggled to keep a tight grip on it. He couldn't let his hopes get up just yet.

With a quiet hum, Ciel wandered over to Sebastian's room and pressed his ear against the door. "Sebastian?" he called, trying to judge if he was up or not. Silence met him and Ciel grumbled under his breath.

Something hard but furry bumped against Ciel's leg and he looked down. Wise but mischievous eyes looked back at him and Ciel knelt down to pick up Soot. Her body practically vibrated in his hands as she purred and Ciel rubbed her ears.

"Want to wake up Sebastian for me?"

At Sebastian's name, Soot cried loudly. Ciel chuckled and took that as a yes. He set her on the ground and tested the doorknob. It turned easily under his hand and Ciel cracked it open a smidge. Seeing the small opening, Soot darted forward and slipped inside without a look back at Ciel.

"You're welcome," Ciel muttered and moved away from the door. He walked back to the kitchen and checked the water before filling his mug with hot water.

The steam curled around his face and Ciel dipped the tea bag into the water, letting the aroma flood his senses. It perked him up and Ciel dug around the pantry for some sugar. He debated starting breakfast but decided it would be rude of him to start cooking in Sebastian's kitchen without permission. Making tea or coffee was one thing, but making anything else made Ciel feel as though he was overstepping his bounds as a guest.

He looked up as Soot's crying voice reached his ears and Ciel curled his hands around his mug as Sebastian stepped into the kitchen. His eyes darted over Sebastian's figure, looking for any signs of limping or blemishes that weren't there the previous night. Upon finding none, Ciel smirked behind his mug and took a sip.

The hot liquid burned his throat and an unpleasant thought came to mind. What if Sebastian topped last night? That would explain the lack of a limp.

"You're up early," Sebastian said, scattering his thoughts. "Usually I'm up before you." He set Soot down and reached into the pantry for her food.

Ciel swallowed and shuffled his feet. "You do mean me, right?" he questioned. He had an uneasy feeling that Sebastian thought he was Johan.

Sebastian cocked his head and his eyebrows furrowed. "Who else would I mean?" he asked and toed Soot. She growled playfully at him and nipped his ankle, demanding food. "This little creature is almost always up before me. My personal alarm clock if you will. And it varies with Mey-rin."

"I thought maybe you thought you were talking to Johan," Ciel said quietly.

"Why would I?" Sebastian asked and dumped Soot's food into her bowl. "I told him to leave last night."

Ciel sputtered. "You what?"

An amused smile crept across Sebastian's lips. "I told him to leave. I might be a lightweight when it comes to drinking, but I'm not that bad. Those two drinks aren't enough to get me so trashed that I don't know what's going on." He shrugged. "Since I can't see, the alcohol makes it a little harder for me to walk if I have more than a few drinks so it just makes it look worse than it really is."

"But I was in my right mind last night and I understood everything going on around me," he continued and his eyes danced. "I knew what Johan wanted. He didn't try for subtly after a while. But there's a reason we broke up and hadn't gotten back together. I reminded him of that last night and then told him to leave."

Ciel's hands trembled slightly and he set his mug down. "So last night, you two didn't…" he trailed off, red blooming across his face.

Sebastian shook his head. "No. I didn't want to make things more awkward for you by chewing him out in front of you, so I asked you to leave. It was the only way to get you two to stop arguing." He shuffled over to the refrigerator and searched for something to drink. "But thank you for worrying and trying to stop him."

Ciel didn't bother trying to argue that he wasn't worried. Sebastian already told him he could hear the changes in his voice and Ciel wasn't about to deny that he felt that way. His eyes flickered to the living room and then back to Sebastian.

"I, um…," he struggled for the words. "I don't know how to tell you this but uh, Johan didn't go home last night."

Sebastian's head snapped in his direction, anger clouding crimson eyes. "He what?" he hissed.

"He's still here," Ciel said. "Asleep on the couch."

For several long seconds, Sebastian didn't say anything and Ciel resisted the urge to shuffle his feet. He could see the contemplation on Sebastian's face as he weighed the options in his mind and Ciel almost felt bad for mentioning it in the first place. But if he hadn't, Sebastian would've found out a different way and Ciel had a feeling that would've turned out worse.

"Ciel, would you mind going back up to the loft for a bit?" Sebastian asked calmly, but Ciel could hear the faintest of trembles in his voice.

He remained root to his spot, unable to look away from Sebastian. He had never seen Sebastian truly angry before and it made him feel a new level of respect for him. He always thought of Sebastian as a calm, subdued person, one who wouldn't raise his voice or hand to another person. But seeing the feral look in his eyes made Ciel think otherwise.

"I, I'll still hear everything you say," he stammered.

Sebastian shook his head. "I know. I have my reasons though." He ran a hand through his hair. "As frustrated as I am with Johan, he's still my friend and I don't want to humiliate him by having you watch us argue. If you're upstairs, he'll think you're asleep and it'll save some of his pride."

Ciel nodded. "That's honorable of you," he said and grabbed his mug. "I'll be upstairs then."

He slipped past Sebastian and quickly stole up the steps. He felt bad for Johan, even if he deserved it after how he acted the night before and for ignoring what Sebastian said. Still, Ciel had a feeling that Sebastian's anger was something that he never wanted to face.

Once in the loft, he set his mug down on an end table and grabbed one of the blankets from his bed. He wanted to peek over the edge and have front row tickets to the show, but he quelled the urge. He wouldn't want anyone watching him during an argument with an ex, and Ciel respected Sebastian's wishes. Instead, he started to pace the loft, circling around his bed.

He jumped when something heavy hit the floor and Ciel moved to the other side of the loft to keep from looking over the edge.

"Fuck," Johan swore and Ciel could imagine him rubbing his head or shoulder. Whichever body part hit the hardest. "What the hell was that for, Sebastian?"

"Get out," Sebastian said coldly. "I told you last night to leave and you clearly didn't. I'm only going to tell you one more time. I don't want you here Johan. I know what you want but it's not going to happen. You left me, remember?"

Silence and then. "I know. I made a mistake, I know that now." He winced in Ciel's mind. "But you can't blame me for trying and hoping for another chance at a relationship with you, Sebastian."

Fabric shifted and Ciel hoped that Johan wasn't begging on his knees. "Your actions last night suggested that you wanted something other than a relationship, Johan," Sebastian stated and Ciel corrected the mental image to Sebastian with his arms crossed over his chest. "Furthermore, how you acted last night to my guest was deplorable at best."

"He deserved it," Johan spat. "Smug little brat, thinking he's better than everyone and that he knows everything about you. You don't see how he looks at you with longing eyes. He wants the same thing I do even though he knows nothing about you."

"Ciel might not know as much as you but that still doesn't give you any right to act that way towards him," Sebastian said callously.

Johan snorted and his face looked ugly to Ciel. "Why do you defend him so much? You just admitted that you two barely know anything about each other aside from the basics." His lips turned into a scowl. "You're already dating him, aren't you? Or you want to. Is that why you defend him so much?"

Sebastian shifted and a scuffle sounded below. Ciel hesitated for a moment before creeping over to the edge, worried that Johan had done something to Sebastian. He peered over the edge and his eyes widened, the actual scene proving much different from the one in his mind.

Fingers laced through black locks, gripping them tightly and Johan hissed as Sebastian forced him to the ground in front of him. "That's none of your concern, Johan. You lost the right to know about those things happening in my life when you left." He pushed him backwards, sending Johan sprawling on the living room floor. "Now, I'm telling you again, leave," he said, his voice hard as steel.

Ciel ducked behind the wall and almost shouted in surprise when Soot bolted into the loft. Her tail quivered and Ciel shuffled forward onto the bed to calm her down. She found her way under the covers and Ciel joined her, playing the part of sleeping guest in case Johan made his way into the loft.

Downstairs, fabric shuffled around and Ciel smothered his sneeze into the pillow. He had to hand it to Sebastian for keeping the volume of the argument rather quiet. Ciel expected loud voices and harsh words, but they kept it civil for the most part and at a normal level. It varied greatly compared to the fights he heard on campus and Ciel wondered if it had to do with Sebastian's disposition.

Rather than raise his voice, Sebastian used his tone to convey how he felt. The cold and hard voice drove the point home more than a screaming one.

Soot pressed closer to him and Ciel held still, trying to hear the happenings downstairs. The words had turned muffled and he knew Johan hadn't left yet. For a moment, he debated calling Claude but that would only turn things even more sour between Sebastian and Johan. Their friendship already felt strained and Ciel tried his best not to blame himself.

He jumped as the door opened downstairs and Ciel tensed, waiting for the loud slam that would follow. It never came and instead, it closed with a soft click that Ciel almost missed if he hadn't been waiting for a sound. He didn't dare move though, his mind racing with different scenarios. What if Johan hadn't left?

His body tensed as footsteps sounded on the stairs and Soot hissed at him when he grabbed her. Perhaps he could use the cat as a weapon if Johan tried anything.

Something nudged the bed before a soft chuckle reached Ciel's ears. "Are you hiding under the covers like a scared child?"

Ciel released a sigh and sat up to look at Sebastian. "Not at all," he quipped. "I thought I should pretend to be asleep in case Johan came up here."

The smile on Sebastian's face told Ciel that Sebastian didn't believe him. "Well, you can stop pretending. He left, for real this time." He leaned down to pick up Soot as she wound around his ankles. "Shall we have some breakfast then?"

"Sounds good. I'm starving," Ciel said and scrambled out of the bed. He followed Sebastian downstairs and back into the kitchen, scowling at his now cold cup of tea. He stuck the mug in the microwave and punched in a few numbers. "You know, I expected broken pottery, shouting, and slammed doors," Ciel admitted as he watched Sebastian move around the kitchen.

Sebastian laughed. "I think you've seen too many TV shows, Ciel," he said. "Johan and I are both adults and know how to act as such. Not all verbal arguments turn into violence."

Ciel grunted. "Some can," he stated.

"True," Sebastian admitted. "But I believe that Johan wouldn't want to lower himself to that level of immaturity. He considers himself very sophisticated. I'm sorry to disappoint you though," he teased.

Ciel hesitated and nibbled his lip as the microwave hummed behind him. "But everything turned out all right?" he asked carefully. Even though he didn't like Johan, he didn't want his friendship with Sebastian to deteriorate because of their disagreement.

Sebastian nodded. "It's fine, Ciel. We've had our fair share of arguments in the past and I'm sure this won't be the last of them. Someone's feelings will always end up hurt in a one sided relation. Last time mine were the ones on the front line. This time, they were Johan's." He glanced at his hands. "Still, it wasn't easy breaking his heart, if you will."

"Why don't you get back together with him then?" Ciel questioned.

Sebastian gave a wistful sigh. "Because Johan's first love will always be his job. He's a brilliant man and I would be remiss to come between that. It's better for him to find someone else who can respect that." He chuckled. "Plus, and it might sound selfish, but I want someone who doesn't mind taking time off to do things together. With Johan, it was like pulling teeth to get him to take even a single day off."

Ciel nodded and carried his drink over to the table. He understood Sebastian's point and his spirits lifted knowing that Sebastian wouldn't give Johan another chance. His mind ran over the conversation he heard earlier and it clung to a single point with a fierce grip.

_You're already dating him, aren't you? Or you want to. Is that why you defend him so much?_

The words peppered his thoughts and Ciel turned around to look at Sebastian. Sebastian hadn't bothered to defend the question and never gave an answer. Hope swelled in Ciel's chest and he swallowed harshly to keep it at bay in case he wasn't right. But did the lack of an answer mean that Johan made a valid point with his question?

Ciel's heart raced at the thought before he found himself running into a brick wall, the same wall that kept him separate from Sebastian. It still loomed before him, towering and shadowing him with its foreboding silence. The question sloppily painted across an uneven surface.

Could he see himself going out with Sebastian despite his blindness?

It left him fumbling around in the dark, the debate vicious in his mind, and Ciel grew tired of it. Because honestly, what did it matter if Sebastian was blind? It didn't take away from his personality or his looks - both of which were greatly attractive - and didn't mean Sebastian was inept. So why did it bother Ciel so much before?

_Because you're human_, a soft voice said that sounded strangely like Sebastian. _It's not in our nature to accept strange or different things right away. Things like that take time._

"Hey, Sebastian," Ciel said after a small debate. He didn't know if now was the best time to ask, but he wasn't going to wait any longer. He couldn't deny that he liked Sebastian as a friend and the idea of being something more than that made his heart pound against his ribs. It left his palms sweaty and his stomach flutter. "What are we doing today?"

Sebastian cocked his head in thought. "I hadn't really planned that far, to tell the truth. Did you have something in mind?"

Ciel shifted. "Kind of," he admitted and he wiped his hands on his pants. "I thought we could spend the day together."

"We've been spending our days together," Sebastian teased.

"I know that," Ciel said quickly. "I meant spend the day together and get to know each other a bit better. Like, like a date," he finished quietly and his face burned.

Sebastian turned away from the grill, surprise etched across his features. "A date?" he repeated.

Ciel brought his hands up. "You don't have to of course. But it's just that I don't know anything about you and I, I…" His heartbeat pounded in his ears. "I really like you."

He looked down at his feet, finding them fascinating as they wiggled in his socks against the tile. He didn't need a mirror to know his face burned bright red and Ciel gnawed at his lip in an attempt to quell his frayed nerves. They made him tremble in place and Ciel stiffened as Sebastian walked over to him.

His eyes refused to look up, too scared to see the expression on Sebastian's face. Was it one of vexation or amusement? What if Ciel had read the situation wrong the whole time and Sebastian truly didn't feel that way about him? Ciel tensed as Sebastian stopped in front of him and tried to quiet his heart. He swore Sebastian could hear it with how loud it beat within his breast.

"Ciel," he murmured. "Look at me."

Unbidden, Ciel's eyes rose and if possible, his heart raced faster. Sebastian stood just in front of him, close and almost trapping him against the kitchen table. Ciel's fingers clenched around the edge of the table and he swallowed as crimson eyes stared directly at him. Seeing, yet not.

"What brought this up?" Sebastian asked softly.

"A lot of things," Ciel said with a low laugh and he ran a hand over his face. "Jealousy, for starters."

Sebastian cocked his head. "Jealousy? Over what? Johan?"

Ciel nodded. "It's complicated."

"Try me."

"Johan wasn't lying earlier, when he said that I wanted the same thing as him. I just didn't realize it myself until recently." Ciel looked away. "I always thought you were good-looking and the longer I stayed with you, the more I found that your personality mirrored your looks. You're famous in your own rights, but you're still modest about it.

"But I had trouble admitting to myself how I felt when it came to you," he continued. "I think I started to come to terms with it on Wednesday, but it came to a head last night when I saw you with Johan. The thought of you getting back together with him made me sick and hurt more than I thought it could. I didn't think he deserved you and I couldn't stop thinking that I would be better."

He looked up at Sebastian through his eyelashes. Sebastian hadn't moved or said anything while he talked and Ciel fought the urge to bite his lip again. It had started to become a nervous habit and he needed to stop.

Finally, Sebastian shifted and Ciel tracked the movement with his eyes. "For the longest time," Sebastian said. "I didn't know about you. Victoria told me that she suspected you were gay but I didn't believe her. You only confirmed her suspicions last Wednesday."

Ciel grunted. "I had a feeling that she knew the whole time. She gave me that look whenever we met." And was the one to point out Ciel's attraction to Sebastian, but Ciel wouldn't tell him that.

Sebastian nodded. "Even after that though, I didn't think you felt anything towards me other than friendship. You would lock up whenever I came too close and your voice grew tense." He shrugged. "Plus, I figured that since you hadn't said anything after finding out my preference, you weren't interested."

"Mixed signals, huh," Ciel muttered.

Low laughter left Sebastian's mouth. "Very mixed," he said and cautiously reached forward. His fingers brushed against Ciel's check. "I can't see, so I have to rely on my hearing to judge your reactions and make a guess from there. I can't see the way you look at me as Johan claimed."

Ciel's hand rose and he grabbed Sebastian's hand, laying a light kiss on the knuckles. "I didn't even know it at first." He paused and squeezed his eyes shut. "When I first realized it, I had a little trouble accepting it. I didn't know what to think."

An understanding noise escaped Sebastian. "Because I'm blind."

"It's not so much that," Ciel said quickly. "Well, a little I guess. But I just had a hard time accepting it at first. It's as you said. It wasn't so much you as it was me. Not that it makes it right though."

Sebastian hummed. "Depends on who you ask," he stated. "It's frustrating for me to know that my blindness kept you from acting on your feelings. To me, it's not a big problem and I don't understand why it's so hard for you to understand that. Yet, I know that this is something new for you and you have every right to act the way you do. Still, I can't help but feel that way and I imagine that you felt the same way in your situation."

Ciel gave a weak laugh. "Does this mean we're hopeless?" he asked, feeling his chest clench.

Sebastian shook his head. "I don't think so," he said. "It just means that we still have room to grow before we can overcome the small bump in front of us. One that we can try to cross together."

"Does that mean you'll go on a date with me?" Ciel questioned, holding his hope tightly in his hands before it could get away from him.

"A date with you sounds wonderful," Sebastian answered with a smile.

Ciel let out a shaky breath and ran a hand through his hair. "Ha, really?" His heart jackhammered against his chest and he couldn't help but laugh. He felt ridiculous but at the same time, the elation overrode anything else. "I don't think I've ever been this nervous asking someone out before," he admitted.

Sebastian chuckled and winked. "I'll take that as a compliment," he teased.

"It is," Ciel said and scratched the back of his neck as he landed in reality once more. "So, um, what do you want to do?

"First, we're going to eat breakfast. Or brunch, in this case," Sebastian stated. "We can talk about plans while we eat."

Ciel peered over Sebastian's shoulder to look at the grill. "That sounds good. Provided everything isn't burnt by now."

Sebastian squeezed his hand before letting it go. "I turned it off before I came over."

"Smart," Ciel said as he sank into the nearest chair. His heart had yet to calm down and he held up his hand, watching as a fine tremble shook the tips of his fingers. But none of that mattered because Sebastian had said yes.

All the past worries and pestering feelings of annoyance slipped from his shoulders. They left him feeling energized and alive, able to breathe once more. No more did the weight of uncertainty press against his chest and leave him awake at night. An easy grin formed on his lips and Ciel ran a hand through his hair.

He looked up as Sebastian carried the plates over to the table, setting them on the surface. As always, it amazed him to see the culinary creations Sebastian could create. He speared a few pieces of sausage and two pancakes. "So," Ciel started carefully as he reached for the butter.

"Impatient," Sebastian laughed but looked at him expectantly. "What were you thinking of doing?"

Ciel played with a napkin. "I figured we could go out and find a nice outdoor café where we can talk." He jumped as a loud clap of thunder rumbled overhead. "Or not."

Sebastian turned to look out the window and blinked when a bolt of lightning flickered through the skies. "Summer storms come and go quickly," he said. "We can stay inside and talk until it passes. Then we can head out to a café afterwards. It works out rather well this way, actually. It gives us time to digest brunch."

"Sounds good to me," Ciel said and sipped at his tea. His leg bounced with nervous energy as they continued to eat and the butterflies in his stomach made it hard to swallow. He didn't know if it was from excited nerves or just nervousness in general. Another crack of thunder almost had him flying from his seat and Ciel mentally chastised himself.

"I like thunderstorms," Sebastian said suddenly and Ciel stared blankly at him. "They're thrilling but they have a soothing tone to them too."

Ciel blinked. "Okay, I think?"

Sebastian laughed. "You wanted to talk and get to know each other," he stated. "Plus, I can hear the chair shifting against the floor, so I'd have to guess that you're nervous."

"A bit," Ciel admitted and tried to still his fidgety leg.

"You shouldn't be," Sebastian said gently. His tone wasn't reprimanding but one of reassurance. "I'm still the same as before. Nothing has changed."

Ciel let out a long breath. "Yeah," he said and shook his head to clear his racing thoughts. Sebastian made a point. Nothing had changed between them just because they expressed interest in each other. "You like thunderstorms," he prompted.

Sebastian nodded. "I do. I think thunderstorms are Mother Nature's way of playing instruments. Each storm has a different composition, each clap of thunder has a varied pitch, and the rain adds a unique background sound." He smiled. "You could say thunderstorms were my first muse when I was a child."

"I never thought of storms that way," Ciel admitted. "And you know, you're supposed to be scared of storms as a child," he teased.

"Perhaps when I was younger they scared me at first, but I quickly found them enjoyable," Sebastian said and he traced a random pattern on the table. "I could understand them when no one else could. They speak, but not in words and I could hear them. It was when I first discovered my gift, as Claude so calls it."

Ciel perked up and he leaned forward. He had forgotten that Sebastian was supposed to tell him about his gift today.

A long but low rumble of thunder rolled overhead and it seemed to drag on for minutes. Sebastian looked up at the ceiling and his lips quirked. "Reverberation," he said and lowered his eyes to Ciel. "I can't see music, but I hear it all around me. I can hear the different notes, pitches, and rhythms in almost everything. The beat of the rain comes in a range of time signatures and the thunder pitches and rolls, providing a variety of notes in a single action."

"I hear the notes everything makes and transcribe them onto the paper so other people can hear it," he continued. "Almost everything around me speaks but it speaks in a language others don't understand. But I can hear and understand what they say when their voices sing to me. I take that and translate their words into a language that people can read."

Ciel stared at Sebastian as lightning filled the room, followed quickly by thunder. His heart leapt to his throat at the sound and his ears strained to hear the same thing Sebastian could. The thunder rumbled away, deep and lingering, but no words came to Ciel. All he could hear was the last remaining vibrations in the air as the thunder ebbed away.

The rain came down harder, the drops bouncing and beating against the railing of the patio while the majority pattered against the concrete. The sound remained constant but Ciel couldn't pick out the time signature as Sebastian claimed. All the elements danced there in front of him, but Ciel could only see and hear it. But he couldn't understand it.

Not the way Sebastian could.

"I can't," Ciel started and shook his head. "How did you realize you could do this?"

"When I was younger, I had a specialist who worked with me. She helped me learn how to become independent and encouraged me to broaden my horizons. She was the first person who introduced me to the piano," Sebastian said. "No one in my family can play an instrument but my mother encouraged me. I learned how to play for several years but it wasn't until I was ten or so that I discovered my gift."

They both jumped as a loud burst of thunder shook the windows in the apartment and Soot came streaking into the kitchen. Her tail puffed out and quivered violently as she protested the storm next to Sebastian's feet. He chuckled and scooped her up, rubbing her ears. She scrambled up onto his shoulders and Sebastian sighed before standing up to collect the plates.

Ciel shook his head in amusement but helped Sebastian clear the table. He watched, amazed that Soot could stay so perfectly balanced on Sebastian's shoulders as they cleaned up from breakfast. He figured this was a regular occurrence between the two.

After cleaning everything and grabbing another cup of tea, Ciel followed Sebastian into the living room. The rain continued to fall, trailing down the windows and forming vertical rivers on the panes. The water slipped and curled in obscure patterns, illuminating whenever lightning forked from the darkened clouds.

He took a seat and grabbed a nearby blanket, curling into it as Sebastian settled next to him. Impatiently, he waited for Sebastian to get comfortable so he could continue speaking.

"It happened during a storm, like this," Sebastian said after a few moments and his hand brushed over Soot's body. "I was at the piano, working through a piece when a thunderstorm started to roll in. I didn't think much of it at the time until the rain started to come down. It fell at a faster time signature than the piece I played and I reacted to it without thinking."

"The thunder followed the rain and that's when I truly started to divert from the piece. I moved to the left, playing the deeper notes and letting them linger, reverberating throughout the strings as though trying to mimic the thunder itself," Sebastian said. "I continued throughout the rest of the storm, keeping a beat that matched the rain until it passed. My mother always told me that she thought I wanted to capture the thunder and in a way, that's what I did."

Sebastian shook his head. "After that, I started hearing the sounds around me expressed in musical annotations. Someone laughing, a baby screaming, my mother preparing dinner; everything had a sound. They all relayed back to me in a musical sense and I found that I could write them down in a way that everyone could understand." Soot butted her head underneath his chin and Sebastian soothed her. "The next time a thunderstorm came, I tried to recreate it with notes. It took a while, but after I tweaked it and worked on it, I played it for my parents. I made my mother cry."

Ciel could only imagine what it had been like that day. To hear your child compose a musical piece meant to impersonate the raw power of a thunderstorm when they couldn't even see what it looked like. It gave Ciel the chills just thinking about it and he wondered if Sebastian could see through his music.

"I'm sure they were very proud," Ciel said. "It's amazing. You did something no one else really has before. You captured a thunderstorm and made it accessible to everyone."

"I like to think my mother was proud, once she stopped bawling," Sebastian said with a light laugh. "She couldn't stop hugging me after that and I felt like a teddy bear."

Ciel snickered at the image in his mind. Sebastian had a very disgruntled look on his face and it made Ciel laugh even more. "Do you still have the compositions from when you started writing them?"

Sebastian nodded. "I have them. When I first started, I composed strictly for the piano until I had a better grasp. After that I branched out and experimented with different instruments, learning the sounds each one made." He gestured in the direction of his room. "I have my original ones on my computer. I haven't published those and keep them for myself."

"As a reminder?"

"Of sorts," Sebastian answered. "There are some compositions that I don't publish because of their meaning to me. The ones I first composed were for my parents and a few were for Claude. Those remained personal and I felt that sharing them would make them lose that feeling."

Ciel nodded. "I understand that," he said and looked out the window. The rain had begun to lighten but thunder still rumbled in the distance. The sounds came softer and Ciel could understand how Sebastian found storms as both thrilling and soothing. "You have an amazing gift. I can see why Claude calls it that."

Sebastian hummed and leaned his head back on the couch. "Thank you," he said and stroked his fingers along Soot's back. She shifted slightly but continued to sleep. "When I hear all the sounds and read them - when I compose - it's the closest I can get to seeing, I think."

Ciel nibbled his lip, debating asking the question that rested on the tip of his tongue. "Can I ask," he started and he had a feeling that Sebastian already knew what he wanted to ask. "What's it like for you? Not being able to see."

"It's hard to explain," Sebastian murmured. "To me, the darkness is normal. It changes throughout the day of course, but otherwise, I find it normal. I think most people pity me because I can't see everything around me. And that I'll never know what things look like. But they never stop to think that I might pity them."

"How so?" Ciel asked.

Lips quirked. "You can see everything around you and you know what it looks like. For the most part, I don't. I have tactile aids, but for the rest of it, I have to use my imagination," Sebastian said. "And you already know part of how that works for me."

Ciel laughed, easily remembering Sebastian's description of Will.

"But because I can't see, I don't have to conform to what everyone else sees," Sebastian said. "If I'm having a bad day or I'm somewhere I don't want to be – say a meeting and I'm bored – my world and what I see in my mind can easily change. In my mind, what I see isn't a meeting room desk as everyone else sees, but rather something more interesting."

Ciel drained the last of his tea. "You must have an extremely vivid imagination."

"I've felt a lot of things in my life to build it up that way," Sebastian said with a smile. "Claude said it's something akin to daydreaming. But since I'm blind, I have an advantage that most people don't have. In that, I can see my daydream with my eyes open. He called it the perfect meeting room guise."

"Claude said you were born blind?" Ciel asked cautiously.

Sebastian shook his head. "He was being nice." His eyes closed. "I could see when I was born, not that I remember of course. But I wasn't truly born blind. That's his go to answer when he doesn't want to tell someone my story. He's always been a firm believer that everyone should tell their own story when they want to tell it."

Ciel grunted. "He just keeps surprising me with his morals." He peered at Sebastian. "What happened?"

"When you're born, the nurse puts eye drops in your eyes as a precaution against bacteria," Sebastian said. "The nurse who tended to me used drops that were too strong and thus damaged my eyes." He looked as though he wanted to say something else but held back at the last second and kept silent.

Ciel shifted. He didn't want to say sorry. He was sorry that it happened to Sebastian but he wasn't the one who caused his blindness, nor could he have prevented it. Saying sorry wouldn't do anything for Sebastian. Instead, he leaned forward and carefully cupped Sebastian's cheeks.

"For what it's worth," he said. "I think your eyes are stunning." His fingers stroked the soft skin under Sebastian's eyes. "I know it doesn't fix what the nurse did or help anything, but I still think they're wonderful."

Sebastian hummed and leaned into the touch. "That's comforting to know," he said. His hands covered Ciel's and slowly followed his arms back to Ciel's body so he could return the gesture. "I believe you already know what I think about you."

Ciel grinned. "I do," he stated and groaned lowly when Sebastian's fingers rubbed against the base of his neck. "And if you ask me, I think we make a great pair."

Laughter left Sebastian's mouth. "I'll take your word for it." He looked out the window. "I think the rain has stopped."

Blue eyes darted to the window, taking in the sunlight that streamed through the clouds. "Yeah," Ciel said and backed away from Sebastian. "Do you still want to go to the café?"

"I could go for a short walk," Sebastian said and stood up. "There's a quaint coffee shop around the corner. If they have any dry seats, we can sit outside. I like the smell of rain."

"I'm starting to think you just like anything to do with rain or thunderstorms," Ciel stated.

Sebastian pulled an innocent face but his eyes danced with mischief. "Go get changed," he said. "Otherwise I'll leave without you."

Ciel stuck out his tongue at Sebastian and then raced up the stairs, his steps light and his chest even lighter.


	9. Opus 9

**A/N**: Next chapter! Thank you everyone for your wonderful support ^^ It really means a lot :3 Many, many thanks to **socialbutrfly1379 **for being my amazing beta again! She was awesome working on this story :3

**Warnings**: Language

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Kuroshitsuji

* * *

Fingers skimmed quickly and lightly over the raised bumps on the page, a faint smile on Sebastian's face. Ciel watched him quietly from the kitchen and his toes wiggled in his socks against the tile floor. The socks muffled his footsteps, a trick Ciel had learned early in the game. A page turned, the edge of the paper dragging against Sebastian's shirt and creating a crackling noise in the silence of the apartment.

Ciel smirked and slowly started to walk forward. He walked lightly on the balls of his feet, almost on his toes. His arms held outward from his body, keeping the fabric from brushing against each other as he approached the back of the couch. His shorts, which he had discarded earlier in the game, still sat in a pile next to the couch.

Nothing would alert Sebastian to his approach and Ciel fought to keep his steps light. He wouldn't lose. He couldn't lose. If he won, Sebastian promised to play something for him on the piano before they went out for dinner. If he lost, well, Ciel didn't let himself dwell on that.

_You can do this, _he told himself_. You can sneak up on Sebastian. It's not impossible._

Another page turned and Ciel paused, waiting for Sebastian to lose himself in his book again. Almost there. Only a few more feet and he would win the game.

Three more small steps and Ciel opened his mouth just as Sebastian spun around to look at him. A smug smirk flickered across Sebastian's lips. "Found you," he teased.

Ciel scowled and almost stomped his foot. "Impossible. How did you hear me this time? I'm practically naked and I even covered my feet." He held up a foot for emphasis. "What gave me away?"

"You opened your mouth," Sebastian said. "When you did, you sucked in a deep breath to speak. That gave you away. Plus, you breathe loud to begin with."

"You and your superpower hearing," Ciel grumbled and circled around the couch. He dropped down on the cushions next to Sebastian.

Sebastian chuckled and closed the book. "You just couldn't be a ninja," he quipped.

Ciel poked Sebastian in the arm. "Hush you. You just have amazing hearing," he stated. "I guess you want your prize?"

"Preferably," Sebastian said with a smile. Ciel leaned in closer and Sebastian's arm curled his waist. "I'm starting to wonder if you're losing on purpose," he murmured.

"Well, you keep giving me a good reason to lose," he answered. "Although I do want to hear you play."

Sebastian's eyes lowered. "In good time," he stated before closing the small gap between them.

Ciel hummed appreciatively as their lips melded together and he pressed his body further against Sebastian. His hand came up and cupped the base of Sebastian's neck, deepening the kiss as their tongues curled around each other. For someone who couldn't see, Sebastian knew how to dominate a kiss and Ciel wondered what else he could take the lead on.

They broke apart and Ciel panted slightly. "You're really good at this," he said and licked his lips.

"Good at this game or good at kissing?" Sebastian questioned, his voice amused.

"Both," Ciel stated. His fingers tightened briefly in Sebastian's hair. Sebastian and Johan had dated for a few years; no doubt, Sebastian gained most of his skill from there. "You and Johan," he trailed off.

Sebastian made a soothing sound in the back of his throat. "We were intimate," he said and squeezed Ciel's waist in a reassuring gesture. "But I'm not going to compare you two."

The words eased Ciel's mind but didn't soothe the itch that had started to form. He flushed. "How did that work?"

"We switched," Sebastian said unabashed. "Just because I can't see doesn't mean that I'm going to roll over and play submissive to someone. I like to take control as much as the next guy. Everyone has the same structure to their bodies. It's easier than you think."

Ciel sputtered. "You, you," he floundered for the words. He had a hard time picturing it. Sebastian seemed so laid back at times and of course, he was blind. Then again, Sebastian seemed to make his own rules and Ciel had to admit, he didn't see it in Sebastian's personality to back down from what he wanted. "Wow."

Sebastian laughed and pressed their foreheads together. "You don't need to worry about that, Ciel," he said and placed a chaste kiss on his forehead.

A brief wave of hurt nipped at Ciel and his eyes lowered. "Okay," he said quietly and his hands came to rest in his lap. He supposed he should be happy that Sebastian cared for him and wanted to date him, but it still stung that he didn't want to be intimate with him. "I understand."

"Do you?" Sebastian questioned and tilted his head up. "We've just started dating, Ciel. I'm sorry, but you picked a rather difficult person in terms of relationships. I don't sleep with anyone after only a handful of dates. Eventually though..." He let the statement hang in the air as his hands settled on Ciel's hips, drawing soft circles on his skin.

Ciel shuddered at the suggestion. This was different compared to college, where most of the people he knew were willing to put out on the first night. He had his fair share of one-night stands and a few relationships along the way, but they never lasted long. He vaguely wondered if this was what it meant to mature.

Sebastian gave him an expectant look as the silence stretched on. Finally, he shifted and disappointment flickered quickly across his face. "I'm sorry, Ciel," he murmured. "I don't know what you expected in regards to that, but it's something that I don't make exceptions for."

The upset tone jerked Ciel from his thoughts and he hurriedly shook his head. "No!" he shouted and cleared his throat. "No, that's not what I was thinking."

He reached for Sebastian. "I respect your choice, I truly do. I just had an epiphany, that's all." Ciel brought Sebastian's hand up and nuzzled his palm before laying a soft kiss against the skin. "I feel like a child next to you sometimes. You already have a successful job and a firmer grasp on the world than I do. You know what you want and you won't let anyone deter you from that."

A low chuckle passed through Sebastian's lips. "I'm also a few years older than you, Ciel. Not that it's a deciding factor in some cases but there are times when one's age reflects on their actions." He cocked his head. "At the same time though, I've known people older than me who still acted as though they were back in college and vice versa. It all depends on the person, I think."

Ciel grunted. "Even that was a mature answer."

"I try," Sebastian joked. "But would a mature person bait you into playing a game like the one we played earlier?"

"Probably not," Ciel stated and his lips twitched.

Sebastian smirked. "There you go. I'm not as mature as you think." He reached for Ciel. "Especially since I devised that game the way I did because I happen to like kissing you."

Ciel clicked his tongue in amusement but didn't stop Sebastian from kissing him again. His toes curled in pleasure and he ran his tongue over straight teeth before forcing his way into Sebastian's mouth. Teeth clicked against each other as the kiss grew rough and Ciel briefly tasted copper on his tongue.

He sat up as Sebastian put a hand on his chest and gave a small push. Confusion washed over his face as Sebastian shuffled around on the couch until he could lie down, his legs parted for Ciel join him. Ciel didn't need any further encouragement and he carefully aligned their bodies, drawing Sebastian into another kiss.

Hands roamed across his body and Ciel shuddered against the added feeling. His breath hitched when Sebastian squeezed his ass and Sebastian smirked into the kiss. The hands vanished the next moment, trailing up Ciel's back and then skimming down his sides. They brushed against his ribs and ghosted over ticklish spots Ciel didn't even knew he had.

Ciel's hips bucked forward at a feather light touch over the small of his back and he moaned into Sebastian's mouth. "You drive me crazy," he muttered when they broke apart.

"I aim to please," Sebastian murmured and their lips met again.

Their tongues brushed against each other as they lazily kissed. Sebastian's hands finally stopped roaming and one settled at his nape while the other rested on his lower back. They both traced random patterns over his skin and Ciel sighed against Sebastian's lips, finding comfort in the feeling. It was easy to lose himself in Sebastian's embrace and touch.

Sebastian made him feel loved and welcomed. The warm touches spoke volumes and spoke for Sebastian without him ever opening his mouth. Ciel felt cherished, as cliché as it sounded. The emotions he felt swelled and overrode his feelings from past relationships, and Ciel never wanted to stop feeling this way.

He jumped and sucked in a deep breath as his cell phone started to ring a shrill tone in the kitchen. His heart pounded against his chest in surprise and Ciel could feel Sebastian's heart matching his own. He cursed under his breath and untangled himself from Sebastian's embrace.

He jogged to the kitchen, already missing the warmth that Sebastian's arms offered and Ciel grabbed for the phone. His eyes widened at the caller ID and for a moment, Ciel debated answering. The phone continued to vibrate in his hand and from the living room, Ciel could see Sebastian looking at him from over the couch, probably wondering why he hadn't answered it yet.

Ciel sighed and pressed the talk button, silencing the phone as he brought it up to his ear. "Hello?"

"Ciel!" a happy voice crowed from the other line and Ciel yanked his head away from the speaker. "You are talking to a free man and quite possibly, a genius."

"I am?" Ciel asked doubtfully. The word genius didn't pair well with Alois ever since he left for college.

"You are," Alois answered, tone smug. "Guess who finished his class today and passed the class."

Ciel grunted. "You."

"You are correct!" A pause. "At least, I'm certain I passed my class. I won't know until later next week, but I'm certain I got at least a 'C'. Plus, I met this hot chick in class who agreed to go out with us tonight when we celebrate."

Ciel pinched the bridge of his nose. "That's nice and all, Alois," he started. "But why are you telling me this?"

Alois laughed loudly. "And you say I'm the one with the bad memory, Ciel!" He continued to snicker. "Don't you remember? I finished my class, so you can come over now and we can start this vacation of ours. I even wrote it down on several sticky notes and posted them everywhere so I wouldn't forget." He sounded proud of himself.

The phone nearly dropped from Ciel's fingers as they grew numb at Alois's words. Cruel reality came crashing down around his ears and Ciel gripped the counter as he started to sway on his feet.

He had completely forgotten that he would stay with Alois after he finished his class. Some part of him expected Alois to forget entirely – he didn't have the best track record after all. But mainly, Ciel had let himself get caught up in the whirlwind that was Sebastian. Alois had completely slipped his mind after Sebastian burst into his life and started showing him around.

Now, Alois had come back, charging into the picture like a bull in a china shop. Dangerous and destroying everything in its path. He popped the bubble that Ciel had lived comfortably in the past few weeks and forced him back to reality. The reality that Ciel couldn't stay with Sebastian any longer.

The thought gripped Ciel's heart tightly and squeezed with a force that made him choke. His mind sputtered to a stop and refused to think, a single thought circling his head like a broken record player. _I have to leave Sebastian_.

"Ciel?" Alois called over the phone. "You still there?"

Ciel blinked several times and then swallowed to clear the thick feeling that threatened to suffocate him. "Ye-yeah," he said and ran a shaky hand through his hair. His whole world had turned upside down within the span of two minutes. He didn't know what to think and the words refused to come forward. "You were saying," he finally managed.

Alois made a pleased noise. "Yeah! So, I can come pick you up tonight, wherever you're staying at, and then we're going out to a party tonight. And maybe a club after that." He voice pitched with excitement. "The guys said they would treat me since I finally finished my class. Summer classes suck balls, you know that? Whoever thought of them clearly was a prude. I mean, summer is for partying, drinking, and sleeping in late. Not class."

"If it's a party for you, maybe I should sit it out," Ciel tried, his thoughts trickling slowly from his brain to his mouth. But his tongue felt heavy in mouth and the words tasted like ash.

"Nah, it's also for you. A welcome party of sorts, you know?" Alois stated. "This way we can start off our vacation right."

Ciel shook his head. "As nice as that sounds, I think I'll pass." He looked in Sebastian's direction and toed the ground. "This sounds more like it's for you than me and I'd hate to crash that."

It was a lie of course. Ciel could care less about crashing a party. In reality, it was more about spending a little extra time with Sebastian. That, and Ciel wanted to avoid a party with Alois's roommates at all costs. While he didn't mind a party or going to a club with friends, he didn't think he could stomach it with people he already didn't like.

"But Ciel," Alois whined. "It's going to be fun."

"It's not just that," Ciel started, his thoughts coming a little faster. "I can't just leave the place that I'm at in a few hours. I have to pack my bags and I don't think it's polite to leave my host with such little warning. He did a lot for me and I'd feel rude leaving this way."

Silence stretched over the phone and Ciel could only hope that Alois would accept his excuse. Most of what he said was true, it wasn't exactly feasible for him to leave tonight. Furthermore, it wasn't fair for Sebastian, and Ciel didn't want to run without any prior warning. Sebastian didn't deserve that.

Alois sighed, breaking the silence. "I guess I can understand that. Are you sure though?"

Ciel nodded. "I'm sure, Alois. You go and have your fun tonight and I'll see you tomorrow." He winced at the thought. "Don't worry about me. I'll be fine for one more night."

"Okay," Alois said, bouncing back far quicker than Ciel expected. "I'll probably swing by to pick you up tomorrow around two or so. I'll text you when I wake up and you can send me the directions."

Blue eyes rolled in exasperation. "Sounds good," he said. "Have fun."

"Will do!" Alois chirped and hung up, leaving Ciel standing alone in the kitchen.

He thumbed the screen, ending the call and locking the device. It clattered lightly against the counter where Ciel set it down but he didn't move right away. His eyes darted over the apartment, taking in the rich colors that covered the walls to the large open windows that let in the sunlight. It felt like Ciel had stayed here longer than a month.

And now he had to leave.

He had to leave the quaint Arts District and its fascinating personality. He would have to leave delicious home cooked meals and warm laughter, the soft jingle of Soot's bell, and a place that felt more like home than the apartment he lived in during college.

More than that, Ciel would have to leave Sebastian.

Ciel could stand to leave everything else, but his thoughts sputtered to a halt at the idea of leaving Sebastian so soon. He knew that eventually he would have to go back when the summer ended, but that was well over two months away.

"Ciel?"

Sebastian's voice washed over him, caressing like a soft breeze and it coaxed him back to the couch. Barely dressed, he could feel the air conditioner wafting against his skin and it sent chills racing throughout his body. Goosebumps erupted on his skin and Ciel pressed close to Sebastian once he sat down on the couch.

"Everything okay?" Sebastian asked.

Ciel grunted. "I'm sure you heard part of that conversation," he said.

"I heard snippets but I tried to give you your privacy." He gestured to the book in his lap. "But I think I caught enough," he finished softly.

"I have to leave tomorrow," Ciel said, deciding to bite the bullet. "That was Alois. My friend who left me at the airport earlier this month."

Sebastian snorted. "Some friend," he said and then winced. "Sorry, I shouldn't have said that."

Ciel shook his head. "No, I think it's called for in this situation. We used to be great friends before he left for college. Six years or so we had known each other but then he comes down here and he completely changed." He ran a frustrated hand through his hair, almost smacking Sebastian in the face with his agitated motions. "All he cares about now is going out drinking and partying with his roommates, and he's barely passing his classes. I never hear from him anymore and he's just…he's not the person I remember. He changed so quickly."

Soft fingers ran through his hair and Sebastian encouraged him to lay his head in his lap. Ciel shifted around on the couch and sank into the pillow Sebastian had placed in his lap and sighed as he continued to massage his scalp.

"I don't know him, so I can't say what's going on with him," Sebastian said. "But from an outsider's perspective, I would have to say that he has fallen victim to the college trap. He's away from home for the first time and with other people that he feels he needs to impress them. Social acceptance is a large factor for people and maybe he feels he needs to prove a point."

Ciel glared at the window. "But that doesn't give him any excuse to ignore years of friendship for people he barely knew when he entered college." Anger welled up inside his chest and several months of pent up frustration came tumbling forward. "He doesn't see anything wrong with how he's acting and he gets mad at me for saying anything about it, when I'm just worried that he's going to fuck up his life."

Sebastian hummed. "Maybe he's just going through a phase. It's something new and shiny to him, and he wants to explore it until he's tired of it. Once this phase runs its course, everything will go back to the way it once was."

"I doubt it," Ciel said bitterly. "It's been a year already. And phase or not, it doesn't give him any reason to act this way. I would never treat him that way," he spat.

"I never said he was right in the way he's acting or treating you," Sebastian cooed. "Simply that it's a phase. Everyone one goes through them and it affects everyone in different ways. You might not treat him that way, but he's different from you. That's just part of your personality and your loyalty, if you will, to your friends."

Ciel squeezed his eyes shut. "It hurts though, Sebastian."

Sebastian nodded but his fingers never stopped moving. "I know. It's never pleasant when a friend treats you that way. You feel hurt and betrayed, and it makes it harder to forgive them or listen to logic. Betrayals are the worst."

"You speak from experience?" Ciel asked and rolled onto his back.

"Somewhat. I had to deal with Johan leaving me for his work," Sebastian said. "It hurt and at the time, I felt betrayed. I thought he cared for me as much as I did him. Finding out that he didn't, hurt me deeply."

Ciel didn't speak for a while and he let out a shaky sigh. He trembled slightly, a mixture of frustration and anger that was a long time coming. It felt good to rant and get everything off his chest. It didn't erase the problems, but at least he could vocalize them compared to keeping them in and fuming silently.

He shifted and Ciel rolled over again, burying his face in Sebastian's shirt. "Do you think things will get better between us?" he whispered. The question plagued his mind whenever he slept or when the silence of his room grew too quiet. He didn't want to lose several years of friendship over this and Ciel clung to the hope that things would get better.

For a long time, Sebastian didn't answer and Ciel focused on Sebastian's heartbeat to keep his mind occupied. It beat steadily and he could feel the faint pulse just above his head where Sebastian's heart lay.

"I can't say, Ciel," Sebastian finally spoke. "I know you want an answer, but it's something I don't know and it's something you have discover on your own. If you want to stay friends with Alois, you'll find it in yourself to forgive him and accept the way he has become. You have to look at your friendship and ask if it's worth fighting for. You need to ask yourself why you're friends with him. I think then, you'll find an answer."

Ciel gave a weak laugh. "There's that maturity of yours again," he said.

Sebastian shook his head. "I have a friend who majored in psychology. She's far wiser than me. I'm simply repeating what she told me when I debated breaking up with Johan."

"Still mature," Ciel mumbled and closed his eyes. "I don't want to leave tomorrow."

"You can stay if you want," Sebastian answered just as quietly. "I don't mind putting you up for the rest of your stay here."

The urge to accept Sebastian's offer burned hotly on Ciel's tongue. He wanted it. He wanted nothing more than to continue staying in the loft and waking up to the smell of breakfast. To hear Sebastian laugh and watch Mey-rin bustle around as she cleaned the apartment. Ciel knew Sebastian wouldn't offer the suggestion if he really didn't want Ciel to stay.

It was a tempting offer.

But Ciel swallowed the hot desire, feeling it burn the whole way down and settle uneasily in his stomach. He couldn't keep burdening Sebastian with his company. Sebastian had a composition to write and hadn't touched it since Ciel came. Furthermore, Ciel had only asked to stay a month and that was all the time Sebastian had set aside for him. Anything else would hamper his composition.

Ciel would never forgive himself if he caused something to happen to Sebastian's career. Not only that, but if he stayed with Sebastian the rest of the summer, it wouldn't give him the chance to work on repairing his friendship with Alois. He wanted to stay friends, but staying with Sebastian and avoiding Alois wouldn't help matters.

It would only make the distrust and repugnance grow until their friendship turned into something beyond repair. Ciel didn't want to think that it had come to that, no matter how much he thought Alois had changed for the worse.

"Thank you," he said finally. "But I did promise Alois that I would stay with him for the summer. He might not keep his promises, but I do. Or at least I try. But I can still come visit you, yeah?"

Sebastian smiled. "Of course," he said and his fingers started moving again after having stopped earlier. "I think it's admirable for you to keep your agreement with him. You're a better person than me."

Ciel laughed. "I somehow doubt that." He looked up at Sebastian. "I hope that this will help rekindle our friendship, too."

"It's worth a shot," Sebastian admitted. He paused, debating with himself before speaking again. "And you're always welcome here. If you find that you can't stand to stay with him, you can come back to the apartment."

"Thanks," Ciel said. "And thank you for everything. You've done so much for me the past few weeks. I don't know how I can make it up to you."

Sebastian shook his head. "You don't need to make up anything. I enjoyed our time together. What time will he come pick you up tomorrow?"

A sigh. "Around two or so. Depends on when he wakes up, honestly." Ciel tried not to sound bitter but he couldn't stop the emotion from creeping into his voice.

The fingers slipped from his head down to his shoulder. Sebastian tapped him, urging him to sit up and Ciel tossed him a curious look. "That's less than twelve hours then," Sebastian said as he stood up. He walked around the length of the couch and neatly navigated the living room before coming to a stop in front of the piano. "I'd be remiss if I let you leave without hearing a song that you want so badly."

Ciel scrambled off the couch as Sebastian sat down at the piano bench. He found a perch on the desk next to the sleek black piano and watched as Sebastian opened the lid. Long fingers smoothed over the keys, caressing each one intimately and reacquainting himself to their touch.

The piano stretched before Sebastian, a mix of long white keys and short black ones, each piece of ivory and ebony producing a different sound. They spoke to Sebastian, and Ciel held his breath as skilled fingers settled over the keys.

The first key sank under the light touch and the rest followed, stealing the very breath from Ciel as he allowed Sebastian's music to surround him. It circled him, embracing him from every angle and if Ciel closed his eyes, he could see himself riding along the staff with Sebastian's hand guiding him along the way.

Like the notes, his emotions rose and fell as Sebastian played; leading him along in a dance that only music could create. They let him soar on wings Ciel didn't know he had.

It turned into a dance that didn't need steps, a language that didn't need words, and a beauty that didn't need sight. And it came wholly from Sebastian's heart and imagination.

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

Ciel's fingers drummed along his leg, beating out an anxious rhythm that outpaced his heart. He jerked his hand back as Soot swatted his fingers with her paw and she gave him an annoyed meow. He glared at her but Soot had already curled back up into a ball on Sebastian's lap.

"That's her way of telling you to relax," Sebastian teased and reached out to cover his hand, stopping the new rhythm that Ciel had started. "You're making us both nervous."

"I can't help it," Ciel groaned and his leg started to bounce in lieu of his fingers. "I don't know what to expect."

Sebastian laughed quietly. "That's most things in life. If you knew what would happen at every turn, I imagine things would be rather boring," he said. "But things will work out. I'm sure you'll have a good time with Alois."

Ciel grunted. "It's not so much Alois that I'm worried about. Rather his roommates. I already have a bad image of them and it's not easy to change my mind after a year of disliking them."

"With any luck, you two won't be at the apartment much and you won't have to deal with them that often," Sebastian said and smoothed his hand down Soot's back. She made a soft noise of content and stretched out her front legs, paws spreading out.

Ciel didn't say anything, choosing instead to lean against Sebastian's shoulder. He knew Sebastian wanted to stay optimistic but he didn't know Alois as well as Ciel did. Ciel knew how Alois and his habits had changed in the past month. They wouldn't leave the apartment until one, noon if they were lucky.

Alois never was a morning person and getting him to wake up before ten proved futile. Nothing would come from it and Alois tended to move around in a daze, barely registering anything until later in the day. It was best just to let him sleep in until the afternoon and go from there.

That meant Ciel had to stay by himself with Alois's roommates until Alois decided to wake up. Although Ciel had a feeling that no one else besides him would wake up early. Ciel grunted. At least then he wouldn't have to deal with anyone, even if it meant he was by himself for a few hours.

Ciel checked his phone again. Ten till four. "He should be here soon," he said.

Alois had called around three, saying he was awake and ready to pick Ciel up. They exchanged information and ever since, Ciel had waited impatiently for the doorbell to ring. He dreaded the sound and hoped that Alois would end up so lost that he would give up. Anything to give Ciel more time with Sebastian.

"You have everything?" Sebastian asked.

"Yeah," Ciel murmured. "I can call you whenever, right?"

Sebastian hummed. "You have my number," he said. He squeezed Ciel's hand, giving him a tentative smile. "And you know, if for whatever reason you want or need to come back, you're always welcome here."

Ciel's lips twitched into a small smile before it slipped away. He hated that he felt so emotional. He didn't even feel this bad when he left for college and his mother started crying when they left for the first time. But something about Sebastian made him feel warm and happy. Knowing that he had to leave that feeling had Ciel panicking and trying to cling to the source of his happiness.

He sighed heavily and tried not to look at his phone. "I started my trip the exact same way," he said suddenly. "Waiting for Alois to come pick me up. Only that time he never did. Maybe this time he won't either?"

"I'm sure he'll pick you up today," Sebastian said. "And who's to say that him forgetting you last time was a bad thing? It allowed me to meet you."

"That's true," Ciel said and squeezed Sebastian's hand. "And I had more fun in these few weeks than I'll probably have with Alois. Not to mention, you took me to far more places and did a better job than he would have."

He tugged at Sebastian's hand, pulling him closer. Sebastian didn't have to ask what he wanted and Ciel melted into the kiss, Sebastian's hands coming up cup his cheeks. Warm fingers soothed over his skin with a light touch that had Ciel shivering. He tried to press closer and almost sent them tumbling off the couch in his failed attempt.

They broke apart with light laughter and Sebastian pecked him on the lips one last time just as the doorbell rang. Ciel jolted at the sound and succeeded in falling off the couch. He winced and rubbed his shoulder before accepting Sebastian's outstretched hand. "That's probably Alois," he said once on his feet.

"Best not to keep him waiting," Sebastian said, voice resigned.

Ciel nodded and made his way to the foyer. He opened the door, hoping against everything that it was perhaps Claude or Victoria – hell, Ciel would even take Johan right now – standing on the front porch. As it was, Alois's grinning face met him and Ciel pushed a smile on his face.

"Glad you found the place, Alois," he said.

Alois looked over his shoulder and whistled lowly. "I didn't expect you to stay way down here. This is a nice place," he said. "You banging the owner or something?"

Ciel flushed hotly at the choice of words. He had hoped that Alois would wait to ask that until they were in the car and he wanted to shake Alois in frustration. "Ah, no. This is Sebastian," he said and gestured to Sebastian who stood behind him. "He rents the apartment and let me stay here."

Light blue eyes darted to look at Sebastian. "'Sup," he said and waved his hand, subtly trying to peer inside the apartment. "Nice pad."

"Thanks," Sebastian answered, his voice tight. "I'd invite you inside but I'm afraid the apartments rather messy right now." He shrugged.

Ciel didn't bother to call Sebastian out on the lie. He knew Sebastian couldn't stand a messy place and that Mey-rin had just finished cleaning the other day. Messy apartment and Sebastian just didn't go together in the same sentence. But he didn't say anything, knowing that Sebastian didn't want Alois inside his home.

Alois shrugged. "It's cool. We actually need to get going. Have plans tonight and don't want to make anyone late," he said cheerfully. He clapped Ciel on the shoulder. "Ready to go?"

"Yeah," Ciel said. "Let me get my bags."

"I'll get the trunk," Alois said and hopped down the steps.

Once gone, Ciel let heaved a long sigh. "I'm sorry about that," he said and stepped back inside to grab his first bag. "I had hoped he would keep his thoughts to himself until we were in the car at least."

Sebastian chuckled. "It's fine. Just remember what I told you earlier."

Ciel nodded as he set the first bag outside on the porch, letting Alois carry it back to the car. The bag banged noisily down the steps and Ciel shook his head as he went back inside for his final bags.

A hand settled on his and traced up his shoulder before Sebastian pressed a quick kiss on the side of his mouth. He made a frustrated noise when he missed and quickly adjusted, kissing Ciel on the mouth fully. They pulled apart and Sebastian offered him a warm smile. "Keep in touch," he said.

"I will," Ciel said as they walked back outside. He set his bags on the porch as Alois climbed the steps again. "That's the last of them," he told Alois.

"Great. I'll get these in the car and then we can head on out," Alois said and hefted the backpack on his shoulder.

Ciel watched him head to the car, tossing the pieces of luggage into the back before slamming the trunk shut. He waited for Alois to climb into the car and then turned his attention back to Sebastian. "Thanks again, for everything. I feel awful leaving this way."

Sebastian waved the comment aside. "We knew it would come eventually. Just came too soon," he stated and held out his hand. "Thanks for staying with me, Ciel. I had fun."

"Same," Ciel said and shook Sebastian's hand, even though he desperately wanted to give him a kiss goodbye.

But doing that in front of Alois would open up another can of worms that Ciel didn't want to touch. Alois would harass him endlessly, insisting that Ciel had slept with Sebastian to get a free place to stay. Just thinking about the impending storm that would bring had Ciel's head throbbing.

Not to mention, he hadn't exactly told Alois about his choice in lovers. When they parted, Ciel still hadn't found a way to tell Alois, too afraid that his friend would reject him. Recently, Ciel bulked at telling Alois anything about himself considering how much he thought the other had changed.

Their hands fell to the side and Ciel took a step back before he did something he shouldn't. "I'll let you know when I get in. Thanks again, Sebastian."

Sebastian nodded and waved as he went down the steps. Ciel hesitated for a brief moment when he opened the door and looked one last time at Sebastian. He could back out, Ciel knew that. He wanted it. But he already promised himself to give Sebastian time alone so he could work on his composition.

He slid into the car and slammed the door shut, giving one more wave to Sebastian even though he couldn't see it. The car eased away from the curb and Ciel's hand fell to his lap as Sebastian quickly vanished in the rear view mirror.

"So," Alois said as the car merged onto the highway. Ciel looked at him. "How did you end up in a swanky place like that? I mean, that guy has to be loaded or something to live the Arts District."

Ciel clicked his tongue. "His name is Sebastian," he said and Alois rolled his eyes. "He's a composer and is well known around the neighboring districts. And we met through one of his friends that happened to be at the airport the same time as me."

He didn't add that Sebastian was blind. Not for fear of what Alois would think of him for staying with a blind person, but instead, Alois would say about Sebastian. He felt a strong desire to protect Sebastian, even though he didn't stay with him anymore.

Alois grunted. "Well, he must be sleeping with someone."

"Alois!" Ciel exclaimed and ran a hand over his face. "He's a very successful composer. He doesn't need to sleep with anyone to get what he wants."

"Sure, sure," Alois claimed and waved his hand as they turned off the highway.

Ciel scowled and looked out the window as they moved away from the heavier parts of traffic. "You mentioned we had plans tonight. What are we doing?"

"You'll see," Alois said excitedly. "I've been dying to take you here. It'll be a lot of fun, promise. I missed you the past year, you know? I'm excited to take you around and show you my side of things."

Unbidden, a small smile crept across Ciel's lips at the words. They helped brush away some of the frustration he had felt towards Alois and he stubbornly clung to the hope that things would turn better. Like a fresh piece of paper in a notebook, they could start anew, forgetting about everything that happened in the past few months.

All the past arguments and fights would turn into water under the bridge. Perhaps Sebastian had a point. Alois just needed time to settle into his new surroundings and life, and eventually he would find his way back.

The car pulled into an apartment complex and came to a stop. "Whelp, here we are," Alois said and climbed out of the car. "We'll get your things inside and then you can meet everyone."

"Sounds great," Ciel said with a faint feeling of trepidation.

He grabbed his larger bag while Alois took the two smaller ones and followed him down the sidewalk. Alois had a faint bounce to his step and Ciel couldn't help but shake his head. Certain parts about Alois hadn't changed after all.

The door opened and they stepped inside the cool apartment, leaving behind the hot, dry air outside. Ciel sighed in relief as the cool air surrounded him along with loud voices further in the apartment. Alois hollered a greeting as the door slammed shut and a few voices answered.

They moved through the short hallway, passing two bedrooms on either side before entering the living room. Ciel swallowed the wince that tried to make its way up on his face at the sight of towering pizza boxes and empty beer cans on the floor.

"Guys, this is Ciel. My friend from back home," Alois said and slung an arm around Ciel. "Ciel, this is McMillan, Edgar Redmond, and Eric Slingby." He pointed to each one as he named them.

"Nice to meet you," Ciel said, trying his best to match names and faces. He remembered the names themselves after listening to Alois ramble on and on about his wonderful roommates, but it was the first time he had seen them.

Eric stepped forward. "Awesome, now that you're here, we can get ready to go."

Ciel's smile faltered. He had expected to spend the evening with just Alois. Not Alois and his roommates. "What are we doing?" he asked warily.

"We're going out of course," Alois stated. "There's a bar a few blocks over that has the hottest bartenders. They'll properly welcome you to the area. It's our favorite bar."

Ciel couldn't stop the scowl from forming on his face, his previous good mood leaving him. "I'm not really in the mood to drink right now."

He grunted as one of the guys – he didn't remember his name and found he didn't want to remember the name - clapped him on his shoulder. "That's even better. You can be the designated driver. It beats taking a cab back and gives us more money for drinks."

"I'd rather not," Ciel said flatly. "I don't know my way around here and I'm not one to tempt fate."

"No need to be such a prude," McMillan sniffed.

The tips of Ciel's ears burned but he refused to back down. He knew better than to navigate a stranger's car in a place he didn't know. That just asked for trouble and Ciel didn't want an expensive trip to the hospital plus whatever else would come from an accident.

"Hey now," Alois said, cutting in smoothly. "It's cool if he doesn't want to drive. So we take a cab. It's not like we don't usually do that."

Disgruntled mumbles circled throughout the bunch and Ciel's fingers curled into a fist. He could see the way they looked at him, eyeing him with abhorrence because he didn't think the same as them. They probably thought him a bore and looked down on him. Ciel snorted and shrugged their disgusted stares away.

He didn't care what they thought. They weren't his friends and if they didn't like him, Ciel could care less. The only person that mattered to him was Alois and so long as the situation didn't bother Alois, then Ciel would ignore them.

"Where can I put this stuff?" he asked, gesturing to his bags.

"In my room," Alois answered. "We'll head out in a bit, so you can unpack first."

Ciel nodded and followed Alois to his bedroom, feeling the annoyed glares boring into his back. He pointedly ignored them as best he could until they reached Alois's room.

"Just put your bags here," Alois said, gesturing to a cleared out spot. "I have an air mattress for you. You'll have to blow it up though, I didn't get around to it earlier."

"That's fine," Ciel said and maneuvered his bag to the corner.

Alois grinned and gave him a thumbs up. "Awesome. I'll leave you to unpack and settle in. We'll be in the living room when you're done."

Alois vanished from the room, leaving Ciel alone. He growled under his breath and kicked the nearest bag in frustration. The previous hope he held had started to flicker and vanish from his grasp. He only hoped this wasn't a preclude to how the rest of the summer would play out.


	10. Opus 10

**A/N**: This chapter is a bit shorter than the others but next one will be longer! I hope y'all enjoy it! ^^Many, many thanks to **socialbutrfly1379 **for being my amazing beta again! She was awesome working on this story :3

**Warnings**: Language

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Kuroshitsuji

* * *

Impatient fingers drummed out a random rhythm on the surface of the counter. The scent of toast filled the kitchen, barely masking the smell of spilled alcohol in front of the refrigerator. The pieces of toast popped up and Ciel snatched them out of the toaster. With jerky movements that barely masked his anger, he spread some peanut butter on the slices and then carried the plate to the living room.

Sunlight shone brightly through the living room window and Ciel chanced another look at the clock. Eleven o' clock. He resisted the desire to groan and instead, perched on the armrest of a recliner as he ate. It bothered him that it was getting later in the day and he still hadn't done anything. He couldn't do anything.

Alois still slept in his bedroom, along with the remainder of his roommates. Ciel had quickly learned that no one woke up before noon if they could help it.

He rubbed a hand over his face and then pinched the bridge of his nose for added measures. He knew this would happen if he stayed with Alois. Ciel had hoped to spend time with just Alois. Not Alois plus his roommates. It made for a terrible combination and if anything, the dislike between them deepened.

Only two days had passed since Ciel left Sebastian's apartment to stay with Alois and already, Ciel could feel his patience running thin. He could handle going out and having fun. Be it exploring town or partying. However, what he couldn't take was the constant bar hopping every night.

He wanted to do other things, but after staying out all night partying, the last thing Alois wanted to do the next morning was leave the apartment. So far, they hadn't even ventured outside the apartment gates. They went to the pool yesterday afternoon, but even then, Ciel had to put up with Alois's friends.

Ciel licked a few drops of peanut butter off his fingers. He wondered what Sebastian was up to. Was he working on his composition or was he simply sitting on the couch with Soot?

A soft smile stretched across Ciel's lips at the thought. He could easily see Sebastian on the couch with Soot curled up in his lap. No doubt, her body vibrated from her purrs and Sebastian would have a hand somewhere on her back. Sebastian once confided that he liked the feel of Soot's fur against his fingers because of how soft it was. Especially compared to the plush texture of her paws and the coarse touch of her tongue. Soot provided a plethora of sensory feelings for Sebastian.

For a moment, Ciel debated calling Sebastian. He knew he was awake. Sebastian almost always woke before Ciel, something he blamed Soot for. Still, Ciel hesitated. He didn't want to disturb Sebastian if he was working on his composition.

Instead, he stood up and carried the dish back to the kitchen. He washed it and placed it in the dishwasher before cleaning up the mess he made. He pointedly refused to touch the rest of the filth in the kitchen. Honestly, Ciel didn't know how anyone could stand to live like this. He knew Alois's mother would skin him alive if she saw how he lived.

But the problem remained out of Ciel's hands. He couldn't exactly force Alois to clean his room and living area just because Ciel thought it dirty. He doubted that would put him on better terms with his roommates either.

Ciel grunted and looked at his phone, pondering what game he could play today. He had to do something to keep himself entertained while he waited for Alois to wake up. He supposed he could read but with how frustrated Ciel felt, he doubted he would remember anything.

He looked up as someone's door open and watched as Alois stumbled into the living room. "You're up early," he drawled, unable to keep the annoyance from creeping into his voice.

"Not by choice," Alois muttered and winced at the bright light that flooded the apartment. "My stomach woke me up. It didn't feel well."

"I'm not surprised," Ciel grumbled and turned his attention back to his phone.

Alois didn't answer. A low groan left his mouth when he looked into the kitchen and backed away from the mess. "I'm so not cleaning that up," he stated.

Ciel grunted. "Don't look at me. I didn't partake in y'alls party last night." He paused, mouthing the words he just spoke and then shook his head. He knew Sebastian's southern words were a bad influence on him. Perhaps if he hadn't stayed up talking with Sebastian last night in Alois's room while everyone drank themselves sick.

"Aw, come on Ciel," Alois said and draped himself over the edge of the chair Ciel sat on. Foul breath wafted from his mouth and Ciel's stomach turned as he pushed Alois away. "Don't be that way. Smile."

Ciel shot Alois a dark look. "Don't tell me to smile," he hissed. "It's been two days since I came here and you have yet to do anything you promised me. I didn't come all this way just to sit inside the apartment all day waiting for you to get over your hangover, just to turn around and get another one."

Alois held up his hands. "Whoa, breathe Ciel," he teased. "It was the weekend, you know? I couldn't exactly go out as much last week because I had my exam to study for. The guys and I just wanted to have some fun."

"Well, the weekend is over," Ciel said and breathed in deeply before sighing heavily. "Monday is halfway over. Can we do something now?"

Light blue eyes darted to the window and then back to Ciel. "Ah, today might not work for my head. It's already painful enough sitting out here. But we can do something tomorrow." Alois cocked his head. "I'll even get to bed early tonight so we can leave a bit earlier tomorrow."

"That would be nice," Ciel muttered, although he highly doubted Alois would. Because he already knew how tonight would play out. Someone would suggest going out and Alois would agree without thought, leaving them right back where they started.

He hated that their friendship had turned into this. Where he couldn't even believe a word Alois said because the trust between them had vanished to the thinnest of threads. Everything Alois said, Ciel doubted and second-guessed, and it left Ciel frustrated. He wanted the trust back, but after all that Alois had ignored him in favor of new friends, he found that it wasn't as forthcoming as he had hoped.

A part of Ciel still hurt from the sting of betrayal. He tried his best to ignore it and accept what Sebastian had told him, that he had to give Alois time, but it wasn't that easy.

Ciel sighed and looked out the window. The sun continued to burn hotly outside, heating the air and making it shimmer against the pavement. The heat looked enough to suffocate anyone, yet Ciel felt the stifling air inside the apartment and he yearned to escape its smothering grasp. Another look at the clock showed that it wasn't quite noon and Ciel stood up, tired of staying inside.

"I think I'm going for a walk," he muttered.

Alois looked at him as though he were insane. "A walk? In this heat?" he shook his head. "You're crazy. It's way too hot to go out and do anything right now."

Ciel grunted. "For the past month I spent nearly every day outside and walking around the nearby districts," he pointed out. "I think I can handle a short walk."

"It's hotter this month than it was last month," Alois stated.

"Then I'll go to the pool," Ciel countered. At least there he could enjoy the sights and see something other than the inside of a filthy apartment.

Alois shrugged. "If you want. Although I don't see the appeal of going outside in this heat right now, but I guess the pool will help take some of the heat away."

Ciel nodded and decided not to argue anymore. Just let Alois think what he wanted and Ciel could swallow his thoughts. He was already in a bad mood and the sooner he left the apartment to get away from everything, the quicker he could relax. With any luck, it would let him avoid Alois's roommates for a while as well.

"I'll just get my things," Ciel muttered and brushed past Alois.

This wasn't what he wanted when he came back to stay with Alois. A part of him may have expected something like this would've happened, but not to this degree. It left Ciel frustrated and he yearned to crawl back to Sebastian's side. But, he shook his head and ground his teeth together, trying his best to bear with the current situation.

He could stick this out, Ciel knew he could. But knowing that didn't chase away the feeling of melancholy.

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

Ciel groaned and batted away a persistent pest. Vaguely, he wondered why he couldn't hear the tinkling jingle of Soot's bell and his eye cracked open. Alois's grinning face greeted him instead of Soot's paw and Ciel stared at him. "Alois?" he questioned, eyebrows furrowed slightly.

"Of course," Alois chirped. "And it's time for you to wake up, sleepy head. We're in for a long day."

"What are you talking about?" Ciel asked and he sat up, rubbing his eyes.

Alois made a soft noise. "We're going out today, remember? Just you and me, exploring the town like I said."

Ciel's head swam and he blinked a few times to clear the feeling. He looked at the clock, surprised to see that it read nine thirty and then looked back at Alois. "But I thought," he started and then stopped to pinch the bridge of his nose. "Give me a few minutes to change and then we can go."

"Kay," Alois said and flittered out of the room.

Ciel watched him go, still struggling to wrap his mind around everything. He gave himself a sharp pinch to make sure he wasn't dreaming and hissed when his skin protested the action. It told him that he wasn't asleep still and Ciel ran a hand through his hair, surprised at the situation.

Alois had kept his promise.

The words circled his mind and peppered his thoughts. The impossible had become possible and Ciel couldn't stop the feeling of welcoming relief from spreading through his body. For once, Alois had come through and today they had a chance to do the things they had planned. He would have a whole day to spend with Alois and actually enjoy his friends company.

Ciel stood up and stretched, a small smile flickering across his lips. Perhaps Sebastian was right. All Alois needed was time before he settled down. It had taken a while, much longer than Ciel wanted, but it had happened eventually. With any luck, this progress would continue for the rest of his trip and they could truly start to mend their friendship.

He dressed quickly and grabbed his effects before going out into the living room. A part of Ciel still worried that if he took too long to get ready, Alois would find a way to wiggle out of going anywhere today. It bothered him that he thought that way, but after a year of Alois letting him down, it had become engrained in his mind. A defense mechanism of sorts.

"Ready?" he asked.

Alois nodded. "Yeah. We'll get breakfast after we had out. There's this breakfast place about ten minutes or so from here that has the best breakfast in town. Their pancakes take up the whole plate and you won't want to eat anything for the rest of the day."

Ciel laughed as they stepped outside. The morning sun caressed his skin and warmed his face as they made their way to the car. "Will I even want to move after eating something like that?" he questioned as he slid into the car.

"Haha, maybe," Alois said and started the car. "If not, I'm sure I can roll you around."

"Charming," Ciel teased and relaxed in the seat. He fell back quickly into the familiar banter with Alois and for once, everything felt normal between them. Away from his roommates, Alois eased back into the person he was before he left and Ciel found that it only proved his theory. Alois's roommates were a bad influence.

Soon enough, they pulled into the parking lot of a quaint restaurant and the smell of breakfast wafted through the air. Ciel's stomach growled and they went inside, the waiter quickly seating them. He handed them menus and Ciel wasted little time looking over the offered selection. French toast caught his attention and gave Ciel pause, reminding him of Sebastian.

"Know what you want?" Alois asked.

Ciel set the menu aside. "Yeah. I think I'll get the Cowboy Deluxe'," he said, deciding to forego the French toast. Eating them would only remind him of Sebastian, and Ciel had a feeling that they wouldn't taste nearly as good as the ones Sebastian made.

"Sounds good," Alois said and sipped at his water. "So, what are you going to do now that you've graduated? Try to find a job or something?"

"Somewhat," Ciel answered. "I talked to some companies that hire in my field and almost all of them told me that I would have a better chance of getting hired if I had a master's degree."

Alois made a face. "Even more schooling?" he asked. "That sounds like torture. I say you skip that and the financial drain, and just look for a job now."

Ciel shook his head. "I'll still look for jobs, mainly internships. Those are my bet and will increase my chance of hire along with a master's degree." He stuck the straw into the glass. "Besides, a master's is only two more years. That'll go by quickly."

"If you say so," Alois mumbled and looked around the room.

"What about you?" Ciel questioned. "Any plans? I know it's still a few years away for you but I'm sure you at least have an idea."

Laughter left Alois's mouth. "Nah. Why would I look now? I still have time and I'm not in a rush. Besides, it's already hard enough with just classes. I had to drop my part time job earlier." He paused to give his order to the waiter. Ciel gave his and the waiter left. "But yeah. I'd rather spend my time enjoying my college experience than worrying about work and all that. Why work now when I'll have to do that for the rest of my life?"

Ciel's eyebrow twitched at the nonchalant attitude. "What about your student loans and tuition?"

Alois waved a hand. "I have enough to cover what I need." He cocked his head at the look Ciel gave him. "Relax, Ciel. I got all this figured out. I promise. I study and get the grades I need, and enjoy myself. Isn't that the grand college experience?"

Ciel grunted. "For some I guess."

"Come on, Ciel. Don't tell me you didn't go out and party at least once during your college years?" Alois said.

"I did," Ciel answered. "I went to my fair share of parties and had fun, but I also knew how to balance everything. I had several scholarships to worry about as well. If I failed a class or dropped below a 3.0 GPA, they cut me off. I couldn't afford that." He had worked too hard to make it through college without student loans, applying to every scholarship available. Time consuming, but well worth the effort when he graduated without debt.

Alois clicked his tongue. "You're just an overachiever," he teased.

Ciel's hand tightened around his drink briefly. "It's what I wanted," he said. He didn't add that he would rather be an overachiever than be in the position Alois had put himself in.

"I suppose," Alois stated and then leaned forward, a sly leer on his face. "Did you at least get laid?"

Ciel sputtered and coughed to clear his throat. His face burned from the bluntness of the question and he looked around quickly to see if anyone had heard Alois's question. "Did you have to ask that now?" he hissed. "Why couldn't you have waited until we were in the car at least?"

Alois huffed. "Is that a no then?" He shook his head and looked around the restaurant. "We'll have to fix that then while you're down here. Edgar said no male should remain a virgin after age sixteen."

"Where did he derive that brilliant deduction?" Ciel asked sarcastically. "The Internet?"

"His uncle," Alois answered. "He works for a fashion magazine and knows everything. He always has the most attractive women hanging from his arms."

Ciel rolled his eyes. "So that automatically makes him the expert?" he drawled.

Alois nodded. "Of course. Now let's see what we have," he said looked around the room. His eyes briefly landed on a pair of women sitting close together in the corner of the room. "Not those two. They're lesbians," he said and his nose crinkled slightly before he turned from them, eyes narrowed.

"Alois, its fine, really," Ciel started, trying to stop Alois from setting him up. That was the last thing he needed.

Alois waved a hand at him, ignoring his words. His features smoothed out as he paused at a table with two more females sitting across from each other. "There we go. Much better," he said. "The one on the right would work but not the left."

Ciel glanced at them but he couldn't find anything wrong with either of them. They both looked normal and like nice women, provided he liked that gender. "What's wrong with the one on the left?"

"Her boobs are too small. Women aren't attractive when they're that size."

Ciel's head smacked against the table and he sucked in a deep breath before lifting his head again. "Alois," he started. "Let me save you the trouble. I've already lost my virginity, I promise. I had a few relationships in college, okay? I just don't like talking about that in the middle of a fucking restaurant."

Alois stopped looking and turned his attention back to him, a wide grin on his face. "Why didn't you say so earlier then? I was a bit worried for you. Thought you hadn't popped that cherry of yours yet." He winked. "Just looking out for ya, Ciel."

"Thanks," Ciel said and massaged his temples. "But trust me; you don't have to worry about that. I can take care of myself in the dating department, thanks." He already had Sebastian and that was more than enough for Ciel.

He looked up as the waiter came back to their table with their food, effectively cutting off whatever Alois wanted to say next. Ciel tossed the man a grateful look and hurriedly tucked into his meal even though his appetite had waned ever since the start of their conversation. He didn't want to continue their current discussion. It left his stomach churning with something he couldn't quite place.

Disappointment or disgust, he wasn't sure. It varied between the two feelings and others, but Ciel tried his best not to dwell on them. Thinking about it would only make him annoyed with Alois for his way of thinking. Ciel didn't agree with Alois's logic, but maybe straight men looked at things differently?

Ciel snorted to himself. _Keep telling yourself that one, Ciel. Maybe you'll convince yourself. You're only trying to make an excuse for him because he's your friend._

He pushed a piece of pancake around the plate, soaking up the excess syrup. Ciel didn't bother to argue with himself, he already knew he spoke the truth. Some part of him strove to overlook Alois's flaws as best he could in hopes it would keep their friendship afloat.

"This is good," Ciel said in an attempt to keep his circling thoughts at bay.

"Yeah," Alois said and stabbed a piece of sausage. "And price wise, they're not too bad. Considering all that you get. This place is really popular with athletes after morning practice."

Ciel nodded and passed his empty plate to the waiter. All that remained were the pancakes but looking at how large they were, he had a feeling he wouldn't finish them all. "I can see why," he said and took a bite of his pancake.

The rest of their breakfast passed with small snippets of conversation and by the time they left, Ciel swore he had gained at least five pounds. His stomach protested loudly and Alois snickered as they climbed back into the car. "Don't worry. It'll take an hour or so to walk around the campus and then we'll catch a bus up to the Galleria." The car pulled out of the parking lot. "We'll walk around there for several hours. That'll help quiet your stomach."

"Hopefully," Ciel said as the buildings flashed by outside. "I don't know how anyone can finish all that in one sitting."

"You've never seen a hungry football player after practice," Alois said and laughed. He glanced at Ciel from the corner of his eye. "Are you sure that you want to see the campus though? I know we talked about it, but I don't see anything exciting about it. It's just another campus."

Ciel shrugged. "They have a good graduate program that I looked at. And I don't mind walking around your campus. I've wanted to see it since you came down here." The car turned down another road. "You never tell me anything about it when I ask."

Alois gave a vague gesture. "Well, I didn't think there was much to talk about. It's just a college, you know?" His nose crinkled. "Nothing exciting about that."

"We just have different opinions on things I guess," Ciel murmured.

A sign for the university flashed by and Ciel leaned his head against the window. Once before, he thought about coming to the university for graduate school. It had the right programs he sought and as an added plus, Alois went to the same school. But as they seemed to grow further apart, Ciel found himself questioning the choice to apply or not.

Still, since he was here, Ciel didn't want to pass up the chance to see the program for himself. The campus looked beautiful, covered with lush, mature trees that offered shade. A flowing fountain bubbled in front of a nearby building and Ciel had to admit that the university took wonderful care of its grounds.

"Shall we?" he asked and looked at Alois.

Alois sighed heavily; no doubt unhappy to that he was back on campus when he had no need to be there. Ciel ignored him and started forward, anxious to see more of the tastefully designed college.

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

People milled around the food court, their voices mingling together and filling the air. Ciel watched them move around as he nibbled on an ice cream cone. Next to him, Alois dug into a sundae as they enjoyed each other's company.

True to Alois's word, they had spent hours exploring the large mall. Ciel hadn't spent much time at the Galleria when he first went, too guilty over how he had treated Sebastian to enjoy himself. This time around though, he enjoyed the sights much more and had spent most of the time laughing with Alois.

Things felt normal and Ciel couldn't keep the smile off his face. "What are we doing tomorrow?" he asked and took another bite of the cone.

Alois hummed. "I'm not too sure."

"Do you want to head out to one of the districts?" Ciel questioned. He had already been, but he wouldn't mind going again with Alois.

"Well," Alois started and leaned back in his chair. "Tomorrow might not be good. The guys want to go out tonight and since I couldn't stay out late last night, I missed out."

Ciel's smile fell and suddenly the rest of his ice cream cone didn't look as appetizing. "You go out with them every night it seems like," he pointed out.

Alois shrugged. "Yeah, but I like hanging out with them. They know how to have a good time." He took another bite of his sundae. "But how about this? Not tomorrow but the day after, we'll all go out somewhere. There's a water park about forty-five minutes or so from here we could all go to."

"Do your roommates have to come?" Ciel asked. Alois gave him a strange look and Ciel pressed on. "Look, Alois. I came down here expecting to spend time with you. Not you and your roommates, but you. And so far, I've only spent one day with you. It's really frustrating."

"They're my roommates though," Alois argued. "Of course I want to spend time with them. It's not like I can ignore them. I live with them."

Ciel scowled. "But it's okay to ignore me? I've known you longer than anyone in that apartment and I'm your guest." His hands balled into fists and his voice quivered with anger. "You can't go a month with constantly being attached to the hip with your roommates?"

"That's not fair to them," Alois stated and jabbed his spoon into a scoop of ice cream. "What do you have against them anyway? I know you don't like them but I don't understand why."

Ciel pinched the bridge of his nose and tried his best to will his anger away. It wouldn't help in a situation like this and he would only end up snapping even more at Alois. That wouldn't get them anywhere, to say the least. But knowing that didn't help keep his lips from twisting into a scowl and his eyes narrowing.

"Because I think they're a bad influence, Alois," he said and tried his best to keep from crossing his arms across his chest. That would give him a hostile and threatening appearance, putting Alois even more on edge. "You never acted this way before you left home. Now you're skipping classes all the time, always going out, and…," he trailed off.

"And what, Ciel?" Alois snapped.

Ciel bit his lip before deciding to plow forward. "You've changed, Alois. I think for the worst." He leaned forward. "Like what you said this morning. You would've never said those things before."

Alois's eyebrows furrowed. "Everyone changes. It's part of life. You can't stop that, Ciel." He shook his head. "And so what if I changed? I'm happy with how things are right now. I don't see anything wrong with it at all and neither does anyone else. The only person who has a problem with it is you."

"Because I'm worried about you," Ciel growled. "You're my friend, Alois. You think I want to see you flunk out of college because your grades are too low? Or end up in the hospital with alcohol poisoning or something else? Why can't you see that I'm just concerned about you and actually listen to what I'm telling you?"

"And why can't you just accept that I've changed a bit?" Alois argued back. "This is my life. I don't need you trying to tell me how to live it or trying to control it."

Ciel scowled. "I'm not trying to do either of those things," he said and his nails dug into his palms. "I'm just…" he stopped and shook his head, feeling the frustration swell and press against him until his head spun. He didn't want to debate this anymore, it wasn't getting them anywhere and Alois remained steadfast in his claims. He wasn't going to change no matter what Ciel told him.

It hurt but more than the pain, it left Ciel feeling disgusted. He couldn't understand why Alois couldn't and wouldn't understand what he tried to tell him. He was only looking out for him and trying to be a good friend. But somehow, that had backfired against him and turned Ciel into the bad person.

"Just forget it. Forget I said anything in the first place," he said and stood up. The ice cream had melted in his cone and Ciel tossed it into a nearby trashcan, gazing at the bin in disgust. "Let's just go back to the apartment. I'm sure you want to go out with your roommates and I'd be a horrible friend to keep you from them," he spat.

"Works for me," Alois said and stood up as well. He threw his sundae away and shoved his hands into his pockets as they started to walk out of the food court. "You know, maybe it's not me so much that has changed but you," Alois stated.

Ciel didn't say anything and simply made a noncommittal sound. He didn't want to think about their strained friendship anymore. It hurt too much and left his vision swimming with anger.

The ride back to the apartment remained in silence and thick, awkward tension sat heavily in the car. It suited Ciel just fine, as he still didn't want to talk and the only thing on his mind was calling Sebastian after everyone left. His resolution not to bother Sebastian had already started to crumble and this incident earlier had it falling apart even quicker.

He hadn't even stayed with Alois for a full week and already Ciel felt miserable. This wasn't what he wanted when he agreed to visit Alois and he almost found himself regretting his choice to come down. The only thing that made the whole situation better was Sebastian.

The car pulled into a parking spot at the apartment and Alois wasted little time scampering inside the apartment. Ciel followed at a more leisurely pace and wasn't surprised to see bottles of liquor already sitting on the kitchen counter. He muttered an excuse and slipped into Alois's room so he didn't have to deal with anyone.

On the other side of the door, he could hear someone – probably McMillan – mixing a drink for Alois as they talked about where they wanted to go for the night. By the sounds of it, they would hit up a few clubs before heading back home. It gave Ciel several hours alone once they left in an hour or so and he fished out his phone from his pocket.

His fingers easily dialed a familiar number and a few rings later, Sebastian's voice filled the speakers. "My, my, you're calling much earlier tonight," he teased and Ciel's shoulders relaxed at the soothing voice. "I thought you two had grand plans for today?"

Ciel shook his head. "So did I," he said and sunk onto the air mattress. "But we hit a snag at the mall and came back early."

Sebastian hummed. "A snag, huh? Why do I feel that there's more to that statement than what you're really letting on?"

He laughed lightly. "Always the mature one," he murmured. "We had an argument, oh wise one, and then we came back early because Alois wanted to go out tonight since he couldn't yesterday. And here I am." His voice hardened and Ciel glared at the wall.

For a long time, Sebastian didn't say anything but Ciel didn't push him for an answer. He knew that Sebastian took time to compose his thoughts at times, mainly when it regarded serious topics. Ciel took comfort in the silence though and if he strained, he could just hear the faint sounds of Mey-rin cooking in the background and a slightly louder jingle of Soot's collar.

"I'm going to guess that y'all aren't going to do anything tomorrow then," Sebastian finally said carefully.

"Not really. Alois offered to go to the water park the day after, but he wanted to bring his roommates along," Ciel said bitterly. "I just wanted to spend time with my friend this summer. Just the two of us but he seems to think it's a travesty to ignore his roommates for even a day. Even though it's all right to do the same thing to me."

Sebastian clicked his tongue and in the background, Soot cried loudly. He soothed her with a quiet noise before speaking again. "Ciel, do you want to come over tomorrow?" he asked. "You're not happy; I can hear it in your voice. Staying there is only making things worse for you and I think you're only torturing yourself that way."

Ciel's eyes closed and his mantra of 'don't bother Sebastian' brushed against his mind like waves lapping at the shore. Beforehand, it crashed violently against his thoughts and kept him from wavering. The words screamed loudly in his mind, steeling his resolve. But as the days passed, the words had seemed to scream themselves hoarse and the aggressive waves had calmed.

It remained harder and harder to convince himself otherwise and Ciel gripped the phone tightly. "Are you sure?" he whispered. A stark contrast to when Sebastian first offered him a helping hand last week.

"I'm positive, Ciel." Sebastian's voice soothed the words and finally stilled them until they resembled a calm lake. Still and tranquil. "You won't bother me at all and truthfully, I could use the company. Mey-rin has a seminar over the weekend and she has to leave tomorrow morning since it's out of state."

Ciel chuckled. "Ah, and now the truth reveals itself. You just want the company, not that you miss me or anything," he teased.

"If only it were that simple," Sebastian said and Ciel could almost hear the smirk in his words. "As it is, Mey-rin is listening from the kitchen and what I really want to tell you are for your ears alone." From the background, Ciel heard Mey-rin shout. 'I am not!' before a pan clattered against the floor.

"You've made your point," Ciel said, a smile stretching across his lips. "I suppose I'll have to wait until tomorrow to hear what you wanted to tell me."

Sebastian nodded. "Gives you something to look forward to," he said and shifted on the couch, the material rubbing against his clothes. "So, I'll take that as a yes that you'll visit tomorrow?"

Ciel hummed. "Yeah, I'll be there." He paused. "How exactly am I getting there?"

"Claude can pick you up tomorrow on his way to work," Sebastian said. "I'll double check with him after dinner and call you with the details."

"Sounds good," Ciel said and winced as a door slammed. The apartment filled with silence and he sighed, leaning his head against the wall. "That sounds really good. Thank you, Sebastian."

Sebastian made a soft noise. "It's not a problem, Ciel." He paused and his voice lowered considerable. "I've missed you too, so this is just as much for me as it is you."

Ciel laughed at that but his heart started to race a little faster at the words. "I've missed you too," he said. "What's Mey-rin making for dinner? Oh, and speaking of food. There's this restaurant here that Alois took me too this morning. I need to take you there, it was really good," Ciel said, easily slipping into a comfortable conversation with Sebastian.

If he closed his eyes and let his imagination go, he could almost pretend he was back in Sebastian's apartment. That Sebastian sat next to him on the couch and they could enjoy each other's company. The image surrounded him, enveloping his senses as Sebastian answered his questions and responded with a few of his own, and Ciel's shoulders relaxed.

Tomorrow couldn't come soon enough.

* * *

**A/N**: One last note ^^ I'm taking requests or prompts for drabbles! I'm currently wrestling with writer's block and a friend suggested that I write some drabbles to help overcome it. So far (knock on wood) it's working a bit, lol. So if you have any ideas that you'd like to see, feel free to drop me a message! ^^


	11. Opus 11

**A/N**: **Please read the warnings for this chapter!** Many, many thanks to **socialbutrfly1379 **for being my amazing beta again! She was awesome working on this story :3

**Warnings**: **strong language, offensive slurs, and homophobia**

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Kuroshitsuji

* * *

The sun hid behind the morning clouds as Ciel stood outside the apartment building, hands stuffed into his pockets. He bounced impatiently on his feet, waiting for Claude's car to come into view. He barely slept any last night, knowing that he would get to see Sebastian the next day. At one point though, he must've fallen asleep as the loud slamming of a door jolted him awake.

A quick look at his phone showed two in the morning and Alois came stumbling into his room soon after. From out in the living room, Ciel could hear drunken laughter and he tried his best to ignore them. Eventually he fell asleep and woke up to his alarm clock a few hours later. Much to Ciel's chagrin, Claude had an early shift and Ciel stumbled out of the bed at six thirty.

He felt more awake as he waited for Claude, but Ciel knew the moment he sat down he would crash. A yawn escaped his lips and brought tears to the corners of his eyes. Ciel rubbed them away and then scrubbed at his face in an attempt to stay focused.

His eyes darted over his shoulder when a door opened and for a moment, he worried that someone had already woken up. But the person turned out to be someone walking their dog and he let out a sigh of relief. Ciel hadn't bothered to tell anyone he would leave for the day and a part of him doubted that Alois would even notice his absence.

Ciel turned his attention back to the parking lot and perked up when a cop car drove into the parking lot. He started forward and opened the door when it came to a stop.

"Morning, kid," Claude said as he slid into the car and slammed the door shut. "Couldn't even last a week without seeing your boyfriend?" he teased.

"I'm not even going to answer that," Ciel stated and eyed the coffee that sat in a cup holder. "So how did you get roped into picking me up? I have a feeling this is out of your way and the way Sebastian spoke, it sounded like you owed him a favor."

Claude pushed up his glasses. "Ah well, about that," he started. "A few years back, I commandeered Sebastian's phone for a few hours, switched around the ringtones, and then locked his phone. Of course, his mom came down for a visit that same day. For the rest of the day, his phone kept moaning and making perverse sounds. His mom thought it was hilarious but Sebastian always put his best forward when she was around. Suffice to say, that wasn't his best."

Ciel snickered. "I don't know what I should laugh at. The fact that you did that or the fact that his mom found it funny."

"Yes, well, Sebastian called in that favor," Claude stated and reached for his coffee. "Although, it's not like my little trick got him in trouble or anything with his mom. He was just embarrassed for a while."

"I can see why," Ciel said and silence settled in the car as Claude nursed his drink.

The rich smell filled the air and Ciel sucked in a deep breath. Hopefully Sebastian still had coffee left over; he would need some in a few hours. He already had plans to go back to sleep upon arriving at Sebastian's apartment. A few more hours of sleep wouldn't hurt and it would keep him from turning cranky later on in the day.

He watched the scenery rush by, the city growing larger as they approached it and Ciel leaned his head against the window. The tall buildings gleamed against the morning sun and many of the opaque windows reflected the bright rays. A stray cloud slipped in front of the sun, temporarily obscuring the beams and Ciel's eyes relaxed against the bright light.

Claude grunted as he set the cup of coffee into the cup holder. "TGIFT."

Ciel glanced at him, eyebrows furrowed. "Isn't it TGIF?"

Claude shook his head. "Usually. But today isn't Friday. Today is Thursday. So, TGIFT," he stated. "Thank God It's Friday Tomorrow."

"I don't think it works that way," Ciel muttered and turned to look out the window again. "Shouldn't it be TGTIF? Thank God Tomorrow is Friday?"

"Hey," Claude said. "Don't burst my happy acronym. You can't switch an original around like that."

Ciel snorted. "You also shouldn't mess with an original, but you did that already."

Claude scowled and the car started to drift to the shoulder. "I should leave you right here and make you walk the rest of the way," he threatened.

Ciel smirked. "That would be better than having to deal with you the rest of the way," he said. "I seriously pity your girlfriend. How does she put up with you?"

"I know how to please her," Claude said simply and Ciel blanched.

"I really could've done without knowing that."

A chuckle left Claude's mouth as he turned down a familiar road. "That's what you get for picking on my amazing acronym."

Ciel rolled his eyes as the car came to a stop. He still had trouble at times understanding how he was such good friends with Sebastian. It didn't seem like they had anything in common, yet they acted almost like brothers. Ciel supposed it was one of the many mysteries of the universe.

"Thanks for the ride," he said and climbed out of the car.

"Not a problem," Claude said and waved. "Tell Sebastian we're even now."

Humming, Ciel shut the door and gave a final wave to Claude before jogging up the few steps to Sebastian's door. He rang the doorbell and waited patiently for it to open. He stepped back when Mey-rin opened the door and she smiled at him. "Morning."

"Morning," Ciel said. He slipped inside and shut the door behind him. "You're up early."

"My flight leaves around nine so I'm leaving in an hour," she said. "Sebastian is still asleep, although he said to wake him up when you arrived."

Ciel nodded. "I'll go wake him up then. You need to finish getting ready I'm sure."

Mey-rin gave him a grateful look and Ciel moved down the hallway to Sebastian's room. He cracked open the door and stuck his head inside, squinting at the lump on the bed that was Sebastian. He rapped lightly on the door, hoping the noise would wake him up but Sebastian barely moved. A smaller figure moved though and a muffled mewl came from the depths of the blanket.

A second later, Soot wiggled her way out of the blanket and jumped to the floor. She stretched her body, raising her rump in the air and yawning as her claws dug into the carpet. Once done, she trotted over to him and started to twine between his ankles, purring loudly.

"Good morning to you too," Ciel said and then sneezed. "How about waking up Sebastian for me."

She simply blinked at him and made her way back to the bed. Her tail flicked once before she jumped back onto the bed and burrowed her way into the covers.

For a moment, Ciel thought that she had decided to listen to him but as the seconds stretched into minutes, he knew she had gone back to sleep. He huffed and moved closer to the bed. Never leave a job to a cat; he thought to himself as he shook Sebastian's shoulder.

He yelped when a warm hand grabbed his wrist and pulled him down onto the bed. He face planted into the pillows before a soft chuckle reached his ears. Ciel grumbled and lifted his head, starting at Sebastian's face. "You bastard. You were already awake, weren't you."

"I heard the doorbell ring," he said, voice thick from sleep.

"So why didn't you get up?" Ciel asked and poked Sebastian in the chest. "Lazy ass."

Sebastian smirked. "It's still early and I knew I could fall back asleep if I didn't leave my warm, comfortable bed," he said and his fingers traced up the length of Ciel's arm.

Ciel shuddered at the touch. "Again, I'll call you a lazy ass."

"Am I?" Sebastian asked. "Well, I didn't inflate the air mattress so I suppose that could make me one. Or perhaps I did that because I thought you would enjoy sleeping in a normal bed for once."

"Oh," Ciel murmured as Sebastian's fingers trailed back down his arm and lightly brushed against the tips of his fingertips. He brought them to his mouth and pressed a light kiss to them. "It has been a while since I slept in a bed."

Crimson eyes closed. "Care to join me then?" He shifted on the bed, making more room for Ciel.

Briefly, Ciel remembered that Sebastian would more than likely turn him into a human teddy bear but he pushed the thought away. He had gone almost a week without Sebastian's touch and he yearned for the familiar embrace. Without further thought, Ciel shifted underneath the covers and buried his face into a pillow.

Sebastian's scent surrounded him and he inhaled deeply, imprinting the smell to memory. He pressed his nose further into the soft material and sighed before rolling onto his side. Next to him, Sebastian had already fallen back asleep and Ciel reached forward, gently touching the calm face. His fingers skimmed down the slope of Sebastian's nose and then followed the bow of his lips.

He followed the curve of Sebastian's jaw up to his ear and then carefully traced the spot under hidden crimson eyes. Sebastian's eyelids fluttered but he otherwise didn't wake up, leaving Ciel free to stroke the area one more time before withdrawing his hand.

Ciel hesitated before swallowing his nervousness. He shifted closer and placed a light kiss on Sebastian's lips. He sighed lowly at the simple but familiar action and closed his eyes as well. His heart still raced in his chest, beating out a steady tempo that pulsed in his ears but Ciel couldn't stop the small smile from appearing on his face.

In a way, it felt like coming home.

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

"And then he has the gall to tell me that I'm the one who changed compared to him," Ciel spat as he paced the apartment, unable to keep still any longer. For the past hour after breakfast, he had ranted and raved about his time spent with Alois, or lack thereof. Sebastian had listened calmly as they sat on the couch and continued to listen even after Ciel started his pacing.

Ciel had started telling the story bit by bit, the pieces coming out like a slowly trickling river but after a while the dam had broken and everything came rushing forward. The words spilled from Ciel's mouth, each word coming quicker than the last until he could barely contain his emotions.

He ran an aggravated hand through his hair. "I mean, I don't understand how Alois can even think to say that to me when he is the one who so clearly changed." Ciel huffed, his chest rising and falling while his heart continued to race. It wasn't until he stopped to catch his breath that he realized his voice had gradually risen until he was shouting at Sebastian. "Sorry."

Sebastian waved a hand. "It's fine. Keep going, get it all out."

Ciel plunged forward with the suggestion. It felt good to have someone listen when Alois all but refused to hear him out and Ciel poured his annoyance into his words, spittle sometimes leaving his mouth as he picked up his pacing again.

"I'm not the one who changed, Sebastian," Ciel almost shouted. "Alois is. He's just too stubborn to listen and too much in love with his new roommates to see that they're actually harming him. He just frustrates me so much because I'm trying to help but he won't see reason. And just, ugh!" He dropped down heavily onto the couch and cradled his head in his hands, shaking it lightly.

He sighed deeply and all the energy he had escaped his body alongside the sigh. It left him feeling drained and Ciel slumped back against the cushions, the fight gone from his shoulders.

"Are you done?" Sebastian asked. His voice wasn't teasing but oddly serious and Ciel took comfort in the tone.

"Yeah, I think so."

Sebastian hummed and held open his arms, an open invitation to join him closer on the couch. Ciel accepted without thought and let Sebastian pull him into a tender embrace. He exhaled again and buried his face into Sebastian's chest. A part of him felt bad for dropping his problems onto Sebastian, especially considering how their morning was when they woke up a few hours ago.

True to Ciel's prediction, he woke up entwined in Sebastian's embrace – warm and comfortable in his arms. Sebastian was already awake, on the cusp of truly waking up and falling back asleep. Realizing that Ciel had woken as well, Sebastian murmured good morning and then captured Ciel's lips, drawing the last remnants of sleep from them both.

"Morning nookie?" Ciel asked after they parted and they both laughed lightly before Sebastian drew him into another searing kiss.

They probably would've stayed in bed all day if Soot hadn't demanded breakfast in the most infuriating way – by literally pouncing her way up their bodies and sitting on Ciel's head, crying loudly for attention. Exasperating creature.

Fingers threaded through his hair, drawing his thoughts away from their peaceful morning and bringing him back to the present. Ciel looked up at Sebastian and watched him silently. Sebastian hadn't spoken yet, but his face held a serene expression; one of deep thought.

"Why," Sebastian spoke finally. "Do you say that you haven't changed?"

"Because I haven't," Ciel answered. "He's the one that changed, not me."

Sebastian hummed. "You haven't?" he asked and carded his fingers through his hair again. "You've changed a bit since you first came here. Look how much you've changed around me, for example."

Ciel grunted. "I suppose," he muttered.

"You have, I promise. When you first came here, you felt awkward around me but realized how you acted and strove to make yourself better," Sebastian said. "You might not have changed the same way you claim Alois has, but you have changed. It's been a gradual one while you were here, but I don't think it's a bad one."

"Alois was correct though," he continued and Ciel watched Sebastian through his eyelashes, finding his voice soothing. "Everyone changes. It's how we grow and learn about ourselves. We need to change in order to adapt. Whether you made the right change or not though is something you can't always see at first. Usually you discover that later in life."

Ciel grunted. "But he's changed for the worse," he protested.

Sebastian nodded. "And maybe he has. I haven't met him, so I can't truly say. I only know what you tell me." His hand slid from Ciel's hair to cup his cheek. "But there's only so much you can do about that change, Ciel. It's his life and he needs to live with the choices he made."

"But he's my friend," Ciel said and closed his eyes. "I don't want to see him screw up his life."

"No one wants that for their friends," Sebastian murmured. "But there's only so much you can do. You told him how you felt and you brought it to his attention. You tried everything that you could do but it's his choice whether or not he wants to listen to you. If you push too hard, then you risk the chance of losing him as a friend and then you're left with nothing in the end. You can't try to live his life for him or make him live the life you think is best."

Sebastian shook his head and continued. "I know it's hard and it's not what you want, but I think it might be best to take a step back for now." He placed a hand over Ciel's lips, a little off target but it remained effective. "I'm not saying stop being his friend or leave him, just that you need to let him do what he wants. If this is the way he wants to live, you can't do anything about it. He's made his bed, now he has to sleep in it."

Ciel worried his lower lip and squeezed his eyes shut. Sebastian's words were easier said than done. After years of close friendship, he found it hard to step back and simply watch Alois spiral down a path of destruction. It was hard for Ciel to see where Alois was headed and know that he couldn't do anything about it.

It still hurt at the same time and Ciel yearned for his old friend back. He missed _that_ Alois, not the current Alois that probably continued to slumber despite the late hour.

"You make it sound so easy," he whispered.

"I know it's not," Sebastian answered and his fingers started to move through Ciel's hair again. "Things like this will take time. You'll continue to feel frustrated and you'll feel disgusted with things that Alois tells you. But eventually, you'll find that he'll either come around or you'll accept his new lifestyle. Even if you don't want to."

Ciel snorted. "I'll never accept this new Alois."

Sebastian hummed. "Perhaps. But if you don't step back and let him do as he wishes, it'll only make you more miserable. You'll keep holding onto the past and how things once were. That's easy to do. Moving forward though proves a little harder and more challenging."

Ciel didn't answer, turning the words around in his mind and mulling over them. They left a sour taste in his mouth and the mere thought of letting Alois run wild made his stomach churn. But then again, how did that make things any different from how things had gone the past year?

Alois didn't listen to him no matter what he said and even being here didn't make things different. He wasn't going to listen to him and no matter what Ciel said, Alois would just do the opposite. But could he step back and watch his friend possibly ruin his life?

He shook his head. "I don't know if I can do that right away, Sebastian," Ciel said. "I would feel bad. I know I need to help him.

"But he doesn't see it that way," Sebastian reminded him gently. "He doesn't think he needs help and it only frustrates him when you push your help or ideals on him."

Ciel buried his face in Sebastian's stomach and let out a shuddering breath. He didn't know what to do and his head swam with the list of possibilities. Could he even call himself a decent friend if he let Alois ruin himself? Even if Alois didn't seem to believe him and wanted to continue along the path he set before him?

"He's not going to change, is he?" Ciel whispered.

"He might," Sebastian reassured him. "But you have to let him do that on his own. He won't accept your help."

Ciel grumbled and let Sebastian's comforting fingers rub soothing circles in his scalp. He sighed at the gentle touch and tried not to let his mind wander too much. It left him with a headache and his thoughts made him even more frustrated.

Sebastian's fingers stroked down the side of his face. "This bothers you," he said bluntly. "Staying with Alois isn't good for you right now and it's only going to get worse if you keep forcing yourself to stay at his apartment with people you don't like."

"I don't have another choice," Ciel said.

Sebastian made a soft noise and cocked his head. "No?" he questioned. "What about staying with me again?"

Ciel faltered and his shoulders slumped. He wanted to. The whole week he had fought the desire to crawl back to Sebastian's apartment where things were easier and better. He had more fun with Sebastian and the stress that had built up from staying around Alois had quickly slipped away with Sebastian.

He turned his head to the side, ear resting against Sebastian's torso. "I'll bother you," he said.

"That's fine," Sebastian said lightly and Ciel's lips threatened to curl into a smile. "I like it when you bother me. Honestly, Ciel, I wouldn't offer if I truly didn't want you staying with me. And I wasn't lying last night when I said that I missed you. It'll sound acquisitive of me, but I had hoped to spend more time with you before you left."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

Ciel pulled away from Sebastian and sat up. Sebastian made it sound so simple when he said it like that and it helped chase away any guilty feelings Ciel had about wanting to stay. The constant force that pushed him towards Sebastian guided him over the last standing barrier and silently coaxed him to accept Sebastian's offer.

"Well," Ciel started. "I suppose that if you're being greedy, I can be as well." He grinned at Sebastian, unable to keep the happiness from leaking into his voice. This was what he wanted since leaving Sebastian and knowing that Sebastian wanted the same thing as well only strengthened his desire to stay.

He would have to tell Alois, but that could wait. Right now, he just wanted to show his thanks to Sebastian and make up for the time they lost during his absence. And judging by the way Sebastian pulled him closer, he wanted the same thing.

He chuckled as Sebastian's hands searched for his face and Ciel guided the wandering hands to his face. Fingers briefly smoothed over his cheeks before their lips met, closing the remaining distance between them. Bodies pressed together and Ciel moaned into the intimate gesture. Sebastian's hands traced up his shoulders before looping around his neck as their bodies aligned.

Ciel's hips rocked slightly and they both shuddered at the pleasurable feelings that raced through their veins. His thighs trembled as Ciel's mind urged him to do it again, but he fought to keep them still. They had the rest of the summer to enjoy themselves.

The shrill cry of a phone had them both jerking apart and Ciel panted heavily, his pants tighter than he wanted them. Sebastian looked no better, his cheeks flushed and an obvious tent in his pants. Ciel threw him a cheeky grin even though Sebastian couldn't see and he boldly reached out to palm his arousal.

Sebastian hissed and bucked into the touch as the phone rang again. "That's yours," he groaned. Another ring. "Go answer it and then we can continue."

Ciel huffed but stood up to answer the phone. Alois's name appeared on the screen and Ciel felt a brief wave of surprise hit him. "Hello?"

"There you are," Alois said. "Where are you? I couldn't find you anywhere in the apartment complex. We wondered where you had gone off to."

Ciel's eyebrow rose but he didn't question whether Alois's roommates truly cared. "I went to see Sebastian this morning," he said. "I won't lie, Alois, I wasn't having fun at the apartment. In between your friends and all the parties I felt miserable."

Alois made a confused noise. "But we invited you out to all the parties and bars. We even planned on going to the water park."

"You know I'm not a big drinker," Ciel said. "And it's just…I couldn't take staying there another day. Sebastian offered me the chance to stay here for the rest of the summer."

"Are you?" Alois asked.

Ciel ran a hand through his hair and bit his lip. He knew what he wanted but going about and telling Alois wasn't the easiest. They didn't part the other night on good terms and he worried that this wouldn't help matters much between them. But forcing himself to stay hadn't proved productive either and Ciel found himself backed into a corner. No way out promised an easy route.

Finally, he nodded and his hand fell back to his side. "Yeah. I'm sorry Alois, but I really can't stay at your apartment. I can't handle your roommates." He ran a hand through his hair. "And I need some time to think about things. Clear my head, if you will. I can't do that there. But I still want to hang out with you, preferably just you and not your roommates, if you still want to."

Alois grunted. "Does this have to do with how you said I changed?" he demanded.

"A bit."

"I don't know why you keep saying that," Alois growled. "If anything, I think you're the one that changed."

Ciel bit his lip. "Maybe I have. Maybe we both have." He looked at Sebastian. "Look, Alois. I don't want to argue with you. I'm tired of it and I need to go. I'll call you back tonight after we've both calmed down okay?"

"Sure. I'll be here," Alois said before hanging up.

Ciel winced and made his way back to Sebastian, his previous mood quickly slipping through his fingers. "That could've gone better," he said and took a seat next to Sebastian.

"Y'all will figure it out," Sebastian promised and squeezed his hand. "You both want to remain friends. And so long as that common bridge spans between y'all, you can find a way to keep your friendship." Sebastian pressed a chaste kiss to his temple.

"Thanks," Ciel muttered and returned the favor, all the while hoping Sebastian was right.

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

"Hey, Alois," McMillan called as he entered the room, a long neck in his hand. "Find out where your friend ran off to?"

Alois threw himself down on the couch and grabbed a bottle that sat on the coffee table. He took a long swig of it and slammed the glass back on the table. The sound echoed throughout the apartment and for a brief moment, his anger followed it. The emotion rushed back to him the next second and he scowled again.

"Yeah. He went back to see the guy he stayed with before coming here," he said. "Claimed that he had a better time with him and that he wanted to stay there the rest of the time."

Eric winced and patted him on the shoulder. "That's sucks man. Sorry to hear that."

"Yeah," McMillan said.

Alois slumped against the cushions. "He wasn't like this before. I mean, we had our fights before but nothing like this." He drained the rest of his beer and reached for another bottle. "I don't know what his big problem is, but it's like he's not even the same person as before."

He cradled the newest bottle in between his hands and looked at the smooth contours. Ciel's accusations still rang in his ears and Alois ground his teeth together. He didn't understand where Ciel came from, claiming all the things he did. He could understand that Ciel didn't like going out all the time but Alois seriously doubted that he hated staying with him that much that he wanted to leave.

They had planned this trip for months and sure, Alois had messed up a bit. But he made good on his promise to pick Ciel up a month later. That had to count for something. And he tried to show Ciel a good time with everyone, but Ciel didn't seem impressed. He kept complaining about his roommates and Alois couldn't figure out why.

Light blue eyes looked at his three roommates, trying to see what Ciel disliked about them. Alois drew a blank and he took a swig from the bottle. Something had happened to make him change, but Alois just couldn't figure out what. Ciel claimed that Alois had changed - and maybe he had - but the way Alois saw it, Ciel was the one who had changed the most.

Especially after coming down to visit.

He jumped as McMillan slapped him on the back. "He'll come around, Alois," he said. "I mean, where else is he staying that's better than here?" He gestured around the apartment in all its wonder.

Alois grumbled. "The person he's staying with lives in the Arts District." Another drink. "I'm talking like a block away from it and all the amazing night clubs around there. The guy is fucking loaded. It's a nice apartment, I'll give him that."

Edgar whistled. "Wow, he sure picked a lavish place to stay though. I have to give him props there." He laughed and slapped his thigh. "What lady is he fucking to stay there?"

Alois grunted. "It's some guy. A composer I think." He shrugged. "Ciel said he wasn't screwing anyone and he's not the type to do that anyway. He's such a fucking prude."

McMillan perked up. "You said he was a composer?"

"Yeah. Sebastian something, I think." He took another long drink. "I thought it was funny. Cause you know, Sebastian like the crab from that Disney movie."

McMillan leaned forward. "Sebastian Michaelis?" he pressed.

"Sounds right," Alois said and eyed his friend. "Why?"

"Dude, he's a fag!"

Alois jerked back. "Who? Ciel?"

"Nah, the guy he's staying with. Michaelis," McMillan said quickly. "He was in the papers last month. I dated a girl a while back who liked the whole arts scene. She tried to get me to go to one of his shows but once I found out he was a queer, I bailed on her. I don't date chicks that dig guys fucking guys."

Eric murmured his agreement and Alois looked between them quickly. "Ciel isn't like that," he said hurriedly. He knew his friend and Ciel would never do that. "He would never stay with a fag. Ciel must not have known that about him."

McMillan nodded. "Of course not. No one would willingly stay with scum like that. But that explains a lot." He gestured at Alois. "You said you thought Ciel had changed after staying with there. I bet the faggot infected him with his disease. You know that living with one of those freaks will turn you into one. He turned poor Ciel gay and against you. He's probably confused now and needs our help getting back on the right path."

Alois shuddered at the thought. It terrified him to think of Ciel in the clutches of a gay man. Who knew what the queer had done to Ciel during the month he stayed there. And Ciel, unknowing who he stayed with, didn't understand what had happened to him. McMillan was right though, it did explain why Ciel had suddenly changed.

The dates matched all too well and Alois's stomach churned uneasily. He felt bad, knowing that he was partially to blame for leaving Ciel in the hands of a fag, but at the time, they didn't know any better. But now that he knew, Alois remained determined to fix the past mistake and rescue Ciel.

"We have to save him," he said boldly and pumped his fist in the air. "And teach that faggot a lesson he won't forget. Maybe then he'll stop trying to corrupt innocent people with his disease ridden touch."

A chorus of cheers met his proclamation and Edgar grunted. "How do we go about doing that though?

McMillan jumped to his feet. "There's a saying that in order to kill a snake, you have to cut off its head," he sneered. "Maybe not kill the little fucker but we'll teach him a lesson that he won't soon forget. My old man said it's our duty to eradicate the disease that poisons society."

Another round of cheering and Alois clinked his bottle with Eric as they toasted McMillan.

McMillan smirked. "Don't worry Alois, we'll get your friend back and all will be right with the world once more."

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

Fingers brushed across the surface of a white page, the sheet devoid of printed black text. Instead, small bumps rose from the smooth texture of the paper and formed words. To anyone else, they spoke nothing but gibberish – a confusing mix of dots that looked more like a secretive code than actual words.

But Sebastian devoured the dots, reading each word with a hunger as they drew him further into the book. Despite being unable to see, he greatly enjoyed reading and couldn't get enough of the words that spoke to him. His newest book had arrived in the mail two days ago and already, he found himself halfway through the story.

While audio tapes were easier, he still couldn't shake the comforting weight of a book in his hand. Braille was his, something that no one else – bar another blind person – could understand. For once, they could do something that others couldn't. Sebastian felt that it helped lower the bar that society placed on them. He might not be able to drive or do other things, but in return, he could do several other things that most people couldn't do.

Sebastian chuckled as he read a passage and turned the page, the sound loud in the silence of the apartment. Ciel still hadn't returned from his day with Alois but it was only seven at night. The water park that they went to was an all-day affair and it gave Sebastian time to catch up on his reading.

He looked up as Soot bounded into the room, the bell jingling loudly. She jumped onto the couch and Sebastian reached for her. She met him halfway, guiding his hand so he didn't fumble and he rubbed her ears lovingly. "You're quiet today," he said.

Something light dropped onto his book and Sebastian picked it up, the small shape and texture telling him it was a toy. He hummed as Soot voiced her desires to him now that her mouth wasn't full. Her voice didn't pitch, but it sped up and Sebastian could hear the demand in her tone. She remained persistent and Sebastian's lips quirked.

"I spoil you so," he teased her and tossed the toy in the direction of the hallway. He aimed further to the right so that the toy would land away from his piano and computer.

Soot scampered off the couch, bell ringing loudly as she chased after the toy. Claude had always commented that Soot was more dog than cat, but Sebastian enjoyed the small quirks that made up Soot's personality. He found them endearing. How many cats could fetch?

The bell came tingling back and the next second Soot appeared next to him. The toy dropped into his waiting hand and Sebastian laughed as Soot nudged his hand for extra measures. "One of these days we're going to break something," he told her. "I'll either throw your toy at something or you'll crash into something. Wouldn't that make you feel guilty?"

She made an annoyed noise, disgruntled that he hadn't thrown the toy yet. Sebastian clicked his tongue at her and lifted his hand, prepared to throw it. Soot stood up and Sebastian could feel the tension in her legs as she balanced on his thighs. He flicked his wrist, mimicking the motion of throwing something but kept a tight grip on the toy.

Soot remained steady on his legs and gave a protesting cry. Even going so far as to stand on her hind legs and press her paws on his chest in an attempt to get his attention.

"Can't fool you, can I," Sebastian muttered and drew the cat into an embrace. She squirmed against him, too playful to accept his affection and Sebastian laughed. "Very well," he said and tossed the toy once more.

Without a word, she raced off and Sebastian listened to her run down the hall. Her paws remained light on the tile but the noise of the bell gave away almost every action she did. And after years of living with her, Sebastian had memorized nearly every sound that came from the little bell.

The steady but calm tinkle was the most common, as it came from her normal gait. The exuberant beat-pause-beat pattern often came about when they played and Soot raced about the apartment – the bell ringing and falling silent with each bounding step she took. A constant and flurried series of noise meant that Soot had an itch somewhere, and the noise usually came accompanied with a faint scratching of nails against the collar.

But while the bell helped Sebastian hear her and gave away Soot's actions, her voice remained the thing Sebastian understood the most. It varied far more than the bell in pitch, rhythm, and tone. It told Sebastian how she felt and helped him gauge the things around them as well.

Usually, it remained at a steady tone, pitching only a note or two throughout the day depending on what Soot wanted. It varied by the time of day as well and it took Sebastian a while to pick up the different pitches. She had a deeper voice in the morning when they woke up that eventually soothed out to her normal tone by the time they had breakfast. It would typically lower again around evening.

Rarely though did it raise high – or low – enough that it drew Sebastian's concern. When it pitched too low, Sebastian knew Soot was sick or injured, and he hated that voice when it left her. Too high though often meant distress or alarm, such as the time Sebastian once left the stove on.

The bell alerted him to her presence before she landed on the couch next to him and dropped the toy in his lap. She gave a proud mewl, and Sebastian didn't need to see to know that she probably held her head high. "Such a smart girl," he teased and closed his book. "I'm not getting any more reading down for a while, am I?"

Soot purred loudly and mewled at the same time, the action making a vibrating sort of cry. He shook his head and tossed the toy again, listening to the cat bound away.

He had once tried to write a composition based off her daily actions. The notes bounced almost randomly across the page, starting quiet then flourishing with energy before calming once more. Like a wave, the notes rolled across the page. They pitched high and filled with energy at the peaks of Soot's daily activities, and slowed to a loll when she napped in his lap.

The composition never reached the public though. Instead, it remained in Sebastian's private collection, as it remained a song and story of his life with Soot. Something he wasn't quite ready to allow others to hear.

Soot had stayed by his side since he first adopted her as a tiny kitten. She didn't judge him when they first met and she remained a constant companion through the vicissitudes of his life. She was the first to comfort him when Johan left and when his mother passed away. To Soot, he was normal and she loved him no matter what.

Despite Claude's patience and understanding with him, Sebastian knew there were times when he frustrated his friend. They couldn't do certain things and at times, Sebastian's blindness turned into a hindrance when they planned things. Claude would never blame him and didn't hold anything against him, but Sebastian could still hear his voice tightening when he grew annoyed on account of his blindness.

It left Sebastian feeling guilty, even though Claude tried his best to reassure him. Because although Sebastian couldn't help the fact that he couldn't see, he was still inadvertently the cause behind the whole problem.

With Soot though, he couldn't exactly let her down the way he could with Claude. His blindness didn't inconvenience her. Sebastian could take care of Soot just as well as a sightseeing person could. Whether she knew or not that he couldn't see, Sebastian didn't know. He suspected that she knew but it didn't stop her from loving him any less. Love without conditions, it was the purest form Sebastian could think of.

She came racing back, her voice mixing in with the frantic sound of her bell. It rang faster than the normal beat-pause-beat and Sebastian grunted as she launched herself into his lap. "What's with you?" he asked and traced his hands over her body.

His fingers felt her muscles, tense and quivering, while her tail stood straight in the air. Ears swiveled, flicking forward to him and back from the direction where she came from. Her voice continued to pitch, her mewls growing higher and constant; each one escaping her throat as quickly as possible.

It put Sebastian on edge and he hissed as her teeth nipped at his wrist in a further attempt to get his attention. "I'm listening," he told her and as she completed a small circle on his lap. He reached forward and cupped her head in his hands in an attempt to silence her. "Hush, Soot," he murmured and drew her close to his chest to muffle her cries.

Soot squirmed and her ears pressed flat against her head, but her cries quieted. Sebastian ran a soothing hand over her body as his ears strained to hear anything in the silence of the apartment.

The fast rush of his heart met his ears first and Sebastian continued, moving throughout the apartment in his mind. The AC had just kicked off, the vents still quivering with leftover air and the traffic outside had quieted. It was a Friday night and most people were hitting up the night activities further down the block.

His eyebrows furrowed as loud, obnoxious laughter seemed to grow closer. The sound usually didn't bother him but instead of growing loud and then fading as sounds normal did outside his apartment, the noise continued to crescendo.

He held still a moment longer, hoping that the voices would eventually fade as they usually did. However, they only grew closer. Close enough that Sebastian could make out a few words through the front door. But he only needed to hear those few words and they were enough to make his blood run cold.

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

Claude's tongue poked through the corner of his mouth as he typed a report. His stomach growled and he looked up at the clock, wondering why it was taking Ronald so long to get their dinner. He silently swore under his breath. If Ron had stopped to flirt again, he would kill the brat. Although maybe he should dump all their late reports on him and then do away with Ron.

He chuckled at the thought and paused to take a drink from his mug. He set it down just as the phone went off and Sebastian's name appeared on the screen.

"Claude Faustus speaking," he said, trying his best to mimic someone on a help line. "How may I help you this fine evening, Sebastian? I'm not playing delivery boy again. You promised we were even," he teased.

"Claude," Sebastian said seriously and quietly. The usual tenor sounded strained and Claude could detect the faintest of quivers in Sebastian's voice. The smile on Claude's face instantly slipped away and he gripped the phone tighter, every sense on alert. "Someone is trying to break into my apartment."

Claude was on his feet immediately, his hand grabbing for his keys. "Is anyone with you? Ciel?" he asked and raced out the door.

"No one, just Soot," Sebastian answered and Claude ran faster. "Ciel went out with a friend today and Mey-rin is at a convention."

In the background, Soot cried next to the speaker on the phone and Claude could hear the fine tremble in Sebastian's voice as he told her to stay. Fabric shifted and the mewls vanished, leaving him alone with Sebastian on the phone. Claude mentally traced the layout of Sebastian's apartment and the nearby areas.

"Where are they coming in?" he questioned and yanked open the door to his cruiser.

"The front," Sebastian said.

A curse fell from his mouth as the car started. He had hoped they would try the back and Sebastian could escape through the front door. While Sebastian had a porch in the back, it led to a back alleyway that had too many hazards for Sebastian to navigate around in a hurry. Cars came and went, parking there during the night and many people stored their trash bins there until pick up day. With the constant flux, Sebastian could never know what was where.

The siren blared overhead as Claude peeled around a corner. "Can you hide anywhere?"

"They'll find me," Sebastian said plainly, his voice tight with worry and laced with fear despite the simplicity of his answer.

Claude swore again. "Just hold on, Sebastian," he said and pressed harder against the gas. "I'm on my way and I'm radioing for backup now."

Sebastian didn't say anything but Claude could hear him set the phone down and he shouted at Sebastian to pick it up again. Nothing came through the speakers and Claude turned the volume up as loud as he could, straining to hear anything over the speakers. He set the phone in his lap and reached for his radio, quickly reporting the break in and requesting backup.

He could only hope that if he couldn't make it there first, that someone else did.

Static erupted over the speakers on his phone and Claude scrambled for the device. "Sebastian!" he shouted before muffled and broken words filtered through.

"Hello little faggot."

"Come out, come out, where ever you are~"

Claude's heart skipped a beat and for a minute, the world around him pitched until all he could hear was a loud whine in his ears. His hands trembled and he shook his head harshly, forcing himself to focus. Claude always secretly feared that one day Sebastian would be subject to a hate crime. He was gay and blind, a combination that made him a perfect target to those less accepting.

And now one of his biggest fears had happened. Claude ground his teeth together. If he felt this worried for Sebastian, Claude could only imagine the fear Sebastian felt.

He forced himself to listen, mentally counting how many different voices he heard. So far, he counted at least two and he hoped the numbers wouldn't increase.

He jumped as something loud clanged through the speakers, followed by a loud howl of pain and curses.

"Fuck, I think he broke my nose!" someone shouted and Claude grinned despite himself. Sebastian wasn't as weak as most people took him for.

"Take them down, Sebastian," he muttered, the siren still screaming overhead. Backup had yet to respond to the apartment but he had several other officers headed to the area.

The person continued to groan and Claude heard something metallic hit against something hard. It sounded as though Sebastian had missed and the grin slipped from his face as bodies fell to the floor. They landed with a loud and thick thump, making Claude wince. If he had to guess, someone had tackled Sebastian to the ground.

More shouts filled the air and a struggling fight ensued. Fists met flesh and Claude cringed at each one. He didn't know which ones belonged to Sebastian and which belonged to the perpetrators. He could only hope that Sebastian would come out on top.

Silence settled over the speakers and Claude strained to hear anything. Faint struggles, the sound of rustling clothes and quiet grunts, reached his ears and Claude's heart sank. They must've had Sebastian pinned. He pushed harder on the gas pedal.

"Holy…," the speaker trailed off. "McMillan, he's blind! Alois didn't mention that."

Another voice – probably McMillan, Claude's mind supplied - grunted. "He's probably blind 'cause he's a queer. Serves him right." A kick and Sebastian hissed in pain. "You think you're so fucking smart, huh. Trying to defend yourself against us when you have no right to fight back at all. Who do you think you are? You're nothing but a faggot."

"What did I do to you?" Sebastian snapped and Claude could hear him struggling to get free.

A sickening punch had Sebastian shouting in pain. "You corrupted one of our roommate's friends. You touched him with your filthy hands and passed your disease to him as well." McMillan snarled. "Did you think we would just take that sitting down? Huh?! People like you disgust me. No, wait; you're not even a person. You're lower than that. You're a fag. A burden to the rest of us normal people who are just trying to live our lives without foul beasts like you polluting the air."

Sebastian spit at him, the action earning him another punch. "Why don't you blame the hole in the ozone and global warming on us as well," he snarled. "And maybe the extinction of the dinosaurs while you're at it."

One of them swore and Sebastian choked on his breath before screaming in pain. "I don't think you've learned your place just yet."

"And where's that?" Sebastian asked sarcastically.

"Beneath my foot," McMillan answered. "Allow me to give you a taste of your punishment. Maybe this will teach you to keep your disease ridden self from the rest of us normal people."

Claude winced and his stomach churned with each pained cry that left Sebastian's mouth following a cruel blow. He still had a few more miles to go and the late, heavy night traffic didn't help matters. Several times already, Claude had resorted to driving on the shoulder and he knew traffic elsewhere around the city wasn't any better.

But hearing Sebastian's hoarse voice only made the miles seem longer and his chest filled with helplessness. His best friend needed him now and the only thing Claude could do was listen to his suffering and scream at the bastards who harmed him. It was enough to make him sick and Claude struggled to keep his stomach from violently expelling its contents.

The noises faded and Claude forced himself to breathe again, blinking back frustrated tears that had started to form at the corners of his eyes. He begged Sebastian to hold on for five more minutes.

The speakers crackled to life again with a cruel laugh. "Hey, he's a composer. I bet his ears are _real_ important," McMillan jeered. "I say we teach the little faggot a permanent lesson so he never thinks about spreading his sickness to others. I think we should make him deaf as well as blind. I think that's a finishing punishment for being a fag."

The other people voiced their agreement. "Hold the little pillow biter down, Eric."

A brief shuffle sounded over the phone that Claude could barely hear over the pounding in his ears. Sebastian struggled and then cried out, gagging as someone shoved their fist into his stomach. "Now what?"

"Check the laundry room for ammonia or bleach. I bet if we pour that in his ears, it'll ruin his eardrums." Laughter.

"Don't!" Sebastian shouted, voice laced with pure fear and he seemed to redouble his efforts to escape. "Don't you fucking touch me."

More laughter. "You hear that? The fucktard doesn't want us to hurt him." Another punch. "Too bad, queer. Maybe you should've thought about the consequences before you started going around corrupting people. Hold him tighter."

"Careful McMillan, he might like that," someone said, crowing with laughter. "My old man told me that fags will suck any dick offered to them. That's why it's not considered rape to a fag. They secretly enjoy it."

Sebastian snarled. "I'll bite your cock off if you bring it anywhere near my mouth," he spat.

They ignored Sebastian. "Did you find it?"

"Yeah. Hold his head."

Claude pressed harder on the gas pedal. Almost there.

Sebastian shouted in the background, the noise almost drowned out by the cheering and other slurs that filled the air. Claude rounded another corner, laying on his horn when a car didn't move out of his way quick enough. He struggled to hear something over the rushing of blood in his ears and vaguely heard someone shout to get a funnel.

A steady chant of 'do it, do it, do it!' grew louder and Claude imagined that the background noise was Sebastian fighting them and not him crying. His breath caught as a brief moment of silence settled over the phone and throughout the apartment. Followed by the most chilling and blood-curdling scream Claude had ever heard.

* * *

**A/N**: Apologies again for the strong language, violence, and slurs in this chapter. Trust me when I say I took no pleasure at all in writing them. I wanted to glaze over it but the truth of the matter is things like this happen - people are assaulted, bullied, discriminated against, or harassed simply because of their sexual orientation. Glazing over it doesn't help raise awareness. It only leads us to turn a blind eye to it and pretend it's not that bad.

So I'm biting the bullet and refusing to sugar coat things. These things happen and I feel it's up to us - our generation, which ever you may be - to do something about this. Whether it's putting our foot down against acts such as this or finding a way to help those suffering. Until then, people will continue to tell themselves that it's not a big deal. A single voice can make a lot of noise if it wants to be heard and people will stop to listen but only for a fleeting second. A group of voices though stand together and they'll demand attention. Speak up for those who are victims, those who may become one, and those who currently suffer. Help give them a louder voice.


	12. Opus 12

**A/N**: Everyone, thank you so much for your support and responses last chapter. It truly means a lot and I'm grateful to have such wonderful readers ^^ With that said, onto the next chapter! I hope y'all enjoy it. And as a side note, I have exactly one month until I return home! ^^

Many, many thanks to **socialbutrfly1379 **for being my amazing beta again! She was awesome working on this story :3

**Warnings**: Language**  
**

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Kuroshitsuji

* * *

Ciel licked a dollop of pizza sauce off his fingers and then wiped his fingers with a greasy napkin. "You know, I didn't think you would ever agree to order take out," he said and took another bite of pizza.

Sebastian shrugged. "I wasn't in the mood for leftovers and I believe you called me a lazy ass this morning, so I wanted to hold up to that reputation." He pushed Soot away with his foot as she insistently cried at his feet. "No pepperoni for you."

She growled and nipped his ankles, making Ciel chuckle. "I don't think she liked that answer. This is what happens when you spoil her too much."

"She'll live," Sebastian answered and in a display that surprised Ciel, rubbed her head with the sole of his foot.

He burst out laughing. "You look like a monkey when you do that," he said and gasped for breath. "People shouldn't have that kind of dexterity with their feet."

Sebastian looked smug. "I'm just talented that way."

"Talented like a monkey," Ciel muttered and popped the last of his crust into his mouth.

"Monkeys are smart," Sebastian countered as Soot bounded away, clearly annoyed that she wasn't going to get any table scraps.

Ciel grunted but didn't say anything as he reached for another piece of pizza. It wasn't quite as good as some of the meals Sebastian had cooked but he couldn't deny that a little take out wasn't bad every now and then.

The news played quietly in the background, filling in the silence that settled between them while they ate. The anchor continued to read the daily news, talking about things that Ciel couldn't quite bring himself to care about. The only thing he wanted to hear was the weather so they could plan what they would do tomorrow.

He had a feeling that Alois wouldn't want to do anything tomorrow. Not after the abrupt dismissal he gave Ciel over the phone earlier that day. Still, Ciel would give Alois a call after dinner and see how things were.

"You know," he said after finishing off the piece. "We haven't gone to the Galleria together. Would you want to go sometime next week?"

Sebastian wiped his fingers as he nodded. "That sounds good," he said and stood up, collecting his plate. "I haven't been in a while and it'll be less crowded during a weekday. Makes it easier for me to walk around."

Ciel plucked his last piece from the box. "Great. And we still need to rope Claude into taking us to that breakfast place I told you about the other day." He snickered. "Do you have anything else over him?"

Sebastian chuckled. "I believe I've used up all my favors," he said. "But I can always call a car service for us and they'll come pick us up. I do feel bad about bothering Claude all the time with asking for a ride. I try to use him only as a last resort."

"I don't think he minds all that much," Ciel said as he brought the box into the kitchen. He dug around one of the cabinets for a container to put the leftover pizza in. "He was in a cheerful mood this morning, considering the hour. I think he's trying to make a new acronym. Has he told you about that TGIFT one?"

Crimson eyes rolled. "Unfortunately, yes. I think Ronald killed some of his brain cells. Stupidity is contagious at times."

Ciel laughed. "Yeah, I would believe that." He moved around Sebastian, placing the leftovers in the refrigerator before grabbing his phone. "I'm going to call Alois real quick."

Sebastian waved a hand. "Sure, leave me with washing the dishes."

"Of course," Ciel teased and slipped out of the kitchen.

He made his way up to the loft for a little more privacy and took a seat in the overstuffed chair. As the phone rang, Ciel wondered if Alois would even answer. With the early evening hour, he wouldn't be surprised if Alois had already left to hit the bar. Another ring and Ciel almost hung up just as Alois answered the phone.

"Sorry," Alois puffed. "I was in the living room. I didn't hear it ring at first. The guys were playing some video games."

Ciel slipped lower on the chair. "It's okay."

"What's up?" Alois pressed.

"I told you I would call you back so we could talk," Ciel said carefully. He didn't want to start another disagreement with Alois.

Alois laughed lightly. "Ah, no worries, everything is cool. Really," he said. His tone sounded light and airy. "But hey, I was wondering if you still wanted to go to the water park I mentioned earlier? Just you and me."

Ciel's eyes narrowed and he couldn't help but question it. "Just you and me?" he questioned. "I thought you wanted your roommates to come as well?"

"Well, like you said, I can go with them any time," Alois stated. "You're not going to be down here much longer and I still want to do things with you. We planned all these things. It'd be a shame if we didn't get a chance to do any of them just because we disagree on a few things."

"Yeah," Ciel agreed. "I am sorry that I couldn't stay like we originally planned."

Alois hummed. "It's fine. I think it works out better this way?" Ciel couldn't disagree there. "So about tomorrow. I can come pick you up around nine-thirty. It's a pretty big place so we'll probably stay the whole day and then get dinner before heading back. How's that sound?"

Ciel closed his eyes. "I like it," he said honestly. "My trunks are still at your place though along with my bags. You'll have to bring them tomorrow."

"I'll find them," Alois said. "So tomorrow, nine-thirty?"

"Yep," Ciel answered. "I'll see you then."

Alois gave an affirmative answer and Ciel ended the call. He headed back downstairs and found Sebastian sitting in the living room. Jeopardy played on the television and Sebastian called an answer to the screen.

"What is Weston College," he said and the person on screen mimicked him.

Ciel's eyebrow arched, surprised that Sebastian answered correctly. "That's pretty good," he said. "I'm horrible at that game."

Sebastian cocked his head. "It depends on the categories," he said. "If it involves history, I'm usually okay. I enjoyed history as a child. I was a bit of an odd ball."

Ciel laughed quietly. "You still are," he teased and sat down next to him. "I was too. I really liked math. Still do actually. It's why I got into engineering."

"And I applaud you for that," Sebastian said. "You'll go far with that."

"Flatterer," Ciel muttered but leaned over and gave him a kiss regardless. With Alois seemingly all right with everything and Ciel comfortably curled up next to Sebastian, everything felt right with the world once more.

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

Hot steam rose from the cup of tea and Ciel blew on the scalding liquid. His lips touched the tea but he pulled it away at the hot touch and set the cup back on the table. Fingers drummed against the surface of the table and Ciel glanced at the clock again, the fifth time in a minute. The clock hadn't changed and Ciel pushed away from the table with an irritated sigh.

"If this bothers you so much, I don't know why you agreed to go," Sebastian said from the laundry room.

Ciel stood up and wandered into the room. He leaned against the doorframe, watching as Sebastian skillfully separated the clothes into the washer. He wondered if Sebastian had ever thrown something white into the colors by mistake. Granted, Ciel had done that several times himself. It was why he preferred to wait until he went home to do laundry.

At least then, his mother could do it for him.

Sebastian closed the washer door and hefted the basket to the top of the machine. "Well?" he prompted as his fingers brushed over the bottles and boxes in the cabinets above the washer. He selected one and pulled it down.

"I still want to do things with him," Ciel said as Sebastian poured the proper amount of detergent into the slot. "And I did want to go to the water park when he mentioned it the other day. I just didn't want to go with his roommates."

"And now they're not going?"

Ciel nodded as they left the laundry room. "Yeah. I guess he feels a bit bad that I had such a cruddy time with him and he's trying to make things a bit better." He shrugged. "I think this works out better for everyone though. Alois and I still get to see each other and at the same time, we get to hang out with the other people we want to see as well."

Sebastian hummed as he took a seat at his desk and Ciel perched on the piano bench next to him. "Maybe he didn't realize how badly you felt before and all it took was you bringing it to his attention," he said. "Perhaps things will start to work out for y'all."

"Hopefully," Ciel muttered. "I'm glad though that we can still spend time together and he didn't sound too mad last night. At least he understood that when we spend time together, I want it to be with just him. I truly can't stand his roommates."

A low chuckle left Sebastian's mouth. "When is he coming over?"

Ciel peered around Sebastian to look at the clock on the computer. "He said he would be here around nine-thirty. That gets us there by ten, a little after the park opens." He leaned back. "I think we're going out to eat before we come back too, so I probably won't return until later tonight."

"That's fine," Sebastian said. "Just give me a call if you're going to come back later than eleven. And don't forget to pick up your things before you come back too."

"Will do," Ciel stated. "And thanks for the reminder."

Sebastian nodded as he brought up a program on the computer. A blank staff filled the screen and Ciel waited impatiently for Sebastian to do something with it. He hadn't seen Sebastian compose anything yet and after hearing a composition last month, Ciel wanted to see him actually write the notes.

He wanted to see the way the notes came to life under Sebastian's careful and steady hand. The way he breathed life into them and gave them wings that enabled them to fly from the page and soar through the air. He wanted to see the skilled fingers that created the melody that could carry Ciel away from this world and to one of his own choosing.

A thin smirk appeared on Sebastian's lips and Ciel shoved his shoulder, knowing that he was teasing him now. "Come on," he almost begged.

"Things like this take time," Sebastian said and the faintest hint of red touched his cheeks. "Especially knowing that you're watching. I want to create something amazing. Something that will steal your breath and soul away."

Ciel hummed. "Trying to live up to your reputation?" he teased and shifted closer to Sebastian. "Although, I know a better way you can steal my breath away."

Judging by the amused smile that flickered across Sebastian's face, he knew exactly what was on Ciel's mind. "Do tell," he goaded.

"How about I show you," Ciel muttered and captured Sebastian's smug lips in a rough kiss. Their teeth clicked together and Sebastian's tongue flicked out to trace the seam of his lips. Ciel pulled away at the touch, drawing an aggravated noise from Sebastian. "Nope. Not until you compose something for me," he teased.

Sebastian snorted. "I'm starting to think you're taking lessons from Soot," he said.

Ciel stood up and placed a chaste kiss on Sebastian's temple. "Good thing you love us both so much," he said and walked into the kitchen. His cup of tea had cooled off considerably and Ciel grimaced at the lukewarm temperature. He took another sip as he looked at the clock, noting that Alois would come soon.

No sooner had the thought crossed his mind did the doorbell ring and Ciel drained the rest of the tea. He walked through the kitchen and towards the front door, unsurprised to find Alois standing on the other side when he opened it.

"Sorry, there was a bit of traffic," Alois said and shifted on his feet. He stood near the railing of the front porch, not quite touching the metal but not daring to get any closer to the door.

"Everything all right?" Ciel asked at the strange behavior.

Alois nodded. "Yeah, just excited to go." His eyes flickered briefly towards the interior of the apartment. "Are you ready?"

Ciel glanced over his shoulder. "Let me tell Sebastian I'm leaving and grab my bag. Then we can go."

"I'll go wait in the car," Alois said and scurried down the steps.

Ciel turned from the entryway. "That was Alois," he said as he walked down the hallway. Sebastian gave him an 'I figured as much' look and Ciel shook his head. "Don't give me that look. We don't all have amazing superpowers like you," he teased.

Sebastian laughed. "Have fun," he said and reached for Ciel. "I'll collect on that kiss tonight," he murmured, voice low and husky.

"I look forward to it," Ciel answered and let Sebastian pull him into another kiss, giving them each something to tie them over until then. His body arched into Sebastian's touch as his fingers skimmed across the sensitive spots on his body, playing him like an instrument. He forced himself to step back before they lost themselves to the budding lust. "I should get going. Alois is waiting in the car."

A low hum and Sebastian nipped his lip. "Very well. I suppose I can let you go," he teased. "Have a good time."

Ciel chuckled and removed himself fully from Sebastian's embrace. "Have a good day too." He nearly tripped over Soot as he backed away, the animal watching them from behind with large, curious eyes. She mewled at him as he collected his bag and Ciel patted her on the head before making his way to the front.

Hot air surrounded him as he stepped outside. Ciel grimaced at the temperature as he closed the door behind him and hurried to the car. He gave Alois an apologetic smile and hoped he didn't look too flustered.

The car moved away from the curb and Ciel relaxed in the seat, comfortable and content to spend a day with just Alois. It was what he had wanted all along and he hoped that today would feel like old times.

"Did you have any problems finding my trunks?" he asked.

"Nah," Alois said and waved a hand to the back seat. "They're in the bag back there along with a few towels. I'm telling you Ciel, this water park is the best in the world."

Ciel rolled his eyes. "You're just saying that."

"Nah-uh. It's won several awards in the past years for the best water park," Alois defended. "It's just that great. You almost have to spend two whole days there just to see everything."

"Sounds impressive," Ciel said honestly. He had heard mentions of the water park once or twice online, but he had never bothered to look it up. He would have to take Alois's word for it.

They continued to drive, leaving the city further behind and heading further south. It wasn't long before the tall gleaming buildings were nothing but distant shadows on the horizon and a long stretch of road surrounded them. The land spread out, large and flat with random trees littering the tan grass. It reminded Ciel of a prairie and he wondered if they would see any horses on their way to the park.

His mind drifted as they continued to drive, Alois singing off key to the song on the radio. He wondered if Sebastian could go to a water park or if Sebastian even knew how to swim. Ciel never thought to ask and he promised himself to ask when he came back tonight. If the park was as fun as Alois claimed it was, perhaps they could go together.

Sebastian didn't seem to have any trouble at the small amusement park they went to last month. Although an amusement park greatly differed from a water park. Ciel assumed that Sebastian knew how to swim but it never crossed his mind to ask. And Ciel firmly convinced himself that he wanted to take Sebastian to the water park to have fun, not just to see him in his trunks.

Even though the mental image wasn't a bad one.

He shook his head and focused on the scenery again. Small houses dotted the landscape and Ciel turned to look at Alois. "Is this place out in the middle of nowhere?"

"Nah, it's just tucked away from the main road," Alois said. His eyes darted to the clock. "You'll probably see the sign for it in a few minutes. We could've taken the main highway to get there but it would've taken longer."

Ciel shrugged. "You know best," he said. He had no idea where they were and had to trust that Alois knew where he was going.

Alois shoved his shoulder playfully. "And don't you forget it," he stated.

"Uh-huh. Says the guy who got his tongue stuck to a cold pole not twice, but three times," Ciel drawled and grinned at Alois. "You think you would've learned after the second time at least."

"But it wasn't that cold," Alois protested. "That last one shouldn't have counted. How was I to know that it was below zero that day?"

Ciel stared at him in disbelief but a grin still tugged at his lips. "Maybe the fact that you could see your breath that morning?" he teased. "I swear your mom must've kept a bucket of water handy every winter in case you wanted to try again."

Alois snorted but didn't deny it. "Well, at last it doesn't get that cold here," he said but a faint hint of red touched his cheeks.

Laughter left Ciel's mouth. "Don't tell me, you tried it again down here."

"I had to!" Alois said after a few minutes of silence in which Ciel wouldn't stop staring at him, silently pushing for an answer. "I thought maybe because I was further south, it wouldn't matter as much."

Ciel howled with laughter and Alois smacked him on the shoulder, trying to get him to stop laughing. "I can't believe you," he gasped. "Your mom will never let you live that down."

Alois grumbled as he turned off the main road and the car bounced along. "Yeah, yeah, and I'm sure you won't either."

He shook his head, small chortles escaping on occasion. Somehow, that shouldn't have surprised him but it still did. At least there were some parts about Alois that hadn't changed.

"Laugh it up, Ciel. You forget that I was there that one time you laughed so hard that you pissed yourself," Alois stated and Ciel's laughter faded. "Yeah, that's what I thought."

Ciel huffed but didn't say anything as the car pulled into a large parking lot. He had forgotten about that little incident. He pushed the thought to the back of his mind as the car came to a stop and glanced out the window. Several rides caught his eyes as they stood tall and spanned long throughout the park.

"What do you think?" Alois asked as they climbed out of the car.

Ciel grinned, feeling like everything was back to normal and he had his old friend back. "It looks awesome," he said.

Today was going to be a good day.

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

"I don't think I could eat another bite," Ciel said as he leaned back in the booth and groaned as the waiter took his plate away.

Alois chuckled but pushed his plate away as well. "Do you have a food baby?" he teased.

Ciel frowned. "Probably," he moaned and brought his arms up to stretch over his head. "But it was so good. And it hit the spot after running around the park today for hours."

They had stayed at the park until closing and they still had rides that they hadn't been on. It gave them incentive to go back though and now more than ever, Ciel truly wanted to take Sebastian.

His eyes darted to Alois as his phone rang and Alois fished the device out of his pocket. Light blue eyes glanced at the screen and Alois hummed. "I need to take this real quick. I'll be right back."

Ciel nodded as Alois slid out from the booth and vanished around the corner to take the call. He relaxed against the seat again and drew his finger through a water ring, idly smearing the liquid around. They still had to go back to the apartment and pick up his things but that wouldn't take too long. He just had to find a good way to remind Alois without ruining their day.

Despite their day though, Ciel stayed firm to his decision to stay with Sebastian for the rest of the summer. The only time Ciel could enjoy Alois's company was when they were away from his roommates. And even then, there were times when Alois made a quip that rubbed Ciel the wrong way.

He could handle it in small doses, but having to put up with the barbs constantly would quickly grate on Ciel's nerves.

Fingers drummed against the table and Ciel paused to flick away a wrapper from the straw. He shifted in the booth, feeling a touch of anxiety brush across his nerves. He couldn't place the feeling but it left him unnerved and Ciel looked around the restaurant for Alois. A bob of blond hair caught his attention and Ciel watched it weave throughout the tables before Alois finally came into view.

"Everything all right?" Ciel asked, gesturing to the phone.

Alois glanced at it and a smug smile crossed his face as he pocketed it. "Yeah. I just asked one of the guys to keep me updated on a game they had planned on playing." He shrugged. "That was McMillan telling me that they had started."

Ciel made a 'ah' noise and watched Alois shove his hands in his pockets. "I'm guessing you need to get back then?"

"Eh, not really," Alois said as he picked up his bill. "They're not at the apartment."

"We should go get my things then," Ciel said quickly. If he could get his bags without running into Alois's roommates, he would consider today a success. Not only did he have a good time with Alois, but he also didn't have to bother himself with Alois's roommates.

Alois nodded and they made their way to the register. "That works for me. Their game won't take that long and by the time I drop you off, they'll probably be back." He handed the cashier his bill.

Ciel dug out his wallet. "Sounds like a short game," he said and moved forward to pay his bill. "What game are they playing?"

"Revenge," Alois answered simply.

Ciel's eyebrows furrowed at the word but he didn't push Alois for an answer. He decided that he really didn't want to know and figured that the game had something to do drinking and stupidity. He grunted and accepted his change. "I'm ready."

They went out to the car and climbed in. The sun had just started to set and Ciel looked at the clock. It was around eight-thirty and he dialed a familiar number as Alois started to drive. The call went straight to voicemail and he frowned before leaving a quick message. Alois didn't say anything as he hung up and Ciel turned his attention to the passing cars.

The silence between them felt slightly awkward but Ciel couldn't place the reason for it. Looking at Alois from the corner of his eye, it almost looked as though his friend wanted to say something but struggled to find the words. Ciel wondered if he was just anxious to get back to his friends so he could partake in whatever game they played.

Finally, Alois shifted and reached out to turn the radio off, drawing Ciel's attention. Without the faint murmur of music, the silence grew and mounted, pressing against Ciel and threatening to suffocate him.

"Are you sure you want to stay there for the rest of the summer?" Alois finally asked, his soft words shattering the quiet like a gunshot.

Ciel looked at him, trying to judge Alois's attitude before speaking. "I think it would be for the best," he said carefully. "We can still spend time with each other and our other friends. And this way, if you go out with your friends, I don't have to stay at your apartment feeling irritated."

Alois made a displeased noise. "If you say so, I suppose. It's just, how can you trust that guy when you barely know him?" His fingers tightened briefly on the wheel and then relaxed. "I mean, you can't know that much about a person in a month."

"I trust him," Ciel said softly. "He's been nothing but nice to me since I arrived at his place. And I know some things about him, so it's not like we're completely strangers." He didn't add that he knew more about Sebastian than he let on. Alois didn't need to know that.

"I guess," Alois muttered as he pulled into the apartment complex. "If you ever change your mind though, you know I'm only a phone call away. You can still stay with me if you want."

Ciel smiled and hoped it didn't look strained. "Thanks. I'll keep that in mind," he said, even though he doubted he would take Alois up on his offer.

They didn't say anymore as they entered the apartment and Ciel made a beeline for Alois's room. He wanted to grab his things and get back to Sebastian's place as quickly as possible. He felt bad for turning down Alois's offer yet again and he couldn't help but feel that Alois held some animosity towards him for that.

He shoved his clothes and toiletries into his bag, disregarding how sloppy everything looked. He could repack and refold when he arrived back at Sebastian's apartment. Alois's presence hovered over him, even though Alois had remained in the kitchen. Ciel could feel it surrounding him in the bedroom as he hurriedly packed and with each passing minute, it only seemed to grow.

With the last of his things packed away, Ciel rolled the suitcase into the hallway and looked at Alois. He didn't need to say anything and Alois didn't question him. Instead, Alois simply nodded his head and led the way out of the apartment once more. Silently, they loaded the bags into the car and climbed inside once more.

It all felt stiff and methodical, and for a moment, Ciel wondered if this was the right choice. He shook his head, knowing that he couldn't start doubting himself now. He knew it was for the best that they did this. Eventually, Alois would realize it too.

They left the parking lot and Alois turned the radio on again as they approached the crowded highway. They both groaned at the heavy traffic and without thinking, Ciel reached over to punch Alois lightly on the shoulder.

Alois looked at his shoulder and then to him. "What was that for?"

Ciel pointed. "Punch buggy," he said.

Alois grinned at him. "Ah, so that's how we're going to do this," he said as they merged with traffic. "At least it'll keep things interesting. I have a feeling it'll take us a while to get there."

Looking at the cars that surrounded them, Ciel didn't doubt that. But at least they had an old game to keep them occupied while they waited. They played it often during long car trips when they were younger. Playing it now seemed to help dispense the tension that had previously surrounded them and Ciel hoped it would stay away for the remainder of the drive.

Minutes stretched by and the sun had already set by the time they made their way back to the Arts District. Despite the late hour, traffic remained congested throughout the stretch of highway and Ciel struggled to keep his eyes open. The sun had sucked the energy from his body and after the heavy dinner they had not too long ago, he wanted nothing more than to pass out in bed. They had stopped playing their game several minutes back, finding that the slow moving traffic made it hard to play.

"I'm sleeping in tomorrow," he groaned after his head jerked forward again and Alois snickered at him. "You can't tell me you're not tired."

"I'm getting there," Alois stated. "But I'm sure I'll crash the moment I get to bed."

Ciel nodded as an ambulance raced by them, sirens blaring and lights flashing brightly in the darkened night. He winced at the intense lights and closed his eyes until the screaming sirens faded. At least the ambulance would make it somewhere compared to the slow crawl they found themselves trapped in. Blue eyes opened and flickered to the clock on the dashboard. He still had time before he would have to call Sebastian.

Luckily, they didn't have much further to go and Ciel kept an eye open for the exit they needed. He hoped they wouldn't get back too late. Despite feeling tired, he still wanted to stay up and talk with Sebastian before they went to bed. More than that, he wanted to see if Sebastian had composed anything during the day.

"Ah, there's the exit," Alois muttered. "Finally."

Ciel voiced his agreement as the car slowly made its way to the exit ramp. He nearly cheered as they left the heavy traffic behind and picked up speed down the ramp. The streets leading to the Arts District weren't as crowded and they could at least drive the speed limit.

It seemed to put Alois in a better mood, his fingers tapping merrily against the steering wheel as he hummed a tune that Ciel couldn't place. It made Ciel smile, happy to see Alois looking and acting like himself after the awkwardness at the apartment. Today had been the best time he had spent with Alois since he left for college and Ciel hoped it would continue.

Perhaps not every day but at least once or twice a week during his visit would satisfy his desire to see Alois. Nodding to himself, Ciel looked out the window. He felt that they had made a great deal of progress today and the feeling left him giddy. Maybe Sebastian was right. All they needed was some time and eventually everything would come around.

Sebastian though would never let him live it down if Ciel told him he was right.

They turned down another street, Alois carefully navigating the winding streets. He cursed when he missed his turn and had to drive three more blocks before he could make a proper turn around.

"This place is so confusing when it's dark," he said and shook his head.

"Sorry about this," Ciel said as they made their way back to the proper street.

Alois waved his hand. "It's cool. At least I'm getting to see more of the district at night." He paused. "Plus, I had a good time today. Getting a little lost isn't going to ruin my day."

Ciel beamed, pleased to hear Alois admit that he had a good time. "I had a good time too," he said. "We should do something like that again."

"Yeah!" Alois said and they turned down the right street. "Just give me a call tomorrow or so and we'll figure something out."

"Can do," Ciel said and pointed at a familiar stop light. It looked backlit by pulsing red and blue lights, and Ciel's eyebrows furrowed slightly at the sight. He didn't think there was a club nearby. "Ah, right here."

Alois muttered a thanks and the car swung around the curve. He slammed on the brakes to keep from hitting a nearby parked police car, sending them lurching forward against the seatbelts.

"The hell?" Alois mumbled. He maneuvered around the cruiser and the car crawled forward. "Must've been an accident or something."

Ciel nodded and his eyes honed in on the ambulance. It sat too far away from Sebastian's apartment and a gust of air escaped his lungs in a rush. He didn't wish an accident on anyone, but he couldn't stop the relief from flooding his body knowing that Sebastian wasn't the one injured. The flashing lights continued to circulate, as they grew closer and Ciel briefly wondered if the same ambulance had passed them on the highway earlier. He winced, hoping they made it in time.

People stood outside the apartments in small groups, each muttering to each other. Ciel figured Sebastian would tell him what happened although it was disconcerting that an accident had happened so close to Sebastian's apartment. He wasn't so much worried for himself but rather Sebastian. What would happen to Sebastian if there were a fire or some natural disaster?

"I wonder what happened," he muttered, hoping to derail his previous thoughts.

Alois shrugged as they drew closer to Sebastian's apartment. "Dunno," he said, his voice quivering slightly as the car slowly crept past the ambulance.

Several police cars sat parked on the other side of the stationary vehicle and the previous relief Ciel felt escaped his body. Numbness replaced it, touching him with a cold touch that he felt down to the marrow in his bones and Ciel started to shake. His heart raced, pounding painfully in his chest and his ears rang with a high-pitched tone that seemed to drown out every other noise surrounding him while his world narrowed down to a single point.

A lone cruiser sat halfway on the road and halfway on the sidewalk, the driver door still open. And the car pointed right at Sebastian's apartment. Sebastian's apartment, where police crowded around a stretch of yellow tape that fluttered in a light wind. Where the door stood wide open, with darkness standing like death in the doorway.


	13. Opus 13

**A/N**: Posting this via my phone, as I'm in Okinawa, so I hope everything goes well :/ Thank you everyone for your wonderful support. It truly means a lot to me. I hope y'all enjoy the chapter ^^ Many, many thanks to **socialbutrfly1379 **for being my amazing beta again! She was awesome working on this story :3

**Warnings**: **Homophobia, slurs, mentions of violence, blood, and language  
**

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Kuroshitsuji

* * *

Ciel's hands scrambled for the door handle, missing the first two tries as they shook so badly. The door finally opened and he didn't bother to wait for Alois to stop the car. He hit the ground, knees scraping against the pavement as Alois shouted at him but Ciel pointedly ignored him. The only thought on his mind was to get to Sebastian.

He couldn't breathe. It was a struggle to take each breath and his body refused to work properly. It felt like his limbs were weighted down with lead and they could only drag helplessly against the ground with each step he tried to take. Even his hearing refused to work, the whine in his ears pitching to high-pitched noise that threatened to deafen him.

Briefly, Ciel wondered if this was what it felt like to have an out of body experience. He couldn't even feel his body and Ciel could barely even comprehend the actions he performed. Everything he did came from muscle memory. It forced his legs forward, even though they felt awkward and strange. He couldn't feel each staggering step he took, but his mind did.

The only thing, surprisingly, that he was aware of was the loud beat of his heart and the way he drew oxygen into his lungs. The frantic thumps echoed in his ears and pulsed throughout his body. Funny that he had never heard it so clearly before. He likened it to waking up from a near death experience even though he was very much so alive.

But what about Sebastian? Was he still alive?

The thought had him stumbling forward and sent his heart into chaotic overtime. His breathing caught in his chest and then quickened, heavy pants falling from his breath. The two sounds blurred together, threatening to drown out the high-pitched whine that still rang in his ears. But amidst those noises, Ciel's thoughts raced the loudest.

Sebastian, they repeated. What had happened to Sebastian?

Something had happened, otherwise there wouldn't be so many police cars and an ambulance parked on his street. And if Ciel had to wager a guess, the oddly parked cruiser belonged to Claude.

He finally reached the apartment, approaching the barrier the police had set up. How he made it there in his dumbfounded state, Ciel couldn't guess but he assumed it had something to do with will power and the desire to know what had happened to Sebastian. To discover whether he lived or not.

One of the officers met him before he could duck under the yellow tape. "I'm sorry, Sir, but this is a crime scene. You can't come any further."

"No," Ciel said quickly, shaking his head and all his senses seemed to snap back at him with the simple human interaction. It reminded him that he wasn't alone here and the answers he sought rested just in front of him. "I have to, oh God, please. I have to see Sebastian."

"I'm afraid I can't let you do that," the officer said. She sounded apologetic.

"Please," Ciel begged and tried to see over the officer's shoulder. "Please, he's a close friend. What happened? Tell me he's okay." His legs trembled, threatening to buckle under his weight and Ciel latched onto the officer to keep himself steady. The pain from his earlier fall had started to make itself known, turning into a dull pulsing ache.

The woman gave him a sympathetic look. "I'm sorry; I can't release that information to you. You're not family and I have to follow protocol."

Ciel snarled. "Fuck your protocol. That's my, my," he choked on the word and his vision blurred. "You have to let me in! You have to let me see him!" Why could no one understand that?

A steady hand grabbed him under the arm and pulled him away from the officer. Ciel struggled, trying his best to fight against the newest person until they pinned his arms to his side. "Ciel, relax!" A familiar voice called to him and his vision slowly came back to him. Alois's face flickered in and out of view, and Alois gave him a light shake. "Come on, Ciel. I need you to focus."

He shook his head. "Alois," he said and his head cleared more. "What happened?" he asked weakly even though he knew Alois couldn't tell him. He leaned heavily against Alois and let his friend pull him into a warm embrace.

Alois made a soothing noise and patted his back awkwardly. "It's okay, Ciel," he said and Ciel took comfort in the easy words, letting them pacify his mind. He knew Alois didn't know what happened but hearing him admit that things were okay, helped ease him. He needed someone to tell him that things were all right, even if it was just a temporary lie. Alois continued, pulling him from his comfort zone once more. "Justice happened."

Ciel jerked back in surprise at the words and he gave Alois a confused look. "What?"

"Justice happened," Alois repeated and he looked oddly proud of himself.

"What are you talking about, Alois?" Ciel asked firmly, his senses jumping to alertness. Perhaps it was a defense mechanism that jump-started his system or maybe the shock had finally worn off. Whatever the reason, Ciel found himself thinking clearly and everything around him quickly sharpened.

Alois turned to look at the apartment and then back to Ciel. "We saved you, Ciel. Sebastian, he…he was corrupting you." Ciel's face screwed up into one of confusion and Alois plowed forward. "You had changed and Sebastian was behind it. We had to stop him from infecting you and everyone else."

Ciel's eyebrows pulled down and his eyes narrowed at Alois. "Alois, what are you talking about," he repeated. "You're not making any sense."

"The guys and I, we had to," Alois said and grabbed Ciel, giving him a small shake. "You had changed, Ciel. And Sebastian had done that to you. We couldn't let him do that without punishing him somehow. You don't know what he did but I swear we did what we had to. We couldn't let him go unpunished."

Ciel thrashed in Alois's arms and struggled vehemently to get free. "Let me go, Alois," he shouted, drawing attention to them. "I can't believe... Are you telling me you did this? You're behind this?" he spat, voice growing louder and more frantic. His mind had trouble wrapping around everything and it refused to believe a word Alois said.

"We had to, Ciel," Alois snarled and his features twisted into something ugly. "He's a fucking queer."

The words rang loudly in the still air between them and Ciel jerked back as though Alois had slapped him. It seemed like his heart had sputtered to a stop before it pitched forward again as the situation slammed into him. Frantically, it beat against his ribs until Ciel felt sick and he took several gulping breaths to quell the nausea.

Of all the things he expected Alois to say, that wasn't it. Ciel almost expected Alois to start laughing and call Ciel out for falling for his joke, but Alois's expression remained deathly serious. And if Ciel looked closely at Alois's eyes, he could see blatant disgust filling them.

The realization of the situation rushed over him like a wave, nearly barreling him over. It sent him flailing about in a large ocean, the surf constantly pounding against him and threatening to drown him. It was struggle to keep his head above water and with each gulping breath he took, he found that Alois stood there to push him back down again.

Cruel hands held him down in the water, refusing to let him come up for air until he desperately needed it. Not until he was on the verge of blacking out. He battled against the darkness that threatened to encroach on his vision and Ciel vaguely felt Alois shaking at him while he shouted something to his cotton filled ears.

"We had to Ciel." The words slowly sank their way into his subconscious. "He poisons society just existing. That's bad enough. But to go and pass his filthy disease onto you? That's unacceptable."

The harsh words battered against Ciel's body, sharp and stinging. They flayed his emotions and senses, but at the same time, sharpened his mind until Ciel's head reared above the crashing waves.

With a surge of energy that surprised himself, Ciel's hands lunged forward and grabbed Alois's upper arms, nails digging into pink skin. "It's not a disease, Alois!" he shouted. "Fuck, are you even listening to yourself speak right now?"

Alois's eyes narrowed. "See, he's already infected you with his faggotness."

"That's not even a word," Ciel snapped.

"Does it matter?" Alois retorted and pointed fiercely at the apartment. "The point is he tried to corrupt you. He did corrupt you. You're actually defending him and you believe that there's nothing wrong with him."

Ciel scowled. "That's because there isn't, Alois!"

He shook violently and his world tilted, pitching until it remained hard for him to stay standing. Never before had he expected this sort of reaction from Alois and it left him terrified but mostly hurt. Was this what Alois truly thought? Did Alois honestly believe that homosexuality was some form of disease?

"Why do you think there's something wrong with Sebastian being gay?" he asked quietly. He didn't want to know the answer but at the same time, Ciel needed to know. When had Alois started to think this way? He didn't remember Alois ever feeling this strongly about the subject and a hollow pit formed in his stomach. What had happened to the friend he once knew?

The person who stood before him now looked like a stranger. Blue eyes darkened with anger and filled with disgust. His shoulders tensed and Alois's fingers curled and uncurled, as though he wished to wrap them around Sebastian's neck. It was disconcerting and it left Ciel feeling lost.

"Alois?"

"Because it's disgusting and not normal," Alois spat and Ciel felt the world fall out from under him. The words struck strong and aggressive like a lightning bolt, firing down his body. It left him numb and Ciel almost forgot how to breathe. Alois continued. "McMillan always said fags are a poison to society and shouldn't exist. Seeing what that bastard did to you, I'm even more inclined to believe him."

And there it was. The true reason for Alois's sudden and almost violent change. Ciel didn't know why he didn't see it the first time and almost wanted to laugh at how quickly the situation had spiraled out of control. But all that escaped his mouth was a choked noise as he fought to keep his emotions at bay.

Everything had started out so right today too. Looking back though, Ciel could pick out Alois's strange actions throughout the day and suddenly they made sense. He didn't want to touch anything around Sebastian's apartment, too scared that it would infect him. How he didn't want Ciel to stay with Sebastian anymore. And then the game that Alois mentioned.

The call back at the restaurant were Alois's roommates letting him know that they were about to harm Sebastian. And throughout it all, Ciel never once stopped to suspect anything. Why should he? He didn't think Alois capable of this sort of violence and destructive thought. It only proved to show how much Alois had changed.

Ciel's fingers gripped the fabric of his pants tightly, using the material to keep himself anchored as he looked from Alois to Sebastian's apartment. He found himself faced with a choice, a road forked into two paths that stretched before him. Side with his closest and oldest friend, or with Sebastian. Loyalty versus heart.

With immense effort, he forced himself to step towards Alois. His legs refused to work properly and he stumbled over his feet before finding a shuffling pace that seemed to work.

Alois looked relieved as he came closer, his face showing that he was proud of Ciel for making the right choice. He reached for him, offering him a steady arm. "It's all right, Ciel. We'll help you," he cooed. "We'll rid you of whatever disease that fag forced on you."

Ciel's hand tore away from his pants and formed a fist, connecting with Alois's cheek. Alois staggered away from him and Ciel pitched backwards slightly as he had to stand on his own once more. It felt good though to see Alois hold his face and partially on the ground. Ciel moved forward to tear into him again.

Instantly, police rushed towards them and surrounded them. Hands grabbed at him, holding him back while Alois shouted profanities. Ciel ignored the stinging words that Alois launched in his direction along with the vindictive glares. He struggled in the officer's grip and thrashed against their hold. "Where's Officer Faustus?" he snapped, twisting this way and that way in an attempt to get free. "I want to speak with Officer Faustus."

"Calm down kid," the officer grunted.

"Not until I speak with him," Ciel snarled.

"Someone get Faustus!" an officer shouted and Ciel gave one more struggle before calming down. He glared at Alois as they waited, the officers refusing to let them go until they had both calmed down.

A few moments passed before footsteps jogged down the steps and approached them. "This better be good," Claude growled as he approached them. Ciel tried to twist in the officer's hold so he could see Claude but the man held him steady. He could hear the strain in Claude's voice and it only strengthened Ciel's resolve.

A nearby officer drew closer. "Sorry Faustus. Someone asked for you and refused to calm down until he spoke to you." The officer gestured to Ciel and finally they angled him so he could see Claude.

"Claude," Ciel begged. "You have to let me see him, please."

Claude closed the distance between instantly and pulled Ciel from the officer's arms. "This one is fine," he said and turned to look at Alois. His eyes narrowed and filled with something Ciel couldn't place. "Hold the other one until I can talk to him."

Alois started to curse again, struggling against the two police officers holding him. Ciel pointedly ignored him as he hurried after Claude. His chest ached at the thought of Alois going to prison for his actions but his mind tried its best not to think about that. Not when Sebastian raced to the forefront the moment they climbed the steps.

"That's Alois, isn't it," Claude said and stopped in the doorway. Cold but calculative amber eyes glanced at Alois in the back of his cruiser.

"Yeah," Ciel said quietly. "He's…he's an accomplice to whatever happened," he finished with a rough whisper.

Claude grunted. "I know."

Ciel looked at him. "You do?" He jogged after Claude when he turned from the doorway and stepped further into the apartment. His nose scrunched at the faint smell of ammonia that seemed to float through the apartment. "Claude, what happened? How did you know?"

"Later," Claude said and they stopped just before the kitchen. A heavy hand rested on Ciel's shoulder and he felt it tremble ever so slightly. "I won't tell you not to look, because I know you want to see him. But I'm going to warn you now that you won't like what you see."

"I can handle it," Ciel said even though his heart raced at the base of his throat, threatening to choke him. "I need…I need to see that he's that okay."

Claude snorted. "He's not exactly 'okay', Ciel. He was attacked and his attackers had every intention of harming him. I'm taking a risk just by letting you in here to see him."

The words struck Ciel harshly and the situation quickly set in. This wasn't some TV crime scene, this was real. Somewhere, Ciel had already known that but he had clung to the hope and thought that maybe it wasn't as bad as his mind made it out to be. He didn't know what he expected though. To go in and find Sebastian laughing while he played with Soot? Like nothing had just happened? There was an ambulance sitting outside for fucks sake.

He swallowed and nodded tensely, unable to trust his voice. His stomach continued to churn and dinner threatened to come up again. He swallowed once more, forcing down the bile and took a deep breath to steady himself. The ammonia smell he had detected had grown stronger and it made Ciel realize the odor probably originated from the kitchen.

He wanted to ask about the smell but knew Claude wouldn't tell him yet. Already, Claude looked anxious to get back to the kitchen and Sebastian's side. Ciel swallowed the question and nodded. He would ask about it later.

"Remember what I told you," Claude said and pushed up his glasses before rounding the corner.

Ciel gulped and trailed Claude, forcing one foot in front of the other. At first, he couldn't see anything as Claude's body blocked his immediate vision. But as they moved further into the kitchen and Ciel could see the start of deep red puddles that he knew were blood and his stomach churned violently at the large pools.

It looked like he had stepped into a horror scene with the amount of blood that covered the floor. His stomach pitched and before Ciel could try to quiet it, he doubled over and vomited onto the floor. The acid burned his throat and nose; making his eyes water but he couldn't stop gagging. There was so much blood.

Claude's hand settled on his back, rubbing soothingly as Ciel started to dry heave. "Breathe, Ciel."

"Oh God," Ciel gasped and his empty stomach clenched. He had nothing left to give but it still wanted to roll and pitch and his stomach muscles protested every motion. "All that blood," he trailed off and heaved again, spitting on the ground when nothing came out.

"It's not all his," Claude reassured him. "Most if it belongs to one of his attackers. From what we can understand, Soot attacked him and tore him up pretty well. I've never been so glad with Sebastian's choice not to declaw her."

Ciel made a quiet noise and wiped his mouth. "Is she okay?"

Claude's hand lifted. "We haven't found her yet, but she's likely hiding with all this commotion." He paused. "Finding her wasn't exactly our priority when we got here."

Ciel nodded as he straightened. As cruel as it was, they had to worry about the human lives first before dealing with the animal ones. Soot would come out eventually. He turned around to look at the kitchen again. His vision swam briefly but the blood on the floor didn't look as bad as he first thought. It was more than Ciel ever wanted to see in one place, but was nowhere near what his panic addled mind originally saw it as.

His eyes darted past the blood and quickly settled on Sebastian. The paramedics had already strapped him onto a backboard and a gurney sat lowered near one of the paramedics. Ciel swore and clutched the edge of the counter for support. Sebastian looked horrible.

"He's not dead," Claude said helpfully.

"Oh thanks," Ciel drawled. "Like that helps." But it did help and his erratic heartbeat slowed down a notch or two. The words repeated themselves in his mind. Sebastian wasn't dead. He was injured but not dead. Ciel would rather take the former compared to the latter.

Ciel stepped closer, holding a hand over his nose as the smell of ammonia grew even stronger and he glanced at the pile of soaked fabric on the floor. He looked back at Sebastian, noting he wasn't wearing a shirt and that only a blanket wrapped around his torso to keep him covered. Further behind the gurney, an empty bottle of ammonia sat on the counter with a plastic marker sitting next to it for evidence.

He turned his attention back to Sebastian, wanting to get closer. He wanted to rush forward and grab Sebastian's hand to feel the familiar touch of his hand and feel the warmth of a living body, but his body refused to move. Instead, he could only stand rooted to the spot as he looked at Sebastian, feeling hot tears burn against the back of his eyes.

He blinked them back and tried his best to remain standing. "Oh God, Sebastian," he whispered and his eyes swept over the soaked hair before taking in the bruised face, speckled with blood. Ciel hesitated to say that it was the only damage Sebastian had sustained and he turned to Claude. "What happened to him?"

Claude frowned. "They think he has a few broken ribs. His sides are bruised pretty badly and he has some light chemical burns on his arms and face." He wet his lips. "They don't think the ribs punctured his lungs though."

"There's something else," Ciel pressed.

A pause and Claude's eyes narrowed slightly. "There is, but we won't know the result of it until a doctor looks at him."

Ciel frowned and the unease churned to life in his stomach once more. He didn't like the look on Claude's face and he desperately wanted to know what secret Claude kept from him. "What happened?"

"Later," Claude said as one of the medics approached him.

"Sir, we're going to transport him to the hospital now. Will you ride with him?"

Claude looked around the kitchen and to the other officer that stood in the doorway. Confliction warred in his eyes. "I…," he started but the officer interrupted him.

"We got it from here, Claude. Go with him, he'll need you if he wakes up," the man said gently. "We'll finish collecting the evidence."

Claude nodded and Ciel took a step forward. "I'm coming too," he said.

The paramedic shook his head. "We won't have room for you."

Ciel opened his mouth to argue but Claude waved his hand. "I'll call for Ron to take you to the hospital," he said.

"Okay," Ciel mumbled, not happy but he knew better than to argue.

He stepped to the side as they wheeled the gurney past him and Ciel tried to watch for as long as he could until they disappeared out the door. It didn't take long before the sirens started to wail again and Ciel leaned heavily against the wall as the ambulance drove away. He took several deep breaths to compose himself and opened his eyes to look at the other officer.

"I'm…," he paused, trying to get his mind to focus properly. "I'm going to find Sebastian's cat. He'll ask about her the moment he wakes up."

The officer frowned and seemed to debate with himself before eventually nodding. "Just don't touch anything if you can help it. I still need to take pictures in the living room for evidence."

Ciel nodded and carefully pushed away from the wall. He stumbled out of the kitchen, glad to leave the heavy ammonia smelling room and the puddles of blood. A piece of paper crumbled underfoot and Ciel quickly jumped to the side to avoid stepping on it. A trail of white led into the living room and Ciel followed it, making sure not to step on the pages.

They were all blank and Ciel wondered where they had all come from. If anything, Ciel expected to find the staff on the littered pages but they lacked any print. He stopped when he reached the living room and the area swam before him. He almost pitched to the side as surprise assaulted his body and he gripped the chair at Sebastian's desk for support.

The once pristine living room where they had spent so much time at lay in ruins. Books that had once filled the bookshelves lay scatted on the ground, pages tore out. Ciel glanced at the pages behind him and in the faint light; he could see the raised dots on the pages. He shook his head and winced when it only made the room spin even more.

The coffee table and end tables had overturned, their contents spilled onto the floor. The entertainment center remained standing even though it looked like they had tried to overturn it. It must've been too heavy and in the end, they settled for scattering the movies and slashing the speakers. The destruction looked more like a tornado had ripped through the area than something created by human hands.

But the devastation paled in comparison to what laid beyond that. Ciel had always heard tales of the violence and hatred that filled humans, but he never expected to witness it firsthand. He never wanted to. Yet, standing in front of the vandalized apartment, Ciel found himself feeling very small compared to humanity.

Black spray paint dripped from the windows and walls, cruel slurs painted across their surfaces. The dark words stood out in stark contrast to the vivid colors on the wall and seemed to infect everything it touched. It darkened the room, leaving it feeling tainted. It left Ciel feeling sick again and he pressed a hand to his stomach in hopes to calm it. And at the same time, it made the blood boil in his veins.

Ciel turned on his heel, putting his back to the words. He couldn't look at them without wanting to challenge the paint. But they were just words and held no meaning if he ignored them. The slurs would always hurt when aimed at him, but Ciel did his best to see past them. He had a job to do – find Soot – and he couldn't let his anger distract him from that.

Instead, he started his search, beginning with Sebastian's room first. He approached it cautiously though despite his determination to find Soot. Who knew what waited for him behind the closed door. Would he find Sebastian's room destroyed in the same manner of the living room? The thought had his heart in his throat and Ciel forced himself grasp the handle.

It stayed still though under his hand and Ciel jiggled it a few times, finding it locked. His eyebrows pulled down slightly and his hand fell away. Either Sebastian had locked the door before the attack or someone had locked it after destroying the room. Ciel could only hope it was the former and he turned from the door, filling the question away for later.

He moved back through the hallway and stopped in front of the piano. It looked undamaged, as did the desk and Ciel let out a sigh of relief. While it didn't change the damage that had happened in the living room, Ciel could accept small favors when they presented themselves to him. He didn't know what Sebastian would do if something had happened to his piano or work desk.

He continued down the hallway and checked Mey-rin's room. He found it locked as well – no doubt Mey-rin had locked it before she left - and Ciel briefly wondered if anyone had called Mey-rin yet. Or any of Sebastian's other friends for that matter.

A quick check of the bathroom found it empty and Ciel continued his search of the downstairs area. She wasn't in the laundry room or front closet, and Ciel looked at the front door. He winced and sincerely hoped that Soot hadn't run outside. He wouldn't know how to explain that to Sebastian. While Soot was smart and had an innate sense, the uncertainties as to what could happen to her remained immense.

Ciel looked up stairs and mounted the steps, hoping to find her there. It was the one place he hadn't checked yet and with any luck, Soot had hidden herself up there.

"Soot," he called softly once he reached the landing. He clicked a light on, illuminating the loft and called her name again. He walked the length of the loft, searching under the desk and behind the chair, finding nothing. He even checked the bathroom despite finding the door shut upon his arrival, thinking that perhaps Soot had shut it herself.

His shoulders slumped upon finding the powder room empty and he backed out of the room. He didn't want to go back to the hospital empty handed but with the way his luck was, Ciel didn't think he would have another option.

"Soot," he tried once more and strained his ears for a sound. He choked on his saliva when the faintest tinkle of a bell reached his ears. Blue eyes darted around as he called her name, another jingle answering him. It came from the closet and Ciel made his way over to the area. He had already searched there and hadn't found anything but he swore the sound came from the closet.

He pushed aside the objects on the floor, trying his best not to startle Soot or harm her. The bell sounded again, followed by a weak cry that had Ciel looking up from the floor where he originally searched.

He nearly jumped back when one of the towels moved. It shuffled again and a head appeared, followed by two dim eyes. "There you are," Ciel breathed. "No wonder I couldn't find you the first time. You looked like a towel all smooched together like that."

Soot simply mewled at him and Ciel rolled his eyes at the pitiful sound. He reached for her only to jerk his hand back when she yowled at his touch. Ciel stared at her and went to try again, stopping when a splash of red caught his attention. Ciel drew his hand back and looked at the crimson color, quickly recognizing it for what it was.

Blood.

Ciel swore and shifted on his knees as he looked at Soot. She gazed back at him, eyes almost dead and lifeless. "No," he cursed and his mind raced. "Fuck, Soot. Don't you dare die on me, you hear!"

A weak mewl answered his frantic tone and Ciel leaned forward. His hand settled on the stack of towels she rested on and he ignored the low growl she gave him. Muttering an apology, he started to shift the stack. He tried his best not to jar her too much and she hissed at him a couple times but lacked the energy to swipe at him.

It took longer than Ciel wanted but he finally pulled her free. His hand trembled as he rubbed her ears, the one spot she let him touch, and he murmured soft words to her as he stood up. "We need a vet," he shouted as he made his way to the steps. "She's badly hurt too."

The officer met him at the bottom of the steps and eyed Soot as Ciel walked up to him. "She's not going to make it."

"She will if we get her to a vet now," Ciel snapped. He couldn't and wouldn't let Soot die. Not after she had attacked someone to help save Sebastian. She risked her life to help Sebastian and he'd be damned if he let her die.

"It's after ten, kid. No one's open."

Ciel scowled. "Someone has to be." Someone had to take her. He turned on his heel and stormed outside. He would find someone to help him. "I need a vet!" he yelled, drawing attention to himself. Sebastian's neighbors still stood out on the sidewalk and crowded closer at his interjection.

But despite his frantic tone, no one moved forward to help. Instead, they simply stared at him as though he spoke another language and Ciel tried his best to fight back the emotions that threatened to choke him.

"Please. She helped save Sebastian. She shouldn't have to suffer because of that," he said and Soot gave a feeble cry. "Sebastian's already endured enough. Would you want to tell him that his beloved companion is no longer with him because no one did anything? What would you do if this were your pet? Please. Don't let her die."

The words seemed to spark something in the people standing around and almost instantly, they burst into a flurry of motions. Phones appeared from pockets and Ciel sank to steps, faint relief spreading through his limbs.

He pulled Soot closer to his chest and pressed his forehead to her head. She weakly butted his head and Ciel squeezed his eyes shut. For once, his allergies stayed at bay, letting him offer much needed comfort to Soot as he whispered words of encouragement to her.

After seeing the destruction in Sebastian's apartment and to Sebastian himself, Ciel had started to lose faith that any good existed still in society. That people still acted in such a violent and unforgiving way was disheartening. Wasn't it bad enough that they had to face the perils of nature and sickness? Those were hard enough to fight off without the added threat of other humans. Yet they had to fend off each other on top of things they couldn't predict or cure.

But seeing everyone gather and pull together for a stranger and try their best to accomplish something deemed impossible, helped bolster Ciel's downtrodden spirit. They came to help, without once dwelling on who their neighbor was, whether Sebastian was blind or not. Gay or not. They helped despite the color of skin, ethnicity, religious beliefs, income, or social status. They came and offered help simply because they cared and it was the right thing to do.

"You're going to live, Soot," Ciel said strongly even though his voice quivered with unshed emotions. Overhead, the stars had started to come out, shining faintly against the brighter city lights, but they still bore witness to the happenings below their feet. "I swear to you that you'll survive."

Faint voices murmured around Ciel but their words escaped his grasp. He only heard the soft rolling pitches of the nature around him and the labored breathing that came from Soot. A single, hot droplet escaped his clenched eyes and fell onto Soot's head.

It carried a pleading hope in its iridescent form. A form so small and obscure, a drop quickly brushed away by many who choose to ignore it. But the hope remained strong and powerful, and hope, once born from the embers of a dying fire couldn't easily die. It had the chance to erupt into life, like a phoenix aborning from its ashes.

A hope, that both Sebastian and Soot would pull through.


	14. Opus 14

**A/N**: Thank you everyone for your wonderful support. I hope y'all enjoy the chapter ^^ Many, many thanks to **socialbutrfly1379 **for being my amazing beta again! She was awesome working on this story :3

**Warnings**: Language**  
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**Disclaimer**: I don't own Kuroshitsuji nor the quote used in this chapter.

* * *

Long streaks of light flashed by, each one tracing over the curvatures of the car as it moved down the highway. It bathed the car in small snippets of light and then plunged it into darkness. The pattern continued, light to dark, and then back again until Ciel simply blanked out the steady changes. Watching them only made his head hurt and they did nothing to stop his thoughts.

They raced at speed that left it near impossible for Ciel to stay focused on any one subject for an extended period of time. His thoughts flickered and bounced from one thing to another. Oddly enough, Ciel found comfort in the action. It kept his mind distracted in a sense and didn't allow him to focus on one thought for too long.

Next to him, Ron remained silent and didn't try to start a conversation. Each held their own thoughts and neither wanted to speak them aloud. The attack still loomed heavily over them, still stood fresh in their minds. Ciel doubted that the memory would ever fade even after a decade had passed. And if the sights and memories were that clear for him, Ciel couldn't imagine how sharp and deeply imbedded they would stay in Sebastian's mind.

Whatever physical trauma he suffered, it probably paled in comparison to the mental trauma. The thought made him shudder before his mind raced forward to the next thought. He likened the fast-paced action to a defense mechanism. It kept him from dwelling on any subject for too long, lest it send him into a panicked state.

His thoughts circled though, bouncing from one point to another before eventually coming full circle. And once more, Ciel found himself pondering what Claude had refused to tell him earlier. Something else had happened to Sebastian; something that Claude seemed hesitant to talk about. Instead, Claude skirted around the topic like a guilty child hiding the truth from their parents.

What that subject was though, Ciel didn't have the faintest idea. But it had created an itch under his skin that he couldn't scratch. Only Claude could quell the itch.

His mind moved forward again, shifting gears and turning its attention back to Alois. That was one part that Ciel still had trouble wrapping his mind around. How could Alois submit to something like? How could he let his roommates turn so violent on an innocent man and then condone their actions? Worse still, how could Alois not look guilty?

Never once did that emotion cross Alois's features. Anger and disgust were the only emotions that Ciel could see clearly, and they had directed themselves at Sebastian. And then they turned in full to Ciel when he betrayed him.

Ciel had seen the accusing eyes glare at him as the police separated them. He had heard the shouts, despite his best attempt to disregard them, as he walked into the apartment with Claude. The aggressive sentiments stung deeply and pulled like barbs at his heart. With each word Alois spat, Ciel could feel them digging deeper and deeper, severing the ties of their friendship.

Ciel had no doubt that after this, nothing more would remain of their friendship. Alois had chosen his side and Ciel his and they stood on opposite sides of the bank. A deep chasm divided them, one that only appeared to grow larger as time passed. Alois wouldn't forgive him for basically turning him into the police. And Ciel couldn't absolve Alois's actions.

He couldn't even find himself to accept Alois's thoughts. He knew everyone remained entitled to their own thoughts and feelings, but try as he might, Ciel couldn't do it. Perhaps if Alois hadn't resorted to such violent acts, Ciel might've been able to – if not grudgingly – acknowledge them. But as it was, the anger and pain had burned itself too deeply in Ciel's mind.

And in the end, could a homophobe stay friends with a homosexual? It sounded unlikely, even though Ciel had seen stranger things online. Cats and mice playing together, or dogs and cats getting along. Natural enemies yet there remained a few exceptions. So why couldn't he coexist in harmony with Alois?

Ciel sighed, already knowing the answer. The human mind wasn't so easily convinced or turned after staying set in its ways for so long. Change was new. It was scary. To defer from the old and accept the new meant accepting new things and the chance of uncertainty boded too dangerous. Safety came about through the familiar, and as humans, they were reluctant to break that.

Alois's actions only showed that. He feared Sebastian had turned Ciel gay and he worried about what that would mean. He had gone as far as having his roommates attack Sebastian to prevent that. Ciel shuddered to know what Alois would think or say when he found out Ciel was gay. Had been for several years.

Again, his thoughts changed tracks and a blood-matted coat filled his mind. The heavy weight of Soot's body sat like a phantom weight on his lap and Ciel shuddered at the thought.

"We're here," Ron said, slowly coaxing Ciel away from his thoughts and depositing him in the here and now. He blinked, as though waking from a dream, and looked out the window at the bright hospital lights. "I can't stay, but please give my regards to Claude, and Sebastian when he wakes up. I'll make sure to stop by when I get off work though."

Ciel nodded and exited the car. The night air washed over him, warmer than the interior of the car and it wrapped around him thickly. Like a smothering embrace and Ciel gave his farewell before shuffling into the hospital.

The powerful scent of disinfectants nearly barreled him over and Ciel gagged at the smell. His empty stomach churned for a few moments before settling down and Ciel made his way to the front desk. He didn't know where to go or what to ask, only that Sebastian was somewhere in the large building and he needed to find him.

"Excuse me," he said as he approached the desk. He smiled and tried to sound as polite as he could. "A man came in here earlier, Sebastian Michaelis. Can you tell me his condition?"

The man looked at him. "Are you family?"

Ciel bit his lip. "No. But I'm a roommate. Does that count for anything?"

"I'm afraid not," the man answered.

"Can you tell me anything about him?" Ciel questioned. "Please?"

The nurse turned to look at the computer and tapped a few keys on the keyboard. "He should be in radiology right now for X-rays. There's a waiting room in that wing if you want to wait there for your friend."

Ciel nodded and muttered a tired 'thanks'. He turned to walk away but stopped and looked at the man again. "There was a police officer with him when he arrived. Claude Faustus. Can you call him?"

"He should be in the waiting room in the radiology wing as well. For safety purposes, we don't allow the public beyond those rooms. That includes officers of the law," the nurse said.

"I understand," Ciel muttered. "Thank you."

He wandered down the hall until he found a map of the building. He quickly located the wing in question and set off in the direction as quickly as possible. While it irked him that he couldn't go back any further to see Sebastian, he understood the hospitals concern. And at least he would have Claude to talk to. Perhaps then he would finally get some answers.

The tile made his footsteps echo loudly throughout the vastly empty hallway and Ciel tried to soften his steps. It felt disrespectful to make so much noise in a hospital and he breathed a sigh of relief when he reached the waiting room. He found Claude pacing the small room, making laps in such a frenzied pace that it made Ciel's head swim at the sight.

"You look like a first time father waiting for his wife to deliver," Ciel said as a way of greeting. He hoped it would make Claude settle down but even Ciel couldn't bring himself to smile at his own joke.

Claude looked at him, face tight and drawn. "I don't want kids," he said. "Demon little creatures." He tried to make a joke of his own, but like Ciel's, it failed to ease the tension around them.

"So?" Ciel prompted as he took a seat. His leg bounced a few times before he stood back up again, unable to keep still for even a short period. "What's going on?"

"They have him in for X-rays," Claude said and ran a hand through his hair. "They don't know if a rib punctured an organ or not and they're looking for internal bleeding as a precaution. They had an otologist look at him before the X-rays though."

Ciel frowned. "An oto what?"

"Otologist," Claude repeated. "They specialize in the ear."

His frown deepened. "Why would they need an ear specialist?" Ciel asked as Claude resumed his fevered pacing.

For several long minutes, Claude didn't answer and it only served to make Ciel even more nervous. The pacing put him on edge but the silence heightened it. Something had gone wrong, far more than what Ciel originally thought. Ciel patiently waited for Claude to still, knowing that this wasn't easier on him.

Finally Claude dropped heavily in a nearby chair and tipped his head back to look at the ceiling. "How about I start from the beginning," he said hoarsely.

Ciel took a seat across from him. "That works too."

Claude swallowed and Ciel watched the movement, looking for any means of distraction as Claude started to talk. "Sebastian called me around eight thirty or so. He told me someone was breaking into his apartment." He made a disgruntled noise and shook his head. "They came in the front so he really had no way to escape, but Sebastian's smart. He put the phone on speaker and then set it where the attackers wouldn't see it. I could hear everything that happened."

"The attackers came in but Sebastian attacked them first. He stood in the kitchen and hit the first person with a pan." Claude chuckled despite himself. "It broke the bastard's nose. But his second attempt missed and he lost his edge. They fought and pinned him to the ground before finding out he couldn't see. After that, they started to kick and beat him."

Ciel's hands gripped each other to keep from shaking, but his shoulders still trembled. They quivered with a mix of hot anger at Alois's roommates, and fear and anguish at what Sebastian went through. It made him sick to his stomach once more.

Across from him, Claude shuddered and his knuckles went white against the armrest. Ciel swallowed and he forced himself to speak. "Claude?" he asked. "What happened?"

"They…they wanted to give him one final punishment for being gay," Claude whispered. "They wanted to make him deaf, so they poured ammonia in his ears."

"Oh God," Ciel wheezed and he felt heat press against the back of his throat, bile threatening to make itself known again. He forced it down, wincing at the taste but it did nothing to take away the words. Spots appeared in front of his eyes and the world swam. He couldn't even comprehend what that was like and once again, the cruelty of humans astounded him. "Sebastian," Ciel whimpered.

The thought of Sebastian without his hearing tore at him. Hearing was his gift, his livelihood. It was how Sebastian saw and created beautiful works. It was how he communicated with things that no one else could hear. And suddenly, someone stole it from him. Never again would Sebastian hear the thrilling noises from a thunderstorm or the gentle lulls of rain against the window.

He choked and nearly pitched forward but caught himself at the last minute. "Oh God, Sebastian," he cried, hot streams trickling down his cheeks. "Not that. Anything but that," he whispered.

Now the strong smell of ammonia throughout the apartment made sense, as did the empty bottle and soaked clothes. It made Ciel want to return the favor and douse their eyes with the toxic liquid. Make them lose something precious to them and see how they liked it. Ciel trembled with fury at the thought.

"I heard him scream," Claude said, breaking his thoughts. "God, that scream. I've never heard something so wounded and in pain before. It was worse than hearing them beat him earlier. I tried to get there on time, I really did. I tried everything I could but I was too late."

Amber eyes closed, long lashes meeting soft skin and Ciel watched as they stayed closed for a while. He couldn't imagine what it was like for Claude, to hear everything that happened. The shouting, the punches connecting with a helpless body, and then a wailing scream from someone who had just lost something precious.

"But you got there," Ciel reassured him.

Claude shook his head. "I got there too late," he hissed and Ciel traced a thin trickle of liquid that escaped the corner of Claude's eye. It dampened a patch of hair next to his ear. "That whole time, I had to listen to them beat him. I had to listen and know that I couldn't do anything for my closest friend but just listen. I felt so helpless," he finished with a whisper.

Ciel stood up and shakily crossed the distance between them. "But you were still there for him. It's more than anyone else could've done. You stayed brave for him and did what you had to do." He placed a hesitant hand on his shoulder. "In the end, you still saved him. Who knows what else they would've done had you not showed up at all."

Claude's eyes opened and he stared blankly at the ceiling. His eyes traced random patterns on the ceiling and Ciel didn't say anything even though he yearned to know what happened next. But this was just as hard on Claude as it was him, if not more.

"I arrived at his apartment a little after he screamed," Claude continued without warning. "I went in and found the kitchen a mess. Blood everywhere and the attackers were shouting. From what I understood, Soot had leapt out from under the sink and clawed up the guy holding Sebastian down. After that, things were in such chaos that they didn't have enough time to reorganize themselves by the time I showed up."

"Despite how much bravado they showed when wailing on Sebastian, they turned into scared children when I showed up." Claude grunted. "They nearly pissed themselves when I had them up against the wall. Bastards probably thought they would get away clean. I cuffed them and then radioed for an ambulance. Seeing Sebastian like that on the floor though. I'll never forget how broken he looked."

Ciel shuddered at the thought. Sebastian had already looked injured on the gurney when Ciel arrived. He didn't want to think how bad he looked when Claude found him. "Where are they now?" he asked, temporarily changing the subject. Claude looked at him and Ciel clarified. "The attackers. And Alois," he added as an afterthought.

Claude's eyes darkened slightly. "I had radioed for backup when Sebastian first called me. A few officers arrived after I did and one of them took them to the station for holding and questioning." He scowled. "We have enough evidence against them that it's nearly impossible for them to escape a sentence. I'm pushing for attempted homicide, simply because I believe that deep down, at least one of them wanted him dead."

"I wouldn't be surprised," Ciel muttered. He hoped they would get the justice they deserved, but it still stung and hurt to know that Alois would likely get the same sentence. Even if he didn't agree with Alois in certain aspects, he still didn't wish that form of punishment on him. But as Sebastian had said earlier, Alois had picked his path and would have to deal with the consequences later in life. He made his bed and would now have to sleep in it.

Silence settled over them and it only made the minutes stretch on longer. Ciel felt every minute drag by and despite the exhaustion that weighed heavily over his body, he refused to sleep. He couldn't. Not until he knew Sebastian's current condition, especially the results from the otologist.

The mere thought made him climb to his protesting feet and he started to pace. He made random patterns throughout the rows of chairs and felt Claude's eyes trace his movements. Something else nagged at his mind, something his memory urged him to remember. He had nothing left to ask, as Claude didn't know any more. But still, something remained.

He stumbled over his feet as the thought slammed into him and Claude looked at him curiously. "I just remembered," Ciel said and carefully picked his way back to Claude. His gaze fell to his hands, noting the flecks of red that covered his palm. "After you left, I searched the apartment for Soot."

Claude's fingers twitched. "I assume you saw the damage then."

"Yeah," Ciel muttered. "That was…frightening."

"It makes me glad that Sebastian will never see it," Claude murmured. "Once the police release the scene, I can clean up the place before Sebastian goes back home. At least they didn't do anything to the piano or his workstation. They probably didn't get to that. But you were saying?"

Ciel nodded and clenched his hand. "I found Soot hiding upstairs in the closet loft." He wet his lips and swallowed. "She wasn't in good condition," he finished in a whisper.

Claude sat up and focused his full attention on him. "What do you mean?"

"When I reached for her, my hand came back bloody. At first I thought maybe it was from the blood downstairs, but she was in pain and wouldn't let me touch her," Ciel said quietly. "The officer on the scene said she wouldn't make it because the vet clinics had closed already."

A curse fell from Claude's mouth and he looked as though he wanted to jump to his feet as well but barely remained sitting. "Shit, Ciel," he swore again. "Tell me she's not dead."

Ciel bit his lip. "I begged for help outside and Sebastian's neighbors found an emergency vet hospital to take her to," he said and closed his eyes. "She was alive when I passed her over to them. But that's all I know. They said they would call me if they had any news."

Claude ran a shaky hand through his hair. "Why Sebastian?" he hissed and slammed his fist down on the armrest, anger overriding previous emotions. "Why him? Hasn't he suffered enough already? Did they have to take away the two things he treasured the most? What the hell did he ever do to deserve all this?"

"She might live," Ciel said weakly but felt the same frustration as Claude. He didn't know how many times he questioned the same thing and asked himself that on the ride over. Why did bad things have to happen to good people? Everyone had their bouts of bad luck and times, but Sebastian seemed to draw the short end of the stick.

Claude didn't say anything and Ciel didn't expect him to. What more could they say? The whole situation left them drained and Ciel dreaded to hear the news from the doctors. He didn't see any way that they could bring them good news.

Minutes ticked by and Ciel had just started to feel the touch of sleep against his subconscious when the door to the radiology center opened. It jerked away the tempting fingers and Ciel startled to awareness alongside Claude.

"Officer Faustus," the doctor said and walked toward them. Claude stood up to greet her and they shook hands. "I'm Doctor Elizabeth Midford."

Claude's eyebrows furrowed and he peered at her. "You wouldn't happen to be related to a Doctor Midford, O&M Specialist, would you?"

Doctor Midford smiled softly. "That would be my mother, Doctor Frances Midford," she said. "Small world isn't it."

"I'll say," Claude muttered and turned to Ciel. "Her mother was Sebastian's specialist who worked with him when we were kids."

"So you know a bit about Sebastian," Ciel clarified.

Elizabeth hummed lightly and gestured for them to follow her. "A bit. Patient confidentiality keeps my mother from talking about her patients of course. But we met a few times. I was surprised when he arrived tonight, especially considering the circumstances."

Ciel bit his lip as they trailed her down a hallway. "How is Sebastian?" he asked, unable to remain quiet any longer.

She stopped outside a marked room with Sebastian's name on it and turned to the chart in her hands. "He's very lucky, all things considering. A few cracked ribs, mainly around ribs eleven and twelve but they didn't cause any renal injuries. They'll hurt for a while though and will impact his fluid mobility but other than that, we don't believe they'll cause any concern."

"He has some chemical burning from prolonged exposure to the ammonia on his skin, but it's not life threatening. With proper treatment, it'll heal soon and no longer cause an issue," Elizabeth continued and her eyes darted up to them. "On regards of the ammonia though. Officer Faustus, I believe you said they poured it into his ears?"

Claude nodded. "That's what they said," he said, a grimace flickering across his face. "They used a funnel to pour it in."

Elizabeth regarded her chart and then looked up. "Our otologist examined Sebastian's ears before the scans and from what he could see, there was no damage to his ears," she said and Ciel swayed on his feet. "He's unconscious still and we'll know for certain when he wakes up, but preliminary results showed no signs of inflammation or trauma in the ear canal."

"He's okay?" Claude whispered hoarsely. "He's not deaf?"

"From what we can tell, no," Elizabeth said. "I don't know what happened in those few minutes before you reached his apartment, but some form of miracle or luck happened to prevent what they wanted."

Ciel slumped against the wall and covered his face with his hand. "Oh thank God," he choked out and tipped his head back. The lights swam above him and it took him several minutes to realize that hot tears obscured his vision but he couldn't bring himself to care. Across from him, Claude didn't appear any better, his glasses off as he rubbed at his eyes.

"Can we see him?" Claude asked. His voice sounded thick and rough, the sound of someone trying to fight back emotions.

Elizabeth looked at her watch. "Technically visiting hours are over," she started. "But I can look the other way for a few short minutes."

"Thank you," Ciel whispered as she let them into the room.

He had to restrain himself from rushing over to Sebastian's side and gripped the side of the bed once he reached it. Claude stood stiffly next to him and they both looked at Sebastian. If Ciel ignored the discoloring and bandages on Sebastian's face, it almost looked like he was just sleeping. But he knew better than that and his fingers twitched, wanting to reach forward to touch Sebastian.

"Get better, Sebastian," he muttered.

Claude murmured his own sentiments and let out a shaky breath. Ciel nodded, knowing exactly how Claude felt and he scrubbed at his face, trying to control his emotions. A part of him just wanted to break down crying, in both relief and despair over everything that happened. The conflicting emotions had him wavering on his feet and Ciel steadied himself on Claude's shoulder.

They didn't say anything further until Elizabeth came back, gently telling them that they would have to leave. "I'll call you the moment he wakes," she said. "Feel free to come back tomorrow during visiting hours though and you can keep him company. Whether he's awake or not."

"Do you think he'll wake up tomorrow?" Ciel asked.

"I believe so," Elizabeth answered. "Sebastian is strong and has the determination to do what he wants. I have no doubt that he'll recover from tonight's events. Although I'm also certain that he'll have a few setbacks at first."

Claude nodded. "We'll be there for him," he said and Ciel voice his agreement.

Elizabeth smiled. "That's what I wanted to hear. Now go back and get some rest. I'm sure I'll see you two at some point tomorrow," she said and bid them goodnight.

Ciel sighed heavily and trudged next to Claude as they walked in the opposite direction. He didn't say anything until they reached the front and he called Hannah to come pick them up.

"You can stay with me for the time being," Claude said as they sat on a bench to wait outside.

"And just think, when we first met I refused to stay at your place and you refused to let me stay," Ciel pointed out.

Claude grunted. "I guess you've grown on me a bit, kid," he said and wiped his glasses clean.

The chorus of cicadas and crickets surrounded them and Ciel closed his eyes as he listened to them. They created a gentle orchestra of sounds, a song that enveloped their surroundings and he could almost imagine fireflies dancing around. It reminded him of Sebastian's music, alive and constantly moving.

"I just realized," Claude said in the still of the night. "Elizabeth's mother must be ancient by now."

Ciel turned to look at him, eyebrow raised, before they both started laughing. He doubled over next to Claude and continued to laugh until the laughter turned into tears that filled the night air.

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

Contrary to what Elizabeth believed, Sebastian didn't wake up the next day. He remained in a deep sleep and Ciel watched him, waiting for a sign. Something that would tell him everything was all right. The nurses gave him hopeful smiles when they came in throughout the day to check the fluids that dripped through the IV lines but couldn't tell him when Sebastian would wake up.

It was maddening and Ciel had taken up reading to Sebastian to keep his mind from racing out of control. All the dangerous what if's plagued him and several times Ciel had to stop reading to control himself.

Claude remained in no better state, but had his job to help keep him occupied. He couldn't handle anything regarding the investigation as he was too close to the victim, but he still read the reports and kept Ciel in the loop. As Claude thought, they had more than enough to press charges and convict them for aggravated assault with the intent to kill, along with several marks for vandalism. Only time would tell though if the conviction followed through.

The second day with Sebastian found them in the same position as the first. Claude grumbling about an officer's handwriting and Ciel patiently reading to Sebastian.

"Words are pale shadows of forgotten names. As names have power, words have power. Words can light fires in the minds of men," Ciel recited and jumped when Claude tossed aside a file in disgust and rubbed the bridge of his nose. Ciel gave him a flat look. "Was that really necessary?"

"Yes," Claude answered. "It made me feel better." He picked up another file and waved his hand for Ciel to continue reading.

Ciel grumbled under his breath and searched for the place where he had stopped. "Gah, I lost my spot because of you," he said and glared at Claude.

"Words can wring tears from the hardest hearts," a rough voice quoted. Stillness settled throughout the room and Ciel peeked over the book to look at the bed. Sebastian's head had turned to look at him and a faint smile – that looked maybe a bit more like a grimace – passed over Sebastian's lips. "Was that the next part?" he asked.

Ciel stumbled forward from the chair along with Claude, forgetting to let go of the book in his haste to reach the bed. It smacked against the bed and his fingers slipped along the edge, giving him a paper cut but Ciel ignored the sting. It only proved to him that he wasn't in a dream.

"You're awake," Ciel said and dropped the book as he reached for Sebastian. He grasped his hand and pressed it to his cheek, trembling at the warmth that emanated from the palm. It spoke of someone alive. "Fuck," he whispered.

Sebastian chuckled and then coughed, his throat dry. He accepted the cup that Claude pushed into his other hand and sipped carefully at the water before turning to look at Claude. "And you smell."

Claude shook his head. "Glad to see you haven't lost your sharp wit," he said but his face shone with happiness. He squeezed Sebastian's hand and stood up. "I'll call for a nurse."

He left the room and Sebastian turned back to Ciel, his eyes searching. "How long was I out?"

"Just yesterday," Ciel said, refusing to let go of Sebastian's hand. "It's Sunday. A little bit before noon."

Sebastian hummed but didn't say anything else. His thumb though continued to soothe over the back of Ciel's hand, a comforting motion for them both.

The door opened again, admitting Elizabeth and a nurse, and Ciel stepped back to let them talk with Sebastian. It wasn't until halfway through the checkup that Ciel realized Sebastian could hear them and he nearly laughed aloud at the relief it brought him. He didn't doubt Elizabeth when she said that Sebastian wasn't deaf, but she had warned that the real test would come when Sebastian woke up.

But seeing Sebastian interacting with them and hearing every word put Ciel's mind at ease. Sebastian could still hear, but to what degree, he still didn't know. And further, they still didn't know how he had escaped the torture that McMillan wanted to put him through.

Ciel shook his head and turned his attention back to Elizabeth as she straightened up. "I believe that's all I need Sebastian," she said. "I would like to keep you another night or two, just to make sure nothing else pops up."

Sebastian nodded. "That's fine," he said. "I'm in no hurry to move around right now." He gestured to his ribs and the doctor laughed. She bid them farewell and left the room, leaving them alone with Sebastian again.

Once alone, Claude cleared his throat as he took a seat next to Sebastian's bed. "Sebastian," he said carefully. "I'm sorry to ask this of you now, but I'm afraid I have to."

"You want to know what happened that night," Sebastian clarified and Claude nodded. Fingers gripped the blanket and then released it as Sebastian let out a long sigh. "I figured as much."

Ciel reached forward and threaded his fingers with Sebastian's again. He gave them a tender squeeze, letting him know that he was there for him.

"I was reading," Sebastian started and Claude's pen started to scratch notes. "Soot came over, looking to play and I played with her for a while before she came running back to me, frantic. That's when I heard them outside, picking at the lock. I called Claude to tell him about the break in while I locked my bedroom. Then I hid Soot under the kitchen sink. I thought it would be the safest place for her, because no one would look there."

"I turned the speaker volume down on the phone so they couldn't hear Claude on the other end and then hid it where they wouldn't see. Then I waited," Sebastian continued. His voice quivered only a few times and Ciel could feel Sebastian's palms sweating as he remembered that night. He pressed a quick kiss to the back of it and waited for Sebastian to compose himself. "They broke in a short while later and I listened to them come closer. I hit one with a frying pan. In the face I think."

Claude smirked. "Yeah, you nailed him. It broke his nose," he said.

Sebastian gave a faint smile. "I thought I heard something crunch. I remember his shout though." He closed his eyes. "But I missed the second time and hit the wall. It gave them the break they needed and someone tackled me to the ground. We fought but I was at a disadvantage and they pinned me down. Then they found out I was blind."

Ciel nodded and swallowed. Everything sounded familiar to what Claude told him the other day but it didn't make it any easier to hear again. If anything, it sounded worse coming from Sebastian. Because Ciel could hear the tremors in Sebastian's voice and watched as he tried to compose himself in an attempt to save face.

It was disheartening and Ciel knew that they had yet to reach the worst. The unknown part.

"We exchanged some words," Sebastian started again and he let out a shaky breath, his hand gripping Ciel's in tight embrace. "Then they started to kick and punch before someone suggested ruining my ears."

Ciel squeezed Sebastian's hand despite the already tight grip on his own. Sebastian's face had grown pale and cold sweat beaded along his upper lip. Across the bed, Claude made a soothing noise in the back of his throat and set his papers down. "It's okay, Sebastian. You can stop here if you want. You don't have to force yourself."

Sebastian's eyes fluttered shut and he breathed heavily for a few minutes, the heart monitor racing next to him. Ciel feared that a nurse would come running to check on him at any moment. The minutes remained painfully long as Sebastian recalled the memory in his mind and each flicker of emotion that crossed his face made Ciel wince.

The looks tore at him and he tried his best to console Sebastian as best he could. A quick look at Claude showed that he felt the same way Ciel did, a hint of guilt in his eyes. He had put Sebastian in his current condition by asking about that night, but Ciel understood his reasoning. Better to have Claude ask the questions than an officer Sebastian didn't know.

Finally, the heart monitor started to slow and Sebastian's breathing steadied. He muttered a soft apology to Ciel for squeezing his hand too tightly and then opened his eyes. "They had me pinned on my back, with one guy holding my legs and another sitting on my chest. He was the one who had the ammonia. The last guy knelt over my arms and held my head. He didn't think to secure my hands though. I guess he thought straddling them would keep me pacified."

"They had my head turned to the side and a funnel in my ear," Sebastian continued, one hand gripping the blanket and the other Ciel's hand. His knuckles had turned white and Ciel leaned forward to place a soft kiss on his temple. "I fought against them as one opened the bottle and did my best to gauge the attacker above me. Then, I grabbed his groin and pulled. He shouted and released my head, just as the person on top of me screamed, dropping the bottle. It spilled over my torso and head but I had enough of a distraction to crawl away."

Sebastian shook his head as though to dispel the thoughts and Ciel tried to shuffle closer. He already had trouble trying to imagine himself in the same position as Sebastian, bound and helpless to three attackers. But he had an advantage that Sebastian didn't. He could see and fight back a little better. Sebastian had to guess the situation around him.

For a few minutes, no one spoke and Sebastian took the time to compose himself once more. Ciel glanced at Claude, noting he clutched his notes tightly. Sebastian wasn't the only one who had trouble with recalling the story. With Sebastian's recollection, Claude could match the sounds he heard to what really happened, almost putting him at the scene.

The sheets rustled as Sebastian shifted on the bed. "It was chaos," he said quietly. "I remember hearing people screaming and shouting, yelling about Soot. I think she attacked one of them."

Ciel tensed at the mention of Soot and Claude tossed him a quick look, warning him not to say anything. "What happened after that?" Claude pressed.

"I blacked out," Sebastian answered. "I vaguely remember you coming in and shouting, but once you made it to my side, I don't remember anything."

Claude looked at his notes and a grim smile crossed his lips. "So basically, you grabbed his cock and freaked him out," he reiterated.

"I did more than just grab his cock," Sebastian said. "I grabbed anything I could and then did everything I thought of that would make him feel pain. Squeezed, twisted, pulled, clawed, you name it."

Ciel winced at the thought. Under normal circumstances, he would've pitied the man. That area was a sensitive place and once or twice, Ciel had ended up on the ground due to an unfortunate action. He didn't want to imagine what the attacker went through. But considering the situation wasn't normal, he found himself unable to do anything but snort at the man's pain.

Claude set his notes to the side and pushed up his glasses. "You're a vicious but clever man, Sebastian," he teased, helping dispel some of the previous tension. "I don't blame you in the slightest for acting the way you did. Although I admit that I would never think to do what you did. I learned something new."

Sebastian rolled his eyes and slumped against the pillows. "Nice to know," he said and turned to look in Claude's direction. Judging by the faint twitch of Claude's lips, Sebastian wasn't looking at him. "Thank you for coming though."

The stress on Claude's face melted away and he carefully embraced Sebastian. "Always for you, Sebastian," he murmured. "Always."

Ciel stood up and picked up the fallen book. "I'm going to stretch my legs for a bit," he said, wanting to give Sebastian and Claude some privacy. He knew he would get his chance later in the day and he felt it only fair that Claude have the same privilege. "I think the restaurant is open and I could use some fresh air."

Sebastian huffed. "Are you saying I smell?"

"Nah, but you said Claude did earlier," Ciel said with a laugh and bolted out of the room before Claude could start yelling at him.

With a pleased smile and a small skip in his step, Ciel started down the hallway. His stomach growled and he hurried down to the café. Of course, it had to be at the other end of the hospital, but the added distance would give Sebastian and Claude more time together. Claude was a familiar person to Sebastian, even more so than Ciel, and he would relax further with Claude around.

It would also give them time to compose their emotions, as Ciel had a feeling Claude had struggled to hold them back while Sebastian spoke. Without him there, he didn't have to worry about holding a brave face in front of Ciel. Not that Ciel would've judged Claude for anything he did, but it would make things easier if it were just the two of them.

He entered the café and quickly moved down the line, selecting the things he wanted. Outside, the sun shone brightly and Ciel took his food to the courtyard area. It had a large garden further away from the covered patio, large trees and vibrant flowers circling around a small pond. A nearby sign called it the healing garden and Ciel took a seat so he could face it.

The hot summer sun danced across the green grass and Ciel watched a few butterflies flitted about the tops of the flowers. The scenery and weather matched his mood, and Ciel found himself relaxing in the patio chair. The only thing that dimmed his thoughts was the vague reminder that they would have to inform Sebastian about Soot.

Ciel swallowed thickly around his lunch and tried his best to ignore the pressing thought. He didn't want to think about it now, not when everything seemed so perfect. Sebastian had woken up and Elizabeth gave him a clean bill of health. With any luck, they would release him tomorrow. Although they had yet to finish cleaning up Sebastian's apartment.

The police had released the scene late last night after collecting all the evidence they needed, leaving the daunting clean up task on Ciel. For most of the previous night, Ciel had stayed up, collecting the trash and replacing items back in their spots. He made a list of the damaged books that needed replaced and did his best to restore the living room to its former glory.

The only thing that still stood as proof that the attack had happened were the slurs that stained the walls. The dripping paint like blood trickling down sensitive and fragile human skin. He had no idea how to go about fixing the cruel words and had to track down Victoria for help.

The woman nearly attacked him upon his arrival, demanding answers and asking which hospital Sebastian was at. Claude, she claimed, wouldn't answer their calls. Ciel did his best he could to placate her and give her the answers he could before asking for her advice. If anyone knew about paint, it would be Victoria.

Ciel glanced at his phone. With any luck, Victoria had finished removing the slurs and repainting the damaged areas. He would call her in a few hours to let her know about Sebastian waking up and check her progress. It was selfish of him, but Ciel wanted some privacy with Sebastian before the rest of his friends came to see him.

He finished his lunch on that thought and stood up to stroll through the garden. A few other patients wandered around the grounds, admiring the natural beauty that surrounded them. It put them at ease and Ciel could understand why they called it the healing garden. It made him feel better at least and Ciel knelt to watch a small family of ducks swim through the water.

The wind shifted the leaves above and Ciel rocked back on his heels to find a more comfortable position. He wondered if he could take Sebastian out here before they discharged him. Perhaps the noises around them would help soothe his mind and possibly give him motivation. Although he doubted composing was the first thought on Sebastian's mind.

Or maybe it was. Weren't people who had traumatic experiences encouraged to reach out through means of art and music to express themselves? Sebastian always found comfort in the sounds around him and the feel of notes under his fingers. Perhaps composing would actually spur the recovery.

With the thought in mind, Ciel stood up to explore the rest of the garden. If he took Sebastian out here, he wanted to make sure he knew all the secrets and best spots. He wanted to help Sebastian recover as best he could.

An hour later, Ciel slipped back into Sebastian's room. Sweat trickled down his back and the sides of his face, and Sebastian looked at him. "Now you smell," he stated.

Ciel laughed. "I was outside for a while," he said and wiped the sweat on his shirt. "They have a nice garden. If you want, I can take you out there later."

"That sounds nice," Sebastian said. "Provided Doctor Midford lets me. If she's anything like her mother, I fear I might have to convince her."

"She seemed pretty nice Friday night," Ciel said as Claude approached him. His good mood quickly slipped away and his smile faltered at the look on Claude's face. "Ah, I need to talk with Claude real quick," he said as Claude opened the door.

They stepped out into the hallway and Claude shut the door behind him. Trepidation filled Ciel and his hand tightened on the rail that went the length of the hall. "He asked about Soot earlier," Claude said lowly. "I haven't told him anything yet."

Ciel swallowed and wet his lips. "You want me to tell him."

Claude looked pained as he nodded. "You know what happened best and you talked to the veterinarian yesterday." He twisted the watch around his wrist. "If we keep avoiding the subject, he's going to suspect. It's far better to tell him then to him in the dark."

He wanted to tell Claude that the darkness already surrounded Sebastian and bathed him in its inky touch, but he held back. Instead, Ciel nodded and pushed past Claude. He hated that Claude had forced the responsibility on him and wanted nothing more than to hide away from it. What right did he have to ruin Sebastian's mood. Hadn't he suffered enough while recalling that night for them?

Sebastian looked up as he took a seat next to him. "Nice talk?" Sebastian asked.

"Somewhat," Ciel murmured and once again reached for Sebastian's hand. "Claude said you had a question for me, regarding Soot?"

Sebastian brightened. "Yeah. Claude couldn't say much about her because he didn't see her at the apartment, but he said you found her."

Ciel shifted and wiped his free hand on his pants. "I found her," he clarified. "She was smart and hid upstairs in the closet. She tucked herself away on the top of some towels and nearly blended in. I didn't see her at first until she moved."

"That's my smart girl," Sebastian said with a laugh. "She knew how to take care of herself after attacking them."

Ciel squeezed Sebastian's fingers. "Sebastian, Soot was injured in the fight too." He winced when Sebastian's hand clutched his until his fingers started to tingle. "When I found her, she wouldn't let me touch her."

Sebastian didn't say anything, his eyes staring straight ahead but seeing nothing. His jaw clenched together and Ciel could see numerous emotions race across his features and through his eyes. It was unnerving and Ciel hated seeing him like this. Especially knowing that he had to deliver the news that led to this reaction.

"I managed to get her out though," Ciel continued softly, easily recalling that night. "Your neighbors and bystanders helped me find a place to take her, and eventually we found a clinic not too far from your place. One of your neighbors took her there so I could come here. They promised to call me when they had news."

Crimson eyes blinked and Sebastian swallowed hard. They were the only actions that told Ciel he listened and hadn't tuned him out. "Did they?" he finally asked. Next to him, the heart monitor had started to beep faster.

"The vet called the yesterday morning to say that they had to operate on Soot. One of the attackers must've thrown her against the wall when they tried to get her off," Ciel said. "He said she had multiple fractured ribs and they affected her breathing. They had to use an external splint to help her breathe properly."

"She made it through the surgery," he continued and took a deep breath to steady himself. "They're monitoring her but she's still weak from her injuries. The vet said her chances of surviving are low and that it depends on Soot's body and will. But they would try their best to increase her odds the best they could."

He fell silent and let Sebastian digest the news. His eyes flickered across Sebastian's features, watching him carefully and hoping that this wouldn't send him into a relapse of any kind. It wasn't the best of news but at least Soot hadn't died. She still had a chance at surviving and Ciel had no doubt that she would fight against death's grip. She was a tough cat.

Sebastian's grip loosened around his and Ciel's heart pounded painfully against his chest. "I hid her under the sink specifically so she wouldn't get hurt," Sebastian whispered and his voice wavered as he blinked rapidly. "She only left to protect me and it almost killed her. It might kill her."

"You don't know that," Ciel reassured him hastily. "She'll pull through."

"But what if she doesn't?" Sebastian asked. "Why did she have to suffer because of my actions? She didn't do anything to provoke their attack. They were after me, not her. Why her? Why her?!"

Pain darted across Sebastian's face as he jarred his ribs but it only seemed to make him more frustrated. Whether it was at the situation or himself, Ciel didn't know. He could understand Sebastian's feelings, the anger and irritation at everything, but he couldn't put himself in Sebastian's shoes. He knew Sebastian blamed himself for what happened to Soot and nothing they said would make him think otherwise.

That alone probably hurt more than anything. Sebastian cherished Soot and she gave him so much in return. To know that she was at death's door because of him made the pain unbearable. Nothing would soften that blow.

Sebastian's eyelids fluttered quickly, trying and failing to keep back the tears. They swelled into view, prickling the corners until a blink sent the first one tumbling away from its brethren.

Ciel stood up quickly and pulled Sebastian's head to his chest, cradling him carefully. Sebastian's shoulders heaved and unabashed tears slipped down the curve of his cheeks, dripping onto the blanket below. The muffled sounds of anguish had Ciel breathing harder as he tried to control the hot press against the back of his eyes.

But the distraught cries had the room swimming in front of Ciel's eyes and it wasn't long before he found himself joining the chorus. The instruments fashioned from their very bodies. An orchestra built upon and created from their emotions - a bow pulling across the strings that made them human.

* * *

AN: the quote Ciel reads is from 'The Name of the Wind'


	15. Opus 15

**A/N**: Almost didn't get this chapter up today :/ The internet decided to stop working for a while and we had a falling out for half an hour. But after a stern talking to, it decided to work again and now here we are XD I'm a little behind on answering reviews/PMs, but I promise I'll get to them! This has been an extremely busy week with getting ready to leave. I'm just ready for it all to be done now, haha. Thank you everyone for your wonderful support ^^

Many, many thanks to **socialbutrfly1379 **for being my amazing beta again! She was awesome working on this story :3

**Warnings**: Language**  
**

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Kuroshitsuji

* * *

Blue eyes squinted against the bright sunlight that filled a cloudless sky. Ciel found it ironic in its ways that the day would look and feel so perfect when it really wasn't. He knew Sebastian's release was a cause for celebration and that the cheerful sky should mimic their feelings. But Ciel only felt a twinge of happiness at Sebastian's release.

Instead, concern and worry overshadowed the majority of his emotions and it made him glare at the sun. Where were the dismal clouds and rain that should match his mood?

He turned his attention back to Sebastian as they walked to Claude's car. Sebastian hadn't spoken much since finding out about Soot the other day and crimson eyes looked exhausted. Ciel didn't know how well Sebastian slept last night but judging by the dark marks under his eyes, he would have to say Sebastian barely slept.

Elizabeth had warned that while physically Sebastian was on his way to recovery; his mind would take a while longer to recover. He had experienced something traumatic and she urged them to offer their support as best they could.

Ciel frowned and his fingers brushed the seam of his pocket, feeling the stiff business card that rested there. Elizabeth had handed it to them before they left, telling them to call her mother if Sebastian struggled with anything.

He hoped it wouldn't come to that and that Sebastian would bounce back without problems. But somehow, Ciel had a feeling things wouldn't work out that easily. The mind was a fragile place at times. It spawned dreams as well as nightmares, and spoke encouraging words alongside destructive ones. It could heal just as easily as it could damage.

They reached the car and Sebastian carefully climbed inside. He hissed briefly as his sore ribs protested his actions and he ground his teeth together. "This is annoyingly frustrating," he said.

Claude chuckled. "All the more reason to lie in bed and do nothing all day."

"Boring," Sebastian muttered.

"I'll find a way to keep you entertained," Ciel quipped from the back.

Claude made a face. "I really didn't need to know that," he said.

Ciel's face burned despite the low laughter that left Sebastian. "Th-that's not what I meant," he stated.

"Sure, sure," Claude said, waving his hand lightly. "Just make sure you put something on the door so I know what's going on. I'd rather not walk into a scene like that."

"Claude," Ciel groaned and banged his head against the seat in front of him. He huffed and then smirked. "I don't know. Maybe I should leave the door wide open. Entice you to join us. I'm sure we can make it worth your while."

Claude blanched while Sebastian chortled as best as his ribs would allow him. "If I weren't driving right now, I'd cuff you upside the head for that," Claude muttered.

Ciel snickered but didn't push his luck. Although he had accomplished what he wanted and made Sebastian smile for a while. If only for a moment, Sebastian could forget his problems and just relax. Ciel didn't know how long it would last, but he would continue to try his best to keep a smile on Sebastian's face.

Silence draped itself over the car, comfortable and cool as they continued driving. The scenery flashed by and it amazed Ciel at how familiar it had started to become throughout his stay with Sebastian. The city had a certain draw to it; the landscape, architecture, and the atmosphere coaxed him in and made it hard for Ciel to want to leave.

He turned his attention to the front of the car and looked at Sebastian's face in the reflection of the rearview mirror. "Victoria said she wanted to stop by and see you," he said. "She might already be there since we left later than I originally told her."

"Will anyone else be at the apartment or come later on?" Sebastian asked.

Ciel nodded. "I think Johan mentioned that he wanted to stop by tonight after work. But he stressed that he only wanted to come by and see how you were doing. As a friend. Nothing more," he clarified. As much as Ciel didn't want Johan around, he had a right to come see Sebastian. They were friends after all. Even though Johan clearly wanted more than that.

"So long as he doesn't come too late or stay for the night," Sebastian muttered and his fingers had taken up to tapping against the armrest on the door.

The steady beat sounded unfamiliar and Ciel watched as the fingers continued to move. They had a graceful air about them, long and thin – piano fingers, Ciel vaguely thought. With ease, they danced across the imaginary keys and played a piano that existed only in Sebastian's mind. Playing a tune only he could hear.

He tore his attention away from the fingers as they approached the apartment. "I'll make sure he doesn't overstay his welcome," Ciel said and the car came to a stop.

"Victoria is already here," Claude muttered as he turned off the car. He climbed out and circled the vehicle to help Sebastian while Ciel raced ahead to get the door.

The fresh smell of paint wafted over his senses when he opened the door and his nose crinkled. If Ciel could smell it, then he knew Sebastian would definitely smell it and more than likely question it. He looked down the hallway as Victoria approached him and he greeted her with a small smile.

"I tried my best to air out the place but you can only do so much in a day," she muttered as Sebastian walked up the steps. "I had hoped to hide it from him but I don't think that's an option anymore."

Ciel grunted his agreement. "Perhaps we can lie about the reason then," he said.

Victoria didn't say anything as Sebastian approached them and she carefully reached for him, taking care not to startle him. "Sebastian," she said and squeezed his hand. Her voice filled with relief and she gripped his hand tighter. "I'm so glad you're okay."

Sebastian smiled. "It'll take more than a few bigots to bring me down," he teased.

She wiped at her eyes and swallowed thickly. "Always the tough one," she said. "Again, I think it's a shame you weren't born a female. You could always get a sex change I suppose," she mused.

Ciel cleared his throat. "Perhaps we should go inside and get out of this sun," he said. "Doctor Midford said he shouldn't be on his feet for long periods of time just yet."

"Right," Victoria said brightly and gave a light tug to Sebastian's hand. "Then let's get you inside, shall we? I made lunch too, since Mey-rin is at work. She felt bad that she couldn't stay to welcome you back but she said she's coming home early tonight."

"What did you make?" Sebastian asked as they walked inside.

Ciel watched him carefully, noting the way Sebastian's nostrils flared at the heavy scent of primer that filled the air. Confusion flickered across his face before it vanished the next second. If Ciel hadn't looked for it, he might've missed it.

Victoria hummed. "Some of your favorites," she said and guided him to sit on the couch. "I'll be right back."

Claude followed her to the kitchen to help and Ciel took a spot next to Sebastian. On reflex, his hand reached for Sebastian in an attempt to offer support. Sebastian didn't look troubled and his relaxed face put Ciel at ease. He knew though that the absence of Soot in the apartment would take a toll on him sooner or later. The familiar jingle of her bell missing from his life now.

He waited for Sebastian to ask about the paint smell but it never came. Instead, Sebastian seemed content to doze next to him although his fingers continued to tap out the same beat as they did in the car. They never faltered, even when the sounds in the kitchen grew louder. Steadily, his fingers danced along his leg, the tempo varying in speeds throughout the piece.

Ciel watched the fingers as they moved, wondering what tune Sebastian heard and played. He wanted to hear the melody brought to life in a language he understood, but the notes and sounds stayed locked in Sebastian's mind.

"Is that a new piece?" he finally asked, unable to help himself.

Sebastian turned to look at him but his fingers never once stopped. "Hmm?"

"What you're playing," Ciel clarified.

"Ah. No, it's not a new piece," Sebastian answered. "It's an older one that I composed a while back. It's part of a private collection. I thought that, in light of things, it was only fitting."

Ciel shifted on the couch so he faced Sebastian fully. "I'm going to touch your face," he cautioned and only the smallest pause in Sebastian's fingers gave away his brief unease. Ciel reached forward, letting Sebastian hear him before he cupped pale cheeks. A dark bruise stretched across his jaws, distinct marks giving away where someone held his face. "Are you okay, Sebastian? Truly?"

The song continued to beat against Sebastian's leg, notes flowing on a staff that only he could see. There was some sardonic sort of humor to that, Ciel thought. In this situation, they were the ones who were blind. They were blind to Sebastian's music and for once, only Sebastian could see everything around him.

Footsteps approached them and the deaf melody tapered away. "I'm fine," Sebastian murmured, but his eyes lowered and Ciel knew it was a lie.

Ciel placed a soft kiss on Sebastian's forehead and carefully brushed his fingers through inky locks. "I'm here, if you need anything." Another kiss and Ciel backed away. "Lunch ready?" he asked.

Victoria gave an affirmative answer and she carried the large casserole dish into the living room. "I thought we could eat in here. The couch is much more comfortable than the table."

Claude grunted. "At least it's better than the first couch he had. That thing was as hard as a rock."

"But not as cruel or painful as the piano," Sebastian joked as Victoria handed him a bowl. He thanked her and leaned back against the cushions with a sigh.

"Never again," Claude muttered as he spooned some of the food into his bowl. "Evil thing."

Ciel rolled his eyes as he accepted the bowl Victoria passed him. "Drama queen," he murmured to her and she laughed. Claude shot him a glare but didn't say anything as they started to eat.

Ciel watched Sebastian as they ate, looking for any signs of distress. He knew Sebastian wasn't fine as he claimed, but he wouldn't push the subject with so many people around. Sebastian was a strong individual and after taking care of himself for so long, it wasn't the easiest to turn around and ask for help.

He understood the feeling though. How often did he hate swallowing his pride and admitting he was wrong in regards to something? Humans found it easier to avoid the problem rather than face it at times. At least Ciel thought so.

Sebastian's hand remained steady as he ate and he looked at ease, but Ciel didn't let himself relax just yet. He couldn't shake the haunted look in Sebastian's eyes earlier when they talked, nor the dismal words. They hid something Ciel couldn't place but he knew it tied into the beat that had played earlier between them.

With any luck, Sebastian would talk to him more freely when everyone left. If not, Ciel didn't want to push him to speak but he didn't know how else to approach the situation. He hesitated to call Elizabeth's mother and he had a feeling Sebastian wouldn't like that either.

He sighed and took another bite of lunch. If he thought his feelings cluttered and rolled together before, they paled in comparison to the tangled mess now. Ciel didn't know where to start and the thought of untangling them left his head pulsing. Pulling one string would loosen a knot but snarl the thread until two more knots appeared in its place.

Like chasing a shadow, Ciel could never win. It would constantly elude him and only the setting sun offered the sanctuary of peace. It would chase away the long stretch of shadows, vanishing them so Ciel could stop running. And hopefully in that reprieve, he could find the time and silence to sort through the mess.

Light conversation floated throughout the living room, bouncing from subject to subject and keeping the mood light. The minutes passed quickly, bleeding into an hour and the clock struck two. Victoria clicked her tongue. "I need to get back to the museum soon," she said.

"I'll start cleaning up," Claude said. "I'm sure you want your dishes back."

She smirked. "Yes please. Knowing the way you two are, I would never get them back in a timely manner," she teased.

Sebastian chuckled lightly. "It just means you should visit more. Maybe that's why I keep them here for so long when you do cook."

"I'll keep that in mind," Victoria said as she walked into the kitchen to help Claude. "Do you have any meds to take?"

"Yes mother," Sebastian drawled but his words held a warm affection to them. "I took some before I left though, so I'm fine for a while."

Ciel snickered next to him and passed his bowl off to Claude. "Are you drowsy at all?" he asked, noting that Sebastian's eyes had closed once more.

Sebastian didn't answer right away. "A little," he said finally. "I'll lie down after Victoria leaves though. The least I can do is see her out."

"I'm sure it'll be nice to sleep in your own bed again after staying in the hospital one for a while. It didn't look comfortable," Ciel said. "At least not compared to yours."

A small smile lifted the corners of Sebastian's lips but he didn't say anything else. His fingers twitched, threatening to start drumming again and Ciel caught his hand before they could start. He gave the warm fingers a loving squeeze, hoping to quell whatever itch irritated Sebastian's mind.

They sat in silence, listening to Victoria and Claude bicker over the proper way to wash dishes until at last, they had finished. Victoria made her way to the living room and Sebastian stood up, wincing slightly at the motion.

"Thanks for lunch, Victoria," he said and she patted his cheek. He scowled briefly then continued. "It was delicious."

"I'll have to cook more often for you then," she said and grabbed her purse. "You're too thin, Sebastian."

He smiled. "Hospital food will do that to you," he joked. "Take care of yourself, Victoria."

"You too," she said and checked her watch. "I need to get going. I'll see y'all around."

Ciel waved goodbye to her as Claude walked her to the front door. It didn't take long before it shut behind her and Claude came back, cleaning his glasses as he walked. "I should get going too," he said quietly. "I have to turn in some reports and check the progress of Sebastian's case now that we've added his story."

Sebastian made a small noise. "It's fine, Claude," he said. "You've already done enough for me. I don't want you to get into trouble over this."

Claude didn't look fully convinced and Ciel stepped closer to Sebastian. "Plus I'm here and Mey-rin will come home soon. We'll take good care of him."

"I'm sure you will," Claude said and tugged at his uniform. "Just…call me if anything does happen."

"We'll be fine," Sebastian reassured him and gently shoved his shoulder. "But we will."

Claude smiled. "Thank you. I leave Sebastian in your capable hands, Ciel," he said and winked. "And remember what I said about the door thing."

Ciel threw a pillow at Claude, pleased when it smacked him in the face. "Just go already."

Laughing, Claude held his hands up in surrender and gave one final farewell before leaving as well. The door shut a final time, leaving them alone in the quiet apartment.

"Don't sit down," Ciel cautioned as Sebastian started back to the couch. "Let's get you straight to bed. If you sit, you'll just have to get back up and I think the bed is more comfortable than the couch."

"What else did they do to my apartment?" Sebastian asked as he reached into his pocket for the key to his bedroom.

Ciel cocked his head. "What do you mean?"

Sebastian snorted as he unlocked the door. "I can smell the paint. I know something happened to cause someone, probably Victoria, to repaint my apartment." The door swung open and a familiar room greeted Ciel. "What did they do?"

He watched as Sebastian made his way over to the bed and gingerly sat down. The cushion molded around his body and enveloped him in a soft embrace that had Sebastian breathing easier.

With a small sigh, Ciel shut the door and walked over to the bed as well. "They vandalized some of the walls in your apartment. Victoria simply removed them as best she could and repainted them."

"Homophobic slurs," Sebastian clarified and Ciel winced at the blunt words.

"Yes," he said, unable to deny it. "They also trashed your living room, but I think you knew that."

Sebastian nodded and carefully tugged his shirt off. "I'm tired," he said.

Ciel ran his fingers through Sebastian's hair. "Then get some sleep. Doctor Midford said staying off your feet and rest will help you." He helped Sebastian under the covers, pleased that he didn't fight and accepted the offered help.

He pulled the blankets up and closed the thick curtains so they blocked out the bright sunlight. Behind him, the sheets rustled as Sebastian made himself comfortable on the bed. The noise made Ciel pause and he wondered if Sebastian felt lonely without Soot in bed with him. She slept with him and offered a silent comfort throughout the night.

"What are you going to do?" Sebastian asked, finally settling down.

"Nothing really," Ciel said. "Probably watch some TV."

Sebastian made a strange noise in the back of his throat and it tore at Ciel. "You're staying?"

Ciel nodded. "So long as you still want me to," he answered. "You extended the offer to me first and I accepted it. But it you want me to stay with Claude or at a hotel, I can."

"No," Sebastian said quickly and then repeated the word at a normal speed. "You're fine. I want you to stay."

Slowly, Ciel crossed the room and made his way over to the bed. Alone, he could hear the faint quiver in Sebastian's voice and it confirmed Ciel's belief that Sebastian put forth a brave face in front of everyone. But now that everyone had left, the fear of the attack came back and wasn't something Sebastian could easily shake.

"Do you want me to stay?" Ciel asked, searching for a deeper answer than what Sebastian first gave.

"Stay," Sebastian murmured.

Ciel nodded and reached for Sebastian. "I'll stay," he soothed. "Let me grab some extra blankets real quick."

He left the room and went to the living room, tugging the blankets off the back of the couch. He didn't want to harm Sebastian while they slept if he tossed and turned. Hopefully he could make a small divider with the blankets to keep him from flailing about.

Sebastian had already moved to the other side of the bed by the time Ciel slipped back into the bedroom. "How are your ribs?" he asked as he started to line the middle of the bed with the rolled up blankets.

"They hurt like hell," Sebastian grunted. "It even hurts to breathe."

Ciel's lips quirked slightly. "Well, you can't stop doing that," he said. He stepped over the pile of clothes that he dropped on the floor and crawled into the bed. His hand sought Sebastian's, reaching out to give it a tight squeeze. "Just remember that if you need anything, I'm right here. But don't you dare call me a maid."

Sebastian wheezed, his laughter strained. "The thought never crossed my mind." But his voice suggested otherwise and Ciel clicked his tongue. "You could always be my nurse," he suggested.

"Don't push it," Ciel warned but pressed a light kiss to Sebastian's temple. His lips trailed down a bruised cheek and Sebastian tilted his head so their lips met.

The simple action made them both moan softly and Ciel's lips parted to Sebastian when he licked the seam of his lips. Their tongues slowly danced and tangled around each other, simply feeling and reacquainting themselves to each other. It felt too long to Ciel since he last touched Sebastian and he needed to feel him to reassure himself that this wasn't a dream. That Sebastian was real and alive underneath him.

He broke away before things could grow anymore heated and Sebastian panted for breath. "Fuck," he groaned in pain and his fingers fisted the blanket. "That hurt but I don't regret it."

Ciel chuckled and pecked his lips. "We'll have to watch ourselves then," he said. "Only simple and light kisses for now."

Sebastian grumbled under his breath and Ciel swore he heard a pout in his tone. The sheets rustled again as they both settled down and Sebastian's hand searched for his once more. Ciel met him and laced his fingers through Sebastian's, while his other hand rested on the sharp jut of a hipbone. He didn't trust himself to cuddle any closer, but for now this would have to do.

It gave Sebastian the security he needed and quelled Ciel's desire to stay close to him. The method was a bit unconventional, but given the circumstances, it was the best he could do.

The darkened room surrounded him and Ciel listened carefully to Sebastian's breathing, waiting for it to even out. He wasn't tired but given time, Ciel would eventually fall asleep alongside Sebastian. And with any luck, their dreams would remain peaceful.

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

Ciel hummed quietly as he placed the thick books on the bookshelves. Behind him, Sebastian sat on the couch, reading the titles and arranging the books in the order that he wanted them displayed. Certain books belonged to series and Sebastian remained adamant that they went a certain way. Ciel didn't bother to argue and simply shelved them as Sebastian requested.

They worked in silence and Ciel reminded himself that Sebastian needed to order new speakers. It seemed strange not to hear music floating throughout the apartment.

"You have a lot of books," Ciel commented as he turned around to grab a new stack.

"I like to read," Sebastian answered. "Books take me to a new place in my mind."

Ciel smiled. "So does your music," he stated and set a new book on the middle shelf. "Speaking of, we can look at speakers after this if you want. I don't think the ones on your computer will give you the quality your stereo does."

"It's fine," Sebastian said quickly and Ciel turned around to look at him.

"Why do you say that?" Ciel asked.

Sebastian shrugged and then winced. "I can hear better without anything playing," he said carefully.

Ciel didn't say anything at first and a frown worked its way across his lips. He had noticed the past few days that Sebastian hadn't insisted on playing music of any sort and had started to act twitchy. He jumped at the smallest of noises and sounds that Ciel knew didn't exist. The fear of the attack had grabbed Sebastian, clutching him tightly in its grip and making him paranoid.

At first, Ciel could easily brush off the actions. A simple twitch here or a startled noise there. But now Sebastian had resorted to changing certain aspects in his life and Ciel couldn't ignore that as easily. As much as he didn't want to confront Sebastian about it, he felt he needed to reassure him as best he could.

"Sebastian," he started and set the books down. "You're making things harder for yourself, I think. I know you're uneasy and on edge after everything that happened, but you can't let that fear rule you."

Sebastian snorted. "I'm not," he said but his clenched hands spoke otherwise.

Ciel reached for them and held both his hands in a warm embrace. "Then why won't you let yourself listen to the things you love so much? You're denying yourself your music and inspiration. I think it would help with your recovery," he said. At least this way, Sebastian could prove to himself that he could still hear the notes and pitches in everything around him. What better way to show he was all right?

"I can't," Sebastian argued. "If something is playing in the background, I might not hear the sounds that I really need to hear. What if I miss something, like last time? If Soot hadn't heard them first…" He trailed off and let the rest of the sentence hang in the air.

"You won't," Ciel reassured him firmly.

"But I could," Sebastian snapped and Ciel jerked back slightly at the venom in his tone. "I'm not normal. I can't see like everyone else because I have this fucking disability that makes it impossible for me to live normally. I have no choice but to rely on my hearing for everything. I wouldn't even be injured this badly if I wasn't blind. I hate it. I hate being blind," he spat.

Ciel bit his lip as Sebastian's chest heaved for breath and pain flickered across his face with each breath. Crimson eyes appeared glossy and they narrowed in an attempt to keep the emotions at bay. He shifted closer until their knees pressed together. "You don't mean that, do you, Sebastian?"

Sebastian scowled. "Of course I do," he hissed. "You think I like not being able to see everything around me? That I like having everyone staring at me because they pity me. Oh, pity the blind man, the poor thing."

Ciel shook his head. "No, I don't think you do. You've told me yourself how you pity the people who can see and that you like the world you've created inside your mind," he said. "I think you just hate the helpless feeling that you feel now and you're finding anything you can to lash out at it."

"I wouldn't be in this mess if I wasn't blind," Sebastian said coolly. "Because I couldn't see, I couldn't defend myself better. I couldn't flee and I let someone innocent get severely injured because of that."

"You didn't force Soot to do anything," Ciel argued and tried his best to keep his temper. "She attacked them because she wanted to. Because she loves you."

"And look how I repaid her," Sebastian muttered darkly. "She's still hurt and in the hospital, clinging to life, while I jump at every noise and worry about another attack. None of this would've happened if I could see."

Ciel grunted. "So being able to see would've prevented the attack?" he questioned. Sebastian gave a curt nod and Ciel clicked his tongue. "Then what about those of us who can see?"

Sebastian's eyebrows furrowed. "What do you mean?"

"People get attacked every day. Whether they can see or not," Ciel stated. "Their ability to see doesn't prevent an attack anymore than not being able to see. In most cases, people who can see still end up in the hospital after an attack and some are worse for the wear. Their ability to see didn't protect them, so how would being able to see help you?"

"I could've run," Sebastian muttered softly.

Ciel hummed. "But would you have?" he asked. "This is your home and you would want to defend it. The adrenaline gets pumping and you think you can take on three intruders. Even if you could've seen, I believe the outcome would've still happened. Perhaps not this exact outcome, but something similar."

"You don't know that," Sebastian stated.

"No, I don't. But who is to say what could or could've happened? What happened, happened. And you can't change it, no matter how much you wish it," Ciel said gently. "The fact of the matter is that you heard them coming and you prepared for it. You heard what Soot wanted to tell you and you could hear them sneaking about your home. You might be blind, but you're hearing is a superpower, remember?"

His hand trailed up Sebastian's arm, fingers running gently over the soft t-shirt he wore. They traced over the curve of his shoulder and up his neck until they reached Sebastian's ears. He stroked them tenderly, feeling the cartilage that formed a smooth arc and moved down to tug lightly at a fleshy earlobe.

He felt Sebastian lean into the touch and Ciel spread his hand out against his check. "Your ears are amazing, Sebastian. You might not be able to see, but no one else can hear the things you do. No one can hear the song that a thunderstorm sings or capture its melody." Crimson eyes closed and a hot tear slipped across Ciel's fingers. "No one can even begin to imagine the gift you have. You might hate that you can't see, but would you really want to give up all that you can hear just so you can see? The world isn't always a beautiful place, you know."

"I know," Sebastian whispered. "I just… I'm frustrated right now with everything."

"And scared," Ciel said. "For anyone, it's a frightening experience. Being attacked that is. Whether you could see it or not. Your fear is justified."

Sebastian breathed heavily through his nose. "I think that was the first time I was afraid of the darkness around me," he admitted. "I didn't know where they were or what they would do next."

Ciel nodded in understanding. "But you still fought them off and managed to defend yourself." He smiled. "You're an amazing person, Sebastian. Despite everything set against you, you still kept your cool and managed to come out on top."

"They still packed a hard punch though," Sebastian grumbled. "Hippos. The lot of them."

"Hippos?" Ciel asked.

Sebastian's lips tilted up ever so slightly. "I picture them as mini hippos," he admitted.

Ciel laughed and his shoulders shook as his hand slipped away from Sebastian's face. "I like that image," he said. One good thing about Sebastian's blindness, he wouldn't have to see his attackers face in his nightmares or on the streets. The images wouldn't haunt him the way they would someone else.

His laughter quieted and Ciel reached for Sebastian again. "What you said earlier," he started. "That you weren't normal. Don't you ever think that again, Sebastian. I look at you and I see someone normal. Your blindness doesn't subtract anything from your personality or your intelligence. And I pity anyone who thinks otherwise, because they don't have the chance to know you.

"But I know you. I think you're normal and just like everyone else," he continued. "You still eat and drink the way we do. You have to use the bathroom throughout the day. You have your own hobbies and likes that you do. Plus, you can use a computer better than some people I know. And as a guy, you still get awkward morning wood. See, normal."

Sebastian snorted at that but he looked less troubled than before. It made Ciel relax a little, knowing that Sebastian was at least listening to him. He counted that as a victory, even though he knew they would still hit rough patches along the way.

He stood up and brushed his lips over Sebastian's forehead. "You're normal, Sebastian. I promise. I like you for exactly who you are and I wouldn't wish to change anything about you." He paused. "Except for your attention to detail when it comes to displaying your books," he teased.

"Duly noted," Sebastian said. "On everything you said."

"Good," Ciel said happily and reached around Sebastian to adjust the pillows on the couch. "It's a little after two. You should take your meds and try to take a small nap. I know you didn't sleep well last night."

Sebastian grumbled as he accepted the pills that Ciel handed him. "It hurts to sleep. I'm surprised I can even sleep for an hour straight at times."

Ciel helped him maneuver on the couch until he could lie down properly. "An hour or two is better than nothing though. And it gives me a chance to finish shelving these books and figure out dinner."

"Just order in tonight," Sebastian said. "It's Friday. And I don't know about you, but I could go for some Chinese."

"Works for me," Ciel said and brushed away a stubborn piece of hair that clung to Sebastian's face. "I'll be here when you wake up."

Sebastian nodded and his eyes closed. "Ciel," he said quietly. "In my room, I have a drawer in my desk that has several CDs. Can you find the one that's labeled 'The Secret Life of Light_'_? You can use the alarm clock in my room to play it. It has a CD player function."

Ciel bobbed his head and scurried off to find the disc in question. It pleased him to know that Sebastian wanted to listen to his music again and he counted that as a step in the right direction.

He found the collection easily enough, along with stacks of papers filled with notes. The one on the top caught his attention and he recognized the notes as the ones he penned in for Sebastian last month. Sebastian had added more to the composition but the title of it remained blank. Ciel carefully replaced it and sorted through the discs before finding the one he needed.

"Found it," he announced as he brought the small alarm clock out into the living room. It wouldn't provide the best quality compared to Sebastian's original speakers, but it was better than nothing.

He loaded the disc and pressed the play button. It swirled and started to play, the notes starting so faint that Ciel could barely decipher them. They came low and calm, like someone waking from a peaceful and deep sleep.

"Thank you," Sebastian said and Ciel knew what he meant.

The music floated throughout the room and Ciel finally felt that things would go back to normal. Sebastian's apartment without music wasn't normal. It didn't fit and Ciel found himself swaying lightly to the upbeat melody. It carried him away, as the music typically did, and Ciel's heart seemed to grow lighter. The tone was cheerful and playful, and it put an easy smile on his face.

He continued to place the books on the shelves as Sebastian slept. Occasionally, a flicker of pain would cross his face or he would wince in his sleep, but otherwise, Sebastian didn't wake up. With any luck, Sebastian would sleep for a few hours before Ciel had to wake him up. Although, he did look endearing when he slept, eyebrows furrowed ever so slightly.

"You'll end up with wrinkles," Ciel teased him and smoothed out the bridge of Sebastian's nose.

The doorbell rang, making Ciel jump and jerk his hand away. Sebastian barely stirred at the noise and Ciel hurried to answer the door before the doorbell could ring again.

Ciel scowled when he opened it and found Johan standing on the small porch. With Sebastian's small breakdown earlier, Ciel had forgotten that Johan had planned to visit in the afternoon. "Sebastian just fell asleep," he said and debated slamming the door in Johan's face. His fingers tightened around the thick wood. "You'll have to come back."

"I can wait until he wakes up," Johan said.

"Sebastian wouldn't like that," Ciel countered.

Johan gave him an apathetic look. "He already knew I would visit today, so I have trouble believing he would think otherwise," he said. "Besides, I'm here as a friend."

Ciel grumbled under his breath but stepped aside to let Johan in. "Fine. Just behave. Sebastian's not doing all that well right now," he said and shut the door.

Cool eyes fixed themselves upon him. "What do you mean?" Johan asked.

Ciel shifted on his feet, cursing himself for letting that information slip. "He had a small relapse earlier and started to hate that he couldn't see. The attack really rattled him and his confidence," he said. "But I calmed him down and I think he's a little better now."

Johan didn't say anything as he made his way to the couch where Sebastian slept. He stopped next to it and reached down to pull up the blanket that had slipped slightly. Once fixed, he straightened up and gazed at Ciel. "He's only this way now because of you," he said.

"What do you mean?" Ciel challenged. "I helped him."

"I meant that if it weren't for you, they never would've attacked Sebastian to begin with," Johan snapped.

"I had nothing to do with the attack," Ciel growled.

Johan shook his head. "You had everything to do with it," he snarled. "They only came because of your friend. Because you came into the picture and stayed with Sebastian, they sought him out. They targeted him because of you."

Ciel jerked away, the words harsh and stinging, and he struggled to find his ground once more. "I didn't tell them to come and attack Sebastian. I would never do something like that."

"You didn't have to. All you had to do was give them enough reason and they did the rest," Johan spat. "They came and attacked him because they thought he corrupted you. They wanted to protect you. And they never would've found him if you hadn't shown the wolves to Sebastian's door."

"I didn't," Ciel started and he shook his head but it only made his world seem to swim faster. Was he truly responsible for the attack? Alois was his friend –ex-friend now – and through that same vein, it meant that Ciel had to do with part of the attack. After all, he was the one who told Alois where to find Sebastian. "It's not my fault," he said weakly.

Johan crossed his arms. "I believe it is. If you weren't so selfish and demanded to stay with Sebastian when you already had a place to stay, this wouldn't have happened. Your actions led to the attack. Your actions, your friend, your fault."

Desperation welled up inside Ciel and he struggled to fight against it. "That's not true," he nearly shouted. Because if it were, then Ciel was the reason Sebastian had almost ended up deaf and now had trouble coping with the situation. And Ciel couldn't stand to know that.

"It is true," Johan said seriously. "The best thing you can do now is admit it to yourself and beg for forgiveness. You are responsible for this and you know it."

"Johan!" Sebastian snapped from the couch, making them both jump.

Ciel's chest heaved and he struggled to hold back his emotions. Johan's words had struck hard and true, shaking him to the core until Ciel didn't know which way was up or down anymore. The words battered his mind, tossing him about in a maelstrom that threatened to pull Ciel down until he couldn't rise again.

He was responsible.

Those three words made Ciel shudder and he almost crashed to the floor. He steadied himself against the wall and sucked in deep breaths of air, trying to calm his spinning head. It did little to help and the whining pitch had returned to his ears once more.

"Johan," Sebastian repeated, his voice a little calmer. "I'm willing to overlook this because we're all on edge over everything that happened and you're just worried. But you have no right in accusing anyone for anything. This isn't the courtroom. Leave the theatrics for there."

"My thoughts remain my own," Johan stiffly.

Sebastian sighed. "I'm not going to take them away," he said, sounding weary once more. "I know I can't change your mind when you're set on something."

"I'm sorry," Johan said genuinely.

"It's who you are," Sebastian answered and Ciel wondered if they had this conversation before. "It's probably best if you get back to work, Johan."

Johan nodded and squeezed Sebastian's shoulder. "I'm glad you're all right," he muttered before leaving the living room.

The front door shut and Ciel let out a long sigh. But even with Johan's departure, the guilt lingered and lay across his shoulder like yoke. Each ticking second that passed only weighed it down further until Ciel had to brace himself against the wall.

"Ciel," Sebastian called more gently and he stretched out his arm, beckoning him closer.

Ciel hesitated in his spot before he numbly walked over to the couch and grabbed Sebastian's hand. The warm touch offered him an anchor and he clung to it. "I'm sorry," he gasped.

Sebastian made a soothing noise and gingerly rubbed his back. "You did nothing wrong, Ciel," he muttered. "Don't listen to him. You did nothing wrong."

But Sebastian's words and calming touch did little to ease the words that Johan had spoken. Like poison, they pulsed throughout his body, attacking him at his weakest points and tearing down his defenses. They left him bare and helpless to the world until Ciel wanted nothing more than to crawl away and hide from the piercing eyes that glared at him.

Ciel choked back a sob and his body trembled slightly. He was responsible for the attack. He had hurt someone he cared about deeply and it left him feeling worse than scum. In the end, he was no better than Alois. And Ciel hated himself for it.

* * *

**A/N**: Next week is my last week in Japan after living here for two years :( I'll leave for the airport on Tuesday and fly out the next day, so Monday will be a bit hectic with cleaning, goodbyes, etc. I don't think it will have any impact on next weeks chapter but things do happen, so I'm just going to give a heads up that there is a small chance the chapter might be late. I doubt it will be, but knowing my luck, something will happen, haha XD

Until then! I hope everyone has a good week! ^^


	16. Opus 16

**A/N**: Phew, what an exhausting past week XD But everything is done and I leave on Wednesday :3 I'm really excited to post this chapter too, it's one of my favorites ^^ Many, many thanks to **socialbutrfly1379 **for being my amazing beta again! She was awesome working on this story :3

**Warnings**: Language**  
**

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Kuroshitsuji

* * *

Ciel absently stirred the contents in the pan, listening to the peppers sizzle and pop. The aroma filled the kitchen and wafted throughout the apartment, and he found it easy to focus on. The weekend had come and gone, and Ciel moved about it in a daze. Claude likened him to a zombie when he stopped by to visit Sunday evening and Ciel simply flicked him off.

He wholly blamed Johan for putting him in his current state and Ciel jabbed a piece of eggplant in his anger. It squished underneath the spatula and didn't come anywhere near relieving his annoyance.

He clicked his tongue and turned his attention to the pork, making sure it wasn't burning. With how scattered his thoughts were, Ciel didn't doubt that he had a few crispy pieces somewhere in the mix.

Try as he may, he couldn't shake Johan's words. Even with Sebastian reassuring him, Ciel couldn't forget them too easily and they plagued his thoughts throughout the day. Whenever the silence stretched a little too thin, they would come roaring back with the force of a freight train and they started a tiring chase throughout his mind.

Even at night, they kept him awake and Ciel could do nothing but stare at the ceiling. Often times, he would reach for Sebastian's hand only to pull back before he could touch. He had put Sebastian in his current state. One filled with pain and insecurity.

Despite their talk early Friday afternoon, Sebastian still had trouble relaxing. He jumped at sudden noises and occasionally, Ciel would find him staring in the direction of the kitchen. No doubt, replaying that night in his mind and remembering everything. His hands would tremble ever so slightly before Sebastian forced himself to look away.

Ciel took that as a good sign and made sure to keep Sebastian company whenever he could. Mey-rin helped at night when she returned from work and together, they all relearned how to live after the attack. Ciel had no doubt that Sebastian would make a full recovery, both physically and mentally. But he knew that the guilt he felt would never leave him.

It haunted him and crept like a shadow behind him. Whenever he turned, he could see it standing there, attached to his feet and grinning a gruesome grin. It reminded him that he bore the responsibility for the attack on Sebastian.

Despite the heat of the stove, Ciel shuddered and he stirred at the dish even more. The sauce had started to thicken and he waited a few more minutes before turning the heat off. Steam brushed against his face and Ciel waved it away. "I hope you haven't fallen back asleep," he called into the living room.

"You're making too much racket to sleep," Sebastian teased.

"I should let you go hungry tonight," Ciel retorted as he lifted the pan off the stove. He poured the mix over some rice, making sure to split it evenly between the bowls.

Sebastian laughed. "Very well, I'll concede." He paused. "For now."

"Hardy har har," Ciel drawled as he carried the bowls into the living room, but his lips quirked. He passed the bowl to Sebastian and took a seat next to him. "I should charge you for my services."

"Consider this payment for letting you stay with me for the month of June," Sebastian answered. "I never charged you any rent or food fees."

"Point," Ciel muttered and took a bite of rice.

They fell silent as they ate, silverware clinking lightly against the sides of the bowls. The noise joined in with the quiet melody that played from Sebastian's new speakers. Claude had dropped them off over the weekend and with their installment, Ciel felt that perhaps things could start working towards recovery.

Sebastian had taken to listening to his music more often throughout the day and Ciel took that as a good sign. The more Sebastian acted like his old self, the better. Ciel didn't want to see him slip back into the mindset of hating his blindness. He never wanted to see that side of Sebastian again.

It only served to remind Ciel of the mess he had helped create and made the guilt rise even more. Ciel set his bowl down, feeling his appetite wane at the mere thought. He hated the guilt that welled up inside him and threatened to swallow him in a single gulp. He couldn't understand how Sebastian could even sit next to him without detesting him.

Ciel snorted to himself. Not like Sebastian had a choice. He couldn't exactly move very well thanks to Ciel and that severely hampered his daily life. And with Mey-rin gone for most of the day, Sebastian had no choice but to rely on Ciel until he made a full recovery. After that though, Sebastian would ask him to leave.

Not that Ciel blamed him. Through Ciel's actions, Alois and his roommates had attacked Sebastian and left him in his current state. Ciel frowned down at his bowl, glaring at the food even though it didn't deserve his anger. If anything, his reflection deserved that.

He looked up when Sebastian set his dish to the side. "You're not hungry?" Ciel asked, eyeing the remaining food.

"I need to take a small break," Sebastian answered. "I never realized how much those bones play a part in my everyday life. I'm never taking them for granted ever again."

Ciel gave a weak laugh. "Yeah, I bet it's frustrating," he said and poked at the leftover food in his bowl.

Sebastian grunted. "But more than that, this gives us a chance to talk." Ciel looked up at him. "You're not eating either."

"So I'm not," Ciel said and set his bowl in his lap. His heart thumped against his chest, nervousness filling his body. His previous thoughts were about to become reality. Sebastian would tell him to leave because he couldn't stand staying around him after the mess he caused. "You were saying?" he prompted carefully.

"Do you truly believe what Johan said last Friday?" Sebastian asked and Ciel stiffened. "You're acting the same way you did after we came back from the Yards. Skirting around me and acting like a frightened animal. I know something bothers you and it didn't start until after Johan left."

Ciel blinked and rubbed at his eyes. "You could be a new Sherlock Holmes, you know that?" he said and Sebastian's lips quirked briefly.

"I'll take that response as a yes," Sebastian said and rolled his shoulders.

Ciel watched as he twiddled his fingers together, suddenly amazed at how they looked as they circled around each other. He twitched when Sebastian called his name again, his tone imploring. "Yeah," he mumbled. "I know you said I wasn't, but I feel like I am. Alois was my friend and I brought his wrath on you because I couldn't stand staying with him. It was a selfish move on my part to stay with you when I already walked on thin ice with Alois."

Sebastian clicked his tongue. "I believe I was the one who asked you to stay with me, Ciel. That makes me selfish as well. I told you as such when I asked," he said. "I never once blamed you for what happened, nor did I hate you. Things happen."

"But not like this. Not to you," Ciel said forcefully. "You did nothing wrong and yet looked what happened. If we hadn't met, you wouldn't struggle to breathe. You wouldn't feel paranoid and Soot wouldn't still be in the hospital."

"Perhaps," Sebastian said, his hands clenching briefly at the mention of Soot. "But if we hadn't met, where would I be? Still struggling with my work and slaving over an empty staff, surrounded by crushing darkness. I would've remained a bitter individual, slowly turning into a recluse because I couldn't find my muse. Tell me what kind of life that would be for me?"

Ciel fidgeted on the couch. "One better than what you're living now?"

Sebastian shook his head. "I don't think so. I constantly live in the dark, Ciel. But before we met, it had grown deeper because I allowed myself to drift away from everyone. Claude struggled to get me out that depression, as did my other friends. No one could get me to budge. Then you came along and breathed life back into me. You taught me once again how to relax and have fun. In a way, you brought my muse back and helped shed some light in the darkness." He cocked his head and Ciel could see the faintest hint of red on his cheeks. "I like to believe that you saved me from myself. As cliché as that sounds."

Warmth blossomed to Ciel's cheeks as well and he swallowed, trying to keep the hope from erupting in his chest. Sebastian's words battled with Johan's in his mind, each side warring with each other.

"That may be," he said carefully. "But look how I turned around and repaid you. I might've breathed life back into you, but I also stole it back."

Searching hands reached for him and Ciel hesitantly reached out to guide Sebastian's hands. Warm fingers touched against his cheeks and Ciel sighed quietly at the touch. "Who are you to tell me that I should hate you or not?" Sebastian asked. "I believe that choice falls belongs to me, and I'm telling you that I don't hate you."

Ciel squeezed his eyes shut. "But you should," he protested. "Look at what I've done to you."

"You didn't do anything, Ciel," Sebastian corrected. "The people who attacked me did. You didn't tell them to come here and do what they did. You never struck me or harmed me in any way. And you didn't put those thoughts in their minds. They did all those things on their own accord."

"That may be, but I still gave them the ignition point that they needed to start their actions," Ciel claimed.

Sebastian cocked his head in thought. "Did you? How can you know for sure?"

Ciel frowned. "I can't. But in my mind, I believe that I lit their fuse. That I gave them the spark that started burning their thoughts."

For a moment, Sebastian didn't say anything and crimson eyes searched Ciel. They darted across him, sometimes skirting too far to one side, but other times catching Ciel's eyes. "I can't change that part of your mind. If you believe yourself guilty of what happened, I can only do so much to convince you otherwise," Sebastian started. "As far as you believe, you're responsible for what happened."

"Yes," Ciel whispered, his stomach clenching and turning at the words.

Sebastian hummed and his fingers stroked a spot under his eye. "Then, I forgive you, Ciel," he said softly and pulled him closer as best he could. "I forgive you for whatever you believe yourself guilty of. And I ask that you stop torturing yourself so by thinking otherwise. I can't smile and move on if you're struggling with this."

Ciel shuddered at the words and tried his best to grasp them. They bumped against his fingers and he clumsily gripped at them. They offered a sense of warmth and relief that Ciel hadn't felt since Johan's visit. He could feel the cold knot of guilt slowly loosening in the pit of his stomach.

A part of him still believed Johan's words and felt responsible for the attack. Ciel doubted that part would fade away anytime soon and it would take several months before he could come to terms with it. But Sebastian's soothing words helped start the way. It paved the path and made it easier for Ciel to travel down, accepting that Sebastian had a point.

Somewhere, hidden deep under the guilt, stirred a thought and belief that he wasn't responsible. That logical side of him though refused to take flight and stayed weighted down by the oppressing guilt. But Ciel had faith that in time, it would rise again and chase away the last of the poisoning thoughts in his mind.

"Thank you," Ciel whispered and covered Sebastian's hand with his own. "And I am sorry, for all this."

"It's fine," Sebastian murmured and his lips lifted. "Now. Give me a kiss. Otherwise, if I try, I'll end up missing and getting your eye instead."

Ciel laughed, his chest feeling light once more. The remnants of Johan's words still lurked, but they no longer held barbed spikes against him. Instead, they simply lingered, like an itch he couldn't scratch. "I can do that," he said and closed the gap between them.

Sebastian's lips were warm against his, although slightly chapped. But it did nothing to deter him and Ciel moaned into the kiss. If he doubted Sebastian's words before, his tender actions helped chase away any lingering doubt. Sebastian's affection for him was real and in return, so was Ciel's.

Of that, Ciel never had any doubt.

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

"You're doing it again," Ciel said without looking up from the papers spread before him. Multiple notes covered the staff and Ciel tried to decipher the melody in his head, but the tapping of Sebastian's fingers threw him off beat.

"Sorry," Sebastian said and his fingers stilled.

A page turned and Ciel finally looked up at Sebastian. "The tune you keep playing. It sounds familiar." He paused. "What is it to?"

Sebastian's head lowered to look his fingers, and then rose to gaze at Ciel. "It's to a composition I made several years back," he admitted. "It's the same beat that goes to The Secret Life of Light."

"Ah," Ciel said in understanding. Sebastian listed to the disc at least once a day and now that Ciel reflected on the beat of Sebastian's fingers, he could hear the similar tune. "It must be a special composition for you."

"It is," Sebastian said and he hesitated. His eyes flickered around the room, as though looking for a distraction before they settled on his hands once more. "I composed that piece to mimic Soot as best I could. I wanted to capture her in musical notes so I could immortalize her, if you will. I just thought that since she isn't here…"

He didn't need to continue. Ciel understood perfectly. "I think you did a good job with the piece," he said. "But I know nothing will replace the original."

Sebastian shook his head and Ciel turned another page. Soot's recovery crept forward at a maddening pace. But each day that passed, the veterinarian increased her chances for survival. The waiting though drove Sebastian insane and Ciel knew he yearned to see his companion. And with his ribs the way they were, Sebastian couldn't do much to keep himself entertained.

"You should compose something to keep your mind busy," Ciel suggested and smoothed out the new page. His fingers traced over the notes that belonged to the cello. "Perhaps that'll help. Or maybe play something simple on the piano? That's still sitting."

His hands rose and held an invisible instrument as his fingers settled in place on the neck. Slowly, he started to play the notes and hummed the melody in his head. It was a good thing Sebastian couldn't see him right now. He probably looked ridiculous.

"Maybe," Sebastian said. "I have that one that you started last month, but I haven't written much more for it."

"You just need inspiration again," Ciel claimed, although that was easier said than done. His invisible bow moved across silent strings and if Ciel closed his eyes, he could almost feel the weight of the instrument against his shoulder.

Sebastian chuckled. "I can't find it laid up like this," he said. "Perhaps it's just lying in wait. Ready to pounce when I least expect it."

Ciel nodded. "That's usually how it works," he said and his hands fell to his side, his part done. He turned the page. "I wish," he started and then cut himself off, eyes blinking rapidly.

"Yes?" Sebastian prompted.

"Ah, nothing," Ciel said and stood up. His joints protested the sudden movement and popped, but he pointedly ignored them. "I need to make a call real quick."

Sebastian waved a hand. "Help yourself. I could use a nap."

Ciel snickered. "You're going to get lazy if you keep this up."

"Blah, blah," Sebastian drawled and reclined against the pillows. His eyebrows knitted together in brief pain before they smoothed out again.

Rolling his eyes, Ciel grabbed his phone from the coffee table and made his way into Sebastian's room. He shut the door and scrolled through his contacts, hoping they would answer.

The phone rang twice before the person picked up and Ciel smiled. "Hey, Claude. Want to help me with something?"

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

A pleased sigh escaped Sebastian's mouth from the back of the car and Ciel turned around to look at him. "It feels nice to get outside the apartment," Sebastian stated.

Claude chuckled. "And just think, not too long ago I couldn't get you out of the apartment," he teased.

"Oh hush," Sebastian stated and turned his face to look out the window. "It seems like a nice day."

"It is," Ciel answered. "There's not a cloud in the sky, but it's ungodly hot."

Sebastian hummed and closed his eyes. "This is normal for this time of the month," he said and leaned his head against the window. "Where are we going?"

Ciel shook his head. "It's a surprise," he said. "I told you that when we woke up and when we left the apartment. I'm not budging."

"Tease," Sebastian muttered under his breath, and both Ciel and Claude smirked.

The buildings continued to pass by, Claude driving as smoothly as he could to avoid jarring Sebastian on any turns. Ciel wiped his palms on his pants and then smoothed his hands over the papers in his lap. He could see Claude's questioning gaze but he ignored him. Now wasn't the time for self-doubt and he knew they could do this.

He looked out the window as the car pulled into the parking lot and came to a soft stop. "I actually get to use the handicap parking spot," Claude said. "I've always wanted to park here."

Ciel rolled his eyes. "Yes, because the parking lot is so full that you couldn't get a spot."

"Spoilsport," Claude grumbled as they climbed out.

Ciel helped Sebastian out of the car and guided him to the front of the building. "Tell me if you need to take a break," he said as they walked. The most Sebastian walked in a day were a few broken laps around the first floor of the apartment. This would be the most he had walked in one go since the attack.

Sebastian nodded but didn't say anything, too focused on saving his breath. He still had a month and a half before the ribs healed themselves and Ciel could see the frustration painted across his face. He encouraged him gently, making sure not to sound too condescending or pitying.

By the time they reached the front door, sweat had beaded along Sebastian's hairline and they stopped to rest in the shade of the building. "That hurt," Sebastian hissed through his teeth. "But I don't regret it. Feels good to stretch my legs outside."

Ciel nodded. "Maybe after this you and I can walk outside for a while. You need vitamin D after all."

"I agree," Sebastian said. "But with more breaks next time."

They waited a few more minutes for the pain to subside before Sebastian said he was ready. Claude held the door open for them and cool air rushed over them as they walked inside. Ciel sighed in relief and then tensed, realizing he had forgotten the papers. He wheeled around and his shoulders slumped when he saw Claude holding them.

Claude winked at him. "I got them, don't worry."

"Thanks," Ciel said and turned back to Sebastian. "Know where you're at yet?"

"The symphony house," Sebastian said. "I would recognize this smell anywhere."

Ciel chuckled. "Can't pull a fast one on you, can we." He tugged gently at Sebastian's shirt. "This way."

Sebastian followed without complaint, content with his second home surrounding him. His features relaxed as they walked to the grand doors on the first floor. Silence greeted them when they entered the main room, its vast emptiness making every little sound travel throughout the room. Ahead, the tall pipes of the organ gleamed in a welcoming gesture and Ciel's eyes traced the straight lines until they reached the stage.

"Just a few steps," he said and Sebastian climbed onto the stage without much trouble. "And here we are. A nice comfy seat for all your hard work."

A long sigh escaped Sebastian as he took the offered seat. His shoulders slumped and his laugh sounded more like a wheeze than actual laughter. "I'm not moving for a while."

Claude chuckled behind him. "That's fine. We're not leaving for a while either." He pressed a water bottle into Sebastian's hand along with some pain medication. "The kid and I pulled some strings, and we have the place to ourselves until this evening."

Sebastian grunted. "It's Thursday. They don't offer tours on Thursday's." He tossed back the medication. "So I doubt you had to pull those strings too much."

"Hey, don't ruin our victory," Claude stated. "There were some other strings we had to tug in order to get the final part of this surprise. You're lucky everyone likes you so much."

"Oh?" Sebastian asked and cocked his head. "Such as?"

Ciel took a seat across from Sebastian and adjusted the black stand that stood next to the chair. "Remember how I always wanted to hear you play the piano?" he started and Sebastian nodded. "Well, I thought maybe I should return the favor."

His thumb moved lightly across the strings on the cello next to him and the notes vibrated in the air. They played, deep and rich, surrounding them as Sebastian sat up straighter at the noise. It was one thing to listen to music playing on the stereo, but it remained something else entirely to hear someone play it live.

"You're going to play for me?" Sebastian questioned and he sounded hopeful.

"I'm going to try," Ciel said with a laugh as he lifted the beautifully crafted instrument from its stand. The familiar weight rested easily in his hands and he let it lean against his torso. His arms circled around it, embracing it like an old friend. "I haven't played for a while, so you'll have to ignore any mistakes. And promise not to laugh."

Sebastian shook his head, his eyes soft and his features longing. "I would never laugh," he said honestly.

Ciel nodded, the action reassuring himself and he steadied the bow in his hand. "This was the first song I played for my mom," he said, knowing Sebastian would understand the meaning.

The bow touched the strings and Ciel pulled it across, each note reverberating deeply throughout his body. He could feel the vibrations down to the marrow of his bones and his body rocked slightly with the instrument. It was a dance between them, one intimate and familiar, and a smile touched his lips.

His fingers moved up and down the neck, creating each note with harmony and letting them fill the air around them. The notes flowed from the pages on the staff and onto the strings he played. And with each pass of the bow and press of his fingers against the strings, the tune floated from the instrument. Like water, the pattern moved constantly and soothingly.

It let Ciel lose himself as he continued to work the bow. It wasn't his instrument and a small part of him felt awkward holding it, but the cello still responded beautifully to his questioning fingers. It understood his actions and sang each pitch perfectly as they played together in harmony. Only once or twice did he misplay a note and it pitched, but he continued on, never faltering.

His eyes flickered briefly to Sebastian, pleased to see an easy smile on his face. Crimson eyes had closed and Sebastian swayed ever so gently to the music, his fingers playing alongside him on an invisible keyboard.

It encouraged him and Ciel pushed forward. His once nervous fingers confidently manipulated the cello as they continued their dance, rocking in a steady but smooth rhythm. The song caught him up in its arms; sweeping him away to a different place and making him forget all the troubles that plagued his mind.

Here, there was no Alois and his friends, and Sebastian wasn't hurt. The world was simple and had narrowed down to a few pinpoints of interest in Ciel's mind. Namely Sebastian, the cello, and himself. He forgot they were at the symphony hall and not in the comfort of Sebastian's apartment, and he played as though only Sebastian existed.

Because in the end, that was the only person he wanted to play for. Sebastian. Always Sebastian.

The song tapered away and Ciel drew the bow across the strings a final time. The notes lingered in the air, dancing lightly around them until they too faded away and reality settled in once more.

Across from him, Sebastian's eyes opened slowly and Ciel shivered at the spark that burned in crimson eyes. It made Sebastian look alive and determined, ready to face anything that life threw at him. And he had helped create that, had helped fan that tender flame into life.

"Beautiful," Sebastian said softly. "You have great talent with the cello, Ciel."

Ciel laughed lightly and stroked the smooth wood finish on the instrument. "The cello did all of the hard work," he said. "I just followed the notes."

"Regardless," Sebastian said and looked around. "Do they still have the piano on stage?"

"Yeah," Ciel answered and he rested his head lightly against the neck. The strings continued to sing in his ear, encouraging him to play more.

Sebastian stood. "Would you mind turning your solo into a duet?" he asked.

Ciel smiled. "Of course not. I had hoped you would ask that," he admitted. When he first talked to Claude about his plan, they didn't know if Sebastian would willingly play the piano even after Ciel had played his piece. To have Sebastian offer the suggestion first made Ciel grin.

He watched as Sebastian made his way over to the piano and traced a few fingers over the sleek surface. There was something to be said about coming back to an instrument after a long break. It was like meeting an old friend after several years or finding a favorite shirt hidden in the back of the closet. One never quite forgot them – and vice versa – and the elation it brought took a while to fade.

To Sebastian, whose life revolved around music, even a few weeks without playing the piano felt like a lifetime. Therefore, to sit down in front of the piano again, and feel the ivory keys beneath his fingers and hear the familiar notes in his ears, was nothing short of ecstasy. It was like flying and if he let it, it was like a drug. Something that kept him addicted and always searching for the next hit.

Sebastian let out a shaky sigh and Ciel picked up the bow once more. He let it glide across the strings, playing a single note and Sebastian responded instantly.

A smile touched Ciel's lips once more and he started to play. At first, the notes from the piano stayed soft and for a moment, Ciel worried Sebastian had changed his mind. But when he hit the first verse, the melody increased and the notes from both their instruments sang in harmony. The sounds played rich and deep, sending chills down Ciel's spine as they continued to play.

Sebastian matched him perfectly, never once overshadowing the cello or trying to rush the pace. He played simply and beautifully, in harmony with both the piano and Ciel. Through the piano, Ciel could see Sebastian coming alive once more. His hands glided with ease over the dual colored keys, pressing each one perfectly to produce the most stunning sound.

Together, their instruments filled the air around them with serenity. Each one balancing the other in perfect harmony. And even though they never moved from their chairs, they danced together – spinning around and letting the notes carry them away along the current of the staff.

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

Ciel reached out and pressed his hand against Sebastian's leg to keep it from bouncing up and down. He could feel the muscles twitch underneath his hand and he quickly gripped Sebastian's other leg. "That's probably not good for your leg," he warned.

"Can't help it," Sebastian said.

He sighed and patted Sebastian's knee. "Just be patient. They'll call us back soon enough."

"I've been patient," Sebastian muttered but his legs stopped twitching so much. "Two weeks without her is too long in my book."

Ciel hummed and flipped through a magazine. He didn't say anything as Sebastian already remained tightly wound since the call early that morning. The veterinarian had finally released Soot from critical condition to stable and said that Sebastian could come see her. They wanted to keep her for at least a few more days to ensure nothing happened, but Sebastian didn't need any more encouraging.

It was a good way to start the day after an equally wonderful night spent together. If Ciel did say so himself. Their duet at the symphony hall lasted for a few hours and Sebastian's spirit had lifted. It remained throughout the night, letting them both sleep soundly for the first time since the attack and led to a lazy morning in bed.

"Sebastian Michaelis?" They both looked up and Ciel helped Sebastian to his feet. The last thing he needed was Sebastian injuring himself in his rush to see Soot. The technician looked over them, noting the cane at Sebastian's side and he cleared his throat. "This way please."

The technician led them down the hallway and Ciel kept a firm grip on Sebastian's arm. Despite the cane, he didn't want him running into anything.

"We're glad that Soot pulled through," the man said. "The first week was really touch and go, but she's a tough cat."

"She is," Sebastian answered.

They stopped in front of a door that led to a room labeled 'cat ward'. "Right, she's just in here with a few other cats. You can go on in and oh," he stopped and the technician shifted awkwardly. "I can umm, take her to you if want."

Ciel chuckled. "It's fine, he can find her," he said and gave Sebastian a gentle shove. "Go on."

Sebastian stepped into the room and called Soot's name. Ciel followed a few steps behind, a smile on his face. He had no doubt that Sebastian would find Soot without their help.

A few of the cats mewled as they passed but Sebastian ignored them in favor of a loud, demanding cry further down the row. Without hesitation, he made his way to the column of cages and gingerly knelt down in front of a cage. The cries grew louder and Sebastian placed his hand against the wire door. "There's my girl," he muttered.

Soot mewled and cried again, nuzzling her head against Sebastian's hand as best she could. Her tongue roughly laved his fingers and her body practically vibrated with the force of her purrs.

Next to Ciel, the technician shook his head. "I'll be damned," he said. "He actually found her without problem."

Ciel smirked. "They have that special connection. He can hear and find her anywhere," he said.

"I believe that," the man said. "I don't think I've seen her respond so well before. She looks like a brand new cat. That's really something."

"Can I open the door?" Sebastian asked, drawing their attention to him.

The technician nodded. "For a little bit. Just don't lift her up to be on the safe side."

Sebastian's eyes lit up and he reached for the lock. If possible, Soot's cries grew louder and Sebastian chuckled. "Yes, I hear you. Just wait a minute you impatient creature." Soot fell silent for a measly second before she mewled again as the door cracked open.

Ciel laughed. "You can't win with her."

"That's fine," Sebastian said and reached inside the cage. Soot met him halfway, guiding his hand as she always had and Sebastian lovingly rubbed her ears. "That's my smart and brave girl."

Soot gave a strange cry - one mixed with a purr that made it vibrate in her throat - and placed her paws on Sebastian's thighs. She stretched out to reach him and Sebastian leaned over until their heads bumped together. She gave a little chirp and tilted her head to nuzzle his cheek, purring happily all the while.

Sebastian's hands brushed down her shoulders and his eyes squeezed shut, wetness appearing at the corners. "Oh, Soot," he whispered. "I missed you so much. So very much."

She voiced her agreement with a soft noise and Ciel's chest ached as he struggled to keep his emotions under control. He swallowed thickly as Sebastian's lips brushed over the top of her head in a loving gesture.

"I'll always love you," Sebastian murmured and Ciel rubbed at his eyes, furiously blinking back the tears.

He always found it amazing at how simple those few words were. Yet, many people tossed them around in a casual manner, never knowing their true weight and disregarding their meaning. However, they resounded strongly when spoken with true affection and emotion. Creating an unbreakable bond that could transcend time.

* * *

**A/N**: It needs to be said - because it's important to me, lol - but this is the last chapter (or story for that matter) that I'll post in Japan. From next week on, everything will be posted back home and it's really bittersweet for me. With the exception of 'Forgotten Birthday', all my Kuroshitsuji stories were written and posted in Japan. I've written over 1.5 million words during my time here and I'm kind of proud of that, haha.

So this chapter means a lot to me and it means so much to me as well to have the amazing support that y'all have given me during my time here. I truly cannot thank everyone enough.

That said, this is **_not_, I repeat _not_,** the last chapter. We still have a few more to go, haha. Until next Monday! I hope everyone has a great day/week ^^


	17. Opus 17

**A/N**: I'm back! Haha. It's good to be back home :3 Things have been a bit hectic still so I'm pretty far behind answering reviews and other messages. I'm working on them and I promise to get them all answered soon! Thank you everyone for your support and for safe travel wishes ^^

Many, many thanks to **socialbutrfly1379 **for being my amazing beta again! She was awesome working on this story :3

**Warnings**: Language, **homophobic slurs** **  
**

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Kuroshitsuji

* * *

The setting sun cast long streaks of light throughout the living room. They bounced off a small glass mobile and sent faint rainbows darting to and fro across the carpet. A few lines arched along the walls and Ciel lazily traced them with his eyes.

A page turned next to his ear and he blinked at the noise. The quiet crinkle of paper against careful fingers followed by a scrape against the fabric of Sebastian's shirt. The living quieted again and Sebastian's hand came down to rest on his head once more. Gentle fingers threaded through Ciel's hair and he sighed softly.

"Hmm?" Sebastian made a questioning noise.

"Just sighing to sigh," Ciel said and tilted his head so Sebastian could reach another spot.

"Hopefully it's a good sigh," Sebastian said lightly.

Ciel's eyes slipped shut. "It is," he said honestly. "I'm nice and content right now."

Sebastian chuckled. "That's good to know," he admitted and turned another page. "I worried that perhaps I had ruined your Friday evening. Staying in and doing nothing isn't the most pleasant way to spend the night I assume."

"It's fine," Ciel said. He turned carefully and rolled onto his other side to catch Sebastian's hand. He pressed a tender kiss to the palm and then nuzzled it, feeling his lips tug into a smile. "I like getting the chance to spend time with you. Even if it's just lounging around the apartment and doing nothing."

"You sound like a sentimental sap," Sebastian teased.

Ciel grunted and flicked Sebastian's leg. Despite the three weeks that had passed since the attack, Sebastian's ribs had yet to finish healing. Elizabeth told them that it would take anywhere from four to eight weeks for a full recovery. Ciel hoped for a speedy recovery, but with the tender way Sebastian moved at times, he assumed that it would take a full eight weeks.

"I don't hear you complaining," Ciel stated.

"Never said I was," Sebastian responded airily. "I just like ruffling your feathers. It paints an endearing picture in my mind."

Ciel huffed and grumbled under his breath but didn't say anything else. Instead, he watched as Sebastian started to read again, his fingers skimming rapidly over the raised print. He found it interesting and far cooler than he probably should. Braille looked like an entirely different language, even though it was still English.

The dots formed something that Ciel couldn't even fathom and he likened them to the Asian characters he saw periodically. To him, they looked incomprehensible – nothing but squiggles and lines that somehow formed an entire language – yet to others, they made perfect sense. He supposed it was the beauty of languages and that it only served to give them an air of mystery.

Although, at least with the languages that used Roman characters, Ciel could attempt to pronounce the words. Albeit, he would probably butcher the words in every possible way.

"I think you read as fast as I do," he said and Sebastian's fingers sputtered to a halt. Ciel hurried to correct himself. "I mean that as a compliment, of course."

"It's the only thing I know," Sebastian said. "Just as reading printed words is the only thing you know. I imagine it's the same for people who are deaf or speak another language."

Ciel hummed. "I was just thinking that," he admitted. "But I'm still in awe with it. Not just watching you read, but for people who use sign language too. It's all so…cool. You're cool."

"Why thank you," Sebastian said happily. "I like to think that I am, too."

Ciel rolled his eyes and watched as Sebastian started to read again. He wondered what it was like, to pull information from mere dots that littered a page. He remembered studying about Braille and Helen Keller in third grade. His teacher had them create the Braille alphabet on their own using dots of glue and then trying to read small words. He didn't recall the words or even the feel of the Braille under his fingers; only that his dots had clumped together at points when he used too much glue.

But how many times had his fingers ghosted over the Braille that he found throughout his college? They sat directly under the printed numbers and Ciel had seen them often enough but never took the time to think much on it.

He scoffed at himself. "And I only speak Spanish," he muttered. "Everyone speaks Spanish."

Sebastian's eyes danced with mirth. "You can't speak Braille, Ciel," he said. "And if you ask me, I think it's cool that you can understand a foreign language. Even cooler than my ability to read Braille. I read it because I need to, not because I just wanted to learn on a whim."

Ciel shook his head. "I still think you're awesome."

"We both are," Sebastian corrected and tweaked Ciel's nose. "But you'll be even more awesomer if you get the ice cream from the fridge."

"Awesomer isn't a word," Ciel said.

Sebastian shrugged. "It could be. It's listed under the 'A' column in 'The Complete Dictionary of Sebastian-isms'."

Ciel stared at Sebastian. "Now you're just lying and being silly," he said.

"Am I?" Sebastian asked and quirked an eyebrow. He gently pushed at Ciel's shoulder and stood up carefully. He disappeared into his bedroom and returned a few minutes later with his laptop. "Here we are," Sebastian said and took a seat again.

Skillful fingers quickly navigated the computer and pulled up a word document. Ciel stared in awe at the screen, his eyes darting over the vast amount of words that filled the pages. "You weren't lying," he said and located the word in question. "Awesomer; adjective. Used when the situation becomes so grand that proper grammar cannot suffice to describe the current condition. Sample sentences include," he read aloud.

"I was rather proud of that dictionary," Sebastian said.

"Were you just so bored one day that you sat down and wrote these?" Ciel questioned, looking at the next page. "There's a lot in here."

Sebastian shook his head. "One of my English teachers in high school had us make these," he explained. "We had to give each of the words a grammatical point along with a detailed definition and a few sample sentences. It was interesting, to say the least."

Ciel snorted with laughter at one of the definitions. "Drowneded; verb. Usually used when the speaker begins to talk so fast that the grammar and speech patterns don't connect with the tongue. Thus leading to adding an extra –ed when speaking and leading to an even more awkward facepalm while everyone laughs." He wiped a tear from his eye. "Did that really happen?"

"Sadly yes. I kept adding the extra 'D' sound and actually made milk come out of Claude's nose." Sebastian chuckled. "It's an inside joke now between us. Good times."

Snickering, Ciel continued to move through the document. It was a strange way to spend a Friday night and not at all how Ciel envisioned he would spend his summer. But he couldn't complain and right now, Ciel wouldn't want it any other way.

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

Tension filled the car and Ciel shifted uneasily as the vehicle pulled into the parking lot. Johan cut the engine smoothly and Ciel scrambled out of the car before the awkwardness could smother him. He wished that anyone else could've taken them to the veterinarian hospital to pick up Soot that Saturday afternoon, but Johan seemed determined to get back in Sebastian's good graces.

If Sebastian felt the tension that surrounded them, he didn't say anything. Perhaps it was just that he chose instead to focus on finally bringing Soot home that he couldn't bring himself to care. Not that Ciel could blame him, but it still irked him that Johan of all people had to volunteer his services.

He jumped when a hand landed on his shoulder and fingers gripped it tightly. "A word, please?" Johan asked and Sebastian stopped ahead of them. "We'll meet you inside, Sebastian," he called.

Sebastian gave Johan a look, one that clearly told him to behave himself, and continued on. Ciel grunted, slightly annoyed that Sebastian had left him to the wolves but he turned to look at Johan. "What do you want?"

Johan stared at him, unimpressed. The unwavering gaze made Ciel want to squirm uneasily and he tried his best to hold his ground. "I want to…apologize," he said finally. He shoved his hands into his pockets. "What I said two weeks ago was uncalled for."

"I'll say," Ciel muttered.

"It just seemed to right to blame you," Johan continued, pretending he hadn't heard Ciel's comment. "Sebastian is a close friend. Hell, he was my boyfriend. And despite what you may think, I did care for him. I still do."

Ciel swallowed and pushed the thick lump in his throat back down. "You had your chance," he said, hoping his voice didn't waver. He knew Sebastian wouldn't take Johan back, but it still made him uneasy to know that Johan continued to harbor strong feelings for Sebastian.

Johan glanced up at the sky. "I know. Trust me, I know. But it never meant that I loved him any less. That was part of the reason why I agreed we should see other people." He shrugged at Ciel's stare. "I wasn't going to change, Ciel. We both knew that. In the end, leaving was the lesser of two evils. It still hurt, but it would only hurt more to keep holding out for hope that wouldn't come."

"I suppose," Ciel mumbled and toed the ground. He still thought that Johan had his priorities wrong but who was he to judge a person on how they wanted to live their life? His loss meant Ciel's gain.

"But as he's my close friend and my ex, you understand why I felt the need to blame you," Johan pressed. "Were the position reversed, you would probably do the same."

Ciel grunted. "Probably, I guess." He couldn't say for sure, but he had an inkling that Johan had a point. As humans, they struck out at the closest person they believed responsible when the hurt or panic grew too strong. It helped to cover the fear that gripped them and proved better than standing still.

Johan held out his hand. "Apology accepted?"

Ciel eyed the offered hand and clasped it after a few moments of hesitation. "Know that I'm only doing this for Sebastian's sake. He cares for you too and I think he's tired of the petty squabbling that arises whenever we get together."

"I can deal with that," Johan admitted. "Because to tell the truth, I still don't like you."

Ciel gave a stiff grin. "At least that's one thing we agree on." Their hands fell to the side and Ciel looked towards the front doors. "We should probably go inside before Sebastian thinks we murdered each other out here."

"Agreed," Johan said and they headed towards the entrance.

They found Sebastian waiting for them, Soot's carrier sitting on his lap while she nuzzled and laved his fingers through the wire door. "Are you two done kissing and making up?" he asked.

Ciel blanched. "Ugh, Sebastian. Don't even suggest that I would kiss that creature. We just ate lunch." He made a gagging sound. "I don't think the staff would appreciate regurgitated curry and naan bread on their clean floor."

"Yes," Johan drawled as he picked up the carrier. "Because that detailed description you gave wasn't gag worthy enough."

Ciel flicked him off before helping Sebastian to his feet. "I seriously don't know how you dated him."

Sebastian chuckled. "He's quite charming when he wants to be." He squeezed Ciel's hand. "But that means nothing now."

"That's good to know," Ciel answered as they walked back to the car. He could hear Soot crying loudly for Sebastian and he couldn't help but roll his eyes and shake his head. He already knew that they wouldn't leave the apartment after this. Sebastian would be too busy fawning over the cat to do anything.

He sighed as they climbed back into the car and Sebastian shushed Soot. He supposed Sebastian's eccentric behavior regarding cats was just another part of his personality and he found that he wouldn't want to change it. Sebastian wouldn't be Sebastian without his love for the felines. No matter how much that adoration bothered his allergies.

Ciel smiled at his reflection in the window as they drove away from the veterinarian hospital. He was glad to have Soot back though. It meant that Sebastian's life could continue along the road to recovery. Soot's return only helped propel the motion forward, making their home complete once more. His grin faded slightly and Ciel looked at Sebastian through the windows reflection.

Soot may have returned to make Sebastian's family complete, but where did that leave Ciel? He lived at the apartment now, but in less than a month, he would have to go back home. What would happen then?

He had pointedly ignored his inevitable return for weeks, ever since their first kiss. But now he couldn't shake the nagging thoughts that made themselves known. He didn't live here and at one point, he would have to return home. And what happened after that?

Would they try for a long distance relationship? Or would they just go back to being friends? The latter made his heart clench and Ciel tried his best to ignore it. But his logical side curled around him, reminding Ciel that long distance relationships rarely worked out. There were a few who trumped the odds, but Ciel didn't want to risk that chance.

He couldn't ask Sebastian to move north for him. Sebastian already had a life and steady job where he was now. Uprooting Sebastian to have him move would throw off everything he had memorized during his time here. Ciel didn't know how long it took him to memorize routes and the layout of his apartment. He would have to leave the familiar behind and go into something wholly blind. Pun not intended.

Furthermore, Sebastian would need to leave behind all his contacts and start with nothing. He would know no one but Ciel and he didn't think that was all too fair for Sebastian. Not only that, but Ciel didn't know much about his own future aside from graduate school. He hadn't settled on a college and had temporarily moved back with his parents until he picked a place.

Too many things stood stacked against them. The thoughts tumbled around in his mind, battering against each other and his skull. It made a headache blossom between his eyes and Ciel rubbed the bridge of his nose, hoping to soothe it.

The car came to a stop, jerking him from his thoughts and Ciel looked at the apartment through the window. The familiar brick façade greeted him and Ciel's eyes traced the gentle slopes of the railing that framed the steps. It felt like coming home despite having only stayed there close to two months. He had grown to call Sebastian's apartment home.

He climbed out and then slammed the door shut, letting Johan carry Soot's carrier. His mind had started to race again, pondering a new thought that had appeared. If Sebastian couldn't move north with him, what stopped Ciel from moving south with Sebastian?

A shiver raced down his spine at the thought and Ciel let himself entertain the idea, sorting through the different angles. He wasn't in the same position as Sebastian. He had his friends, yes, but they had drifted apart throughout the years. Everyone had gone off in different directions – as people tended to do in life – and aside from his family, Ciel didn't have anything else back home.

If Sebastian didn't mind, then what more held him back? Ciel couldn't think of anything and he bounced lightly on his feet. He would need to research a few things before he approached Sebastian with the idea, but he felt positive things would work out.

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

"You know," Claude said as they walked through a hallway. "You don't have to do this."

Ciel shook his head. "No, I do. I owe it to him to talk with him." He shrugged. "And as cruel as it sounds, I want to hear him admit that I was right."

Claude clicked his tongue. "I don't think you'll get him to say that, kid." They stopped in front of a door. "People like him and his friends don't go around changing their beliefs over something like this. The one perp, McMillan, his father praised him for what he did. Even though his kid is in jail. He thinks his son did a great job eliminating the filth from the street."

Ciel ground his teeth together. "Alois was never like that before. I swear he wasn't."

"People change. Once upon a time everyone thought the world was flat and the center of the universe," Claude said. "Now look where we are. People fall victim to the bandwagons around them, even if it's a wagon full of rotten fruit. You can't stop them from jumping into it any more than you can push them out."

"I know," Ciel said and let out a frustrated sigh. "I just wish," he trailed off and gestured helpless.

Claude placed a hand on his shoulder and gave it a comforting squeeze. "You tried your best, Ciel. You know that and you can't beat yourself up over it. You were a good friend, still are actually, and I think it's a shame that he wasted all that you had to offer."

Ciel smiled up at Claude. "Thanks, Faustus," he said and punched him lightly in the arm. "You're not so bad after all."

"Brat," Claude said gruffly but ruffled his hair. He composed himself the next minute and cleared his throat. "You'll get about ten minutes in there. I'll be right here when you finish. Hold strong and don't let anything he says get to you."

"Will do," Ciel muttered and stepped into the room. He winced at the bright lighting that filled the room and the equally bright orange uniforms. Uneasily, he made his way to the far wall lined with transparent glass and telephones. He took a seat at the number ten booth and stared at Alois who sat on the other side of the glass. Orange really didn't suit him.

They picked up the phones and Ciel stuck his free hand under the short table in front of him. His fingers trembled slightly and he didn't want Alois to see his nervousness. He swallowed and tried to give a small smile to make things easier for them.

"So," he started, unsure how best to go about their conversation.

Alois scowled. "Did you come here to gloat?" he asked. "To shove all my mistakes and misfortunes in my face?"

Ciel shook his head. "No. I wouldn't do that. I came here because I had hoped to talk about everything that happened."

"So talk."

"Uh, how are you doing?"

"Peachy," Alois spat. "My mom can't stop crying whenever I talk to her and my dad just plain refuses. Said he's embarrassed with my actions and that maybe this little detour in life will help straighten me up. Whatever that means. I'm already straight as can be but it's you who is bent a little to the side, aren't you, Ciel?"

Ciel rolled his eyes. "So what if I am, Alois?" he asked and held Alois's eyes. "What if I am gay? What's wrong with that?"

Alois looked disgusted at the thought. "I knew that fag did something to you. He's corrupted your mind so much that you don't know right from wrong."

His grip on the phone tightened and it took everything in Ciel's control not to leave. "Who are you to say what's right and wrong, Alois? What if people who are straight are actually the wrong ones? Who is to say that? No one has that right," he snapped.

Alois opened his mouth to protest and Ciel slammed his hand down on the counter. On the other side of the glass, Alois jumped at the sudden and violent action, and Ciel felt his lips twist into a snarl.

"I'm going to tell you this now, Alois. Sebastian didn't turn me gay, as you so intelligently believe. I knew I was gay when I left for college but didn't tell anyone because I feared this reaction. And yeah, I lost my virginity to a guy. Not some female with big breasts." He shook his head. "Think what you might, but no one corrupted me. Especially not Sebastian."

Ciel panted heavily, shoulders heaving and heart racing. It felt good to get the truth off his chest and tell Alois one of his biggest secrets. He doubted telling Alois the truth would make anything better or worse between them. Alois had already accepted what side he stood for and it was obvious that they weren't going to see eye to eye.

Alois shuddered. "You mean this whole time?" he asked. "This whole time I was friends with a queer?"

A snort escaped Ciel's mouth. "I guess you were." He shrugged. "And it looks like this whole time I was friends with a homophobe."

"I think I'm going to be sick," Alois whispered and buried his face in his hand. "I can't, I don't even. Oh God, that's just disgusting. You're fucking disgusting, Ciel."

Ciel gave a weak smile, trying to ignore how the words still hurt. Foolishly, he had clung to the hope that maybe Alois could come to terms with everything after finding out about his sexual preference. That maybe his friendship with Ciel could overcome his blinded disgust and he could set aside his feelings. But that wasn't going to happen. Alois remained too far set in his ways to budge. As did Ciel.

And as it was, he couldn't – and wouldn't – forgive Alois for what he did to Sebastian. Their friendship had ended the night he willingly allowed his friends to attack Sebastian. But it still didn't stop Ciel from hoping that Alois could make a change for the better in the end.

"I can't change who I am, Alois," Ciel said. "And you're not going to change either, I can see that now."

"Damn straight," Alois growled. "People like you and Sebastian corrupt our society. You and your queer friends are nothing but sick people. It's not normal. Fucking homos."

Ciel sighed. "I'm sorry that it came down to this, Alois. I had hoped that you would be a little more accepting of the world around you." He clutched the fabric of his pants. "Maybe your father had a point. Maybe the time here will do you some good."

Alois scoffed. "Oh sure, side with the fucker. What do you know though? Nothing! Because you're a fag." His eyes narrowed. "Get out of here, Ciel. This is all your fault anyway. I don't want to see you anymore and risk having your disease riddled touch infect me as well. I'm the normal one here, not you. I don't deserve to be behind these bars, you do. You and all your queer friends."

A guard appeared behind Alois and grabbed his upper arm, telling him to behave. Ciel stood up and waved the guard down. "It's okay," he said. "I was just leaving." He looked at Alois and their eyes met for the last time. He knew that the moment he turned around, they would never see each other again. "Goodbye, Alois," he said firmly and hung up the phone.

He turned on his heel, keeping his eyes firmly glued to the door so he wouldn't turn around. He kept his head held high and his shoulders squared so Alois couldn't see the pain the resonated deeply throughout his body. It twisted his face and he bit his lip to fight back the emotions. He hated that they appeared in the corners of his eyes. He hated that he felt like crying for ending such a broken friendship. Hated that he felt like crying for Sebastian's attacker.

But despite everything, Alois was his childhood friend and severing that bond wasn't easy. Even after everything that had happened, Ciel had continued to cling to the hope that everything might turn right in the end. Ultimately though, Alois was the one who burned the bridge first. Ciel simply needed to finish destroying the last remaining part.

Claude met him on the other side of the wall and carefully guided him to a nearby bench. "Hey," he soothed and handed him a tissue. "It's okay. Let's get you back to Sebastian, okay?"

Ciel nodded and let Claude take him by the crook of his elbow. Blindly, he stumbled out to the car and slumped against the sun warmed seats. "That hurt," he said after several minutes.

"Goodbyes usually do," Claude admitted as he continued to drive. He passed him a box. "Here. I have a donut left over from this morning."

Ciel looked at the box and unbidden, started to laugh. He accepted it, shoulders shaking with mirth that only increased when he opened the box. "You are a stereotypical cop after all," he said between breaths. The laughter helped temporarily chase away the pain and Ciel struggled to eat the donut without bursting into uncontrollable laughter again.

It took him nearly the entire car ride to eat the single donut and his stomach ached from laughing so much. He did his best to thank Claude for everything without breaking into laughter again and entered the apartment with a smile on his face.

Sebastian's voice greeted from the living room, along with a loud cry from Soot, and Ciel made his way to the room. He wasn't surprised to see Soot curled up on Sebastian's lap. "How did it go?" he asked and set the book aside.

Ciel flopped down next to him. "As well as it could've I guess. All things considering." He looked at his hands. "He said he didn't want to see me anymore."

"I'm sorry," Sebastian said sincerely.

"He wasn't going to change and neither was I. Plus I couldn't forgive him for what he did to you," Ciel muttered and leaned his head against Sebastian's shoulder. "We couldn't get over our differences and beliefs. I knew that but it still hurts."

Sebastian nodded. "He was your friend despite everything. You did everything you could to keep things patched together and afloat. But you can only do so much." He looked out the window. "In any type of relationship - be it friend, company, or romantic - they are two sides. One side cannot do all the work. They can try, but inevitably, the relationship will become strained and fail."

Ciel sighed and closed his eyes. "I know. And maybe eventually I'll feel like I did the right thing, but right now, I just feel lost."

"That's normal," Sebastian said. "I believe it's a testament to how strongly you felt for Alois, friend wise. Not to say that Alois didn't feel the same at one point, but his feelings might've changed with the different influences around him."

"You can say that again," Ciel muttered and Sebastian pressed a kiss on his ear. "Little more to the left," he said, voice quivering with restrained laughter. Sebastian nipped his ear in retaliation, sending Ciel into peals of laughter again.

Sebastian growled. "Come here you," he said and pulled Ciel to him.

Their lips crashed together, silencing Ciel's chortles and effectively chasing away the upsetting thoughts that lingered in Ciel's mind. His hands came up to thread through Sebastian's hair, better aligning their mouths together for a sensual kiss. Warm and tender hands skimmed down his sides, telling Ciel what Sebastian couldn't say in words. And the loving actions only made Ciel certain that he made the right choice in not trying to change himself.

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

Two days later, Ciel woke up to Soot's insistent crying. He tried batting her away but she persisted and ran a rough tongue against his cheek. Ciel's eyebrows furrowed and he buried his face in the pillow. "Sebastian," he groaned. "Tell Soot that it's Friday morning and I want to sleep in."

The sheets rustled next to him and a little while later, Sebastian lifted Soot away from him. "Come on you hungry monster," he teased her. "Let's feed you so us humans can get some more sleep."

Ciel grunted his agreement and listened to Sebastian walk away. They had stayed up late last night, gingerly exploring each other's bodies with heated touches until Sebastian's ribs protested the heavy breathing. Ciel knew they shouldn't have pushed, but Sebastian reassured him that it was worth it and the pain would fade quickly.

He rolled onto his side as Sebastian entered the room and shut the door. "She's like a child," Ciel stated as Sebastian climbed back into bed. He wiggled closer, pressing his body up against Sebastian's taller one and let his hands trace down his back.

"Some days it feels like it," Sebastian admitted as he shifted under the covers for a more comfortable spot. "That's okay, though. I love her no less."

Ciel nodded and his fingers came up to tease the fine hairs at Sebastian's nape. "I don't want to go home," he said quietly in the silence.

Sebastian's eyes closed. "I don't want you to go home either, but I'm sure your parentals wouldn't appreciate it if I kidnapped you," he teased.

"What if you didn't kidnap me and I just stayed here?" Ciel asked.

"You have a plane ticket already, Ciel," Sebastian stated. "And everything you own is back north."

Ciel swallowed. "I know that. But I could always, you know, move down here." He looked up at Sebastian through his eyelashes. "Other than my parents, I have nothing else back home. Everything I want now is here, with you."

Sebastian sucked in a deep breath and Ciel worried his lower lip. "Ciel," he started. "As much as I like the sound of that, you and I both know that it's not possible. You have graduate school to worry about and I'm not about to let you skip that."

Ciel shook his head. "But I've looked," he protested. "I did all the research on your computer the past week or so. There's a college just thirty minutes north of here that has a master's program for engineering. I can apply for the winter term and I wouldn't miss anything. I'm happy here, Sebastian. I know this will work."

A long sigh left Sebastian and he reached for Ciel. "Ciel," he murmured and drew their foreheads together. "I'm sure it would work. I know you could get into any college you wanted, but I know that college isn't your first pick. It's not the best program that the country has to offer. You told me yourself that the one in your state is the best."

"But a college is a college," Ciel stated. "Anyone will accept my master's degree, no matter what college it came from."

"That may be, but you'll probably find better employment opportunities through the better school." He pushed a finger to Ciel's lip. "Listen to me, Ciel. I want nothing more than to tell you to do this and it's taking everything I have to tell you no. Do you know why?"

Ciel frowned. "No. I don't understand the problem."

Sebastian pecked his nose. "There's no immediate problem, per se. Rather the problem comes from something else." His fingers skimmed down Ciel's chest and came to rest on the curve of his hip. "I'm trying to think about your future. In honesty, we've only known each other for two months now. That's a short time for you to base such a life-changing event on. If something happens between us and we have a falling out of any kind, you're stuck with a degree from a less than admirable college because we were selfish. You'll resent yourself and that choice, because you could've had better but you didn't go for that, too blinded by your desires."

"But that's two years that I won't see you," Ciel whispered, ignoring the nagging voice that said Sebastian made an extremely valid point. "I know what I feel, Sebastian. And long distance relationships rarely work out."

"Ciel," Sebastian cooed. "I have to be the mature one here, despite what I want. I would hate myself if I let you do this and if I allowed you to settle for less because of me. I want you to succeed in life, be it with or without me. And you'll have a better chance with that if you go to your first choice college. Don't throw away your life because of me."

Ciel huffed. "Why do you have to be so mature?" he whined and buried his face in Sebastian's chest. "Stop countering my plan with solid logic and facts."

Sebastian smiled slightly. "Trust me, it's not easy being the mature one. I want nothing more than to kidnap you and make you stay here. But I know you have your heart set on that college. It's what you want and I want you to take that. Take what you want. I'll always be here and I can always wait, but your education can't."

"That's two years though," Ciel groaned. He looked up and gave Sebastian a look. "And don't start sprouting any more mature thoughts. You little dream crusher."

The name made Sebastian laugh outright and he gave Ciel a chaste kiss. "Then you might not like what I'm about to say next," he warned. "Think of these two years as a…test of sorts. You say you're determined to stay with me now but that could just be your puppy love speaking. Once your emotions settle down, you may think otherwise."

Ciel snorted. "I highly doubt that."

Sebastian grinned. "That's just your emotions speaking again," he teased before sobering. His eyes grew serious and he cupped Ciel's cheek. "I'm not saying that I don't want you anymore but that I don't want to ruin your future by tying you down. You could meet someone at graduate school that you realize is a much better match than me."

Ciel shook his head. "I won't," he declared and jabbed Sebastian's arm. "You're not being fair."

"Life rarely is," Sebastian said honestly.

"What do we do then?" Ciel whispered.

Sebastian's fingers brushed against Ciel's cheeks. "We'll take everything day by day," he answered. "It's the only thing you can do. Nothing limits how we can talk and I can always come visit you or vice versa. If this is something we both truly want, I believe we can make it happen. You have to trust that we can make it through this. It's not as though we're several time zones apart. Only an hour."

Ciel grumbled. "But it's several thousand miles apart."

"With technology, it'll seem like I'm right there next to you," Sebastian soothed. "But I'm not letting you give up what you want for the future on account of me. I know you'll regret it."

Ciel fell silent, knowing Sebastian was right. He had debated for a while about giving up his first choice college in order to go to a different one. He yearned for the program his first college offered, knowing that it would push and challenge him. Without that, Ciel would probably grow frustrated with the slow and lax program, and the frustration would eventually lead to discontent towards Sebastian.

He sighed and closed his eyes. He hated and liked that Sebastian could act mature when needed. It showed that Ciel still had some more growing up to do. "Thank you," he muttered. At least Sebastian had stayed adamant about his choice. In the end, it benefited them both, even if it was something they didn't particularly like to begin with.

Sebastian's lips brushed across his forehead. "We have a week and a half before you go home," he said softly. "Let's just enjoy the remaining time together and then look forward to the next meeting. The months will go by faster than you think."

"I know," Ciel said pressed closer. His legs intertwined with Sebastian, keeping him close. Their talk hadn't gone like he thought, but hope remained for the future. Sebastian hadn't flat out denied him and wanted him to stay just as much as Ciel did. And Ciel clung to that hope, praying against all odds that it wouldn't change in a few years.


	18. Opus 18

**A/N**: Thank you everyone for you wonderful support! It means so much to me ^^ I hope y'all enjoy the chapter! Many, many thanks to **socialbutrfly1379 **for being my amazing beta again! She was awesome working on this story :3

**Warnings**: Language**  
**

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Kuroshitsuji

* * *

Thunder rumbled overhead, a long and lethargic tone that continued to roll for several minutes. It faded away into the distance and the pitter-patter of the rain against the roof overtook the quiet evening once more. The rain continued peacefully for several minutes, a steady drum that led the chorus of nature.

Ciel looked up as a bright flash of lightning filled the room, making the lights flicker briefly. He turned another page in his book, forcing himself to focus. He started to jot down some notes when a sharp crack had his heart in his throat and the windows shook with the ferocity of the storm. A sigh escaped his mouth and he tried to focus on the equations that littered the pages but the onslaught of rain made it difficult to concentrate.

Absently, he tapped the pencil against the thick textbook and stared out the window. The rain came down heavier, forming miniature vertical streams on the pane. He traced the design with his eyes before looking at the clock. A long, suffering sigh escaped him when he realized only a few minutes had passed since he last checked the time.

With a groan, he pushed away from the desk and wandered into the kitchen. It wouldn't ease the restlessness but hopefully taking a small break from studying would help him focus a bit better. He poked through the refrigerator before settling on some Jell-o he made earlier in the week. The colorful red mass wiggled at him and Ciel jabbed at it with a spoon.

Snickering, he hummed the jingle to the Jell-o commercial as he carried the dessert back to his desk. Another bolt of lightning filled the skies outside and a clap of thunder echoed its bright flash.

"Sebastian would love this weather," he muttered to himself and cut out a small square.

His eyes flickered to his phone but it remained silent. It was only seven in the evening and he had at least an hour more before it would ring. Ciel sighed again and dragged his book closer to him. Sitting and staring at the phone for ages wouldn't make the time go by any quicker. As much as he didn't want to study new equations, it was for the best.

Ciel took another bite and started to write down more notes. The rain kept a steady beat for him, punctuated by claps of thunder and bolts of lightning that helped keep him focused. His pencil scratched against the paper, solving the equation given in his book. The familiar numbers and patterns soothed his mind until he slipped into an easy pattern.

It wasn't that he found the subject material boring, but the scheduled call from Sebastian in an hour had his mind wandering away from his notes. Their busy schedules kept them from talking as much as he wanted but Ciel would take what he could get.

Several months had passed since he last saw Sebastian in person. Summer had bled into fall and winter loomed on the horizon, and each day that passed made the yearning grow stronger. Ciel couldn't wait until he could see Sebastian again. When he left in early August, he worried that the distance would create a rift between them – one that gapped large and wide until they could no longer reach what they once had.

But Sebastian made every effort to keep the relationship they had and in turn, Ciel returned the sentiment. Not that it made things easier and Ciel missed the steady presence of Sebastian in his life. Work and school kept him busy, and made it impossible to talk every few days. At best, they could talk twice a week, and Ciel clung to those calls.

Sebastian teased him, saying he sounded like a lovesick girl, but Ciel could hear the longing in Sebastian's voice. Still, despite knowing the difficulties they would face, Sebastian remained adamant that Ciel return home and go to the college he wanted. Now, several months into the school year, Ciel knew Sebastian had made the right choice.

He enjoyed his classes and professors, and even working as a teaching assistant wasn't horrible. It ensured that he knew all his materials and kept him refreshed on things he learned as an underclassman. Going to the college near Sebastian's apartment wouldn't have given him the same satisfaction and Ciel knew he would've ended up disliking the situation after a while.

He grumbled under his breath and reached for another spoonful of Jell-o. Sebastian would never let him live it down if he knew Ciel's thoughts right now. Ciel could just imagine the smug smirk that would appear on Sebastian's face.

However, despite the added distance and the few times they could talk, Ciel wouldn't take anything back. He was happy with his choice and in a strange turn of events, the situation only made him care for Sebastian more. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, Sebastian had said at the airport the morning Ciel left.

Ciel paused and looked out the window. He tapped the pencil against his chin, recalling the day he left. It seemed like years ago and he found it hard to believe that only three months had passed. Thanksgiving was three days away and it wouldn't be long before winter break started. And, if they were lucky, Sebastian would visit for the holidays.

The thought made him grin and Ciel stood up to take the Jell-o back into the kitchen. The storm hadn't let up much and he could hear the wind howling against the walls of his apartment. It wasn't as large or as grand as Sebastian's apartment, but Ciel hoped that wouldn't bother him if he could come visit. Somehow, Ciel doubted Sebastian would care.

He meandered back into the living room, circling the coffee table twice to stretch out his legs and avoid the last problem he needed to solve. He debated saving it and asking for help tomorrow, as he didn't understand a part near the end of the equation. Better to figure it out with help then spend hours tearing out his hair over it.

With that thought, he shut the book and shoved it into his bag. No sense in stressing and slaving over one question on a Monday night. Mondays were bad enough without taunting questions.

He grabbed his phone from the desk and flopped down on the couch. Blue eyes stared intently at the device, silently willing it to ring. He jumped when the phone started to vibrate in his hand and Ciel fumbled to answer it.

"You must have ESP or something," he said as a greeting. Sebastian made an amused sound on the other line and Ciel plowed forward. "I just finished my homework and boom, you call."

Sebastian laughed. "I'm just talented," he teased. "How are you doing?"

Ciel reclined on the couch. "Not too bad. It's storming pretty badly, you'd like it. Oh, I have to stay on campus Wednesday until it closes because I have a class to teach since the professor wanted to leave early." He shook his head. "I swear; being a TA makes me feel like my professor's gopher. If he doesn't want to do something, it falls to me. I can't wait until I can look for internships."

"But the TA position pays for your tuition and gives you a small stipend," Sebastian pointed out. "It sucks, but it's better than having loans."

"Don't remind me," Ciel groaned. "I just wish I could beat that man over the head with one of the textbooks. I mean really, who doesn't know how to make copies with the copy machine? He's so computer illiterate and it drives me crazy. I think I should start charging him for all the computer lessons I end up giving him."

Deep, rich laughter sounded through the phone and Ciel found himself smiling at the familiar sound. It wasn't often that Sebastian outright laughed, but Ciel wished he would do it more often. He had a nice laugh.

He waited for the laughter to die down. "And what's so funny about that?"

"Just hearing you sound so adamant and passionate about it," Sebastian said with a stray chuckle. "I don't think I've heard you so worked up about something like this before…," he trailed off.

Ciel scoffed. "Don't you dare say-"

"It's rather endearing," Sebastian finished and Ciel sighed.

"Yeah, somehow I knew that's what you wanted to say," he said and rubbed the bridge of his nose. A clap of thunder echoed his thoughts and Ciel shook his head before laughing himself. "But yeah, that's my life so far. Nothing really exciting I guess. Although I did manage to make that eggplant dish you showed me, and it didn't turn out half bad, if I do say so myself. Of course, nothing beats the original but for now, it'll do."

Sebastian hummed. "Glad to hear that you learned something while staying with me," he said.

Ciel huffed. "I learned several things. I know how to make most of the dishes. Whether they come out properly or not is a topic for debate." He shrugged. "How are you doing? Did you finally finish that composition?"

"I'm fine," Sebastian answered. "I met with Doctor Midford the other day. We had lunch and caught up. She's still as strict and cynical as I remember from my childhood. I thought perhaps age would help her mellow but I swear it's only made her sharper. She threatened to drag to me to the barbers because my hair was too long and when I refused, I thought she would pin back my bangs herself."

Ciel snorted with laughter as he pictured Sebastian fighting off a determined older lady with bobby pins in her mouth. He hadn't met Elizabeth's mother, but from Sebastian's description, he could imagine her as a very classy, uptight sort of woman. One who obviously valued proper appearance.

"Well," Ciel said in between gasps of breath. "I'm glad she didn't do anything to them. I rather like you hair as is. Although I suppose telling her that wouldn't help much."

Sebastian grunted. "Probably not. I pity Elizabeth's future husband. He'll have to have a strong constitution to make it in that family." He clicked his tongue. "But for all that I nag on her, it was nice to see her and she helped me greatly when I was a child along with recent events. So I can't say that she's all that bad."

Ciel snickered. "She's just a little rough around the edges," he said and toyed with a piece of frayed string from the nearby blanket. "And your composition?"

"Ah yes, that little devil piece. I almost called it The Devil's Trifecta," Sebastian said.

"How come?"

"It took me three months to get over my dry spell, and then three months after that to finish writing it all," Sebastian answered. "And at the rate this director is going, it'll take three more months before its deemed truly done. But I figured that if I named it that, William would never let me live it down and I would only match the name he gave me."

Ciel shook his head. "That guy," he said. "I think maybe he's secretly infatuated with you but he doesn't know how to profess his love other than to fight with you. Like kids in the schoolyard. Or like the boy who tugs a girls pigtails but he really thinks she's cute. That sort of thing."

Sebastian made a gagging sound. "Please, don't even put that thought in my head. It's enough to make me vomit." He grunted. "Besides that, I already have someone so he'll just have to sulk over what he missed."

"Hmm, that's nice to know," Ciel said and smiled. "And he should know that I'm not about to let you go. He lost his chance."

"He never had a chance," Sebastian grumbled.

Ciel rolled his eyes. Over the phone, he could hear Soot approaching Sebastian, the bell growing louder along with her cries. She must've jumped onto his lap because the incessant mewling sounded right in his ear as though Soot were right next to him. "You spoil her," Ciel said and he could hear Soot purring through the lines. "How is she doing?"

Sebastian chuckled but didn't deny the statement. "She's doing well. Well past the recovery stage and is back to acting like her old self. Claude and Ron came to visit last week and she wasted no time in attacking Ronald's ankles." The bell jingled again. "Although, I'm sure she won't be happy with me soon."

"Oh? Why not?" Ciel questioned.

"I looked at my schedule," Sebastian said simply.

Ciel sucked in a deep breath and sat up straighter. "Yeah? And?" He clutched the blanket tighter, trying to will his heart to calm. It performed aerobatic flips in his chest and a slight tremor worked its way down his spine.

"I can take about a month off," Sebastian said and Ciel let out a breath he hadn't realized he had held. "I have the dates in my mind but I thought it best to leave that to you. After all, it's your apartment and family that I'm intruding on."

"What did you have in mind?" Ciel asked. "We can start there and change it if needed."

Sebastian made a soft noise. "I thought I would come up either the day before or the day of your birthday. You said school finished up around then so I won't bother you while you're studying for your finals." He scratched at Soot's ear and she purred louder. "And then just stay through the holidays and return mid-January."

Ciel beamed and nodded even though Sebastian couldn't see. "I think that'll work. I know the seventeenth through the nineteenth, I'll have some work to do on campus but after that, I'm a free man. I can take you around too and you can see my office." He paused. "Will snow bother you though?"

"It makes things a little more difficult, but I can manage," Sebastian said. "I'll just rely on you a little more than usual."

"I'll take good care of you," Ciel said softly. "I promise."

A low hum sounded through the speakers. "Thank you. And you're sure I won't bother your family during the holidays?"

Ciel shook his head. "My mom assured me that she didn't care if you stayed with us and can't wait to meet you. I think she's worried though that her cooking won't match up to yours." He laughed. "But yeah, it's not a problem at all. I'm really happy that you can stay, Sebastian."

"Me too," Sebastian murmured. "I've missed you."

"Same," Ciel said and tipped his head back to rest against the armrest.

He couldn't wipe the smile from his face and next month couldn't come soon enough. The waiting would test his patience but in the end, it would all be worth it. He would have to tell his mother the good news when he went home for Thanksgiving. She would probably have him clean the guest room though, but Ciel couldn't bring himself to care.

"What are you going to do with Soot?" he asked.

Sebastian sighed heavily. "I'll have to leave her here." He paused. "Don't give me that look. I'll miss you but you can't come with me. And I don't think you would like airplanes anyway."

Ciel ran a hand over his face. "How do you even know that she's giving you a look?"

"She stopped purring and I just know she's staring at me," Sebastian answered. "But she'll either stay with Mey-rin or Claude." Soot mewled loudly at the words.

"Sounds like she prefers that latter," Ciel said.

Sebastian clicked his tongue. "It comes down to what they say. We're getting together for Thanksgiving at Claude's place, as per tradition, and we'll sort out details there. Although I have a feeling I'll need to beg for Soot's forgiveness when I come back." He murmured something unintelligible to Soot.

"You're hopeless," Ciel teased, jumping slightly as thunder filled the night.

He tugged the blanket closer and buried his toes into the crease of the couch. In less than a month, he would get to see Sebastian again. This time, he would get to play host and he could only hope that Sebastian liked everything. He would have to do research for the places he wanted to take Sebastian to and make sure they could accommodate Sebastian.

His eyes darted around the room. He'd also have to tidy his apartment up before then too. Even if Sebastian couldn't see the mess, it would still make things harder for Sebastian. The last thing Ciel needed was Sebastian tripping over a pile of clothes he had yet to wash. And then Sebastian would turn around and tease him for the messy apartment.

He sighed quietly. He needed to make a list of everything he had to do before Sebastian arrived. The chores would keep him busy but at least that would make the time go fast, or so he hoped. But the added work was worth it to Ciel and he would gladly clean his apartment from top to bottom if it meant he could see Sebastian again.

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

Ciel bounced lightly on the balls of his feet, waiting impatiently for Sebastian to arrive. Sebastian had called when the plane landed, letting him know that he would arrive at the baggage claim soon and Ciel couldn't wait. He hoped Sebastian wouldn't have any problems finding the area and wondered if he could've met him at the gate.

Probably not, but it wouldn't have hurt to ask. It would've at least eased some of Ciel's nerves and he almost started to pace when he caught sight of a familiar figure walking through the area. An attendant walked next to him and Ciel crossed the floor to meet them.

"Sebastian," he called as he approached and Sebastian's head turned to look at him. A small smile flickered across his lips and Ciel reached for him. "You got here pretty fast."

"Being blind has its perks," Sebastian said and turned to the woman next to him. "Thank you for your assistance."

She thanked them and Ciel guided Sebastian to the baggage claim. "How many bags do you have?" he asked.

"Just one," Sebastian answered. "It's a dark green color and has a white piece of fabric around the handle."

Ciel scanned the carousel for the bag in question. The bags still came down from the chute and after a few minutes of waiting, Ciel spotted it. He grabbed it and checked the tags, verifying that it belonged to Sebastian. "We're good to go," he said and they started to walk again. "I'm parked at the front thanks to that handy parking pass you sent me. We just have a small walk through the terminal to get there."

Sebastian nodded. "That's fine with me. My legs don't mind the walk. I swear they just keep making the leg space on airplanes smaller each year. Next thing you know they'll have us standing up the whole flight and packed in the cabin like sardines."

"I hope not," Ciel muttered as the crowd thinned. "I hope you brought some warm clothes. They're calling for a white Christmas and we already have some snow on the ground."

"That's what I heard," Sebastian said. "I couldn't live up here. Too cold for my southern blood."

They laughed and continued down the hallway. A few people walked around them but for the most part, the area stayed relatively empty. Ciel took the chance to slip his hand into Sebastian's and smiled when Sebastian gave it a warm squeeze. Five months was too long and Ciel hoped the break didn't go by quickly.

He didn't know the next time he would get to see Sebastian after this but he hoped it wouldn't take another five months. Spring break was too short to visit though and Ciel didn't know how the summer would pan out. If he wanted to graduate in two years, he would have to take summer classes in order to prepare for an internship later in the year. It would make things difficult but Ciel knew they could work through it.

"I hope you're ready for the cold," Ciel said as they approached the end of the terminal. "It's a short walk to the car but the cold will still find a way to settle into your bones."

"Joy," Sebastian drawled and grimaced when the doors slid open, wind brushing against his face. "Oh, this will be fun."

Ciel laughed as he found his car. "At least I could park close. Otherwise I would've had to park way out there in the back."

Sebastian nodded. "Another perk," he said.

"The mighty Sebastian, felled by cold," Ciel said as he placed the bags in the trunk. "I now know your weakness. Aside from cats, of course. I imagine Soot wasn't happy with you leaving."

"Not particularly," Sebastian said. "She saw the suitcase and kept trying to jump in. If she had opposable thumbs, I know she would've unzipped the bag and climbed in. I had Claude check to make sure she didn't get in the bags, though, before I left. The belly of a plane is no place for her."

Ciel voiced his agreement and started the car. He carefully navigated the parking lot and paid the parking fee before hitting the highway. The radio played softly, but the silence between them wasn't awkward. It stayed comfortable and Ciel could see a small smile on Sebastian's face. It made him happy, knowing that Sebastian had finally made it to see him.

"I don't have a guest room at my apartment, poor college student that I am," Ciel said, breaking the silence. "But you can take my bed and I'll take the couch. I've fallen asleep there plenty of times before and it's only for a few days."

Sebastian turned to look at him. "Wouldn't it just be easier to share the bed?" he asked.

Ciel's cheeks heated up slightly. "Well, I thought about it but I didn't know if you would want to do that. I figured it was just best for me to take the couch." He drummed his fingers along the steering wheel. "But if you want to share, I'm not against that. I have to go in early tomorrow to proctor an exam and then I'm done for the day."

"Let's me sleep in then," Sebastian said with a grin. "Then we can celebrate your birthday."

"Mm, sounds good," Ciel said and placed a kiss on the back of Sebastian's hand. "I'm glad you're here."

Sebastian echoed the statement and silence settled in the car once more. With the clouds thick and heavy with unshed snow and the winds picking up, Ciel wanted to concentrate on driving. There would be plenty of time for talking when they arrived at the apartment. The snow would make things a pain tomorrow and Ciel had no doubt students would arrive late, but he couldn't wait to take Sebastian out into it.

The warm south was Sebastian's domain, but the colder north was his. And Ciel wanted to show Sebastian everything that he could.

Thirty minutes later, they pulled up to Ciel's apartment just as the first snowflakes started to sprinkle down to the ground. Ciel grabbed the larger bag from the trunk while Sebastian handled the smaller one. "It's nothing fancy," Ciel said as he led the way to his apartment. "But it's still comfy."

Sebastian smiled. "You don't have to worry about impressing me, Ciel. I'm not here to judge you on anything." He waited patiently for Ciel to unlock the door.

"Yeah well, I don't think I've ever cleaned my apartment or room back home so thoroughly before," Ciel said as he pushed the door open. "So you should feel honored that I went through so much trouble for you."

"I do," Sebastian answered honestly. He toed off his shoes and nudged them to the side. "Do I get a grand tour?"

Ciel rolled his eyes. "Not sure how grand it will be, but yeah. Set your bags there and we'll get to them later.

He grabbed Sebastian's arm and carefully led him into the living room, making sure to describe where everything was. This wasn't Sebastian's apartment and Ciel had thrust him into a whole new place where the surroundings had vastly changed. Whereas Sebastian's apartment was more spacious, Ciel's was on the small side and wasn't as easy to maneuver.

He took his time, letting Sebastian feel everything around him. By the time they finished with the living room, Ciel felt exhausted and Sebastian looked equally as tired. He didn't know how long it took Sebastian to memorize everything in his apartment, let along the amount of time it must've taken him to find the perfect one.

It gave him a newfound respect for Sebastian and he guided Sebastian to the bedroom. "The dining room is just opposite of the living room, but I rarely use that space. The table is just another place for junk to collect," he said with a laugh. He clicked a light on. "This is the bedroom and the bathroom is directly to your right."

With patient hands, he led Sebastian around the bed, letting him feel the distance between it and the walls. Thankfully, the bed took up the most space in the room and made the layout of the bedroom rather simplistic. If anything, the living room would prove the biggest challenge for Sebastian with the coffee table in the middle and the odd jut of the furniture.

After circling the bottom of the bed twice, Sebastian sat down heavily on the mattress and sighed. "I like this room," he said. "Simple and straight forward."

Ciel smiled and stepped closer to Sebastian. "I'm glad to hear that. Sorry that everything else is a little more difficult."

Sebastian shrugged and reached for him. "That's life for you," he said. "You'll have your easy and your difficult times. The difficult times make you appreciate the simpler things."

A low hum left Ciel's mouth as Sebastian reached for him. Cool fingers curled around his wrist and tugged him closer so he straddled his legs. "Then this must be one of those simple times," Ciel murmured as Sebastian's hands crept up to cup his cheeks. Fingers soothed over his skin, tracing the slope of his nose and following a path under his eyes.

He closed his eyes as they stroked down, tracing the curve of his jaw until searching fingers brushed against his lips. Without any prompting, Ciel leaned forward to close the gap between them and pressed their lips together. Sebastian made a soft noise and one hand circled around to cup the back of his neck in a gentle hold.

Ciel moaned and moved to kneel on the bed. Too many months had passed since he felt Sebastian's body against his and he yearned to have Sebastian's arms around his in a warm embrace.

They tumbled back onto the bed, Sebastian scooting up closer to the headboard so Ciel could join him on the bed. Wandering hands skimmed down Ciel's body, teasing but loving. They traced the curves and dips of his body, worshiping it as best Sebastian could despite the clothes that still separated them.

Each fleeting touch had Ciel trembling until he turned into a quivering mess of limbs. His arms threatened to give out and he panted heavily into Sebastian's mouth. "Oh fuck, I missed you," he hissed and Sebastian's fingers rubbed up and down his sides.

"Me too," Sebastian groaned and deftly rolled them over, pinning Ciel to the mattress.

Ciel squirmed against the comforter and tilted his head back, giving Sebastian access to more skin. Teeth nipped and sucked at his skin, creating several bright marks that would surely bruise during the night. "Everyone will, ah, see those tomorrow," Ciel panted.

"That's the point," Sebastian murmured against his neck but drew away after placing a fluttering kiss to his racing pulse.

"Smug bastard," Ciel grumbled and draped his arms around Sebastian's neck, pulling him back for another bruising kiss. Teeth clicked together before Sebastian tilted his head more, softening the kiss and taking the chance to thrust his tongue into Ciel's mouth.

Their bodies pressed against each other, hips rocking and grinding slightly in a sensual dance that had Ciel's fingers tightening in Sebastian's hair. His mind and body screamed for more, and he groaned loudly when Sebastian's hand curled around his hip. Fingers dipped below the waistband of his pants, teasing the skin there.

Every touch felt like fire erupting throughout Ciel's body. The flames licked and danced along his nerves, leaving them raw until Ciel could feel every subtle shift of Sebastian's body against his. Each puffing breath that fanned his face was like wind in the desert, welcome but hot and scorching. It left his mouth parched and his body aching for relief of any kind.

"Sebastian," he moaned and nearly whined when Sebastian pulled away. His eyes fluttered open and blinked several times before they focused on the hazy figure hovering above him. "What happened?"

Sebastian chuckled, the sound low and husky in his throat. "Making sure we don't get too ahead of ourselves," he said and kissed the side of his neck.

"Tease," Ciel huffed and his head fell back to rest against the mattress. He bucked his hips up, drawing a low groan from them both as their groins rubbed together and Ciel couldn't stop the smug smirk from crossing his lips. "Are you sure you don't want to continue?"

"As tempting as it is, I'll have to pass," Sebastian said and reluctantly withdrew. "Relationships take time and for me, trust is a big factor."

"Your self-restraint is maddening."

Sebastian chuckled. "I'll make it up to you through other means. You're not the only one who seeks carnal pleasure."

Ciel shuddered at the smoldering look Sebastian gave him and he let out a shaky breath. He understood why Sebastian wanted to wait and he respected it. Even if playing the waiting game drove Ciel insane. He would just consider it another part of growing up.

"I need a cold shower," he groaned and tossed an arm over his eyes.

"Just step outside for a few minutes," Sebastian teased and the comforter rustled as he moved back to the edge of the bed.

Ciel gave a breathless laugh and took a few breaths to calm himself before rolling off the bed. "Shall we finish the rest of the tour and then get dinner?" he asked. "I'd make you something but I don't really have much food left in my apartment since I'm leaving in a few days."

Sebastian nodded. "That sounds fine with me." He offered a mock bow. "Lead the way. I'm at your mercy."

Ciel rolled his eyes and walked over to Sebastian. Despite the months that had passed, nothing had truly changed between them and Ciel took comfort in knowing that. It gave him hope for the future and he gave Sebastian a quick kiss on the cheek. He understood Sebastian's concerns but still hoped for the best.

And as Sebastian told him before, it was best just to take things a day at a time.

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

Ciel sighed as he shuffled through the papers that sat on his desk. Sunlight streamed through the window and he paused to look at it, the green leaves waving in the light wind. Spring was just around the corner but already, the trees had started to bloom. It drove Ciel crazy sitting inside his cramped office when it kept him separated from the beautiful day outside his window.

"Stupid equations," he grumbled and looked over the plotted graph that currently gave him the most trouble. Times like this made him wonder why he decided to go back to school. But most of the time, the course work didn't bother him. It just bothered him that he had to stay inside on such a nice day.

Soft music played from the speakers on his computer and helped soothe his already frayed nerves. If Ciel closed his eyes, he could make the office vanish and pretend he was in Sebastian's living room again, listening to him play the piano. Sebastian had sent him his newest composition after he dubbed it truly complete and Ciel couldn't stop listening to it.

The melody always threatened to steal him away, sweeping him out of his chair and plunging him into a world that existed only in his mind. Through each singing instrument, Ciel could feel Sebastian around. Every part reminded Ciel of him, from the familiar piano to the singing cellos. He had a sneaky suspicion that Sebastian gave the cellos a solo part because of him.

Not that he would complain though. It was flattery of the highest regard and Ciel could listen to the deep sound from the strings, knowing something that no one else would know. It never failed to put a smile on his face.

Another long sigh and Ciel forced himself to focus on his work again. He couldn't afford to let himself drift away on the notes that flowed from the staff. If his grades slipped, he couldn't apply to the upcoming internships for the summer and fall terms. Landing an internship at a company opened several doors and offered the possibility of a future job.

He looked up as his phone vibrated across the desk and he reached for it, frowning at the unfamiliar number. He recognized the area code and knew it to be somewhere near where Sebastian lived. Shaking his head, he pressed the talk button and brought the phone up to his ear.

"Hello?"

"Hello, is this Ciel Phantomhive?" a woman asked.

He nodded out of habit. "Yes, it is. May I ask who is speaking?"

"This is Laura at Southeast Medical Hospital," she said and Ciel's heart started to beat faster. He knew that hospital all too well and he wiped his hand on his pants. "I'm calling in regards to a…"


	19. Opus 19

**A/N**: Second to last chapter! I'm up visiting my grandma - who has no internet so I'm back to using my phone to post lol - so I'm behind answering reviews from last week but I'll get to them when I get home in a few days. Thank you everyone for your wonderful support! ^^

Many, many thanks to **socialbutrfly1379 **for being my amazing beta again! She was awesome working on this story :3

**Warnings**: Language**  
**

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Kuroshitsuji

* * *

Fluffy white clouds dotted the pristine blue sky. Ciel stared idly at them through the window of the plane and his leg bounced with anxious tension. They cut through a cloud and for a while, nothing but a light gray color filled his window. His fingers uncurled and curled again as they finished passing through the cloud and the ground appeared once more.

He silently urged the plane to go faster. The quicker they landed and Ciel left the plane, the faster he could see Sebastian. Ciel bit his lip at the thought and glared intently out the window but it didn't stop his heart from racing a little more. Like a wildfire, thoughts of Sebastian consumed his mind and Ciel remained helpless to their burning touch.

They haunted him at night and kept him awake until finally, he found a flight that would take him to see Sebastian. He didn't want to think about how much time had passed since that fateful call and now. Too long, his mind supplied, but Ciel hoped to rectify that today. If only the plane would go just a bit faster.

His eyes lowered to the ground below as it started to grow closer and the quilted pattern began to form actual shapes. Buildings became sharper and trees started to define themselves around the surrounding area.

His leg stopped bouncing and his fingers picked up the rhythm. Behind him, a baby started to cry as the cabin pressure changed slightly as they readied for landing. He scrunched his nose and swallowed, popping his ears. Feeling better, he turned his attention to the scenery outside the window. He could make out the cars as they flew over the highway and he vaguely compared them to small toys.

The runway appeared under the plane and it wasn't long before the aircraft jolted as it touched the tarmac. Fast wind raced over the wings and the engines whirled as they worked to slow the plane down. A few moment later, the plane came to a steady speed and started to taxi to its gate.

Ciel shifted impatiently in his seat and turned his phone on to check the time. Each second seemed to crawl by and he jumped to his feet the moment the pilot turned off the seatbelt sign. He regretted it the next minute as he couldn't go anywhere in the crowded cabin and they had yet to let the passengers start to disembark.

After what felt like hours, the crowd started to thin and Ciel grabbed his bag. Quickly, he walked down the aisle and hurried off the plane. He muttered an apology to someone as he brushed past them and continued up the ramp without looking back. He didn't have to slow down, not when something else drove him forward.

He hurried through the terminal, searching for the nearest exit and practically bolting for the door when he found it. He bypassed the baggage claim and made his way to the car rental stand. He hated that he would have to rent a car, but Claude couldn't come pick him up and Ciel didn't want to bother him.

The man at the counter greeted him with a smile and Ciel forced one on his face. "I need to pick up a car," he said and passed the man his license. "Ciel Phantomhive."

"Ah yes, here we are," the man said. "I just need you to fill out some paperwork and it's all yours."

Ciel sighed at the papers but started to fill out the blanks. A necessary evil he supposed, but it didn't mean he liked it anymore. Especially not after a long flight when all he wanted was a hot shower and a bed. However, that would have to wait until after he saw Sebastian. After all, he didn't know how Sebastian…

He shook his head at the thought and forced his mind not to think about it or Sebastian. He couldn't let himself get distracted. It would only make things worse and he already found it hard enough to concentrate now. How he made it this far without any problems, Ciel didn't know. But he couldn't wait to get back to Sebastian's side again. He only hoped that everything worked out for the best in the end.

He scowled at himself for letting his thoughts derail and pushed the papers back to the man. At this rate, he didn't trust himself to drive and he shoved all this thoughts to the side.

"Everything seems in order," the man said and set a pair of keys on the counter. "If you follow me, I'll show you to your car and we can get you on your way."

"Thanks," Ciel said and grabbed his bag along with his keys. He had requested a small car, one that mimicked the one he had at home. He would feel far more comfortable driving that than a larger and more bulky vehicle.

Bright sunlight greeted them and Ciel winced as it shone directly in his eyes. They watered slightly and he rubbed at them, clearing away the moisture before they stopped in front of a silver car.

"Here we are," the man said.

Ciel thanked him and popped the trunk, setting his bag in the back. He walked around the car, inspecting it for any previous damage and then climbed in. Blue eyes darted around the interior of the car and settled on the navigation system. At least he wouldn't get too lost. Once he reached the Arts District, he knew where to go. It was just the matter of getting there.

The man gave him a small wave and Ciel returned it before guiding the car out of the parking lot. With a heavy sigh, he merged with traffic and clutched the steering wheel tightly. He didn't like driving in new places, especially when he wasn't in his own car. It left his shoulders tense and he was glad that traffic wasn't too heavy. Hopefully it would stay that way.

The scenery rushed by and the sun made the road dance with fake water. It shimmered and waved across the surface, coaxing Ciel to continue chasing it across the endless blacktop. Despite the heat outside though, the AC kept the car cool and Ciel counted that as a saving grace. Standing outside in the heat wouldn't make things any easier for him.

He turned onto a ramp leading towards the city and Ciel wished he had taken the time to slip the CD into the player. At least then, he could listen to Sebastian's compositions. No matter what, the music always put him at ease and Ciel needed that more than ever as the city skyline started to grow larger in the window.

Breathe, he told himself and let out another long sigh. He couldn't allow himself to get flustered before seeing Sebastian. It wouldn't do either of them any good and Ciel sucked in a deep breath.

He pushed harder on the gas pedal and the car responded quickly. The early afternoon hour ensured that everyone was back at work from lunch and Ciel sincerely hoped the roads going into the city would stay light. He wanted to zip across the highway and speed straight towards Sebastian.

Ciel chewed the inside of his cheek and eased off the gas before a cop caught him speeding. He ran a hand through his hair and grumbled under his breath, annoyed that he still had several miles to go. Why hadn't they invented flying cars yet? Or even better, a teleportation device? That would save so much trouble.

He laughed at himself as the car moved around the outer limits of the city. Funny how he could lose all his patience when it came to Sebastian. Ciel didn't know if that was a good or bad thing, but he wanted to say it was a good thing. No matter how much his mother teased him and said that he was head over heels for Sebastian.

Let her talk and say what she wanted. Even she couldn't deny that Sebastian had that type of quality that just drew people in. He had a silver tongue and knew how sway even the most hardened of hearts. Bar William, of course. Perhaps Sebastian had a bit of demon in him. Instead of a silver tongue, he had a demon's tongue.

Ciel snorted and took the exit when the navigation system prompted him. The familiar area made Ciel perk up and he navigated the confusing roads with surprising ease. It didn't take long before he found his way to the Arts District and he slowed down as he looked for the proper street.

A low curse left his mouth when he drove past it and he grumbled under his breath as he searched for a place to do a U-turn. After a few minutes of hunting and numerous turns, he found himself on the proper street. "It shouldn't be this difficult," he muttered as he scanned the apartments.

He found Sebastian's apartment with ease and Ciel guided the car to the curb, taking care not to rub the tires against it. The last thing he needed was the car company to charge him extra for throwing the vehicle out of alignment. He turned the engine off and climbed out, grimacing at the stifling heat that curled around him. It sucked the cool air from the car and burned away the faint tendrils that clung to his skin.

Ciel squinted against the light as he slammed the door shut and locked it. He hurried to the front door, seeking shade even though it didn't offer much variation temperature wise.

The hot sun beat down on the sidewalk behind him, making sweat bead on Ciel's upper lip. He licked it away and stared at the door in front of him before raising his hand to knock on it. His heart hammered against his chest and Ciel could feel a bead of sweat trickling down his back. It made him squirm uncomfortably, but only temporarily calmed his thoughts.

He didn't know what to expect once the door opened and the uncertainty made his head spin. The heat didn't help anything and he shifted on his feet, hoping someone would answer the door soon. He pressed the doorbell for added measures, too anxious to stay patient.

He had waited far too long for this and Ciel bounced impatiently on his feet. Ever since he received the call from Southeast Medical Hospital, Ciel could barely keep still. It was all he could do not to jump on the first flight out and fly down to see Sebastian. It wouldn't have done them any good though and Ciel had to force himself to face everything with a level head.

The speaker next to him crackled to life and Ciel nearly lunged for it. "Yes?'

"It's me, Sebastian," Ciel said and anxiously looked back at the door. "Hurry up and let me in, I'm melting out here."

Sebastian didn't answer but it wasn't long before the locks on the door slid from their homes. The door opened and Ciel breathed a sigh of relief at the cool air that rushed over him. "Ciel?" Sebastian questioned and cocked his head. "What are you doing here?"

Ciel shook his head. "Can we talk inside? I swear it's hotter this summer than it was last year."

"Of course," Sebastian answered and stepped to the side, letting him in.

He stepped inside and shut the door behind him, taking the time to look around the familiar apartment. Nothing had really changed since last year and Ciel sucked in a deep breath, taking in the scent of whatever Sebastian had for lunch. Curry, if Ciel had to guess. From the living room, he could hear Soot shuffling about; the bell on her collar ringing pleasantly.

Nothing had changed and Ciel felt his shoulders relaxing at the familiarity of it. It felt like coming home and he scratched Soot's head as he circled around the couch.

"Do you want anything to drink?" Sebastian asked.

"Water, please."

Sebastian nodded and busied himself in the kitchen while Ciel took a seat. Soot scampered over to him, crawling into his lap and demanding attention. He sneezed twice at her close proximity but she didn't race away as she did before. Instead, she stared at him expectantly, waiting for Ciel to show her affection.

He rolled his eyes and rubbed her ears as Sebastian came back into the living room. "Thank you," Ciel said as Sebastian set the drink in front of him on the coffee table. Soot jumped from his lap and padded over to Sebastian, content to receive attention from him.

"Not that I'm complaining," Sebastian started as Ciel sipped at his drink. "But what are you doing here? I thought you had summer classes so you couldn't visit." He gave Ciel a look, clearly telling him that he hoped Ciel hadn't skipped his classes just to visit him. Although the glare lost its effect when he wasn't exactly looking Ciel in the eyes.

"Well, part of that is true," Ciel began. "I am here for classes, but not in the respect that you're thinking."

Sebastian reclined on the couch and nodded. "Okay."

Ciel set his drink down. "I'm required to take an internship during one of my semesters in my last year. It gives us experience and helps with networking, all that good stuff. I had applied for a few in early March and had planned to apply for more in April as well. But right after spring break, I received a call from (). She works at Southeast Medical Hospital, the one not too far from here."

Sebastian nodded. "I know it. I've heard good things about them from the people who work there."

"Yeah. They have really great benefits and other perks for their employees," Ciel said. "I applied there on a whim, because they have several hospitals throughout the country, and I thought, why not? They're a good company and the internship they offered fit what I needed."

Understanding dawned on Sebastian's face and his lips quirked into a smile but he didn't say anything. Instead, he gestured for Ciel to continue.

"They had reviewed my application and liked what they saw. I had a few interviews with them before they accepted me for the internship program at their hospital," Ciel said and his leg jiggled with excitement. "My professors okayed the program although dealing with the advisor was a pain. She complained the whole time about looking up the proper codes and signing me up for the classes I needed, but I finally sorted her out."

Sebastian chuckled. "Why is she an advisor then if she doesn't want to do her job properly? Defeats the purpose, I think."

Ciel shrugged. "Who knows," he said.

"One of those mysteries, I guess," Sebastian said and rubbed the pads of Soot's paws. "How long is your internship?"

Ciel grinned. "About seven months," he said and watched as surprise flickered across Sebastian's face. "It goes through summer and fall terms."

"Will that affect when you graduate?" Sebastian questioned.

He shook his head. "No. I'll still graduate in spring next year because I'll have to do some coursework during my internship. But even if it bumped me back a semester, I still would've accepted it. Southeast Medical is a good company to work for and if they like me, there is a strong chance they'll hire me full time after I graduate."

Sebastian hummed and his hands fell to his lap. "At the location here or at another one of their locations?" he asked.

"Here," Ciel said and stood up. He crossed the small distance between the couches and took a seat next to Sebastian. "Before you get mad at me, know that I didn't just pick this company because I wanted to see you again. It helped influence it to some degree, but Southeast Medical matches almost everything that I'm looking for in a company. The location was just an added perk."

Sebastian patted Soot's rump and she hopped off the couch with a disgruntled mewl. "I wasn't mad at you," Sebastian said after she left and he reached for Ciel. "If anything I was just concerned about how this would affect your graduation. I can agree that it's a good opportunity, so I can't fault you for that."

Ciel smiled, pleased that Sebastian wasn't upset with him. It was a big move and an even larger commitment to accept a job so far away from home. But the way Ciel saw it, it was two-fold. It would give him experience with a company he wanted to work with and it would test himself. If he couldn't handle seven months away from his family, he couldn't expect to stay down south with Sebastian. This way everyone won.

"So," he started and scooted closer. "Do you have anything to say?"

Crimson eyes danced with mirth. "A whim, huh?"

Ciel grinned. "Okay, maybe it wasn't a whim that I applied there. I might've looked up a few companies nearby to see if they offered any internship positions for my degree," he said and Sebastian chuckled at him. "But it turned out for the best, didn't it."

"That it did," Sebastian said and his hands searched for Ciel. Ciel grabbed them and guided them to his face, letting Sebastian feel where he was. "Congratulations, Ciel," he said and leaned forward, capturing his lips in a warm kiss.

Ciel melted into the kiss, falling into Sebastian's embrace with a quiet sigh. They tumbled back onto the couch, Sebastian's arm curling around his waist and the other hand coming up to cup the back of his head. They broke apart briefly before their lips met again in a slightly rougher kiss that had Ciel moaning lowly.

When they pulled apart again, Ciel brushed aside a strand of hair that had fallen down onto Sebastian's face. "I'll take that as a happy reaction," he said with a pleased smile.

"Very happy," Sebastian murmured. "It wasn't the easiest to leave you in January and I've missed you. It's been, what, almost five months since we last saw each other."

Ciel nodded and shifted so he could rest his head on Sebastian's chest. "And here we thought it wouldn't be until winter break that we would see each other again," he said. "Now you're stuck with me."

Sebastian chuckled. "I can handle that," he said. "Where are you staying?"

"They're letting me stay at the medical dorms. I sent most of my bags forward before I left and as soon as finals ended, I caught the first plane I could get," Ciel answered. "From what I saw, the room look a little cramped, but it makes things easier for all of us and saves me money. Not to mention, I can easily visit you whenever I want."

"I like the sound of that," Sebastian said, tracing random patterns across Ciel's back. "I missed you."

Ciel kissed the hollow of Sebastian's throat, drawing a soft noise from him. "I missed you, too. I wanted to surprise you but at the same time, I wasn't sure how you would take it," he said. "It drove me crazy for a while, trying to decide what to do."

But the added work of preparing for the move and submitting the proper documents for school helped keep him busy and made the days go by quicker. Something Ciel thoroughly enjoyed. It was hard though, not blurting out the good news to Sebastian whenever they talked on the phone, but somehow, Ciel managed.

He turned his head to look at Sebastian and rested his chin on his chest. "I have to leave tonight though. They're expecting me this evening and I have a few meetings tomorrow. But I'm free over the weekend if you want to do anything."

"We should celebrate your success," Sebastian said. "Just the two of us. I'll order a cake from the bakery on Main and we'll do something for dinner."

"Sounds good," Ciel answered, content with the peaceful air around them. Now that the shock had worn off, he found that he could focus a little more clearly and he didn't want to move. He was comfortable in Sebastian's embrace and more than anything, it felt like coming home. He wanted to do this every day, as cliché as it sounded. Sebastian made him happy, simple as that.

Wasn't that one of the founding bases in a relationship? Happiness? Ciel smiled and closed his eyes, as Sebastian continued to draw random patterns against his back. Finally, after several months of waiting and almost a year later, he was back and with Sebastian again. Despite the vicissitudes throughout the year since they first met, Ciel couldn't picture himself anywhere else.

They might've started out with a rocky start, but no relationship was without rough patches. Making it through each one though only made them stronger and Ciel had a feeling they could make it through any future problems. They made it this far and Ciel hoped to make it further.

He sighed and Sebastian looked at him questioningly. "Just thinking," Ciel murmured.

"About?" Sebastian prompted.

Ciel shook his head and his cheeks burned. He couldn't say the thoughts on his mind right now, finding them too embarrassing. That, and he wanted to make sure he meant the words when he finally spoke them. Too many times people threw them around without thinking about the true weight they bore.

He ducked his head from Sebastian's gaze, even though Sebastian couldn't see him, and mouthed the words into a soft shirt. 'I think I love you.' They went unheard for the time being, but in time, Ciel would say them aloud to Sebastian. But only when he knew for sure that the feelings he felt were that of love.

"What time do you have to leave?" Sebastian asked and Ciel looked up.

"Around four," he answered and searched for a clock. "It's two right now."

Sebastian hummed and patted his shoulder, asking him to sit up. Ciel rolled off him and stood from the couch as Sebastian climbed to his feet as well. "It's not much, but I've started a new composition," he said and Ciel perked up. "Not exactly the most congratulating present but you caught me off guard."

Ciel laughed as he perched on the edge of Sebastian's desk. "I don't need anything," he said. Sebastian smoothed his fingers over the keys. "But this is more than enough. You know how much I like hearing your compositions."

"Hopefully you'll like this one," Sebastian said and his fingers rested lightly on the keys. "It's a duet, but I'm still transcribing the part for the piano. So it might sound a little rough."

"That's fine," Ciel said. "It just makes me even more excited to hear the final version."

Sebastian smiled and pressed against the keys, compressing them so that the music flowed from his fingers. The notes filled the apartment with their melody, sweeping Ciel up into their currents. He didn't need words to fall into the tune and he let them carry him away. They carried him away to a place that Sebastian created just for him. One where no one else existed but them.

Like warm, outstretched arms, they welcomed him into their embrace. And through them, Ciel could feel Sebastian in every note and pitch that played from the piano. It captured his senses, leaving him hyperaware to everything that was Sebastian.

The careful way slender fingers graced the keys to the faint smile that ghosted across bowed lips. Unseeing but beautiful eyes had vanished behind eyelids as Sebastian lost himself to his music, falling into the tone as the melody danced around them. Every action and motion captivated Ciel and he watched with bated breath, concerned that even the quietest of noises would shatter the peaceful air.

But Sebastian continued whether he heard Ciel or not. His fingers found the keys effortlessly, a tribute to his love for the piano and music. Ciel likened it to a dance, and Sebastian could dance the best of them. He stepped with light and assured steps until everyone stopped to watch him move.

The notes surged and Ciel felt a chill race down his spine, making goosebumps erupt along his skin. The melody struck deep and true within him, and Ciel felt its uplifting nature surround him. It coaxed his soul to take to the skies with newly born wings while singing an unsung song.

His eyes slipped shut and Ciel let out a shuddering breath. What remained of his senses fled his body and plunged him into the depths of Sebastian's music. He tipped his head back and a smile touched his lips. In the notes, Ciel could feel and see Sebastian, and suddenly the long months that had separated them vanished before him.

With the music around him, Ciel had never felt closer to Sebastian. Sebastian was his music. He put everything into each note and through it, Ciel could always find him. Every note and crescendo came from Sebastian's thoughts and heart, putting his thoughts onto the pages for everyone to hear. And Ciel found that he could understand the notes that leapt from the papers.

The music annotations drew them together and bridged a connection between them that could stretch across the miles. It traveled along a staff compared to a road. But like a road, it always led Ciel back to Sebastian. And in return, it gave Sebastian a pathway to Ciel.

It destroyed the final section of the wall that once stood between them and paved a long, flat expanse that allowed Ciel to see Sebastian no matter where he looked. The once stone gargoyles had cracked, their silently screaming mouths had long since crumbled and fallen to the elements. They no longer protected the wall and Ciel had no problem stepping over their broken bodies.

They no longer intimidated him and held him back. He no longer stood in the shadow of the wall and the stone creatures that stood over him. Now, they sat discarded and broken in his shadow as he towered over them.

And where the wall once stood, a long white winding path covered with black lines took its place. It twisted and vanished off into the distance, and with each step Ciel took along with it, a note appeared underfoot. The notes fell faster as he started to run along the path, knowing already where it would lead.

The whole time, the path had lain hidden under the wall. It waited patiently for the wall's destruction so it could lead Ciel to Sebastian, and now that Ciel found it, it sang loudly to him. It offered freedom and a promise. A promise to lead him always to Sebastian, and Ciel clung greedily to the promise.

Blue eyes opened as Ciel pulled in a deep breath. Before him, the music had started to taper away and Ciel found his senses slowly sinking back into his body. It left him shaky but fulfilled. He felt complete and the last remnants of the melody still played in his mind.

He stood and crossed the small distance to the piano bench. Sebastian turned to look at him and Ciel wasted little time drawing him into a heated kiss. Sebastian stiffened briefly under him in confusion before melting into the embrace and tugging him closer. They broke apart after a short time and Sebastian smirked.

"I should play for you more often," he teased.

Ciel rolled his eyes. "Hush you," he said and let Sebastian pull him down for another kiss.

He would never admit what had drawn him to react so passionate to the song and Ciel tucked that secret deep in mind. A secret that for the first time, he had truly seen Sebastian in all his glory. The staff had led him directly to Sebastian as promised and had torn off the veil that had once covered Ciel's eyes, allowing him to see Sebastian without the wall between them.

And Ciel would lie if he said he hadn't fallen in love with Sebastian all over again.

The music between them wasn't just music. It was a bridge, one that had connected their lives together with the starting of a single note. All Ciel needed to do was close his eyes and let the music embrace him. It took care of the rest and subsequently set the rest of his life in motion. A life that Ciel couldn't imagine without Sebastian.


	20. Opus 20

**A/N**: Last chapter! See end of the chapter for all my sappy notes, haha. I hope y'all enjoy the chapter and thank you so much for reading! ^^

Again, many, many thanks to **socialbutrfly1379 **for being my amazing beta again! She was awesome working on this story :3

**Warnings**: Language, **light smut****  
**

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Kuroshitsuji

* * *

People packed the church, filling the pews with their bodies and the air with their voices. The noise rolled about in soft murmurs that sounded more like hundreds of winged insects taking to the air. No voice rose above the other, but rather, they all stayed at the same muted tone.

It left for an unnerving feeling and Ciel shifted his weight. Standing at the front of the church made the feeling even worse. Not only did he have to deal with the muffled conversations, he also had to worry about the hundreds of eyes that stared at him. Inquisitive, they tracked his every movement, silently judging him to see if he could hold his own.

Ciel tugged anxiously at his tie and then smoothed down the front of his suit again. He couldn't keep still under the intense gazes and his heart hammered against his chest. Next to him, Claude didn't look any better and Ciel worried that neither of them would make it through the ceremony without passing out. He had good reason to feel nervous though and he reached up to adjust the flower pinned to his suit.

"Stop it," Claude hissed. "You're making me edgy."

"I can't help it," Ciel growled back. "I'm nervous."

Claude gave a hollow laugh. "You're nervous? What do you think I am?"

Ciel's lips twitched. "Scared shitless?"

"Har," Claude grunted and pushed up his glasses. "I believe you're the one who looks like he's about to piss himself."

Ciel scowled. "If we weren't in a church right now, I'd strangle you." His eyes darted to the congregation that sat in the pews and he could feel their heavy gaze on them once more. The mass amount of people only made him even more nervous and Ciel tried to focus his attention on something else. Like the flowers that lined the altar. That was a safe and neutral object.

His fingers twitched, wanting to play with his tie again and Ciel firmly clasped his hands together in front of him. Despite the cool air in the church, sweat still beaded up on his hairline and Ciel wished the ground would open up to swallow him. He never thought a wedding could be so nerve wracking.

He jumped when the organ started to play and Claude grabbed his wrist. "Relax; they're not coming just yet." Claude shook his head. "Seriously now, you're making me freak out."

"This is all your fault," Ciel grumbled.

Claude didn't answer him and instead turned to look down the aisle. Ciel sighed heavily and followed his lead. Despite his nervousness, he still found himself looking forward to seeing Sebastian walking down the aisle. The thought made his heart race even more and Ciel took a few deep breaths to steady himself. The last thing he needed was to pass out. No one would let him live that down.

The flower girls moved past them, sprinkling the petals onto the ground with cheerful smiles. Ciel vaguely wondered who would have to clean up the mess afterwards. Behind them, a small procession of bridesmaids moved down the aisle and Ciel shifted to look around them. He hoped to see Sebastian, but the line of females moved too slowly and he huffed in annoyance.

The organ struck another key, raising the tone and almost like a wave, the congregation turned to face the back of the church. Next to him, Claude swallowed audibly and Ciel took comfort in knowing that someone as composed as Claude had trouble controlling himself now.

His breath caught in his throat as Sebastian moved down the aisle and he locked his knees together as they started to quiver. Sebastian looked stunning in the crisp black suit and Ciel traced over every line that made up Sebastian's body. The suit fit well and despite Sebastian's long and loud complaining at the tailors, it had obviously been worth it.

Blue eyes slid to the woman next to him. She smiled softly as they walked down the aisle, her white dress a stark contrast to Sebastian's black suit. Two opposites in almost every sense of the word, yet they complimented each other well. Yin and yang, Ciel figured as they approached the altar and next to him, Claude shifted in place.

Despite his racing heart and anxiety that he felt, Ciel couldn't help but find some humor in the whole situation. Hannah's father had passed away several years ago and she had asked Sebastian to take his place. To have Sebastian lead the bride down the aisle seemed almost funny and Ciel wondered who led who. Although, it was a straight shot and Sebastian had walked the aisle several times during rehearsal to make sure he knew how many steps it would take.

They came to a stop in front of them and Hannah pecked Sebastian's cheek before passing him off to Ciel. He gave Sebastian's hand a light squeeze as Hannah took her place across from Claude and felt himself relaxing with Sebastian next to him.

The piano twittered to a stop, the last note lingering in the air before eventually fading. It was a soft sound and Ciel could see Sebastian clinging to it until even he couldn't hear it. As Sebastian confessed to him earlier in the week, he liked weddings for all the sounds he could hear. But at the same time, he didn't like standing for hours.

"Tell me," Sebastian muttered softly next to him. "How terrified does Claude look?"

"Petrified."

Sebastian smirked. "He sounds it. His voice won't stop shaking and it cracks every now and then." He cocked his head to the side. "And he's sweating."

Ciel's shoulders shook as he tried to quell his laughter. "You're terrible."

"Made you laugh though," Sebastian murmured. "Although, you're just as bad as he is."

Heat blossomed across Ciel's face but he didn't deny Sebastian's statement. He knew all too well how nervous he was. Even though he didn't know why. It wasn't like he was the one getting married. But, standing at the front of the church with Sebastian at his side put certain things in perspective and had his mind racing.

He looked at Sebastian out of the corner of his eyes and traced over the familiar features he had come to know so well after several years. All the dips, curves, and lines that made up Sebastian's body, Ciel knew them all. Even with his eyes closed, Ciel could still map out Sebastian's body. He knew it intimately, a knowledge that came from years of living with Sebastian.

Their relationship wasn't without its trials though and they fought on occasion, but Ciel never once regretted his choice to move south with Sebastian. Through the four years that he had known Sebastian, Ciel would never regret meeting Sebastian all those years back. It was by far, the best thing to happen to him.

What had started out as a cautious and almost hesitant relationship nearly three years ago during Ciel's internship, had blossomed into a strong and steadfast one. Their time together during Ciel's internship was like a dance, one that had them circling around something more than friends, but not quite dating. Sebastian likened it to an interview and wanted to make sure that Ciel truly didn't mind giving everything up to move south.

It wasn't until after graduation, when Ciel showed up again on Sebastian's doorstep, that Sebastian finally conceded. Ciel wasn't going to give up and he remained adamant about his feelings. And now, two years later, Ciel still felt the same way about Sebastian as he had after their first kiss. His emotions, if anything, had grown stronger and Ciel knew that Sebastian felt the same.

He smiled at the thought and leaned closer to Sebastian. A hand reached for his and squeezed it gently, making Ciel sigh lowly. There was no other place Ciel wanted to be than next to Sebastian's side. It sounded cliché and overly sappy, but it was the truth. After all the trials they went through to get here, Ciel never wanted to leave. And if anything, the struggle had only made him want to stay with Sebastian even more.

His eyes darted back to Claude and Hannah as they said their vows. Claude's nerves sounded as though they had finally settled down, his voice strong and true as he spoke.

"Much better," Sebastian murmured and a warm smile crossed his face. "That's what I like to hear."

Ciel chuckled. "Looks like all that coaching you gave him paid off," he said.

Sebastian smirked. "Of course. I am Claude's best man. What kind of best man would I be if I couldn't help him recite his vows properly?"

"A horrible one," Ciel teased in a low whisper and gave Sebastian's hand another squeeze. He knew all too well how much Claude had stressed over the wedding and how hard Sebastian worked to make sure it flowed as smoothly as possible. "You did well."

"Thanks," Sebastian answered and they fell silent again as Hannah started to speak.

His hand continued to grasp Sebastian's, their fingers intertwined in a loose grip. Nothing would tear them apart and Ciel wouldn't let go of Sebastian for as long as he could.

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

"Will they smash the cake in each other's face?" Ciel asked as he cut into a piece of chicken.

"I doubt it," Sebastian answered. "Hannah made Claude swear not to do that. The dress she has is a family heirloom and she'd kill him if something happened to it."

Ciel snickered. "Black widow. Married not even a day and she kills her husband."

Sebastian laughed and sipped at his water. "Just don't let her hear you say that. She only looks meek and innocent, but I know she can pack a punch." He looked at his arms. "Although, she had a rather tight grip on my arm as we walked down the aisle. I think she felt nervous, but you'll never get her to admit that."

"She sure didn't look nervous," Ciel muttered. He glanced at Sebastian. "You though, looked devilishly handsome in that suit of yours. You caught the eye of nearly every single woman here."

"And yours I hope," Sebastian teased and leaned in for a kiss.

Ciel met him halfway, hands coming up to cup Sebastian's face. He could taste fruit on Sebastian's tongue and he pulled back before anyone could yell at them. "You always have my attention," he murmured and his lips brushed over Sebastian's once more. "I love you."

A low hum left Sebastian's mouth. "Love you, too," he said quietly. "Always."

Red touched Ciel's cheeks and he batted Sebastian away. "And Claude says I'm the sappy one."

Sebastian laughed. "Only for you," he said. He wiped his fingers on a napkin, cleaning away the moisture from the glass. "Shall we dance?"

"Uh," Ciel started. "I'm not the best of dancers."

"And I am?" Sebastian asked. He grabbed Ciel's hand. "Come on. If I remember correctly, there's an outdoor pavilion and we can dance there where no one will see us."

Ciel nibbled his lip but stood up regardless. So long as they didn't have to dance in front of a crowd, he would be fine. He led Sebastian outside and looked around for any guest, but they had the area to themselves. Through the cracked doors, he could just make out the music and his hand settled on Sebastian's hip.

"Can I have this dance?" Sebastian questioned and pulled him closer.

Ciel rolled his eyes as Sebastian kissed the back of his other hand. "You're such a dork," he said but leaned into Sebastian's body. "But yes, you can have this dance."

Sebastian's hand came down to curl around his hip and Ciel made a startled sound when Sebastian started to move. He stumbled over his feet, surprised that Sebastian seemed to know how to dance. Even though he couldn't see, Sebastian moved easily across the floor and Ciel struggled to keep up.

"I thought you said you couldn't dance," Ciel accused as they glided across the floor.

"My mother made me take lessons when I was younger. You don't need to see in order to dance," Sebastian said. "I didn't last very long though. The dance instructor and I kept butting heads, so I ended up quitting."

Ciel sulked. "I still think you're better than me," he said. "At least you know what you're doing."

Sebastian chuckled. "It's just a slow dance, Ciel," he said. "You barely have to move compared to other dances."

"Still," Ciel repeated and their pace slowed even more until their bodies swayed lightly to the music. Every so often, Sebastian would move his feet and Ciel would shuffle after him, but he found he could handle the new motions. It allowed Sebastian to hold him flush against his body and Ciel rested his head on his chest. "This is nice."

A low hum of agreement left Sebastian. If Ciel closed his eyes, he could pretend it was just them and no one else. The wedding didn't exist just behind the door and no one could spy on them. No one but the setting sun that sank low into the horizon, tossing vivid colors into the sky. It was an audience of one and it watched them move slowly, providing the last dying embers of light for their dance.

The song ended and Sebastian drifted over to the railing. His hand reached for the wood and he leaned against it when he found it. Ciel came up alongside him and rested his arms along the surface as they faced the setting sun.

"It's nice," he said.

"It feels nice," Sebastian said, his eyes closed as he faced the sun. "It's warm on my skin, like the sun is smiling. It reminds me of you."

Ciel sputtered. "How does the sun remind you of me?" he asked.

Sebastian smirked. "Because you're always warm against my body when I hold you," he answered. "In that way, you're like the sun."

Red crept up the back of Ciel's neck and touched the tips of his ears. "You would say something like that."

"You like it," Sebastian teased and bumped his shoulder.

Ciel grumbled under his breath but didn't deny the words. Although if Sebastian saw him as the sun, Ciel thought of Sebastian as the moon. He lived in the darkness and embraced it, didn't fear it as most people did. His home was the darkness of the night. And like the sun and moon, they were fated never to truly see each other.

Ciel could always chase after Sebastian, as the sun did the moon on their endless treks through the skies. But even if he caught him, Sebastian would never see him. The darkness that surrounded him was too great and it sucked away the light that made up Ciel's world. Light and dark, opposites but unable to exist without the other. Just as the moon and sun needed each other.

Without one, the other couldn't exist. The constant tug and pull of their gravities kept them aligned and aware of each other, even if Sebastian couldn't see him. He could still feel Ciel's presence and knew of his touch. And for Sebastian, that alone sustained him.

He sighed. "Come here you," Ciel said and stood on his toes to give Sebastian a kiss. Warm arms wrapped around his waist, drawing him closer and Ciel relished the warmth that passed between them.

Their bodies pressed together and it felt like coming home. Sebastian was warm and familiar, and it threatened to drown Ciel in everything that was Sebastian. His scent, his touch, his voice, and his caress. Everything about him made Ciel fall further under his spell and he found that he wasn't in a hurry to escape. A part of Ciel doubted he ever would try to flee the tight grasp that Sebastian had over him.

They broke apart with a soft sound and Ciel rested his head against Sebastian's chest with a small sigh. Their story wasn't a fairy tale ending, not by a long shot. But he figured it was the closest thing they could get. And in a way, this was just as good. He found fairy tale endings overrated anyway.

Ciel closed his eyes, letting Sebastian hold him. He could hear Sebastian's steady heartbeat, the sound lulling him into a peaceful abyss and he found himself trying to match Sebastian's breathing.

He made a disgruntled sound when Sebastian shifted and Ciel reluctantly opened his eyes. The sun had sunk further below the horizon, leaving nothing but a thin sliver of a rounded disk. Darkness had started to overtake the sky and pulled the warmth from the air. "We should go back inside," Sebastian said. "They're probably ready to cut the cake."

"Cake sounds good," Ciel said and untangled himself from Sebastian's embrace. The sun finally slipped below the horizon, bathing the area in darkness. "And then we send them off?"

Sebastian nodded. "Yeah. They'll go on their honeymoon and I can finally have some peace. No more of Claude's late night calls worrying about miniscule things."

Ciel laughed as they walked inside and the heat of the room enveloped them. Claude spotted them instantly and waved them over. "Where did y'all go? We're just about ready to cut the cake." He held up a knife for emphasis. "And I couldn't cut it without y'all."

"Thanks for being so considerate," Sebastian drawled as they approached the table. "I'm surprised you even let us this close to the cake, knowing how big of a sweet tooth we have."

Claude pushed up his glasses. "I figured you deserved a reward after everything I put you through in the past few months. And what better reward than the first piece of cake?"

Ciel frowned. "I thought that piece belonged to the married couple?"

Hannah shrugged. "Our wedding, our rules," she said and smiled warmly at him. "Do you want a large piece or not?"

He eyed the cake and then nodded. "Whatever floats your boat."

"Wood," Sebastian muttered next to him and Ciel gave him a strange look.

Claude smirked and started to cut the cake, sectioning out a large piece for Sebastian before passing the knife over to Hannah. She mimicked his action and cut out another piece for Ciel, carefully placing it on the plate.

Ciel's mouth watered at the sight of the cakes. The white fondant gleamed under the bright lighting and the piping only made it look more elegant. Small drops of icing covered the sides of the cake and a delicate rose sat near the base, dusted with red powder. He couldn't wait to taste the sweet icing and moist cake. They had tried several samples months prior but that paled in comparison to the real thing.

"Looks almost too good to eat," he said with a laugh.

"We thought so too," Claude said and looked down at the plate in his hand. "But cake this good shouldn't go to waste."

Ciel nodded in agreement and reached for the plate, anxious to try some. He barely had time to catch the smirk that flickered across Hannah's face before something soft and sweet smelling filled his senses. He stumbled back in surprise, the feeling still clinging to him and Ciel brought his hands up to wipe at the cake that covered his eyes.

The icing clumped heavily to his eyelashes and Ciel looked down at his cake covered hands. "That was a waste of good cake," he moaned and looked at Hannah. Her eyes danced with amusement and a quick look at Sebastian showed that he hadn't faired any better with his cake. He pointed at Sebastian. "And that's just not fair."

Sebastian shook his head, flinging pieces of cake to the ground. "He gave me a brief warning," he said and brought a finger to his mouth to suck off the icing. "Although, saying, 'prepare yourself' and then shoving the cake in my face wasn't the best of warnings."

Claude chuckled. "Had to shove cake in someone's face and since we couldn't do it to each other, we figured y'all were the next best choice."

"Charming," Sebastian said dryly. "I will remember this."

"I'm sure you will," Claude said and patted him on the shoulder. "But just think. You can return the favor whenever you and Ciel tie the knot."

Ciel froze in his attempts to clean off the cake and felt his face heat up under the icing. Next to him, Sebastian had stiffened as well but seemed to recover quicker than Ciel. "That would be too easy," he said casually. "I would make sure to do something far more sinister. Now, can I have a towel? I smell like a cake shop."

Hannah passed them a towel and Ciel leaned over to wipe the remaining icing and cake from his face. He still felt like it was a waste of perfectly good cake and only hoped they would get a proper piece after this. His nose scrunched as the scent of sweet sugar clung to his face and his stomach turned at the smell.

"I need a shower before I can eat anything," he groaned and ran a hand through his hair. He grimaced when he smeared icing into his hair and tugged his hand away before he could make matters worse.

"Did I get it all off?" Sebastian asked and held his towel loosely at his side.

Ciel shook his head. "Almost. You have a little bit right here," he said and leaned forward to lick the dollop of icing off Sebastian's cheek. "There. All clean."

"Tease," Sebastian murmured in his ear.

"I try," Ciel said with a smug smirk. He turned to Claude. "Do you need us anymore? I'd really like to take a shower now."

Claude hummed. "I suppose we could let you go. There's nothing else after this but our departure and I feel we've tortured you enough." Ciel rolled his eyes. "We'll see y'all in a few weeks. Thanks again for watching the apartment."

Sebastian nodded. "No problem. Have fun at the coast. Bring us back a gift," he teased as he shook Claude's hand. "And congratulations. I'm happy for you."

Amber eyes softened slightly. "Thanks Sebastian."

Hannah stepped up to him and Ciel cocked his head at the two boxes in her hands. "They're for you two. Since you didn't get a chance to eat some cake properly," she said and Ciel accepted them.

"I think this makes up for everything," he said with a laugh and glanced at Sebastian. "Ready?"

Sebastian nodded. "You're the one driving," he reminded him.

"Well, I'm ready," Ciel said and led Sebastian out of the room. They walked through the empty hallway and he tugged at his tie, glad to loosen it after wearing the constricting fabric for hours. "I call first dibs on the shower."

A low chuckle left Sebastian's mouth. "Fine. But I pick the song tonight."

Ciel laced his fingers with Sebastian's. "I can deal with that," he said and squeezed Sebastian's hand. "Let's go home. We can talk more there."

They left the building, the stars already shining brightly in the sky while the cicadas sang a chorus to the glowing heavens. And the night offered a beauty of its own.

**.:|Seeing in the Dark|:.**

Ciel sighed as he rubbed the towel through his damp hair. It took a while to wash out all the icing but he no longer smelled like a cake. It made him feel refreshed and Ciel sighed again as he took a seat on the couch. A few pieces of paper littered the coffee table and he reached for the topmost sheet. Notes filled the page, creating a song on the staff.

He easily recognized it and hummed the tune lightly. He knew the first few lines without even looking, having penned them onto the staff nearly four years ago when he first met Sebastian. Without knowing it, Ciel had written the start to one of Sebastian's best compositions.

He draped the towel around his neck and stared at the pages on the table. Sebastian had a penchant for playing duets with him and Ciel found that he couldn't turn him down. Sebastian wasn't the only one who enjoyed it and Ciel looked forward to the evenings they played together. For Sebastian to pick this song meant he was in a reminiscing mood.

Ciel blamed the wedding for the sudden nostalgia along with Claude's comment. He shook his head to keep the thoughts from sinking into his mind and stood up to get his cello. It sat next to the piano and he gathered it into his arms, letting the familiar curves and weight sink against his body.

With ease, he ran through the scales and then played the first few notes of the song. The deep tremor of the cello echoed throughout the apartment, filling the air with its melody. Soot trotted over to investigate the noise, the bell on her collar ringing lightly. She sniffed his foot and then jumped onto the piano bench as he continued to play.

Soot often joined them during their duets, watching them play with rapt attention. Her eyes would track their movements and her tail almost seemed to move in time with the beat. Ciel likened her to metronome but found himself secretly amazed at how attentive she would become while they played. Their own mini audience.

He played a few more notes for her and she purred happily. "I don't know about you, Soot," Ciel said and tapped her lightly on the head with the bow.

"She's a special cat," Sebastian said next to him and Ciel jumped lightly. "She's a musical cat. Probably because she's always had music around her since she was a kitten."

"I wouldn't be surprised," Ciel said as Sebastian took a seat next to Soot. She cried loudly and made a few circles on the bench, asking him to play.

Sebastian rubbed her ears and murmured sweet words to her as he opened the fallboard. "I heard you playing earlier. Are you warmed up already?"

Ciel nodded. "For the most part."

A few notes sounded throughout the apartment as Sebastian compressed the keys. His fingers ran up and down the scale, and played short melodies to warm himself up. He pressed a few more keys and then nodded. "Ready."

"You would pick this song," Ciel said as he readied the bow.

"I felt the title fitting," Sebastian answered.

Ciel hummed and drew the bow across the strings. Sebastian answered his call with a few keys on the piano and Ciel echoed the tune. For several lines, they passed the melody off to each other until they reached a pause. A short rest that allowed them to collect a breath and compose themselves before playing as one.

Piano and cello bled together, creating the notes and shaping the air around them. The staff sprung from the pages and brought the inked notes to life, giving them wings to fly. Like birds tasting flight for the first time, they leapt from the lines and responded with gusto, singing and trilling their unique sounds. With light winds, they circled around them and if Ciel closed his eyes, he swore that he could feel the faintest touch of a wing brush against his cheek.

Sebastian's music was magical. It created worlds in Ciel's mind that he didn't know existed. They formed themselves on the base of each note and slowly built up as the music continued. And through the music, he didn't need words to explain how he felt or to know what was on Sebastian's mind. The notes said it all.

If a picture was worth a thousand words, than music must be worth two thousand. It created unfathomable depths of ardor throughout Ciel, each note resounding along the raw emotions in his body. Like fingers playing a stringed instrument, they plucked the strings of his emotions until Ciel surrendered himself to the notes.

He gave up control of his emotions and his senses, letting the music steal everything away from him. Perhaps Will was right in that point. Sebastian's music stole one's soul. But Ciel would sell it away a hundred times over if it meant losing himself to the thrilling world that Sebastian's music brought him to.

Their instruments peaked, a high trill that sent shivers down Ciel's spine and he had to remember to breathe so he could play the next note. The composition never failed to make Ciel a trembling pile of limbs and he let out a shaky breath. A quick look at Sebastian showed that he was no better, his shoulders tense and his back straight. Even Soot hadn't escaped the electrified air and her tail stood straight in the air, her eyes wide.

The bow greeted the strings again, the notes growing softer as Ciel reclaimed his senses and emotions once more. It felt like learning how to breathe and the first breath he took was like his first. Greedily, he sucked in more air and let it fill his lungs as the song ended. One last glide across the strings and the last note hung heavily in the air.

Sebastian followed it with a final note of his own, the two notes wrapping around each other before dispensing in the air. With it gone, Ciel slumped in his chair and leaned his head back.

"I think you named that piece appropriately," he said and looked at the title in question. It flowed in neat calligraphy at the top of the page: 'For When There are no Words.' "It takes my breath away so I don't even have the energy to speak."

"For when there are no words," Sebastian answered and Ciel grunted. "Music is the next best thing."

Ciel sat up and put his cello back on its stand. "I think we can find a different way to speak without using words," he said and understanding dawned on Sebastian's face.

He turned around. "Come here," Sebastian said, gesturing for him to come closer. Ciel complied and drifted over to Sebastian's side. Once close enough, Sebastian reached for him and tugged him down for a kiss. "I love you," he murmured.

Ciel didn't answer as their lips met in a chaste kiss, one that had his eyes fluttering shut. He could never tire of kissing Sebastian. Each time brought a new experience. One time innocent, another teasing, and sometimes rough and demanding. It made it impossible to tell which Sebastian would give him and it made Ciel look forward to each kiss.

And every time their lips met, it only reminded Ciel that Sebastian was his. That this wasn't a dream and that he wasn't lost to some unreachable fantasy. Sebastian was real and he loved him just as much as Ciel loved him. The thought alone could bring Ciel to his knees and even after the years that passed, he still found it hard to believe that this wasn't a dream.

At times, he would wake up and expect to find himself in his own room back up north. Because everything felt too good to be true. But then he would turn to his side and find Sebastian sleeping soundly next to him, hair mussed and snoring softly. It never grew old and Ciel would fall back into an easy sleep with a smile on his face.

He tilted his head to the side as Sebastian's lips trailed down his neck. They brushed against the skin, touching but not giving him what he wanted while curious hands traced the lines of his body. The burned a path of fire wherever curious fingers touched and Ciel arched into Sebastian's hands, begging for more.

Sebastian played him like an instrument and Ciel found that only fitting. Hands that could play the piano so gracefully and skillfully could also do the same to him. They manipulated his body and under their touch, Sebastian could compose an entire piece from the sounds Ciel made. He knew every caress that would make Ciel sing and committed them to memory.

Lips made their way back up to Ciel's mouth and Ciel's hands joined in their dance on the staff. They threaded their way through Sebastian's hair and his nails lightly scratched at the nape of his neck, an action that had Sebastian keening in pleasure.

Sebastian's mouth grew more persistent and Ciel broke away with a gasp. "Bed," he panted against Sebastian's lips and they stumbled to the bedroom, a mess of limbs and soft words. It felt like a crime to part even for a moment, even if it would've made walking easier.

With a low grunt, Ciel pulled Sebastian back onto the bed and they bounced slightly. Sebastian's hands searched for the hem of his shirt and upon finding it, slowly inched it up. His palms brushed against sensitive skin in a loving caress that had Ciel squirming on the bed.

He hated and loved when Sebastian worshiped his body this way. It drove him crazy and had him begging Sebastian to hurry up. But at the same time, he craved more of the intimate gestures. It was just another way that Sebastian showed his love to him and Ciel clung to each action.

His breath caught when Sebastian finally divested him of his shirt and soft lips came to a stop above his rapidly beating heart. A light kiss, like that of a hummingbirds touch against his skin, had Ciel shivering before Sebastian pulled away from the spot. Long fingers traced up and across from his heart, stroking down until they found Ciel's fingers.

Slowly, almost as though Sebastian worried he would startle Ciel if he moved too quickly, he grasped Ciel's left hand. Ciel's breath came harder and faster as Sebastian pressed a kiss to each knuckle and then hovered above the fourth finger. Another kiss touched his skin and Sebastian mouthed something against the spot.

Ciel swallowed heavily. He didn't need to hear the words to understand them, he already knew what Sebastian said. 'I love you.'

It was a promise and a statement wrapped in one. One that Ciel didn't doubt. He kept the promise close to his heart, knowing that he wasn't the only one affected by the wedding today.

He reached up, grasping onto Sebastian and dragging him closer. He wanted to feel the familiar weight of Sebastian's body against his. Ciel's fingers tugged at Sebastian's shirt and quickly rid him of the fabric while Sebastian removed his pants. He wiggled out of the material and moved back further on the bed, leading Sebastian along with him.

Their lips met again in a harsh kiss, teeth accidently clicking together. Sebastian tilted his head to soften this kiss and Ciel's arms draped around his shoulders, pulling him closer. Sweat made their bodies slide against each other, setting every nerve on fire and creating a spark that had Ciel moaning in pleasure.

His hips rolled against Sebastian while his legs parted, spreading to accommodate Sebastian's body. The heat between them spiked and the flames burned hotly at the new contact. Soft noises fell from Ciel's mouth as a slick tongue moved down his body, creating liquid fire in his veins.

It made Ciel feel like a phoenix, succumbing to the flames that Sebastian sparked inside him until he turned into a smoldering pile of ash. But then Sebastian's mouth found his again and breathed life back into him. The seemingly endless cycle only served to heighten his senses, making him feel as though he could fly like the grand mythical creature.

"Relax," Sebastian cooed and ran a warm hand down the inside of his thighs. "Let me take care of you."

Ciel gave a breathless laugh that hitched slightly at the first intrusion. "You always take care of me," he said. He shuddered as Sebastian's hand skimmed over a sensitive patch of skin and then leaned down to kiss the spot.

Sebastian pulled back and looked at him as best he could, crimson eyes smoldering with emotions. "Because I care about you," he said and lowered his head once more.

A low curse left Ciel as Sebastian worked to ease some of the pain, his mouth quickly making Ciel forget about the burning ache in his body. He watched Sebastian work, finding the sight tantalizing. The normally pale skin had grown flushed and Ciel could see every muscle working under the blushed tone. It was a different kind of beauty, one that Ciel couldn't look away from.

"Beautiful," Ciel moaned and his toes curled into the sheets when Sebastian's fingers pressed deep into him. He keened and his vision darkened for a moment before his eyes slit open.

"I know that sound," Sebastian murmured and withdrew.

Ciel whined at the loss but didn't have the strength to complain further. Not when Sebastian hovered over him again, hair plastered to his forehead and looking thoroughly mussed. He stretched his arms up and lips pressed together as their bodies joined with a soft sigh, like pieces of a puzzle connecting.

He could feel Sebastian's heart beat inside him, a strong and steady rhythm that Ciel's heart sought to match. To beat as one and create a single body from two. A melding of parts to create something new.

Their bodies moved together, sliding and pressing against each other; never pulling away for a second. Because even a second apart felt too long. Nothing could pass between the areas where their bodies aligned.

Sheets rustled under them and Ciel's head tipped back in pleasure. He guided Sebastian's head to his chest, letting wandering lips work their way from his collarbone up to his neck. They traced the hard lines of the bone before kissing the hollow of his throat and then they moved onto new patches of skin.

A light nibble on the underside of his jaw had Ciel gasping and rocking harder to meet Sebastian. It wasn't enough, it never was with Sebastian. He could pick Ciel apart and put him back together each time, but it would still leave him craving more. Like an addict, Ciel could never get enough of Sebastian. He was Ciel's drug.

"That's it," Sebastian panted in the crook of his neck as the sounds from his mouth grew louder. Ciel never held back his voice with Sebastian, knowing all too well how Sebastian responded to sound. Each gasp, grunt, or moan told Sebastian what he needed to know and responded in turn.

Their sounds filled the bedroom, creating an orchestra of a different kind. Ciel led the instruments but Sebastian still composed the melody, always making sure to leave Ciel breathless and panting for breath. But it was a tune of their own making; one formed from soft sighs, the low creaking of the bed, and gasped words.

Ciel's legs tightened around Sebastian's hips, pulling him closer as their personal concert threatened to reach its peak. The softer notes gave way to louder ones – high-pitched wails and frantic but broken words as the crescendo grew closer. But through the steady climb, never once did the piece lose its intimacy. They remained connected - be it through a clasped hand or a sloppy kiss – as their bodies steadily rocked against one another.

Ciel caved in first, his words catching in his throat as his body shook harshly on the bed. Every nerve stood on end, tingling with euphoria and gave him a sense of alertness that made him even more aware of Sebastian. His chest heaved for breath and his fingers tangled through damp dark locks as Sebastian grunted into his neck.

He held Sebastian close as he sought his finish, gasping broken words filled with adoration until Sebastian surrendered as well. Hips jerked weakly until they finally stilled and Ciel could feel Sebastian's heart racing erratically in his chest. His was no better and Ciel lazily traced his hands across the open expanse of Sebastian's back as they caught their breath.

The drying sweat made his skin prickle and he shivered as Sebastian shifted over him. He stared up at Sebastian and unseeing crimson eyes looked directly back at him. They looked stunning in the low lighting, the light making them look darker than they were and Ciel continued to stare at them.

Even if Sebastian couldn't see him and would never know what he looked like, Ciel wouldn't trade him for anyone else. He had found perfection with Sebastian, even if everyone else viewed him as broken. They would never know what they lost by disregarding Sebastian due to his blindness. But their loss was Ciel's gain.

True, Sebastian was blind, but Ciel thought that he had better vision than anyone else did. He could look past the façade that everyone wore and see what really mattered. It gave him his own sense of beauty and Sebastian defined people by that. Not by their looks, their social class, or what they wore. None of that mattered to him. All that mattered was what he found inside.

Ciel hummed happily at the thought and captured Sebastian's lips in a tender kiss. Faint whispered words passed between them, each one making Ciel's heart thrum. Words carried a heavy weight, both loving and cruel ones. But Ciel spoke his with a conviction and a truth that he never had before.

Under Sebastian's steady hands and talented fingers, Ciel had become the person he always thought he was. He likened himself to a phoenix once more, a phoenix birthed from the discarded notes that fell from Sebastian's fingers.

His wings stretched long and gracefully, built from the staff and feathered with the notes penned along its lines. And his voice sang loud and clear, in a melody crafted from deep within Sebastian's thoughts and heart. Each note and tune meticulously placed to pull on the right emotions until everyone could hear him.

Together, they carried him away from the earth, leaving behind the boundaries that humans had drawn for themselves. It took him to a place that existed only inside his mind - a place where Sebastian's music and affection surrounded him, blending into an endless song that could transcend time.

* * *

**A/N**: Hard to believe this story is over already, haha. I want to thank everyone for their wonderful support throughout the story and for reading it all the way through. I'm truly grateful for every review, PM, and every word I received. Y'all never failed to encourage me, bring a smile to my face, and drive me forward - and to me, that means so much. Parts of this story meant a lot to me and while I was a bit hesitant to write/post about them, I'm glad I did and y'all's support on it meant the world.

I also want to thank socialbutrfly1379 again for working with me and this story, editing it all in one go while I was out of Japan. She was amazing and finished it all before I even came back, allowing me to post much sooner than I planned ^^ I've met wonderful people throughout the posting of this story too, and I'm glad to have met them - I love talking with everyone XD

Thank y'all again, so much. From the bottom of my heart and every other saying to express gratitude. Thank you for everything.

~Disgruntled Minion


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